When Shadows Surround You
by Tai Black
Summary: There was a moment that wasn't the chakra bond that bound them, but the need to be together and forget where his body ended and where the other's began... Shikamaru and Neji were bound by their chakra and it was completely troublesome. NC17.ShikaNejiShika
1. Chakra Bond

**Disclaimer: **I don't own **Naruto**, otherwise** ShikaNeji **would be canon.

**A/N: **Thisfanfic is for the birthday-lady** Okami Rayne-sama****, **who inspired me to fell in love with** ShikaNejiShika (HAPPY B-DAY SWEETIE! ), **and for** Akira-kun-nii**who made me want to write in English and try to be as fucking awesome as he is :P . So I hope the plot is not too crack, the characters not too OOC, my English not too bad and the lemon not too stupid (difficult). This is my first English fanfic. I'm doing a hard job here - _google translator_ 24/7, _dictionary_ in hands, _synonyms__ book_ open on the table. And if _Kami-sama_helps it will be a funny drive till the end!

**BETA: ****SpyYoung****, **thanks for the amount of patience with all my PM and the hard work! I'll try to improve my English to easy the trouble ^^

Fanfiction for the Project WTF no Jutsu, **Marauders Map Forum**. Hope you enjoy this freakiness.

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><p><strong>.<strong>

**When Shadows Surround You**

_-x-  
><em>

_Chapter One_

**Chakra Bond**

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><p>"Troublesome…" he whispered. Hair tied with a black band to his crown. His expression blank deep in thought and his lips pressed together.<p>

"_Troublesome?_" the other inquired. "You said '_Troublesome_'?"

The second man was looking at the first one with a blank expression and veins around his eyes, Byakugan activated.

"Yes, I just said '_Troublesome_'…"

"How can you be so calm?" He asked, couldn't move his hands to move his bangs far from his face. What he was seeing through his white eyes was _tremendously_troublesome.

He would never do a favor for the Hokage ever again.

_Never again!_

His eyes started monitoring the dark lashes again. Neji could see the huge flux of chakra all over the shadows that Shikamaru was manipulating. It was thick and intense; the chakra was running in the darkened lines, bonding both of them together.

And that was the problem. He was just there to help Nara to see and understand his chakra threads better, and after two hours, Shikamaru – after trying really hard – couldn't release the tight embrace of his shadows around Neji.

"So… What now?"

Shikamaru looked at him, his face without any expression, his eyes looking across Neji's body, thoughts travelling in his genius mind for an answer.

"I'll try again to cut the flux of chakra and when I say '_now_' you should walk in any direction"

"Fine!" Neji was terrified. He could barely think clear with the weird trapping sensation. As if he needed another cage to belong in.

The pineapple boy put all his thoughts and feelings in his chakra, closing his eyes in a weird attempt of control. He could feel his own chakra over his body, and its projection, running on the ground and involving Hyūga's shadows, controlling it.

Trying to calm down he took a deep breath. He looked like he relaxed, but in fact he was freaking out. Never in his twenty years has this happened to him, to be tied up with another person without even trying!

He tried to cut the chakra floss, loosening it and finally feeling the release.

"Now!" his voice was deep with the strange strength he was doing to untie their shadows.

The Hyūga started to walk to his left, dropping their face contact and letting go a breath of relief. Four tiny steps, two more, two again and then it happened.

At the ninth step he felt the unpleasant sensation of being trapped. A huge crack sounded in his eardrums. He couldn't keep walking even with all the power of his chakra concentrated in his legs.

"_FUCK!_" Both yelled at the same time.

Their lungs without air, their guts full with weird pain, their legs working at the same time to put their bodies close together. Just two steps back and they were ok again.

Shikamaru curved his body, pressing his hands in his belly, trying to stop the acute pain. His brow started to sweat and his breath was uneven.

_Fuck. Fuck. Fuck! What the hell was happening?_

"What the _FUCK_, Nara?" he groaned angrily.

"I don't know, ok!"

Shikamaru was pissed. _Really_pissed. He couldn't even imagine what was happening. His thoughts were running fast in his mind, looking for any explanation that didn't appear to show up.

_Never_. Never has it happened to him. He couldn't even create a silly explanation. What was the meaning of being a genius when you cannot even understand your own fucking jutsu?

"We should go to the Hokage, maybe she can help us" He said, giving up his pride and accepting that he couldn't do anything else. "Can you move?"

Neji moved his arms and attempted one step. He could move, even if Shikamaru was still in place, which was weird, but it worked.

"Hm. Think so."

And then they started moving.

Side by side, three steps between them, they walked the entire path back to the Hokage's Tower, wishing in their thoughts that she could help them, or at least destroy forever Shikamaru's chakra flux – but Neji wasn't that silly to say it aloud.

It was strange, because the electricity was still there, dormant but present, sending little shocks all over their bodies. They couldn't see the shadows on the floor, but it was there, like a ghost remembering its existence with every single weak pinch of chakra down their spine.

They made the walk in silence, sometimes Shikamaru would sigh and glance at the sky, looking for calm clouds to keep him in a light peace of mind and forget what was happening. But Neji couldn't stop the strong wave of thoughts, it was stupid, because he knew he couldn't find an answer by himself, but it was uncontrolled, in a kind of desperation he was not used to feeling.

So there they were, looking expectant to the door, waiting for Shizune to come back and say they could walk in. The door spread open and the med-nin looked them with a small smile.

"You can come in" she said with the stupid smile on her face before disappear in the hallway.

They did, and a big headache struck Neji in his temples when he saw Naruto, Kiba, Sakura and Kakashi in the room. No, he didn't deserve it! It was not his fate to be so damned unlucky, it couldn't be!

"So, how was it?" the Hokage asked, looking to Shikamaru with a calm expression.

"Ridiculous" Neji muttered.

"Hm?"

"It went bad" Shikamaru said.

"Bad? _Tremendously_bad, you mean" the Hyūga scrutinized.

"Yeah, deeply and troublesomely bad"

Tsunade widened her eyes, looking straight from one to the other, waiting for some explanation.

"Shikamaru's chakra is ok" the long hair man started "But it stuck us together" And he felt a huge homicidal sensation when Naruto and Kiba started laughing like idiots.

"It's not funny" Kakashi commented, stopping the boys in the act, his voice sounding completely serious – which was odd considering his carefree character.

"C'mon, Kakashi-sensei! They're _stuck together_!" Naruto said with his stupid loud voice.

"How did you do that?" Sakura asked, looking as they were some kind of freak or something.

"If I knew I sure would not be here to ask Hokage-sama's help" Shikamaru said monotonously.

"Gosh, that's sweet! They need _help_to be apart!" Kiba squealed stupidly.

"Quit the bullshit, Inuzuka!" Neji was pissed, his eyes narrowed in the dog-nin's direction, dangerous screaming in his white orbs.

"Fine, explain it" the old lady ordered.

"After two hours trying all the kinds of jutsu for Neji to understand my chakra flux and point out the weakness in it, we're going to stop for today, but my fucking shadows really didn't want to cooperate!"

"Watch your mouth, young man."

"Whatever!" he rolled his eyes and kept talking "We did all we had in mind: different jutsu, chakra repealing, weakening my chakra power, everything! But this fucking shadows look like they're not under my control!"

"Nara…"

"Sorry!" he snorted, tired of this.

"Looks like we need Shikaku's help" Kakashi pointed, scratching his head.

"Finally a good idea" Neji murmured, looking the floor.

_Thanks Kami-sama. I knew my fate wasn't that bad._

"But my father is not in Konoha!" Nara's voice sounded squeezed. Neji felt his death approaching around the corner.

"Yes, but he will be back in ten days" Tsunade explained "Now show me what happens"

"NO!" both yelled at the same time, and looked each other painfully.

"Don't be spoiled, Shikamaru" the Fifth said quietly, observing their angry expression.

"Fine!" he almost shouted.

Shikamaru wanted to kill someone, why the hell was this happening to him? He was just trying to control even more his shadows and jutsu. He wanted to improve it, which was weird from him; to strive for something, he would never do that again. The young men started to walk at the same time, the Hyūga shut his eyes, preparing him-self for the pain.

Seven steps were not enough. Shikamaru huffed loudly and killed the distance in one large step.

"FUCK!" he shouted angrily and Neji frowned, breathing uneven, crossing his hands in his belly, pressing his jaws together.

Nara stepped back, feeling the pain start to dissolve inside him. He crouched like a little boy in pain, feeling the relieve brush his gut and lungs.

"Holly shit!" Naruto was watching both brunet with amusement "That's pretty strong, eh?"

"It's almost _poetic_" Kiba joked.

"Shut up!"

Neji's voice sounded so cracked that Kakashi almost drop his jaw in a surprise expression. That wasn't good at all. He observed both of them, Neji with one hand in his hips, maintaining his cool appearance, eyes still closed. Shikamaru was shaking hands against his eyes, coughing.

"I've never seen something like this… Looks like a mean trick" Sakura said, kneeling beside the chūnin and putting some healing chakra in his chest and stomach.

"Hyūga, can you see with your Byakugan what exactly happens with the chakra when you are far from each other?"

"Hell no!" Shikamaru whimpered, almost feeling the pain shock his body again.

White orbs focused in the other young man, Neji knew the Nara boy didn't have the same strength he had, and the pain in his face was so obvious he felt pity. It wasn't just because of the pain, but what man would like to be that weak in front of this amount of comrades? He could understand Shikamaru's view on that.

"Stay quiet" he said and activated his Byakugan.

And there it was: the chakra was okay, inside Shikamaru's body and in their connected shadows too, intense and firm. He could see his own chakra doing ok inside his chest, so he began to walk backwards, paying attention at their chakra connection and keeping his breath at a measured pace.

Soon he felt pain bashing his gut, ripping his lungs, making his Byakugan almost deactivate from the agony.

"Stop it!" Shikamaru shout in his knees.

"Just a sec" Neji murmured, putting his focus in their shadows and then in their bodies.

"THE HELL, HYUUGA!"

And then he moved: his shaking legs creating even more distance between their bodies, the ache growing stronger, tearing at his chest.

"NE-JI!"

The white orbs widened scared, he couldn't believe it. And then he felt like fire in his lungs and couldn't support it anymore, stepping forward to be closer to the other guy.

"You ok, Neji?" the concern in Kakashi's voice sounded weird.

"Man, you look like you just saw a ghost" Kiba muttered, patting Akamaru's head beside him.

"Our chakras…" he whispered "They are bonded"

"What the fuck?"

"Naruto, shut up!" the Hokage ordered "How bonded?"

"Intrinsically"

Shikamaru sat, barely breathing, trying to recover from the suffering, and pale for the large amount of pain, but his eyes focused on the other shinobi, searching for more explanations.

"Each chakra point is connected, so when we go far apart it starts pulling us back together…" he finished explaining, his tired expression warning of his weak amount of energy.

Kiba and Naruto were staring at them open-mouthed. It wasn't just weird, it sounded way too difficult to really understand what was happening.

"Troublesome…" Shikamaru said, coming back on his heels, rubbing his temples in a lazy movement.

"And now what?" Naruto asked looking at the two shinobi stunned.

"I would like to know…" Neji muttered, moving the bangs away from his eyes.

Tsunade sighed, hiding her face in her palms. That was a big pain in the ass. And when the fuck Shikaku was coming back? She asked herself if Kakashi was seeing the same big thing behind it or not. The Fifth looked at the grey-hair ninja and tried to read his unexpressed face, she couldn't, but something deep in his eyes showed her how concerned he was.

"Kiba, Sakura and Naruto you can go now, you did well in the mission"

"Oi, baa-chan! What is going to happen with them?"

"Naruto quit the gossip and leave!"

"But-"

"I'm trying to think but you're too loud and too orange"

"Orange-nin!" Kiba burst in laughs and Tsunade rolled her eyes, asking for some patience.

"Inuzuka…" she warned, eyes shut and breathing fast "Maybe my fist would speak better than my mouth."

It was enough, Naruto and Kiba ran out of the room in a flash with Akamaru on their heels. But Sakura stayed quiet, looking concerned at them.

"Do you need any healing?" she asked, watching him shake his head "Neji-san?"

"I'm fine, thanks Haruno"

And then she went out.

"Finally…" Tsunade muttered "Well, we will need to wait for Shikaku, now we just need for you two to stay quiet and keep together, till he's back"

"It's ten days!"

"I know that Shikamaru. It's not a nice situation for me either, but I can do nothing, it's your clan's ability not mine"

He rolled his eyes.

"You're a lazy kid, enjoy your days off"

"Days off?" the deep voice of Hyūga's made her look at him concerned.

"I can talk with your uncle if you want"

"And tell him that I'm bonded in the stupid jutsu of another shinobi?"

Kakashi breathed loudly.

"Maybe Hiashi-sama can help us seeing the chakra problem, taking into consideration that you're in pain while you tried to focus"

"It was crystal clear, Kakashi-sempai"

"Fine, we can think about it tomorrow, you need to rest, look at your faces… Maybe sake can help" she said with a sad smile, watching both turn around and walk away "Comeback at noon, we will try to fix it, or at least understand it…"

"Thanks, Hokage-sama" Neji's voice sounded inexpressive, before they cross the door-frame and disappear.

"Kakashi?"

"Hum…"

"What do you think about it?"

"I would prefer to do not think, but as you ask: Shikaku will not be very happy when he comes back."

She turned to face him "So you really think the same as me?"

"Nara's secret jutsu has been one of my favorite myths since I was an ANBU."

-x-

They walked slowly to Shikamaru's house, simple words were enough to make Neji accept that they better sleep there. It almost made him laugh like a little boy, because the stupid excuse that convinced him was: "_Don't you know my mom? She will totally freak out if I don't comeback without warning her about it first!_" but the long haired man just hid a smile and kept walking.

Nara Forest was a peaceful place, not that he was happy about being there under these conditions, but he needed to stop the unhealthy flux of thoughts. So he observed deer pacing around, calm and slowly… He could understand why Shikamaru was like he was, living in a smooth place like this, without cages in his mind, family hierarchy or hateful relatives who look at you like a vassal.

The younger one was watching his feet, hands in pockets and a sorrow expression. He felt the gaze of one of the stags and shivered just Ino and Choji use to come there; they were not used to having many visitors. Shikamaru could sense the curiosity of the animals in the air, twenty years was a long time and he was one to understand this herd as he belonged to it.

"Neji"

"Hm?"

"I'm sorry"

His voice was low, but the other could listen perfectly.

"It's not your fault, you know that. I think you hate this as much as I do, and that's enough a burden to handle."

"Yeah…"

The Hyūga looked over his shoulder at the guy beside him. He could feel the absent mood, the thick air involving the Chūnin, he wasn't just feeling guilty, he was certainly looking for a strategy to solve their problem. Neji smiled ruefully and looked forward again.

"They are curious about you" Shikamaru told simply.

"Who?"

"The herd"

Pearly eyes narrowed over the fence that separated the unpaved path and the forest, seeing the movement of the animals. They were still calm and relaxed, but keep stalking them across the pen.

"How do you know that?"

"I've know them since I was a baby" he said hunching.

"So…" Neji smiled, not letting his gaze fall in the other man's direction "Should you introduce me?"

Shikamaru grinned, amused by the flash of joy in the elder's tone.

"Maybe tomorrow, it's getting dark out; we should just go home…"

"Fine"

The rest of the way was quiet.

The light of the porch was on, and shadows moved behind the kitchen window. Shikamaru opened the door and welcomed his guest. The traditional house style made Neji feel less uncomfortable.

"I'm back" the host shouted and the sound of footsteps announced his mother's presence.

"Hey, sweetie" she said, crossing the door-frame and reaching the lobby "Oh, Neji-kun, welcome"

"Sorry to be intruding, Yoshino-san" he said politely.

"Don't worry. I made food for a bunch" she answered smiling.

The guest took off his sandals and reminded quiet, looking at his bare feet.

"Mom…" Shikamaru looked at her seriously "Neji is going to spend the night, ok?"

"Of course…I will go get the guest room ready"

"No mom"

The brunet woman noticed the weird look in her son's face and waited. Someway she already knew it was something he preferred not talking about. Yoshino crossed her arms in her chest and waited patiently.

"Neji is going to sleep with me in my room"

So there was a weird silence and she uncrossed her arms looking at her son.

"Should I get a futon?"

"I don't know it depends on how Neji and I will feel about being apart"

"I beg your pardon?" the woman looked at him disoriented.

Neji tapped on his forehead, premeditating the weird conclusion Yoshino-san was about to have, distorting her son's words. Shikamaru watched his mom's face without guessing that.

"What?"

"Are you going to _sleep_together?"

"I just said that I don't know yet"

"Shikamaru-" Neji was cut in the middle of his statement.

"Hey young man, you know the rules of this house. You never brought someone to spend the night, not even Ino-chan or Temari-san!" she stated almost angrily "Nothing personal, Neji sweetheart"

Shikamaru was speechless, glaring at his mother with a strange look.

"Yoshino-san, it's not what you're thinking…" Neji started.

"Yeah, I know this cliché. Been there done that"

"Mom-"

"You should have warned us you were seeing someone!"

"Mom, don't!"

"I know it's kind of different, and your father will be really upset about not having grandchildren, but we love you just the way you are, and we will support your relationship-"

"Mom, stop it!"

"Oh baby, it must have been hard for you-"

"Yoshino-san, I think you're misunderstanding the situation-"

"Neji, you're a Hyūga, it must have been terrifying for you to be through that" her expression of pity making him wants to vomit.

_Merciless fate of mine._

"Mom, quit the bullshit!" Shikamaru shouted, making his mother widen her eyes.

"Yoshino-san it's not like that at all"

"Yeah, we're not a couple, we're bonded by a failed chakra experiment, if we are separated we almost die in pain, so please stop with this nonsense!"

She looked at him with blank eyes, then turned around and went into the kitchen:

"You should have said that from the beginning, Shikamaru"

He tapped strong on his forehead and looked at the Hyūga.

"I'm so sorry, Neji, I told you she's insane"

"She looks like what a mother should be"

And Shikamaru felt like a hand was pressing inside his chest. Neji's mother died in his childbirth, and there he was complaining about his own mother.

_Goddamn it!_

"Yeah, you'll get use to her…"

-x-

It was a huge bed. Not just that, it was completely exaggerated for a single person. Of course with this big thing in the middle of the room, there was just a tiny space to put a futon in the floor, and it could be worse than sharing the king-sized mattress with Shikamaru. So Neji just nodded and said for him it was ok since they maintained _the distance_.

"Sure" Shikamaru opened the closet, looking for pajamas.

Neji took off his robe, and waited with his trousers on. Then the other handled him a smooth pajama, taking off his own clothes and shoving it on the floor to dress just a grey t-shirt and fall on the bed. The Hyūga saw Shikamaru turn his back to him, making he feel a little less uncomfortable to put the pajamas on.

"Left or right?" He asked getting into the sheets still giving his back to him.

"Don't matter"

The Hyūga took a deep breath and changed the trousers feeling weird, he was not used to change clothes in front of anyone, not even in his missions, so he fasten the strings of the black pajama and prepared himself to feel even worst. Turning around he noted that the brunet was just wearing the t-shirt and black boxers, closed eyes and his hair down spreading in the white pillow. He has never saw Shikamaru's hair that way, loosen nicely, black messy locks all around his sleepy face.

He lay down, feeling the amazing mattress on his back, so different from his futon, and allowed himself to feel the peace of being in a really good and expensive bed.

"Shikamaru, why do you have such a big bed if you never sleep with someone else?"

The man sighed with joy, putting his hands under his head.

"It was the first thing I bought all by myself… I wanted a good bed as I enjoy sleeping…"

"Hm…"

"And in fact I did sleep with someone else, the old lady just doesn't know about it" he grinned, and Neji felt something odd over his body, he wasn't the kind of person that likes to talk about intimacy subjects.

"You must be good at lying" he teased, trying to kill the annoyance with his words.

"No, I'm good at hiding"

"It's the same" he insisted.

"No, it's not"

"So you lied when she asked about bringing guests to spend the night?"

"No, it was true. I didn't bring anyone to spend the night."

Neji didn't ask for any explanation, he was not comfortable talking about sex. So he just closed his eyes and enjoyed the bed, pushing down all the weird waves of nuisance. There were a lot of things to do in the next day, he needed to rest a little bit…

So someone knocked at the door and spread it open, making him almost jump on the bed and sat still, back on the headboard. Yoshino's lovely eyes pointed at them kindly and smiled through the door-frame.

"It makes me feel so nostalgic" she murmured, bringing a futon and putting it on the table beside the door. Then she started to take the clothes off the floor, folding it and putting on the chair, appreciating how well organized Neji's clothes were near the bed "Shikamaru and Choji used to sleep like this when they were younger" she explained to a blushing Hyūga.

"Mom, please!" the younger squawked, putting the pillow over his face like a spoiled child.

"Don't be ashamed, Shikamaru. It was a good time, and I could hear you two speaking through the night… Such a peaceful lulling sound… and the morning after Ino would wake you both up screaming… Inoichi never allowed her to spend the night, as protective as always…"

"Mom, Neji sure doesn't want to listen stupid old stories, we need to rest, tomorrow will be a long day!" the pillow muffled his voice.

Neji totally agreed with that, but he said nothing, looking at his hands stroking the sheet's fabric systematically. God, he wanted so badly to die, or to lost all his memories of this day and never ever remember all this nonsense…

_She's not seeing me just wearing Shikamaru's pajamas, she is not, and it's just a nightmare… Oh, stupid fate of mine!_

"Fine! Have sweet dreams, boys" she said happily "Neji, if you felt uncomfortable or this lazy bones starts kicking you during the night you can take this futon" Yoshino indicated said futon with her chin "And, Shikamaru" her gaze turning to her son before closing the door "If I hear some weird sound, I'll never thrust you anymore, with or without grandchildren"

"MOM!" she grinned at him and closed the door before a ball of socks struck it. "Oh dear lord, she's a complete troublemaker, shameless woman…"

The other didn't answer, his cheeks were red and his eyes closed. Well maybe she wasn't exactly what a mother should be, but she was a good woman. Then he started breathing again and listened to the "click" of lights turning off. He opened his eyes and narrowed them to the ceiling, noticing that Shikamaru was seeking for a more comfortable position, putting his hand down the pillow and shoving his leg out of the sheets, showing some well-defined muscles.

Neji felt his stomach jump, he yearned and tried to concentrate about something else – like the white sheets, or the messy bed-table, but it was weird, he couldn't sleep like that. Fine, so he would spend nine nights or so without sleep.

_God, I'm an obnoxious brat!_

"Neji?"

"Hm?"

"If you want we can talk about tomorrow" he said turning on his shoulder and facing the older man.

Neji accepted the idea.

"We can sleep all morning, that way we don't need to think much about this troublesome bond, then we wake up and go straight to the Hokage's Tower"

_Lazy bones._

"We should wake up at 8AM and try by ourselves to find another solution to this bond" Neji stated.

"You're right. But it's too troublesome…" Shikamaru was staring at the ceiling with the light of the moon touching his bare legs over the sheets, his feet stroking the smooth textile and teeth biting his bottom lip in a thoughtful expression. "How did I do it?"

"We will find out tomorrow, for sure"

"I hope so… For me it's not comfortable either" he muttered, trying to be sincere "I know it's my home, but as you already discovered I have a crazy old lady freaking me out"

His concerned tone made Neji smile, a wave of warmth feeling bringing him some peace again, with his back on the hard wood of the headboard, and his head on the cold wall.

"She's funny" he decreed, eyes lost in thoughts and a velvet and smooth voice that made the other man look at him from the pillow.

"She can be pretty scary when she's pissed" he said smiling, eyes memorizing that cool ghost smile in the jounin's lips.

"We should sleep" Neji laid down again, turning to his left giving face to face with the other in a weird situation. White eyes scrutinizing dense black locks concealing Shikamaru's eyelashes.

"Oh, that's a good one" he said jokingly, closing his eyes in a slow movement.

Neji hummed and went silent again. He could barely feel his body with this stickiness all over it while observing the man's face; it was odd to sleep with him in a nice bed, not in a sleeping bag or a tent, feeling the gentle heat of the bedspread touching his body…

_Fuck! Think about this like a mission. _

Maybe, in the middle of the night he could finally sleep, induced by the comfort, but who knows when he would guard down and just relax on the warm mattress?

"Don't worry, tomorrow we will explain everything to your uncle, he will understand that it's my fault." The other said with a sleepy tone.

"Hm, so tomorrow is fated to be a better day" he answered, turning around on his right shoulder.

"Fated, uh?" Shikamaru said into the pillow, muffling his voice "Troublesome, Hyūga"

"Indeed, Nara."

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><p><strong>-TBC- <strong>

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><p><strong>AN: **uff . too much trouble, poor boys :P well, hope you like it! **Reviews** are always welcome! It would be nice to hear what do you think about this first chapter and what do you think that will happen with our bonded boys ^^

Again, **Rayne**, this is for you, for making me understand that we need to put our hearts in any single word we write ^^. **Akira-nii** if you had not taught me to love yaoi this fic would never exist! **U. May-nee**, thanks for reading this over my shoulder in the and helping to not be too OOC :P

**Love, love & love.**

**See you next chapter! \o/**

(sorry the vocab and grammar ;_;)**  
><strong>

**Tai xxxx**


	2. Crazier than they thought

**Disclaimer: **I don't own **Naruto**, otherwise** ShikaNeji **would be canon.

**A/N: **I have no f*king idea about acupuncture, so I hope Internet didn't deceive me with its information. If there is any mistake or wrong concept about it I truly apologize! ^.^ Hope you enjoy this 5.444 words!

_**Warning:**_ Crazy!Hanabi :P

**BETA: ****SpyYoung****, **Sweetie thanks for the speed and dedication! I'm really glad I have you on my heels to help me with my pitiless English! *-*

* * *

><p><strong>.<strong>

**When Shadows Surround You**

-x-

_Chapter Two_

**Crazier than they thought**

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><p>Lights surrounded his senses, waking him up softly. The warm blankets were tangled around his waist, hair messing over his neck and shoulders, feeling the cool breeze coming from the window and then he opened his eyes. His lashes slowly moving, eyelids beating until his retinas got used to the bright light.<p>

Moving smoothly he stretched his firm body, hands grabbing the woody headboard, pointing his toes out of the sheets and yawning silently, staring at the ceiling. He could hear the birds in the forest down the lane, and the peaceful breathing close to him.

Neji turned on his left shoulder, facing the lazy expression in Shikamaru's face, really close. He could see the tanned skin and its tiny imperfections, his straight nose, the strong line of his jaw, thick eyelashes in a dark brown shade – almost black - and his thin pink lips gently curved…

The older closed his eyes, inwardly asking himself why he was noticing those details. Then he just waited for almost one hour, sat in the bed thinking about the stupid bond till it was eight o'clock.

_Time to wake up!_

He bowed his body, waving his hair away from the man's face and cleared his throat with a velvet sound.

"Nara" he whispered, not wanting to scare his comrade "Wake up…"

But the other not even moved.

_Come on!_

"Shikamaru!" he said aloud, sounding hoarsely.

"Hm…"

"It's eight already, wake up"

Shikamaru didn't move a finger. Neji sighed impatiently, touching Nara's shoulder in a soft intent of awakening, but it was not enough.

_Lazy bones…_

"Nara" he muttered approaching his lips to the shell of his ear "Wake up" he said firmly.

"Hm…"

What was Shikamaru's problem? Really? He felt his impatience take control and decided to get ready while the Chūnin kept with his laziness. Standing up, he looked through the window and noticed the calm sight, enjoying the nice view of a different part of Konoha that he didn't know.

The man started to change his clothes, taking off the t-shirt, folding it in an automatic movement and doing exactly the same with his trousers. His body felt good when the mild breeze beat gently on his bare chest, touching his muscles like a cold breath. Then he put on his sparing trousers, ran his fingers through his black hair, and tightening the knot of the bandage on his forehead, hiding his old seal.

"Good morning" the rough voice sounded sleepy, making Neji feel his muscles get tensed under his skin.

"Morning…"

He put on his typical robe and tied it on his chest firmly.

"What time is it?"

Shikamaru didn't even listened what he said minutes ago.

"Ten past…"

"Troublesome…" he muttered, rolling under the sheets and stretching his body in a lazy move that caught the elder's attention in the corner of his eyes.

Ten minutes later Shikamaru was dressing up into his Chūnin uniform tediously. He was slow, but Neji controlled himself so as to not rush his host. They walked through the hallway to the bathroom in the same odd situation as the night before: one standing outside the door, while the other used the toilet.

"We should have slept all morning" Shikamaru muttered after almost two hours of trying to think together of a new way to break their chakra bond.

"I'll active my Byakugan again, so we will do a map of the chakra points which are more strongly bonded and take it to the Hokage"

Nara nodded and waited.

Neji brushed his finger on his lips and murmured the jutsu. Strong veins appeared around his eyes, making him look mad. Then the white orbs started to map Shikamaru's body, from his toes to his high ponytail, stopping carefully at his abdomens, chest and head, memorizing the powerful points that were extremely bonded.

"Okay" he muttered, "Take note: horizontal zones T2, T3, T4, then T10 and T11, and…" he stopped, looking upset to Shikamaru's waist.

"What?"

"S2 and S3"

Nara wrote in his small notebook and glanced the Jounin, waiting for whatever he should say to take notes.

"Which means that the Heart Meridian points, and…" he huffed.

"And what? Stop freaking me out!"

"Point CV1 and CV2" he said in a hoarse tone.

"Ok. Can you explain me what's the meaning of all this numbers and capital letters?"

"Acupuncture points. Horizontal and meridian versions"

"And the meaning of each one of those points is…?"

"Let's skip that part ok? It's difficult to understand without a body map or a skeleton"

Shikamaru sighed uneasily. What the fuck was happening there? Neji looked stressed, his Byakugan still on mapping his body searching for something else.

"Neji…" his voice sounded concerned "What's happening?"

He didn't answer.

"Hyūga, I'm not kidding, you're scaring me"

"I can assure you I'm more scared than you"

"Then tell me what's going on!"

Neji deactivated his doujutsu and stared at the other man.

"Shikamaru, I'm not sure, we better go see Tsunade-sama"

"But it's half past ten! She will not meet us yet."

"We can always say that this is hurting us and it's an emergency"

"And is it an emergency?" he asked carefully.

"I think so."

"Troublesome, and why the hell are you sparing me the truth?"

"Just..." Neji breathed slowly, closing his eyes and massaging his temples "Just trust me, its better like this."

Nara glared at him, trying to discover something in his blank expression. Maybe it was better like this, not knowing while it wasn't sure.

_Stupid brat!_

"Fine. Let's go then"

-x-

Neji's head was running fast, looking for meanings he couldn't even imagine in his creative mind. It was like being blind and yet seeing everything...an odd sensation he had never felt in his entire life. He could see the chakra points, understand its strength but he wasn't able to understand why those points!

_Crap!_

It was insane, the fucking awkward feeling running down his spine; he couldn't structure a plan or prepare himself for the possible meaning. And he was protecting Shikamaru in an egoistic way, it wasn't to spare him, it was so as to not make the problem real.

So, when Tsunade received them in her office and made them sit and wait for Kakashi, Neji thought he was going to die, because the copy-nin would for sure to be late and he was already impatient.

"Can we start without him?"

"No, Neji, we can't"

"Fuck, I really need a fag…"

"The window is there" she said her eyes still in the scroll she was reading and Shikamaru made a blank expression. Tsunade didn't like cigarettes and she didn't say to him to watch his mouth.

_Great, now I'm even more stressed!_

He stood up and took three steps, before looking at the other shinobi.

"Can you come closer, Neji?"

"I don't appreciate smoking, thanks"

"C'mon!"

"I said no!" his rough voice sounded angry.

"Fuck, Hyūga! I've went all morning without a cigarette, ok!"

"So? Spend your noon without one too"

"Fuck you!"

"Shikamaru…" Tsunade's voice was far away, mixed with her thoughts.

Neji was pouting, looking at him irreducible, his white eyes containing a mean air, almost sadistic and happy.

"Fine, I will walk, anyway"

"No you won't"

"MY ASS, HYUUGA!"

"Yes, really close to your ass, Nara!"

"What the hell are you talking about, you freak!"

"Shut up, Nara. I'm not in mood to your childish quarrel"

"FUCK!"

"Stop it!" the Fifth said harshly.

Shikamaru was not in the mood to wait Neji change his mind, so he started walking, two more steps.

"Don't start, Nara"

"Then, please, cooperate!"

"I don't like cigarettes, and I'm not going to breathe your fucking smoke"

"Bollocks! I'm done with this." And then he stepped again, looking sarcasticly to the older man "You're sure you're not going to cooperate?"

"Yes. And I'm stronger than you against the pain, so you lose."

"Troublesome! Tsunade-sama, can I smoke here? I'm just three steps away from the window"

"Will you shut up?"

He nodded.

"Go ahead and stop yelling in my office."

"Thanks" he said and looked at the other with a sarcastic grin.

Shikamaru took the pack of cigarettes out of his pocket and lit one up, feeling the bitter taste in his tongue and down his respiratory system, filling his lungs in a satisfactory drag. He breathed calm and looked at the view from the Hokage's tower.

_It is going to be a big shit if we don't find a way to break the stupid bond..._

Kakashi arrived late but not too late, it was quarter past twelve and he looked friendly with his hentai book in hands, greeting with his low voice.

"Now we can talk. Did you discover anything else?" the Hokage asked.

"There are strong chakra points bonded" announced Neji with an almost sad expression.

"Which are…?"

Shikamaru took his notebook off his pocked and started reading:

"T2, T3 and T4. Then S2 and S3… Wait…" he turned the page and Neji closed his eyes disturbed "So are Heart Meridian points and CV1 and CV2"

"Conception Vessel 1 and 2?" Tsunade blinked at them "You sure, Neji?"

"I think so…"

"Can anybody explain me why are you so concerned about those two points?" Shikamaru asked tediously.

Kakashi scratched his nape.

"I thought for sure Iruka taught you about this…"

"But I can't remember" he stated starting to become impatient.

"So-" Kakashi started.

"Shikamaru, all those points are important, they have different kinds of energy depending on the chakra you're talking about. What in this case are the first, second and fourth."

"Which means…?"

"Vital energy chakra, sentimental chakra, and heart chakra."

"And why exactly are you freaking out?"

"What Tsunade is trying politely to explain is that those chakras are not what we were expecting" Kakashi said in a slow pace, preparing for the bomb "But let's make it less polite and easier to understand-"

"Kakashi, spare us the debauched part, please" the Hokage asked, fingers tapping her temples.

"Sure" he made a mop "The first chakra is about the energy we receive from the earth by our feet, it's our connection with the nature and our instincts, is about wanting to live"

"Hm..."

"The second is-"

"Quit the graphic part, Kakashi"

"I know" he pouted "It's about sex. Give and receive pleasure and love"

Shikamaru was still looking at him like it was nothing, because he couldn't understand what was so troublesome in being attached with someone else by this stupid chakra, was not like they were going to have some kind of sex disability after the bond, was it?

"So…?"

"It's so bonded, that is reflecting in your solar plexus and because of this you feel pain in your guts" Neji made it faster "And the third chakra which is the solar plexus is about human connection, and is where the pain is reflecting."

"Fine and the fourth?"

"Fine?" Neji asked, getting mad "Are you listening to me?"

"Yes, our sexual chakra and rational one are bonded, and then what?"

Shikamaru faced the other man, looking for some weird shit he didn't know yet or something like this.

"You win!" Neji said, hiding his face in his palms.

"The fourth is ok, is about being open and love the other human beings, and about ego, but let's skip that part." Kakashi opened his stupid book again.

"Did you try to break it again?"

"Yes, it keeps the same pain, no more, no less."

Neji was still keeping his face hidden and breathing lazily, calming down.

_What is wrong with Shikamaru? Why doesn't he understand the creepy fact that we're bonded by almost four different chakras, one of them the most animalistic in the whole human body?_

"Kakashi, you should take the boys to the Hyūga compound, I want Hiashi to look at this mess."

He agreed and put his book in the pocket of his Jounin waistcoat.

"Yesterday we sent one of Kakashi's dog-nin's to look for your father, Shikamaru, and then maybe tomorrow we will have some news about how long it will take him to comeback from the mission"

"Thanks, Tsunade-sama" Neji said politely.

-x-

"Interesting…"

"Interesting?"

"I've never saw something like this before"

The grave voice of the Hyūga leader sounded really concerned about what he was seeing. He spent at least thirty minutes just watching them, their chakras and its vibrations after other half an hour of explanation.

"Hiashi-sama, do you have any idea how to break it, or at least release it?"

"Just hypothesis" he answered, quitting his doujutsu and looking at them "I should speak with the elders first, maybe they have more information than I have."

"Thank you, Hiashi-sama"

"Let's go inside and have a cup of tea" he said politely.

They went out of the sparing dojo and walked through the compound. Kakashi excused himself and left, leaving the young men with the old Hyūga.

"Again, what exactly were you doing when it happened?" he asked, taking off his sandals and entering in the main house.

"Neji was helping me to understand my chakra flux while I was using it"

"Neji, did you make any kind of sympathetic assimilation?"

The young Jounin felt his guts revolve. He did it. He fucking did it!

"Yes, sir"

"How was it?"

They sat in the traditional living room, around the tea table and waited for a servant to serve the tea.

"I just expanded my chakra through Shikamaru's shadows and tried to understand the flux from each chakra"

"And how did you do the dissimilation?"

"Dissimilation?"

"Yes, Neji, dissimilation" He felt the strong gaze on him, the hair of his nape ruffling in a kind of fear he didn't feel for a long time.

"I just made my way back"

"So, what you're trying to say is that you did a profound chakra reading and you just came out, as nothing?"

"I'm sorry, sir"

Shikamaru could hear in the low tone of his comrade the fear, the feudatory movements in his bowed head, his hair hiding his expression and his clenched fists pressing his knees.

"It's nothing to be sorry about, Hiashi-sama" Nara intervened, feeling bad about all that stuff "I was doing the same, and in a moment it looked like we had the same chakra, and it was then when I couldn't retract it…" he explained patiently "I could release it a little, so Neji could move by himself, but it kept us together by some steps…"

"Understandable…"

"I'm very sorry, uncle"

"Lift your head, Neji. It's just another lesson now that it's done. Live with it and learn from it."

The servant arrived with the tea and the drumming of steps over the corridor distracted them, looking at the newcomer. It was a skinny girl with long dark hair tied in a loose braid. She walked in shuffling footsteps, but when she saw her cousin the girl grinned happily.

"Hanabi-sama" Neji bowed in respect.

"Nii-chan! I was looking for you yesterday! What's up?"

"Look with your own eyes and tell me what you see" the strong voice of the clan leader sounded harsh.

"Yes, father" she activated her Byakugan fast and looked at her cousin, her eyes widened when her gaze turned to Shikamaru "For fuck's sake!"

"Hanabi!" her progenitor warned.

"What the _fuck _ is that?"

"What did I say about this vulgar words of yours, daughter?"

"But, look at them, father, it's just…_ abnormal_!"

"Indeed…" Shikamaru took a sip of his tea, thoughtfully. He would like to see what they were seeing; it would the easier to understand what was so wrong in it.

"Shikamaru-san, sorry, I'm being impolite. Do you remember me?"

"Of course I do. Nice to see you again, Hanabi-chan" he said in his bored style.

She went red in a minute and Neji huffed. As always, Hanabi loved to be noted by his friends and comrades, it was a big problem considering his pubescent cousin and a fair taste for men.

_Thanks Kami, now she will flirt with him!_

The girl sat beside Shikamaru and served a cup of tea.

"Father, what is this chakra distortion about?" she asked occasionally, making Shikamaru look at her preoccupied.

"Distortion you say?"

"Or disequilibrium, however is it named."

"It's neither of that, Hanabi. It's chakra fusion."

"Chakra fusion?" the three young repeated.

"Shit" Shikamaru cursed after pouring his tea in his lap. "Sorry for my bad language, sir" he said faster, making Neji grin in satisfaction.

"I think it's a fusion, but I will need a Hyūga medic-nin and one of the elders to be sure."

"What did you do to create this fusion?" the girl asked looking demonically curious "_Tantric sex_?"

"Hanabi! Quit the sex talk already!" her father ordered harshly.

Neji was deeply concerned, and he would love to kill his beloved cousin in that moment; he could feel the heat in his cheeks and sweat in his palms. But Shikamaru just widened his eyes, jaw dropping in a funny expression that would have made the jounin laugh in other moment.

"I wish it was that, Hanabi-chan" he stated after the shock "Then at least it would be understandable and-"

"Shut up, Nara" Neji hissed embarrassed with the stupid subject.

"I will look for that med-nin and one of the elders" Hiashi said with his stoic expression "Will you sleep here tonight?"

"Yes, Hiashi-sama, if we're not here we will be in my place"

Shikamaru frown his brow, he didn't know Neji lived in another house…it must be that stupid thing about the Hyūga hierarchy. So he looked at Hanabi, he remembered that she was just sixteen or so, and the huge difference in personality between she, her older sister and Neji was striking. He couldn't understand why, but she was another kind of Hyūga, for sure.

_Maybe she's the only normal person in the clan…if it can be considered as normal…_

Hiashi disappeared in the hallway and Hanabi smiled at him, her legs crossed and her hands bearing the weight of her body.

"Sorry Neji…" he said dismayed, in fact he shouldn't have kept the conversation in that way.

"Hanabi, you should stop doing this in front of you father" he ignored Shikamaru.

"As if I'm afraid of him…" she grinned at her cousin "What? Are you afraid of him?"

_What the hell are they talking about?_

Shikamaru watched the discussion, wondering how good friends both of them were. Neji was more relaxed and the girl was smiling softly. Maybe they had an incestuous relationship…

_No way! Neji has a stick up his ass; he wouldn't skip the rules and all the Hy_ū_ga bullshit._

"I was enjoying the conversation, Neji; until you scolded him…what were you going to say, Shikamaru?"

"Eh… I don't remember"

"I think you were going to say that it would be easier to understand and accept this bond after really good sex!"

"Hanabi!" Neji went really red and Shikamaru frowned again.

"What are you playing at, Hanabi-chan? Are you trying to pair us up?"

"No, she's trying to seduce you!" Neji said receiving a punch in his shoulder.

"I'm not!"

"Yes you are! You always do things like this, not all men like listening to your perverted ideas, so stop the bullshit!"

Shikamaru wanted to stop the world and memorize this moment: Hyūga Neji, acting all friendly and, at the same time, concerned with his cousins reputation.

"But it's not your problem, Nii-chan!"

"It will be if Hiashi-sama discovers that you flirt with all my comrades, and that you enjoy older men, and that you're a little perverted brat!"

Shikamaru stared at them, was it a joke? Was it serious?

"Fine, don't tell him and we are ok. Now, _Shika-kun_" she said in a childish tone "Didn't you enjoy my idea?"

"Your idea?" he seemed confused.

"Yes, do you know that the Hyūga just make tantric sex?"

"Hanabi!"

"What? I know you like rough sex too, but the tantric style is a Hyūga thing!"

Neji tapped his brow and stood up. Shikamaru started to feel dizzy.

Fuck, it was too cool to be a Hyūga conversation. They were talking about _Hy__ū__ga_ sex style, and he was wondering how the fuck this girl was so open, in fact now he could understand why Neji looked concern about his cousin.

"Come on, Shikamaru, let's go out of here"

"Wait, Neji. Does this kid always talk like this?" he asked, strategizing a way to make her stop this sex talk because he couldn't handle it.

"Of course I do" she said proud of herself.

"Hanabi-chan, why don't you order another tea, I would like to stay a little longer, if it doesn't bother you…" Nara asked politely.

Neji sent him a homicidal look, but he didn't retract. The girl grinned and disappeared in the hallway.

"What the hell, Shikamaru?"

"Why are you so concerned about her?"

"Family stuff. Not your business"

"C'mon I can try to help you"

"I'm not talking about my young cousin with you…"

"Don't be stubborn!"

Neji sighed, trying to understand the sudden interest of the Nara in Hanabi. Then he thought that it wouldn't get worse if the subject was the perverted girl.

"Fine…Hanabi is on the top list to be the future clan leader, she is strong and intelligent, but her hormones are a big trouble…she's is crazy and never stops talking about sex. She's only sixteen and if you ask the jounin headquarters about her at least seven shinobi are going to grin viciously at you…if Hiashi-sama discovers it, not just her future, but her status in the clan would be in danger." He snorted "You know some Hyūga, we try to be polite and quiet, we never talk about our private life, but this young brat is totally mad, she speaks like this all the time, with everyone…"

_Now I see the danger._

"Neji, can I make her desire that she had never started this subject?"

"Be my guest" he sat again "If you can…"

When Hanabi came back with a hot pot of tea, she looked curious at them and smiled like a wild cat, her grin was too perverted for a girl at her age.

_Mad girl, she doesn't even know me!_

"So…" Shikamaru smiled at her in a sexy way that Neji never imagined he could "Do you want to talk about sex, Hanabi-sama?"

His rough voice made both Hyūga shivered. Neji asked himself what the fuck was he allowing, but then a smooth and warm voice made him look graciously at the chūnin:

"_Hanabi-sama_, you shouldn't play with fire, you know? Not all men will think you're just chatting with them...they will want…more than this"

She laughed.

"Stop it. You're not going to convince me like this."

Shikamaru smiled back.

"If you want I can play the bad boy to you" his eyes shone with fire and Neji caught himself wondering how mean the Nara could be.

"Yeah, bad boys are always the good ones at teasing" she joked.

"Hm, mainly when they are just chat-mates. But they can hurt you, in a way you would not like at all"

She stared at him.

"I'm talking about mean boys who like to destroy others reputation, talking about you and your perv talk in the jounin and chūnin headquarters. Whispering how teasing Hanabi-sama is when she talks about sex…telling secrets about the Hyūga sex style…dirty frames of the future leader of this strong clan…"

She went really still, looking at her hands concerned.

"Maybe, you were lucky till now, but who knows when one of them will get drunk and start talking about what you talk about with their friends? Would you like to not have a boyfriend in the future because your bad reputation is too much to handle?"

"Shikamaru…" Neji warned, watching his cousin blush to no end.

"You're beautiful Hanabi, but you should respect yourself, otherwise you will be just a silly girl in a real man's eyes. They will see you as a pitiless young girl that tried to tease them without thinking about the repercussions."

Neji was dizzy, Shikamaru was a really good strategist, he didn't even know her, but caught her essence at a glance. He had tried everything, but she would never listen to him, maybe it was true: sometimes you need to listen from a stranger to have it finally sink in.

"If you want to talk about sex, your welcome to and try to flirt with me, I'm not easy to convince, so I can entertain you during a long ride till you reach me" he said finally "Wanna try?"

She blinked, and then blushed.

"Thank you, Shikamaru-kun..." she said politely.

"And if you wanna know, I would be glad if you show me this tantric Hyūga style when you grow up" he grinned making her widen her eyes nervously and blush even more. "Or maybe you would like to see me learning it with your cousin…"

She covered her mouth looking at both boys in a spoiled way that almost made Shikamaru laugh. Neji was as red as a tomato, but at least he was glad Nara did all this bullshit.

"Oh…er…well…I think I will give you a break, enjoy your tantric sex- I mean, your weird connection"

And then she left running, her hand still covering her mouth.

"Sorry about the last part, it was just to relax our mood" the chūnin sip his tea calmly.

"I would pay to see her disconcerted like this again. You're welcome to come over whenever you want" and then he looked at the young man and grinned.

"Nice to hear it" he smiled simply.

And Shikamaru felt he could enjoy the bond and their friendship until they discover a solution.

-x-

After the weird situation in the Hyūga main house, they went to Neji's place, it was in the compound, and it was a really traditional and big house. It had shoji doors and tatami mats, everything was completely tidy and clear with light white walls and bamboo furniture. The living room was huge and it had a kotatsu, what made Shikamaru smile, he loved kotatsus since he was a child, it use to give a warm style to the houses.

"Nice place!"

Neji hummed and made their way in a fast tour, showing the kitchen, the porch and the small garden behind the house. They came back into the house and walked close through the large hallway, it had four rooms and the last one was Neji's.

It was big and Shikamaru looked stunned at the tidiness of the main suite. A great futon was set bellow the large window, the sunset shooting an orange light on it.

"Is not as big as your bed, but I think it will work…we can get a futon from one of the other rooms if you prefer, it's just that mine is the best I have here" he said, fingering his hair and taking off his ribbon, letting those dark locks run free in his shoulders and back, looking good loose.

Shikamaru smiled, Neji was being really nice since the episode in Hiashi's house, he was glad and they laugh together on their way to his house, talking about Hanabi's expressions. It established a smooth sensation between them, they were fine now, and Neji didn't bother him when he lit up a cigarette during their small walk to the house.

"My turn to ask a question, why do you have such a big house if you live alone – or maybe you normally bring someone to spend the night?" he joked, following his host till the kitchen to make the dinner.

"It was my father's house, since I became a chūnin it's mine"

_Fuck! Do not ask obvious things, genius! Think before you speak!_

"Sorry, Neji"

"It's ok" his lips moved in an almost smile, but faded before becoming a real smile "I'm a bad cook, normally Hinata helps me with the cooking, or just invites me to eat in the main house, but she's in mission and I don't want to have dinner with Hanabi after this afternoon"

"I can cook. Not that I'm a good cooker, but it's not that bad. What do you want to eat?"

It had been a while since he last cooked, it made him remember his vacation in Suna last year; Temari was a real crappy cook…

"Whatever" Neji answered looking at the fridge "I have a lot of vegetables…Hinata should stop bringing rabbit food to me…" he listened to Shikamaru's laugh and looked at him "What?"

"You look so normal that it's weird"

Neji snorted.

"Shut up!"

Nara could see this time the ghost smile playing in the jounin lips. It was simple and not very excited, but was something he liked to see.

"Stop looking at me like I'm a freak" he said, threatening to shove a tomato at him.

"No shit! Hyūga Neji, playing with food!"

"Fuck you, Nara"

"Troublesome, he's saying bad words too. Oh Hyūga, you're a mean boy…" Shikamaru couldn't contain the laugh.

"I will kill you if you don't stop now!"

"I'm not scared of you, Neji; you're threatening me with a tomato!"

The Hyūga moved fast, and in a blink of his eyes, Shikamaru was being pressed against the counter. Neji was pointing the stupid tomato at Nara's forehead, his free hand grabbing the chūnin vests, a provocative grin in his lips and danger shining in his eyes.

Shikamaru stopped laughing, not because he was afraid of the tomato attack, but because the joy in this stupid joke made his chest twist weirdly.

_What the fuck?_

Their faces were an inch of distance, the nice feeling of the approximation made him groan softly and it caught Neji's attention, his eyes focusing on Shikamaru's lips and holding a second there.

Then he loosened his grip and the tomato rolled on the counter, but they were still close enough to feel each other's warm breath.

What were they playing at?

Shikamaru stared at those pearly eyes, still focused in his face, inexpressive as a rock, he couldn't read it. He was free to go, to move away from the jounin and drop the intense gaze, but he didn't want to, he wanted to discover who Hyūga Neji really was, how human and normal he could be, and he wanted to know that by looking at those beautiful white eyes...

_Neji..._

In a fast move Neji was far away again, he gave three steps reaching the kitchen's back door and opened it quickly.

"Toku?" he asked to the wind, and one second after a man showed at the door in the dusky light.

"Neji" the sweet tone made Shikamaru get tense.

Hyūga Tokuma was standing in the door frame, one of his hips leaning in the wooden frame and his arms crossed in his chest. Shikamaru felt odd, the man looked as he was in his own house and it pointed to Nara that the Hyūga shinobi was used to the house, and even more used to the owner of the house.

His evil smile didn't fit his voice at all, but he stayed there, just looking at his relative, eyes seeing through Neji in a way Shikamaru never saw someone doing.

"Hiashi-sama sent me. Tomorrow you should meet him at eight in the sparring dojo."

"Hm. Thanks, Tokuma. Do you want to come in?"

"No, you have a _guest_ tonight, don't wanna bother you two and I'm leaving on as reinforcement in a mission." He gave a sarcastic look at his cousin "Looks like you're in trouble…"

"It's stupid, believe me" he said in a low tone, like it was a secret.

"As if we needed more cages…"

It was an odd silence, they understand each other in a way Shikamaru couldn't do. He felt his stomach jump inside his belly and a weird cold sensation made him bit his lower lip. It was intense inside him, just like the glance both Hyūga were sharing.

"See you around"

"Bye, Toku. Have a safe mission."

"Nice to see you, Nara" he said recklessly.

"Yeah..."

When he left, Shikamaru felt a huge relief, his stomach returned to its normality and he looked at Neji. The man was still there, looking at the back garden in a profound reflection, his lost gaze in the place his cousin was standing seconds ago...and his concern, his blank stare and folly thoughts weren't because of Tokuma's suddenly apparition, it was because he was confused.

_What if he had not appeared?_

Both felt a weird motion down their spine. It sure was going to be crazier than they thought.

_Troublesome…_

-x-

**TBC**

* * *

><p><strong>AN: **It was great fun to write this chapt! Hanabi is _so_ NOT Hyuuga x.X sorry if she's too OOC, but I enjoyed writing her _dirty talk_ a lot. And YES Tokuma is a fucking killjoy, but I really like him** ^_^**

**lo **and** Draches, **I couldn't reply properly your reviews because you were not logged in your account, so **THANK YOU VERY MUCH**! If you see any errors, please let me know and I'll do my best to brush up my English!

I'm SO glad some people add the fic into their Alert and Favs list! I hope to hear from you, the feedback is cotton candy for ficwriter's heart (L), so if you read it and like it, or want to point out some errors or just say I should watch out some OOC character, PLEASE REVIEW IT! I'm happy with favs and alerts, but I would enjoy even more if I can listen to your thoughts!

**Akira-kun,** **Lorien** and **EatEmUp** thanks for the reviews and the warming words of yours!

_IF YOU LIKE IT LET ME KNOW! _

**Love, love & love!**

**Tai xxx**


	3. Not releasing at all!

**Disclaimer: **I don't own **Naruto**, otherwise** ShikaNeji **would be canon.

**A/N: **Canon says Kiba's birthday is in July 7, let's make it some chilly day in November, ok? Hehe ^^

**Beta: SpyYoung **is having some trouble to find enough time to beta this chapter, so I'm daring myself on publishing it without beta work: I truly apologize grammar, spelling and vocab mistakes and whatever errors you can find here, but it's been 20 days without updates and I really wanted to publish this chapter. I read it again and again looking for mistakes, but well I'm not a English native, so I hope you all understand! ^_^ I'll edit it as soon as Spy send me the beta-ed one!

* * *

><p><strong>.<strong>

**When Shadows Surround You**

_-x-_

_Chapter Three_

**Not releasing at all!**

_-x-_**  
><strong>

It was a cold morning; he noticed shivering under the blankets. The window was half open and the cool breeze was definitely announcing the chilly cold of autumn. Shikamaru had a lot of troubles to sleep, his mind was busy and every time he closed his eyes he could feel the heat of Neji's body closer to him than the other night.

He couldn't sleep thinking about what happened in the kitchen, and about their silent dinner - uncomfortable and odd -, remembering sit outside of the bathroom door, smoking and listening to the sound of the shower... Everything was so troublesome he didn't know how long he could stand it.

So, when he woke up and saw Neji watching him, he almost died in embarrassment. He shook his hands in his face, trying to kill that stupid feeling and looked back at the man sitting beside him with a small book in hands.

"What are you reading?"

"Haikus"

Both voices sounded uneasy. Neji's pajama shirt was half unbuttoned and Shikamaru hesitated, looking in a fast eye movement before hiding his face in the pillow again. What was up with him? The Jounin looked cool and fine with their bodies in the same futon, reading with his long silky hair dropping onto his strong chest.

_It's yesterday's fault!_

He needed to watch some clouds and blank his mind with the soft cotton forms. He could still feel yesterday's hypnotic gaze running at his face, stopping in his lips for seconds, not letting him go even when he wasn't grabbing his vests anymore.

It has been a while since he last felt like this, with his lazy body and turbid mind. He stood up and took off the t-shirt Neji borrowed him, exposing his almost naked body without concern; he needed to try himself to know he was still controlling it. Maybe it was because of the bond, yes they were intrinsically bonded, so it must be normal to feel attracted.

Passing his fingers in his messy hair and putting it up into a high ponytail, he could feel Neji's eyes in his back. He turned to confront it. The Hyuuga was still all relaxed with his fucking book climbing in his fingers, his eyes quiet in Shikamaru's tanned skin.

"You can sleep twenty more minutes if you want" he said.

"What time is it?"

"Five to seven"

Shikamaru snorted and sat down again, just in his boxers. He stretched his body on the futon, feeling the matted duvet in his back, and noticing that Neji's eyes were not in his body anymore, he was reading his stupid book again.

_Maybe is not the bond… It's just my _genius_ mind…_

Closing his eyes, he listened the rustle of pages and smiled. He didn't know Neji liked haikus, who would have imagined that? Then the cold made him roll in the futon, curling in the blanket and skimming his bare arm in Neji's covered thigh. He froze and felt the other stay still.

Shikamaru grinned into the pillow. Well, the good part was that maybe like this he would be less preoccupied with the failed jutsu. It was like a game, like playing Shoji with his old man: you never know which pawn will appear in the other's turn. And it was stimulating.

After minutes of laziness both shinobi get dressed and ate something fast, going to their meeting with Hiashi. They were not talk active as last afternoon and the smooth feeling have washed away. When they got there, ten minutes earlier, the three men were already in the sparring dojo.

"Here they are" said the elder with a severe expression "The bonded kids!" he joked with a light scary smile.

_God, I'm afraid now. Old man, where are you? Come back home and save your kid!_

With a brief explanation all Hyūga activated their doujutsu, watching the chakra connection with interest. The elder was almost happy with what he was seeing and Shikamaru desired – for the first time in his life – to be a Hyūga, just to see what was so interesting.

"Wow…" the med-nin said "Exactly what you said, Hiashi-sama. I think it will be hard to break, but we can try to release it."

"Do you see anything else, father?" Hiashi asked politely and Shikamaru looked at the elder. So this man was Hyūga Hideki.

"This second chakra connection will give the boys a little trouble if they felt their hormones…" he said, almost laughing.

Shikamaru didn't understand, but made a mental note to ask Neji about this after.

"And how can we release the bond?" Shikamaru asked in a low tone.

"Chakra point pressure" said the med-nin.

"Which means…?"

Really, he was going to be upset with everybody knowing more than him about that bullshit.

"Using the Gentle Fist like acupuncture needles." The man explained.

"WHAT?" Neji winced, the statement sinking in.

"Neji, don't be childish"

"Sorry, Hideki-sama" he bowed.

"It's normal, you're a proud kid, but is what can be done. If you don't want to release it you don't need to do that." the old man said with a strange smile in his lips.

"And how can it be done?" Shikamaru asked and all men looked at him with a blank expression – in that case Neji was not blank at all, he was pissed.

"Gently pushing the chakra points" the med-nin informed.

"Ah, fine…" then he stared at the man "WHAT?"

Hideki laughed at him, and the other adults were controlling their expression.

_Hell no!_

"And where exactly are those points again?" he asked cautiously, trying to not close his eyes in a pain pout.

"In the perineum, in the base of your penis, and in your chest"

_FUCK NO!_

"And how will we do that?" he asked, his voice barely sounding.

"You will need a Hyūga that know the points and can see it with our kekkei genkai. It can be some med-nin as Hidori or even Neji, as he's your friend maybe you will prefer him to help you." Hideki explained.

"And Neji…?"

"He can take care of himself" Hiashi's voice sounded harsh, as he was punishing his own nephew.

Shikamaru tapped his forehead. Why was this happening to him? What he did wrong to deserve it?

"You have time to think about it, Nara boy, don't push yourself too much" Hideki said a little bit sadistic.

Neji was really pissed. He was feeling the world fall on his shoulders and pushing him down. His grandfather tapped his shoulder gently, as just in sad occasions he would do.

"Be strong, kid. Your father wouldn't do a storm in a teacup."

"Yes, grandfather. I apologize about my behavior"

And with that, the elder and the med-nin went out.

"Hiashi-sama?"

"Yes, Neji"

"I would be glad if Hanabi-sama doesn't know about this situation"

"She will not, I assure you, Neji" and then his eyes went warm "Is the last thing you need now. If you excuse me, Shikamaru, I have some paperwork to do"

He left and Shikamaru started laughing. It was so irrational he couldn't believe it was happening to them. He was shaking, nervous, his palms sweating and his temples in pain.

"We can threaten her about some help!" he joke, still laughing.

"How can you say that in a moment like this, Nara?" Neji's voice was hoarse and mad.

"If I don't I will have a stress attack" he explained, before suddenly stopping laughing, he allow his body to crash onto the tatami and closed his eyes. "I'm not used to be in such stress since the end of the war... It makes me feel sick."

Neji laid down too, side by side with the Chūnin. It wasn't easy for him either. In fact it was way too troublesome, his grandfather and uncle were pushing him, he could sense it, to see how professional and a good Byakugan user he could be. His mind was messy when he heard the footsteps and sat back.

"Hinata-sama, how was the mission?"

"Great… I- I just arrived" she said simple and watched Shikamaru open his eyes lazily "Hi, Shikamaru-kun"

"Hey Hinata, how's everything?"

"Fine" she said smiling "Are you coming after tomorrow night?"

"Where?" Neji asked fast.

"Kiba-kun's birthday party" she looked excited even with her shy eyes.

"Mah… I almost forgot it!" Shikamaru tapped his forehead and sighed at the Jounin "We are going, aren't we?"

"Why should I go?"

Hinata pouted sadly "Nii-san!"

"This boy is a pain in the ass… I don't even like him"

"Neji, we better go to the party" Nara announced, closing his eyes again "Unless you want a pissed Ino breaking into your house and punching us till bleed our lungs out…"

"Why would she do this?"

"She's already bought the present"

"And?"

"It's a team present, isn't it Shikamaru-kun?"

"Exactly, Hinata… And when Ino is upset, she can be worst then my mother."

Neji shivered and they went silent, till Hinata start setting some kunais in a shelf on the wall and Neji watched Nara's face, his full eyelashes, his lazy expression and his hands in fists. Shikamaru wasn't ok, he was stressed, Neji could sense it like energy between them, like a strong exchange of feelings.

_Must be the chakra fusion…_

"We will be there, Hinata-sama" he said softly and she smiled.

-x-

They spent the rest of the morning in a clearing at Nara's forest. Shikamaru introduced Neji to the herd of deer in a joking tone that couldn't hide his jitters. Then the chūnin lay down and watched the clouds passing by in the light blue sky. The Hyūga just sat near him, his back against the trunk of a three and activated his Byakugan, looking the surroundings, the soft movements of the forest, counting birds and thinking about their bond.

His gaze fell to Shikamaru's body, noticing all his chakra points shining lightly. He couldn't understand why their bond was stronger in those stupid spots, but he could see the light movement of energy inside the chūnin's body. It was moving lazily, calm, as nothing was wrong.

"Neji?"

"Hn…"

"Am I overreacting?"

He deactivated his doujutsu and watched Shikamaru's concerned expression, now with closed eyes as if he wanted to hide his messy thoughts.

"Don't think so…"

"Are you... _ok_with that?"

"I'm not good with intimacy, Nara, you know that"

He nodded, eyelashes moving smoothly without opening his lids.

"It's just… Troublesome"

"Yes it is... But... We can wait if you prefer, I think the release will be just some steps, so we can wait your father come back…"

"That stupid old man…"

Neji smiled. It was funny the way Shikamaru talked about his parents. Was nice to see how a normal parental relationship was, out of the Hyūga hierarchy...

He saw the sun in the middle of the sky, feeling the warm touch of it. November seemed a nice month, the autumn mixing the light heat and the smooth cold. Sun and breeze all together.

"We should go have lunch, the crazy woman will want to know about the development of our _situation_" the lazy man stood up, being followed by his bonded comrade "Just… Don't tell her about _how_to release the bond, it's too troublesome, ok?"

The lack of answer made him know that it was unnecessary to ask such an obvious thing.

Yoshino was setting the table, smiling at them and talking about some new gossip of the Nara clan. They sat together and started eating. It was nice, she was a really good mother, or it was the first impression Neji had.

"It's really good, Yoshino-san, thank you for the food" he said politely while eating his rice, chopsticks in hands and a calm expression.

"Thanks, Sweetie. You know, I always wanted to have more children, but Shikaku was too lazy to raise more than one…"

"Mom, don't start"

"Why? I'm happy that now I will have two baby boys during this days" she grinned, drinking her green tea "Neji if you need something just ask, ok?"

"Thank you"

"Mom, we're going to spend the night at Neji's these days"

"Why? I was planning some great food for dinner" she seemed upset.

"We're going to have dinner with Hinata, and after tomorrow its Kiba's birthday, we will be late and Neji want to escort his cousin home."

She looked less concerned and grinned again.

"Fine, but tomorrow you need to come back for lunch, ok? And send greetings to Hinata-chan, she's such a good girl..."

Neji smiled, Hinata always gave a good impression on mothers.

"Ah, mom, Neji has a kotatsu!" Shikamaru said happily "When are you going to set up our kotatsu again? It's been a while since we last use it…"

Neji frowned.

"Do you like kotatsus?" he asked a little bit curious.

"Of course, is warm and you can spend all day lazily"

"Ah"

_Obvious..._

"Lazy bones" the woman muttered "Let's see, when the winter is back we can set it up again. Now enjoy Neji's kotatsu while you can"

"Don't you like kotatsus, Neji?"

"I never used it in fact. Is there because I didn't change much in the house since I've moved in…"

_Fuck, don't talk about things that can make him remember his father, genius!_

But… if he didn't change it, it must be because he wanted to remember his childhood, isn't it?

Shikamaru observed the long haired man eat peacefully. He was almost happy, with those white eyes shining lightly and enjoying his food.

"Ah, you're father sent a message, Shikamaru!"

Both boys stared at her, impatiently.

"Eight nights and he will be back" she said, finishing her food and smiling happily "Dessert?"

-x-

Neji was sitting in the hallway, his haiku book in hands, reading with his back flat on the bathroom door, while Shikamaru took his shower. He was calm, it was a nice afternoon in the Nara's house, but after that they came back to his place; the chūnin brought some clothes in a small bag with him. After a cup of tea watching the dusk in the back porch they decided start to get ready for dinner with Hinata.

The lulling sound of the shower gave him a strange peace, while reading those old haikus and enjoying his moment, finally alone. They have counted steps through the huge bathroom and it worked ok, just like yesterday.

_Yesterday…_

He looked up the book, his gaze lost in the light of the lamp. Yesterday was weird, the stupid numbing feeling when he was looking at Shikamaru's lips, his tanned face, his strong jaw... It was ridiculous and inside his ribs he felt a stroking feeling. If Tokuma hadn't appeared he couldn't even imagine what could have happened, and it was odd! He never let himself be that ruleless... Normally things like this just happened with him when he wanted, when he was sure it wasn't going to create a huge problem and when he set up things on his own way.

_But yesterday..._

Yes, he was feeling nice with Shikamaru, they were fooling around like old friends after the event at Hiashi's house. They were comfortable with each other, smiling and joking. Teasing in a way he didn't remember the last time he did.

So maybe it was the bond.

_Fucking bond... _

And, of course, the stupid wicked grin in Tokuma's lips. That stupid brat, how could he read him so easily? It was an intense gaze, and Neji understood the meaning of that, it was like he was explaining to Neji what he was seeing inside him.

He shook his head and focused on his book again. It was even worst to think about last night.

He turned the page and started a new haiku, drinking the words in a fast move of his eyes. They would be late if Shikamaru didn't rush. Neji had already took his shower, his long wet hair was still dripping on his bare chest and back, his ordinary trousers were unbuttoned and he needed to wait the other man to go back to his room and finish dressing. Hinata would be there in any minute to start cooking dinner together.

He stretched his legs and stood up; preparing to knock the door and make the lazy ninja go out. But then...

"GOD!" he felt his gut and lungs crush painfully. In a lacking move he opened the door, stepped in without thinking and killed the distance that was torturing him. His eyes were cloudy but what he saw make him breathe heavily.

Shikamaru was all naked, his bare body outside the shower - which was still running water - one hand in his upper stomach, eyes shut in pain, his hair dripping on his face and neck, giving him a wild look that almost made Neji snort. There were some scars in his chest and abdomen and in his left thigh...

_Shit! _

Neji felt blush on his cheeks, heat all over his body, his eyes still sketching that bare torso and going down... Shikamaru had a great body, Neji knew that, he was a shinobi after all, but he was also a lazy bastard. Neji couldn't guess that he could have such defined lean muscles under his baggy clothes and it made him feel a strong pressure in his stomach, his mouth going dry and-

_Stop looking! _

So he lifted his eyes, looking at the chūnin's face and discovering that those midnight black irises hold a weird curiosity, and that his orbs were on his face, watching Neji travel across his body. When their gazes connected both of them went even more awkward and looked away with a bashful movement.

"Sorry" they muttered at the same time, surprise making their gazes meet again.

Neji's eyes were out of control and in a last sharp glance he watched Shikamaru take a towel and turn off the tap-shower. The Hyūga turned back and waited; his face almost blushing made him want to die.

"You stepped out of the line" he said in a husky tone, the double meaning in his voice making Shikamaru shiver unguided.

"Living and learning..." he muttered and followed the older man after dressing his boxers and trousers.

-x-

They ate in the kotatsu for Shikamaru's happiness and enjoyed the great food of Hinata's. She cooked damned good and Nara was happy in the warm blanket of the furniture; he was feeling nice and appreciating the chat with the girl about her last mission in Suna, helping Gaara and Temari with some medicine investigation.

"She said she misses you" Hinata told in a low tone, blushing in consequence "And Gaara is always talking about Naruto-kun and Konoha, they really appreciate him..."

Neji didn't say a word about it, but he was calm and eating slowly as he had missed Hinata's food. In a proud manifest he never pronounced a word about the kotatsu, after all he didn't want to take the plunge and say aloud how he was enjoying the warm and homelike feeling he was experiencing. Maybe because it caused him a strange sensation of nostalgia…

When Hinata left, the boys cleaned the kotatsu and the kitchen in silence. They were feeling odd since the bathroom thing...

Neji washed the dishes silently, while Shikamaru put the food in the fridge. It was annoying, he had hoped that after Hinata's visit they would be ok again, but he was wrong. The Hyūga was quiet, saving his thoughts and feelings for himself, not even his eyes made any kind of contact with Shikamaru's.

They decided in a silent nod to go sleep. It would be easier this way, to just turn off their minds and rest in the nice futon. After changing clothes they laid down side by side with a huge gap between their bodies and a tired sensation about keeping with that bullshit bond thing.

Shikamaru's mind was running fast in his brain, his huge IQ being stupid and doesn't letting him cut the flux of thoughts and just sleep. He needed that rest, and to forget about all the kinky situations that were happening to them since the fucking failed jutsu bonded their chakras together.

With all that mess in his brain, after almost an hour and a half chewing those facts he finally fell asleep. It wasn't a sleep without dreams that he could completely relax and turn off his mind, the whirl in his mind never stopping completely, but at least it was a little bit resting. Shikamaru was in a weird state of alert, listening the sounds of the night in the middle of his cloudy dreams about chakra bond and failed jutsus, when he heard a movement that wasn't Neji's.

He opened his eyes looking at the ajar door and listening the sound louder. In an instinctive move he sat fast on the bed and it woke Neji up, blinking slowly and looking at his comrade with a "_what the hell_" expression.

"Wha-"

Shikamaru leaned fast on Neji's body, his hand shutting him up. Their bodies were attached, giving the Hyūga a heavy pressure in his chest.

_And we start again... _

Nara's hips were pressing Neji's in the futon, his left elbow sinking in the pillow next his head and his hand preventing the Hyuuga not to talk. His right hand putting a finger on his own lips in a silent request of stillness. Neji frowned a brow and stared at the man. Why the hell was he on top of him?

And the silly thought of this obviousness made him felt his mouth go dry under Shikamaru's fingers.

_Control yourself, for God's sake!_

Shikamaru's gaze caught his and the urge in his eyes made Neji went very still. The house was quiet and he looked at the ceiling above Nara, asking Kami-sama for control. It wasn't like he was going to do something, but at least he wanted not to notice the smooth touch of their bodies, or Shikamaru's breath upon his face, or their tangled legs, or - _please!_- their hips pressed as their strong abdomens.

Nara leaned his head till be near Neji's neck - making their body contact even worst to stand - his lips skimmed the shell of Neji's ear and caused the older to shiver lightly in response of the touch:

"Someone's in the house..." he muttered, his voice even lower than the sound of the breeze outside.

Neji widened his eyes.

"Do you feel any chakra? I can't feel it but I heard something moving" the question made Neji feels really mad.

The Hyuuga couldn't even breathe, how could he feel any chakra?

_Damn!_

He breathed calm, trying to concentrate, but his concentration was way too messy. He couldn't stop his fucking brain, or his sensory neurons yelling that he was strongly pressed against the futon, trapped by Shikamaru's body.

It was ridiculous because they were at the compound, and it had a good team security, no one could enter in the clan unnoticed. He snorted impatiently, trying not to feel their approximation and trying to feel any trace of chakra - which he wasn't feeling at all, for his even madder realization.

Neji rose his hand and shoved Shikamaru's fingers off his mouth in an impatient movement. He skimmed two fingers on his lips and whispered in a rough voice:

"Byakugan"

Then all was black, white and grey. He saw Shikamaru's heart beating heavily, his chakra system in a weird revolution that stated his alert situation, then his eyes went through the door, widening his vision field, running by the hallway and getting in the living room. His peripheral vision noticed a movement close to the window and his body stiffened.

"What are you seeing?" Nara asked concerned, still on his top, now looking inside those doujutsu eyes.

Neji snorted loud, as he was really mad with the situation and Shikamaru widened his eyes wondering what the jounin was seeing.

"You're scaring me!" he hissed.

"It's Chibi" he said, quitting his Byakugan and looking upset at the chūnin above him.

"Chibi?" Shikamaru blinked.

"A cat" he explained unwillingly.

"Fuck..."

Shikamaru felt all the stress fly away from his body and dropped his weight on Neji's shape, relaxing and breathing exhausted on the curve of his neck.

_What a pain!_

Then, suddenly, he realized their situation without moving. He was leaning on Neji, their bodies tightly pressed, his lips almost touching the soft skin of the man's throat, his own hair dropping on the jounin's face, their hips contacting more than would be advisable and his right thigh between the Hyūga's legs.

_Fuck!_

His heart raced painfully in his chest and he shivered, feeling a weird pressure down his stomach. That wasn't good...

"Nara..." Neji started, his voice husky and pissed "Get. Off. Me."

Shikamaru turned so fast he went dizzy, then watched the ceiling feeling completely ashamed.

"Cat, uh?" he joked, hearing Neji's pissed breath "Who knew..."

"If you value your goddamn life you better shut the fuck up and sleep"

Shikamaru bite his lip, not knowing whether laugh or cry.

"Troublesome" he muttered turning to the opposite side and waiting for the dawn to come fast.

Neji sighed. Indeed it was a _huge_pain in the ass. He couldn't sleep even if all he wanted was just to forget about the fucking stupid situation Shikamaru drove them in. But a strange ache in his chest didn't want to let him relax or just close his eyes to the world and sleep a couple of hours:

_How Shikamaru mistook an animal movement with a human one?_

And that made him sink in a profound reflection. The Nara must be under a huge stress, mixing up a cat movement with someone breaking into the house in the middle of the night. Did he even fall asleep or he passed all night with his stubborn genius mind going around their fucking chakra fusion and every odd things that were happening to them because of said bond?

The thought made him went very still and he looked at the man beside him. Shikamaru's shoulder bone shrugged and his uneven breath came out harshly.

_He should relax... Just sleep tight... Calm down his mind... _

Neji moved his arm slowly, he didn't want Shikamaru to stare back or even notice his aim. And in a firm and fast move he pushed a spot between the chūnin skull and nape, pressing his fingertip on it, sending chakra to the small point, making Shikamaru faint instantaneously, relaxing all his body and making his breath pass easy and slow between his parted lips.

Shikamaru always looked so controlled, so sure of himself and his strategies, that the idea of a genius being affected like this because of their bond almost scared him, making Neji feel a strange concern in his chest. Maybe that mess was breaking the Nara's mental schemes... Maybe he was feeling a bit lost...

_Shikamaru, what's happening to you?_

Neji himself had accept that the situation was driving him crazy, that it was annoying him more than he could have expected, but Shikamaru was the Lazy Bones... Nothing would drive him nuts or make him lost his geniality since Asuma's death.

But then, again, it wasn't expected to have a chakra fusion in their lives. Who knew it would happen? It was impossible to be prepared for something like that crap. And down deep in his brain Neji was aware about every single thing that involved this kind of bond, he was a Hyūga, he used to study chakras and everything that involved it...

And because of this he was pissed with Shikamaru; the stupid chūnin had no fucking idea about a thing! He didn't even know what was the whole meaning of a Conception Vessel connection... He was pitiless, and at any moment Neji would need to sit and explain to him that it could messy their minds even more than it already did, but he didn't feel like he could do that yet...

He begged Kami-sama to bring Shikaku back fast from his mission and just dissolve their bond before it could piss their minds up even more... And make their bodies more and more disturbed...

_Shikamaru, you don't have any idea about how troublesome it can become... _

And with this strange mercy in his chest, Neji decided to make things work well and try to be friendly, because maybe they would need more then Shikaku's help to solve their problem. And just in case of that possibility, they at least could try to be friends or anything approaching it.

Neji looked at the sky through the window and watched the dawn come and the sun start to rise in the horizon in a peaceful way that lulled him to fell asleep again.

And then, everything was going to change between them…

* * *

><p><strong>-TBC-<strong>

**A/N: **Neji worried is so cute... well, I hope you excuse my mistakes.** And today I'll beg for REVIEWS. **

**PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE! leave me a review! it means a lot for me ;_;**

_Thank you VERY MUCH for everyone that have reviewed it! You made me jump with joy here! o/_

Love, Love & Love

**Tai xxxxxxxx**

**WHO WANTS THE FIRST KISS? REVIEW IT!  
><strong>


	4. Water and Bubbles

**Disclaimer: **I don't own **Naruto**, otherwise** ShikaNeji **would be canon.

**BETA:** Lovely **PlugInSarah** did a fantastic great job beta-ing this chapter. ^_^ Dear, thank you so much! I really appreciate your help! I'm looking forward to keep working with you, if that's not asking too much. (L)

**READERS:** GODS IN A SHIP! I begged for reviews and you flattered me with an amount of lovely feedback! Really, I never thought I would receive so many reviews, I'm SO happy I don't know how to express my gratitude! You all made my heart melt! **THANK YOU VERY MUCH, SWEETIES!**

**WARNING: Fluffyness. And then hotness. Which means: sweet sugar lemonade ;) Let's read some first kiss then…**

* * *

><p><strong>When Shadows Surround You<strong>

_Chapter Four_

**Water and Bubbles**

It was late. He woke feeling so relaxed and happy; his mind clear and calm. He could hear the birds outside the house; the sun was warmer than yesterday and the touch of its warmth made him stretch his body lazily. His bare foot touched bare skin and he smiled, his eyes closed and one of his hands fingering his messy hair.

_Bare skin? _

Reality poured on him like cold water, making his body freeze and his eyes snap open.

_Shit!_

He'd almost forgotten about the fucking bond and by _whom_ he was sleeping. Shikamaru looked at the man's figure sitting on the bed, his head leaning back on the window frame, eyes on him, looking calm and serious in a good way. The bare skin was Neji's foot.

The Hyuuga had a bandage covering his stupid green seal, his white-almost-lilac eyes glanced at him with a strange peace in their orbs.

"Good morning" he muttered, moving his lips just a little bit.

"What time is it?" Shikamaru sat up too fast causing his headache start earlier today.

"Almost eleven," he said in an easy tone.

"And... how long have you been awake? Why didn't you wake me up?" he looked confused and grabbed the glass of water beside his side of the bed.

_My side, uh? What a pain!_

"A while... maybe three hours or so..."

"You should have woken me up" he said, his hands running over his face and holding his hair back.

"It's our week off" he said, almost smiling.

Neji was scaring him to death. Seriously, this man in front of him couldn't be the same Hyuuga that laid on that futon the last night! He stared at the dark brown trends spread across his chest, strongly contrasting with his white pajama t-shirt, his calm expression, his pink lips and his well delineated jaw.

"You must be starving..."

Maybe Shikamaru was, or at least his eyes were, taking in the masculine features of Neji's face. He looked almost like a divine being...

"Are you?" Shikamaru felt his mouth go completely dry listening to Neji's question and the Hyuuga closed his eyes, pretending not to notice Nara's gaze on his face, drinking in his calm expression.

"Yeah..." the voice was low, and when Neji opened his eyes again, Shikamaru was already dressing his chunin trousers.

Neji stayed in his pajamas, he didn't know why, but after he decided doing things was easier with each other, a homelike feeling slammed his ribs and he just wanted to feel it. He couldn't remember the last time he'd had a week off. They crossed the hallway, going to the kitchen and took some food to the living room, sitting at the kotatsu and pulling their legs under the warm blanket. Their backs leaned against the sofa and they looked out the window.

It was a peaceful morning, the light entered pleasantly through the half open window.

"Ei!" Shikamaru exclaimed, looking at the jounin. "What was that fucking cat doing here yesterday?"

Neji almost laughed at his childish expression, and sipped his hot coffee in amusement.

"It was Chibi Ball" he explained, a bit embarrassed by the stupid name. "Don't look at me like that, Hanabi named her. I had nothing to do with it…"

"And what the hell was she doing in your house?"

"Well..."

Fine, they needed to stay together at least five more nights. Neji snorted and looked at his mug of coffee, the dark liquid making him feel more alive with it's fantastic smell. Shikamaru was a really good coffee maker; maybe because he needed it to stay awake day after day.

_Lazy brat..._

"Hanabi found her on a mission, she was really small so my cousin brought her home." He sipped the coffee, feeling Shikamaru's eyes on him. "Hiashi didn't let her keep the cat; and she was crying like a baby so I said I would keep the cat at my place since she feeds her… So Hanabi always leaves the food under the window. But Chibi is never here, she's a kind of free spirit and is always running around the compound. Satisfied?"

"Neji... You have a cat?"

"Shut up."

"Fuck, you really have a cat! A Chibi Ball cat!"

"I said _shut up_!"

"C'mon, it's too sweet to be you."

"Well, you don't really know me!"

They went silent. Shikamaru felt weird and Neji was a little bit pissed. He stared at the kotatsu and felt his head ache. Fuck, he was supposed make things easier for them...

"Sorry."

"Neji, we have to spent some more time together, so I was thinking... Can I ask you something?"

The Hyuuga froze. Shikamaru's tone was serious and he didn't know if he was prepared to explain to him what everything hidden under the name Conception Vessel Bond was... But nothing prepared him for what came from the Nara's mouth:

"Why do you keep the house just like it was when your father was alive?"

His eyes widened and he stared at Shikamaru. He couldn't understand how someone could be that sharp. Why the hell was he digging that way?

"Why?" His voice sounded stunned.

"No, Neji, wait, you don't need to answer... It's just that the last couple days I've been an idiot and said things without thinking... And I was just wonderi-"

"Because it reminds me my childhood, or at least before my father's death. I was raised by relatives since his death so being here again makes me remember his aims, his strength. After the chunin exam Hiashi explained everything and... I just wanted to revive the memories and live it all again..."

Neji was looking at his mug. He was going to do it right; they were going to handle the situation and if it meant talking about himself, he was going to make it worth it... If it didn't work... Well, at least he would have been able to talk about it once in his life.

"I was happy in this house" he announced, a nice feeling filling his heart "Tokuma and I playing at the garden, learning how to activate our Byakugan at four... Listening patiently about how it was important to protect the clan, the main house, Hinata-sama..."

Shikamaru was really quiet, feeling a strong pressure in his chest, noticing that he had never heard his voice sounded so soft and nostalgic, like he was watching the memories in those pearly eyes...

_Neji, how much have you suffered?_

"I wanted it all back, and when I moved in it was my chance to live it again. To feel _my_ house, _my_ home, _my_ parents with me... even if I didn't have a mother... even if I just listened to stories about her, she was part of this house and my memories. I-just didn't want to feel alone again, so I preserved almost everything. My room and the kitchen are completely different, but everything else is the same..."

He glanced at Shikamaru with a small smile and nodded.

"It's my mom's kotatsu" he said, his voice almost happy. "They said she sat here for almost her entire pregnancy... But she wasn't lazy like you," he said jokingly.

"Badass…"

Neji drank more of his coffee.

"My turn," he said devilishly.

"Oh, shit... That's troublesome" Shikamaru smiled and grabbed his own mug.

"Snap it."

"So... What was that about no one spending the night at your place?"

Nara grinned at him and thought it could be worse.

"My rest is sacred, no one can disturb it," he lied.

"Do I disturb you?" he asked sharply.

"It's completely different," he almost blushed, looking away "I'm not good with the women in my life... All troublesome."

"Eh, Yamanaka and Temari-san, isn't it?" Neji repeated the names Yoshino said that first day.

"No, please, Ino is like my sister, I couldn't do that!"

He looked disgusted and shivered.

"But Ino sure is troublesome. Almost as much as my mother..."

"So you don't like to sleep beside your lovers."

"Yeah... I'm not prepared for this..."

Neji almost laughed at the stupid statement.

"Shikamaru, you sound like a teen right now. Please…"

"What? And you, do you spend your nights with your lovers in your bed?"

Neji chewed his lower lip. Fuck, he didn't like to talk about _his_intimacy. But he started the subject, he couldn't just stop and put a huge wall between them, so he looked at the window, maintaining his poker face.

"Of course I do, Nara."

Shikamaru snorted at the cocky way he said that.

"Fine" he said, without believing a word. He never heard a thing about Neji's relationships, he must be lying or at least it was not a relationship, it was just play-time.

"And I think it's pretty nice when you spend the night with someone you care about."

_FUCK! _

It sounded like a relationship.

"And who was the fortunate?"

"This, Nara," he said, looking at the chunin with an intense and mysterious gaze. "You will never know."

And with that, he stood up and paced five steps, walking to the window and hissing in a sweet way. A fat tabby cat jumped through the window, her elegant movements making Shikamaru remember the Hyuuga in front of him when he fought in juuken taijutsu style.

"Chibi Ball, Nara Shikamaru," he said lightly and Shikamaru raised a brow. "You have introduced me to your herd, I introduce you to my cat."

Shikamaru smiled with a grateful expression that made Neji think that it could work out.

_Please, work out..._

-x-

"Mom, you're such a pain!" he said, looking at her with an angry expression that made the woman glare back and say:

"You, lazy bones! Don't be rude with me, I'm still your mother!"

"Yeah, and we have a guest."

"And you're being extremely spoiled in front of him, you should be ashamed of yourself! I'm asking you politely to wash the dishes."

"Shit, mom!"

"Shikamaru, I need to get ready to visit your aunt, so quit the laziness now!" she hissed.

Neji watched the scene astonished. It wasn't that their relationship was ugly, just when Shikamaru went crazy and started to be a spoiled brat, like now. He was almost ashamed to be there witnessing their intimate moment. It was like jumping in the middle of a couple's fight...

_Maybe worse..._

Shikamaru pouted and pressed his arms tightly over his chest, holding Her gaze.

"Shikamaru, you're being really lazy, I can't believe you're my son..."

"It's Shikaku's fault," he said, still sitting in the chair.

"Lazy brat!" she exclaimed and pulled the chair with a sharp movement, almost dropping her son.

Neji almost laughed.

"Are you crazy, mom? You can clean it when you came back..." he pouted.

"Shikamaru, I can help you, and then it will be less _troublesome_ for you. We spent almost the whole afternoon here and your mother cooked for us and made tea; so we should help her."

"Kiss-ass brat!" the boy said with a betrayed expression.

"Oh, Neji, you don't need to do that." Yoshino said with a lovely tone. "It's my fault that this kid is that lazy, I always made everything for him and now look at him. Poor thing..."

"Don't start with the blackmail," he said, bored.

She grinned at him and put one hand on his left shoulder.

"You know what, Shikamaru? I think I will tell everybody you're sleeping with Neji..."

Neji went cold and glared at the man in front of him.

"Crazy woman..." he hissed and stood up, finally. "I'm only doing this for Neji's reputation"

She smiled happily and winked at Neji. After that the woman disappeared through the door frame. Shikamaru took off his waistcoat and rolled up the sleeves of his t-shirt, walked to the counter and opened the tap, letting the water run over the plates, pans, and glasses. He hated more than anything in his life to wash the dishes. It was the old punishment he was ordered to fulfill when he was a child.

_Fucking trauma! _

Neji watched the man start lazily spreading some soap on the scourer and glared, as it was the dishes fault.

"Why are you acting like that?"

"Shut up, Hyuuga." He snorted, wanting to throw the ceramic plates on the floor and step on them.

"You really don't like housework?"

"Dishes, I _hate_ washing the dishes..."

"What's so wrong with washing plates and pans?" The Nara glared at him, really annoyed. "I prefer it to cleaning the bathroom..." Neji stated calmly, unaffected by the sharp glare.

"They forced me throughout my childhood to wash the dishes as punishment" he explained unwillingly. "It has nothing to do with plates and pans."

"You have a wash-the-dishes trauma?" he asked, blinking at the chunin.

"Can you just shut the fuck up before I drive a fork in your white fucking eyes?"

_Wow._

Shikamaru was really pissed. And he went even more pissed when Neji started laughing at him, his loud laugh echoing off the kitchen's walls and making the Nara want to kill that stupid man.

"Seriously? You would really do something like this because I find it amusing that you have a wash-the-dishes trauma?"

"Hyuuga..."

Ok, it was funny, he knew that; but it was _his _trauma. No one could just laugh at him as though it was nothing! So he ignored the Hyuuga and started scrubbing the fucking chopsticks with more force than necessary. His jaw tight and his shoulders tense.

"C'mon" Neji said, standing up and walking toward him "Let's cure your trauma..."

He reached Shikamaru and rolled up his own robes sleeves, taking a scourer and putting soap on it. Then he took a bowl and started washing it.

"What? Didn't you listen to my mother? You're the _guest_, Neji."

"No, now I'm the psychologist-nin," he said, almost seriously. "C'mon, clean the pan."

Shikamaru snorted loud and started scrubbing the fucking pan. Oh god, he was so pissed, he really wished he had never accepted his mother's invitation for lunch.

"Look, we ate a lot, we had some lovely green tea and we spoke nicely with your mother during the entire afternoon. We helped set the table, now we help to clean..." He explained.

"Are you serious, Hyuuga? I'm not a kid; so don't speak with me as if I were one!"

"Don't be upset, we didn't start your rehab yet..."

_God, troublesome Hyuuga!_

Than Neji looked up at him and went silent, staring at Shikamaru's face.

"What now?" he hissed.

"Shikamaru..." he said looking concerned "You have something on your face."

"Eh?" Nara touched his cheek, and immediately realized that his hand was sloppy with bubbles and soap. "Fuck you!"

Neji smiled like a spoiled kid and it made Shikamaru hold his breath.

"No, Shikamaru..." he said, raising a hand to clean the false dirty spot in Shikamaru's face "This cheek..."

So he pressed a bubble-filled hand to the man's face, filling his cheek, nose, and lips with soap.

"_Sonofabitch!_" the Nara muttered shakily, pressing his eyes shut to not let any soap enter through his lids.

"And now, Shikamaru, we start your rehab." He announced this with a big grin on his lips that Nara couldn't see with his eyes closed.

Neji put his hands under the tap and filled them with water, a naughty smile on his lips, and then he threw the water onto Shikamaru's face, clearing off the soap.

"_Fuck!_ It's cold, you bastard!"

Neji laughed at his expression. Funny, the last time he did this - play while washing the dishes - was a long time ago, when his father was still alive.

_Look at this father, looks like I'm still a kid right now..._

Shikamaru opened his eyes, blinking off the water and glaring at Neji. The last thing those white eyes saw was a pissed Nara rubbing handfuls of soap on his mouth, daring him to speak or laugh and he reacted fast, stepping back and filling his hands again – but not fast enough. Then the chunin's hands were throwing an incredible amount of water in his direction, washing his face, robes and trousers.

"Shit!" he shouted happily and pushed Shikamaru away from the counter and started to shove water back.

Their hair was soaked and their clothes were too. Now they were laughing at each other, their eyes connected in the middle of each _water-attack,_ splashing themselves and pulling off their vests to shove more water.

"I think you need to wash your hair, Hyuuga!" Shikamaru said, pouring the green detergent on Neji's skull while pressing him against the counter with his body and rubbing it till the bubbles started to raise.

"Fuck, Nara!" he hissed back, stealing the detergent and pouring it on Shikamaru's neck and brushing it.

Yoshino was leaning in the hallway, watching the scene from the shadows. She just smiled at them, watching the scene as if it were a movie; watching her only child laugh in a way that erased the shadows of his war years.

_Neji, whatever you're doing to my kid, thank you..._

Neji felt his fingertips skim the bare skin of Shikamaru's jaw and neck, sliding in a nice movement, enjoying the soapy contact. He closed his eyes to keep the soap from sliding in, because the fucking bubbles were dripping down his forehead.

_Forehead?_

He went very still, brushing his thumbs over the olive skin without opening his eyes. Shikamaru was giggling and brushing his fingers nonstop. It was a warm sensation; no one had washed his hair since he was a child. His body was still tightly pressed against the counter, feeling the cold bubbles in his forehead, his _bare _forehead. It wasn't Shikamaru's fault or even his, but the fucking bandage and his hitai-ate had fallen during their water-and-bubbles fight.

But what was making him feel that warmness in his chest? Was it that Shikamaru didn't stop playing or shoving water, or making bubbles on his head because of this? Maybe he hadn't even noticed his light green seal. He was acting as if nothing weird was placed on the Hyuuga's forehead.

Neji almost smiled and pressed his fingers around Shikamaru's neck, pulling him closer in a blind movement, almost making their noses rub and rose his hand through his nape, reaching his black hair without seeing. Then he loosened the band and brushed his soapy fingers through the thick tresses, pulling it lightly and messing it up with his hands.

The movement was slow at the beginning, but feeling Shikamaru pull lightly back on his hair and head and shove water in his eyes, clearing them and pressing his soaked hand on his face, Neji started to run his fingers across the man's skull, massaging it with force; making the man lean on him even more and their chests pressed firmly together.

Shikamaru was happy. He was having so much fun playing with water and bubbles that he didn't care about the green seal tattooed on Neji's forehead being exposed. In fact he didn't care at all that the Hyuuga had it, he just wanted to keep playing the game and enjoy themselves.

He felt Neji's fingers brush his hair and it was nice, then he pushed the man's head back and cleared his eyes, feeling himself pulled forward and allowing himself to lean on Neji's chest, his sticky neck pressing against the jounin's shoulder.

Shikamaru took advantage of this and pulled Neji's hair down to the tap, rinsing it with a soft movement.

The Hyuuga opened his eyes, blinking the water off, looking at the joining of the wall with the ceiling. And he caressed Shikamaru's nape without thinking; one hand running to his back, keeping him there and the other fingering his hair. It made the chunin stop washing his hair and move his head backwards to look at Neji's eyes, his hand running to the spot between skull and nape, supporting Neji's head.

Their faces were centimeters apart, but neither tried to push back or move. Their eyes held an intense gaze, their quiet expressions, appreciating each other's features, their noses almost touching… and then Shikamaru breathed heavily, his warm breath caressing Neji's face, their hearts racing in beats, the grip on each other hair tightening...

_Shit!_

Shikamaru let his nose skim Neji's, sharing a knowing look, feeling their hips pressed in a lascivious way neither of them had realized before. Neji exhaled heavily, wetting his lips with the tip of his tongue and Nara caught the movement, breathing unevenly.

_Fuck!_

What the hell was happening to him? They were so close, he wanted it so much right now... What was wrong with letting himself just slam their mouths together and let it be?

But Shikamaru didn't decide. It was Neji's grip that tightened at the same time as he pressed his jaw in a masculine way Nara almost shuddered, and the grip made their mouths touch firmly.

Neji moaned heavily and Shikamaru pulled the man's head to him, pushing his hair and holding their lips together in a tight squeeze.

Their eyes were still open, their hands grabbing hair and clothes, making them feel completely dizzy.

It was the roughest lip lock Shikamaru had ever had. Their pressed closed mouths were fighting for more. So Shikamaru started parting his lips, deepening their rough kiss to an upgraded one, and Neji did the same, making their lips; caress, soft skin almost fitting, their breaths mixing together with the light touch of their parted lips.

"Shikamaru" Yoshino's voice was heard from the hallway "Clean the floor before you leave, and please, don't make out in my kitchen." Her voice was far from the kitchen's door but it was a _total_turn off.

_Fuck!_

They got busted. THEY. GOT. BUSTED!

Shikamaru went very still and stepped back, dropping his grip without looking back, not daring to look at his crazy mother that was not a fair player _at all_. How could the woman do something like _this_? Interrupt a moment like _this_? Killing all that hotness they were feeling?

"I'm leaving, behave yourselves!" the front door shut with a loud sound.

"Shit..." Hyuuga muttered.

"She is fucking crazy... and shameless..." Shikamaru said in a low tone, their eyes meeting in a disorientated gaze "Let's just tidy this mess up and leave."

Neji watched blankly as Shikamaru moved automatically, without really thinking, and started washing the dishes.

_Troublesome... _

-x-

The sun was setting when they left Yoshino's house. They needed almost an entire long and silent hour to tidy everything up again, cleaning the floor - which was a lot because of the amount of water and soap on it had covered half of the kitchen's tread. They worked carefully while trying to not slip or fall, washing it and drying it after.

Their eyes dropped any fugitive glance they shared without their will. And when it was over - no more cleaning, washing or drying left to do - they fell into an odd silence that almost took their breaths away. It was almost painful, they weren't able to say a word to each other, to look into the other's eyes, or even think about what happened.

Shikamaru couldn't stop blaming his mother for interrupting and Neji was dragged into a thoughtful reflection about how they ended up like this. His chest was aching so badly he asked himself when he had allowed it to start beating so fast in first place.

With a strange tone they muttered monosyllabic words to decide what they should do or where they should go. Shikamaru couldn't even stand the small possibility of them staying there any longer, and Neji accepted the decision to just grab some clothes and come back to his place.

The trip was silent too. Neji could feel the cold of the dusk in his wet hair and clothes and the sticky sensation of his soaped dark brown hair clinging to his face; so they started roof climbing the city to not allow anyone to see their wet-and-soapy condition. They were not ashamed of their soaked clothes, they were just avoiding any questions.

But the questions, if they stopped to think, weren't of the others. The questions were already been traced and fixed in their own minds.

_Must be the bond..._

Neji couldn't shove the little stupid voice in his mind. It couldn't be the bond... He didn't want to blame the bond when he was totally aware that he has part on it. He'd enjoyed the game and the teasing when he realized what it was, he didn't refuse the urge to grab Shikamaru's hair between his fingers and pull him forward, locking their lips together.

_I fucking wanted it!_

It wasn't an impulse from stupid chakra dots, it was down deep in his mind and heart, even if it was a game or a small taste of Shikamaru's lips... It was _his_ desire and _his _decision. Or, at least, he preferred to think it was. Because he didn't want to think that he was out of control...

Shikamaru pushed off the flat roof and felt the wind on his face, the sun was dying in the horizon and all he could think was how he wanted to kill his own mother. But, being the genius he was, he had to delve into the feeling and sink in the messy thoughts and emotions he was playing with.

_I want to kill her, because she made us stop._

The reason was that simple. Real and raw; fucking undeniable. He wanted so much to have parted his lips and upgraded the kiss just to have felt the taste of Neji's warm tongue in his mouth. He couldn't even think about it without trembling, his pulse increasing in his veins.

And now how was he supposed to act? To look inside those pearly eyes and not shiver or think about how that kiss could have felt?

_I wanted it so badly..._

He could stop being stubborn and think it was just a silly desire, like those that people usually have when they don't taste something they could have tasted. And thinking like this would make him feel less concerned, but that stupid beat in his heart, telling him in a _crescendo_ that he was lying didn't let him just erase his irrational thoughts.

They reached the Hyuuga compound and lowered the pace. Now what was really bothering both ninjas was the fact that they were going to be alone, bonded together by just a few steps in a huge house and after on the same futon.

Neji asked himself if he should explain about the small possibilities of the bond affecting them to Shikamaru, or if he should just spare him the truth. He opened the door and came in, taking off his sandals and feeling the wooden floor under his bare feet. Shikamaru did the same and followed the owner of the house in silent steps until they reach the bathroom's door.

The Hyuuga grabbed the door knob and with a light 'click' it was open. Lights on, he entered and spread the bamboo doors taking two towels and handling one to Shikamaru who was standing at the frame, leaning lazily.

They started drying themselves, the door closed with a thump, and their eyes finally met. It was warm, intense, and a little bit abashed, but neither dared to drop the gaze...

Neji snorted and rolled his white eyes, preparing himself to say that they were going to handle this, even if they didn't want to, because they were bound.

"Shikamar-"

The Hyuuga almost lost his balance and groaned painfully when his back was tossed against the cold wall. Shikamaru's hands gripping his white robes firmly, his teeth squeezing his own bottom lip and his midnight black eyes piercing Neji's pearly ones.

_Want. You. Now!_

He didn't think twice and locked their lips together, without giving any chance for Neji to move or react. And the response of his act was a dark moan filled with desire rising through the Hyuuga's throat beautifully.

Shikamaru felt the jounin's hands grabbing his waistcoat and pulling him even closer - if it was possible - and in a fast movement their lips parted synchronously, their eyes shut closed and their tongues touched in a slow-motion way that couldn't be real.

It was like every thing or person didn't exist anymore. The time warped around their bodies, and then it turned back to normalcy again. A delicious reality hitting them in a feverish ferocity that they didn't expect.

Shikamaru shoved his tongue inside Neji's mouth losing his already damaged control, groaning inside the Hyuuga's mouth and feeling the heat of his saliva melt his sanity away. He rocked their bodies reaching for more contact making them moan together in an animalistic way and let his hands run to Neji's neck, cupping his face in his hands and holding tight as if he was afraid of losing him.

Neji turned off the grip in the chunin's coat and drove it to Shikamaru's hips drawing them onto his and hissing in response, both tongues working painfully to reach and discover more and more...

_'Need more...'_

He slipped his hands under the fabric and touched that fucking olive skin, feeling arousal spread through his body. He couldn't fight against it even if he wanted to. He pressed his digits on the younger's waist, knowing that it would leave marks, and almost groaned just thinking about his fingertips marked on Shikamaru's skin...

It was hot and intense and the pressure made the Nara roll his hips against Neji's throbbing erection, making his hard on twitch in pleasure.

"Fuck!" Shikamaru hissed splitting their lips for a second, feeling Neji's uneven breath on his own lips and he fisted long dark-cocoa tresses, pulling it and spreading kisses down the Hyuuga's jaw, licking hard his jugular and nibbling the strong column of his throat causing Neji to groan loud and roll their hips hard.

"_God_..."

Fuck! Neji was so hard he couldn't breathe, pressing their clad erections together and clawing in Shikamaru's skin, he wanted to delve his nails into it feeling the opened mouth kisses on his jaw.

Shikamaru sighed and pulled Neji's hair, making their mouths slap together. Teeth biting lips and tongues forcing their paths to come together. The Hyuuga's hand crept down Nara's spine, making him shiver and gripping his buttocks, their erections growing even more inside their pants making it painful and full of sin.

Neji quit the kiss again and trailed his tongue down Shikamaru's chin, biting it hard and almost raising the man with his strong grip on his ass. He just wanted to feel more, he needed more, he couldn't fight it.

It was irrational and sinful, and in a desperate move he turned their bodies and pressed Shikamaru's back sharply against the wall, rolling and rolling their hips together, tearing moans and groans through the bathroom, his face pressed against Shikamaru's neck, biting hard his tanned skin.

Neji grabbed Shikamaru's wrists and brought them up on top of his loose ponytail, thrusting it against the wall and sucking the fast pulse in his throat in a devilish way that could have left a mark, but he controlled it.

"So... _damn_ good" Nara purred in a rough tone that made Neji grin devilishly and put their mouths together again; making their fingers tangle together and a warm sensation pinch the bottom of their columns "So... _damn _hot... hn... fuck..."

Neji devoured every inch of Shikamaru's tongue and felt so damn good that-

"No" he hissed, their swollen lips reaching for air together "No... No... Not now!" Neji was mad, but he kept his waist moving even sharply.

"Wha-"

"Fucking _unbelievable_!" Neji shouted and thrust away.

His throbbing cock was marking his trousers; shakily he drove a hand through his hair and breathed deeply, searching for patience. Shikamaru was completely confused, what the fuck was that?

"The _HELL,_ Hyuga" he groaned rough and slid his hand over his hair, reaching the other hand to pull the man back.

But the Hyuga stepped back fast and opened the door harshly.

_Looks like you're not cooperating, fucking fate! Getting us busted makes you feel amused?_

"What do you want?" he hissed down the hallway feeling the oh so familiar chakra in the living room.

Shikamaru froze.

_Really? _

He couldn't believe that.

"Need a drink" the cracked voice made Neji feel cold slide into his bones, his heart skipped a beat and his hands grabbed the door knob in concern.

"Just a sec, Tokuma" he muttered, reentering the bathroom and leaning on the wall heavily. "Need a shower, can you wait outside?" his voice became cold and calculated, and his closed eyes were trying to kill the arousal his body was still feeling.

Shikamaru opened his mouth but said nothing, it was just unbelievable. _Fucking unbelievable! _He pushed Neji out of his sight and slammed the door with a loud thump, feeling his troublesome body start to slow down when he leaned on the other side of the door.

"Pitilessly troublesome... _FUCK!_" he pounded hard on the door and allowed himself slide to the floor, perplexed.

**TBC**

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><p><strong>AN: **Tokuma, _really_? _Again_? I will need to scold you: STOP APPEARING LIKE THIS IN MY FUCKING PLOT, DUDE! Hahahaha Mah mah… I should say I love Toku, but I love more Yoshino… she is such a good mom… hahaha both of them are huge killjoys'…

So, did you like it? ;_; I'm terrified here, it's my first shikanejishika kiss and make out… did I screw it up? I think I deserve some reviews, this time I'll not beg for them, I'll just wait patiently and hope I caught your attention…

If you want neji and shika babysitting AND going to Kiba's party: REVIEW IT AND PLEASE STAY TUNED!

Thanks again for all people that spent their time reading and reviewing this fic, hope you like this chapter!

**Love, Love & Love!**

**Tai xxxx **


	5. Kill the Queen

**Disclaimer: **I don't own **Naruto**, otherwise** ShikaNeji **would be canon.

**BETA: **lovely **PlugInSarah** beta-ed this one too. Thank you so much darling, even with your finals you did this great job! *-*

**WARNING:** **Sasuke** came back to the village after helping Naruto to kill Madara, ok?

So, enjoy this insanely **long chapter**. It's the biggest I wrote till now. Let's discover about the true of this chakra bond:

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><p><strong>When Shadows Surround You<strong>

_Chapter Five_

**Kill the Queen**

* * *

><p>Neji heard the strong fist against the wooden door and shivered. He couldn't blame Shikamaru; he was losing his mind too. He would need a really cold shower and a lot of patience to steady his senses and body. But what made him stop the make out wasn't the fact that Tokuma was in the living room. They could have finished before coming out. The problem was the chakra; darkness and pain enveloped the immense amount of loss in his cousin's always oh-so-powerful energy. And he couldn't keep his attention on Shikamaru; it was disturbing his senses!<p>

Of course, his own body was protesting below his waist. His mind was torn between the rationality of being concerned with Tokuma and the animalistic need of ending it and leading not only him but Shikamaru too, to the edge of relief and pleasure.

He turned off the water, dried himself with the soft towel, wrapping it around his waist, tied his headband, and opened the door. The shadow-nin was beside it, leaning on the wall, standing up, arms crossed tightly over his chest, his jaw line hard with disgust and his eyes cold.

He sighed, fingering his own wet hair and closed his eyes. He leaned beside the younger man and almost felt the arousal gather in his groin again.

"Sorry..." he muttered, torn between feeling ashamed, pissed and concerned.

"Whatever..." Shikamaru said, leaving his place on the wall and starting to walk out of the bathroom.

"Shikam-" but he was pressed against the wall, his eyes widening in surprise. Nara's open palm caressed his chest over the scar he earned in their first mission together, sending strong vibrations from the touch, just like the electroshocks he felt the first day they were bonded.

"If you don't _want _me to toss you back into the bathroom and finish what we started, you should shut _the fuck _up" he muttered, the aggressive tone and his burning black eyes made Neji shiver.

He wasn't scared, he was fighting against his own desire. Damn! He wanted _so badly_ to be tossed in the washroom and finished. But he didn't move. He couldn't. Tokuma's cracked chakra was worrying him too much.

_Damn, Shikamaru!_

He hissed inside his head when the younger cut their contact and closed the bathroom door loudly.

"Tokuma..." he whispered, knowing that the ninja would listen to him even if his voice was husky and almost gone. He heard the slow steps and when the figure of the man appeared in the dim hallway he let an interjection flee between his parted lips "What..."

His voice cracked, watching his beloved cousin bang his covered forehead on the wall. His fingers clenched into fists while lightly pressing against the partition and his jaw clamped. He was shattered. Neji touched his shoulder and began softly stroking it.

"Toku..." his own voice sounded agonized, he bit his lip and pulled the man closer, making eye contact. "What happened to you?" He sounded worried, but didn't express all the pain he was feeling just seeing his cousin like this.

"Mission. Fucking mission" he muttered, his white eyes expressing no more than emptiness.

"What did they do to you?" Neji hissed, pressing Tokuma's arms in his hands "Are you wounded?"

His eyes traveled over the other Hyuuga looking for some injury, but there was no sign of physical damage.

"They did something terrible to her..." he whispered in a low tone "And I did nothing..."

"Who, Tokuma?"

"Fucking mission!" he repeated.

"Don't mess with me!" he shook the man's shoulders "Who Tokuma, who is so terribly hurt?"

"Can't say" he cried out, dropping their eye contact.

"Who was on that mission, Toku?"

"I can't!" he shouted "It's the protocol!"

"You can't keep it to yourself, look at you! I won't tell anyone!" he hissed angrily.

"You will..."

"Tokuma, just spit it out!" he growled.

"Can't- Neji... just... forgive me, I didn't complain... not even a world... I- so weak" his lips trembled but he didn't shed a tear. He closed his white-lilac eyes and exhaled. And then he was calm once again "Brought sake" he said biting his shaking lip "Will grab you some clothes..." his voice was deep in pain but controlled and Neji felt the ache spread in his chest.

"Toku..." he muttered when his cousin disappeared into the bedroom door silently.

_What have you seen?_

-x-

Shikamaru left the shower box, relaxed after the cold water and the underground touch he allowed himself to. He looked at the mirror and stared the bruises in his waist.

_Fucking Hyuuga... _

But then he grinned at his reflection and brushed his fingertips over the marks and started to dry himself with the towel. What the fuck was that stupid relative doing here? He felt bile rise in his throat. He had sensed it in the first day Tokuma appeared, that possessive aura around him, looking down deep in Neji's eyes as if he could see more than anybody had ever seen inside the jounin.

His sweet voice, the sarcasm in his tone when he said Neji had a _guest_.

_Bastard._

Maybe he was doing that because he knew Neji and was afraid of him being around Shikamaru 24/7, or because he knew about the ways to release the bond. The Nara grinned victoriously, he didn't finish Neji, but Tokuma was jealous. The thought made him press his fingers in the red-almost-purple marks on his waist. A possessive impression running down his spine and making him bite the inside of his cheek until it hurt enough to stop his thoughts and clear his mind.

His calm and his lazy expression was back when he opened the door and took a look at the Hyuuga cousins sitting on the floor, drinking sake from the bottle.

Neji was fully dressed in his pajamas, and the thought of him changing clothes in front of his cousin made Shikamaru feel almost homicidal, but he shove the feeling away when he saw Tokuma's expression. He was sadder than he'd ever seen him before, even during the war with all the death in front of their eyes.

"Need some clothes..." he said, making both Hyuugas look up at him. Neji stood up, walking silently with him to the room and Shikamaru started changing clothes, amused to notice the white glance at his waist and the ghost of a grin on Neji's lips when he saw the marks.

"Shikamaru-"

"Is he ok?" he interrupted the man, he didn't want to listen to any apologies, he saw Tokuma's sad eyes even if he wanted to deny it; guilt almost hit him because of his selfish thoughts in the bathroom. Now he could understand why Neji was so out of character half an hour ago "He doesn't look fine."

"Something about the mission."

He hummed, getting ready to leave the room, throwing an intense gaze at the other before moving.

"Sake?" Neji offered, his stoic face never dropping the gaze until they reached the door frame.

Tokuma was sitting in the kotatsu when they came back, his head lying on the sofa seat behind him and three big glasses were filled with strong sake.

At the end of the bottle, the elder Hyuuga was tipsy, muttering something about the mission and laying his head on Neji's lap without permission. But Neji was relaxed by the alcohol and Shikamaru was in his lazy sleepy mode, lying in the soft mat and covered by the kotatsu's blanket, and the last thing he saw before falling asleep was his bound mate fingering his cousin's hair and he twisted inside with jealousy.

Neji stayed awake till the night lulled his relative into a light sleep before he pressed a chakra finger on his nape to make him rest completely, he listened the babbling words again.

"Sorry… wanted to help... really wanted... forgive me- didn't protest... didn't save you-"

And Neji felt cold freeze his bones with the name Tokuma whispered so low he wished he'd heard wrong:

"_Yamanaka_..."

-x-

He woke up to an undertone voice whispering things in his ears softly. It was gentle and nice and could let him appreciate the touch on his chest and the warm breath on his cheekbones.

Neji felt the hand brush his chest trying to wake him up, but he didn't want to open his eyes because the feeling would leave.

"Neji! It's almost ten o'clock; we _need _to go!"

He opened his eyes to see Shikamaru kneeling by his side, his hair in the typical ponytail and some anxiety in his eyes.

"And the sleepy beauty finally woke up!" he sighed and straightened his body. "Tokuma made coffee before leaving an hour ago, it's in the thermos, just drink it. We need to go." He lifted his chin, indicating the bottle above the kotatsu.

How long did it take him to get to sleep last night? God, he'd stayed up at least three hours ruminating about the name Tokuma let slide through his lips in a drunken hum. He didn't know what to think or what to do, he didn't know what had happened to Yamanaka on the mission. He almost didn't want to know after seeing how messed up his cousin was.

"He said he needed to report the Hokage and apologized about last night-"

"Report over the mission?"

"Think so..."

"We need to go there!"

_We need to see if Yamanaka is ok. Shikamaru, I don't want you to lose her..._

"No, we need to have breakfast and pick A-chan up from the kindergarten at eleven!" he correct and poured the hot coffee in the mugs. Fuck, his head was hurting a little, he would need a good rest to face the party tonight.

"A-chan?" Neji sat and looked at him confused "Kindergarten?"

"Yes, kindergarten and yes A-chan, my goddaughter." He explained, pushing the mug into Neji's hands harshly.

"Oh" he looked the coffee, bringing his memories to life.

Asuma was dead and Kurenai-san was pregnant. That was five years ago...

"She's your goddaughter?" he asked, sipping the coffee.

Shikamaru nodded and quickly drank his coffee, pouring some more in his mug. He really needed to sober up - even if he wasn't drunk at all - and stop the headache or taking care of A-chan would be a total knock-out!

Since one hour ago, when he woke up with Tokuma's soft steps in the living room, he was trying to push away all the odd situations they'd been through yesterday. How he would look again to his mother, how he should act around Tokuma - because he for sure caught what was happening in the bathroom the other night - or, worst, how he should behave with Neji.

He didn't know where the make out session in the bathroom left them. What was it? What was their _relationship _now? He tried not to freak out and decided not to wake up Neji before he settled down his stupid doubts and cleared his head. So he found a good conclusion.

_Nothing happened yesterday._

He told himself, over and over again, till he was sure he almost believed it. If you tell a lie again and again you can make yourself believe it, and he did it. He pushed himself to believe that nothing at all happened yesterday, just a lot of stupid shit he didn't want to repeat aloud. He wanted to forget, and he almost did it.

_Till the bastard moaned in his sleep._

He didn't say a concrete word; he just babbled and moaned, brushing his hands in his face and travelling them through his chest, grabbing the point Shikamaru touched when he tossed the Hyuga against the wall. Upon his scar.

And Shikamaru woke him up, because he was afraid to lose it again.

They changed clothes and walked silently. He had no idea about what Neji was thinking, but he hoped it wasn't about their make out. He just...he didn't want to face it again.

So, when it was already eleven o'clock, they reached the kindergarten and watched the children leaving the front door. And there she was: short black hair falling to the base of her chin, red eyes looking around - he knew she was looking for him - she turned to them and smiled full mouth, starting to run.

Shikamaru smiled back and knelt, opening his arms and waiting for her to throw herself into the embrace. She did it and he spun with his goddaughter pressed against his chest, small arms holding hard on his shoulders, free legs flying with the movement.

"Shika-kun!" she grinned, messing his ponytail.

"How are you A-chan?"

"Great!" she smiled and looked at the man beside them "Who is he? He looks like Hina-chan!"

"Yep! Let me introduce you." He put her on the floor "Akane-chan, this is Hyuuga Neji, Hinata's cousin"

"Hi," she said timidly.

"Nice to meet you" Neji said politely, feeling awkward; he was really not used to kids.

"Why'd he come?" she asked in a whisper, grabbing Shikamaru's sleeve.

"Oh, it's a long story, we can tell you during the lunch" he smiled to her and caught her backpack "Wow, it's heavy, what do you put in your bag, kunais?"

She grinned happily and stretched her small arms to him. Nara smirked and pulled her into a pony back ride.

"Are you hungry?" he asked.

"Haaaaai!"

Neji was quiet. It was not the girl, it was Shikamaru, talking soft and spoiling the kid. He was smooth and his expression was warm.

_You do this every Friday?_

That was a shade of the lazy-nin he didn't know at all. It was surprising and compelling to watch, like he was meddling into a reality he was not invited to join. And it became even more crystal clear when they sat at a barbecue restaurant with the girl at twelve o'clock and they started to eat.

She knew everything about him, and she wanted to know each detail about his week. All missions, paperwork, news about _Yoshino-obaachan _and _Shikaku-ojiichan _and when she was going to spend the night with him again.

"So you spent the night with Akane-chan, eh?" he joked and Shikamaru looked at him as he was going to kill the man.

"Yep! When mummy was in the hospital!" she grinned happily and looked at her godfather.

And the awkward feeling hit the Hyuuga, he didn't say a word again until...

"Why are you here?" she asked, a little bit annoyed.

"Don't be rude, young lady, he's my friend."

"Thought just Ino-neechan and Choji-niichan were your friends" and here her eyes shone in remembrance "And Naruto-sama!"

"Quit the _sama_ story!"

"He's goin' to be Hokage, Shika-kun" she smiled.

"Neji and me... We had some troubles at work" he said.

"Troublesome..." she muttered with her mouth full of food.

"Indeed, A-chan"

"Why?"

_Fucking curiosity!_

Neji was starting get impatient.

"We failed a jutsu and got stuck together" he said simply.

The girl's eyes widened and she drank some water, without dropping the gaze.

"Yep, and then we can't be apart. It's scary, isn't it?" he messed her hair, watching her concerned gaze became a shade of sadness "Akane, you ok?"

"You're living together?"

"Yep, just till we solve the problem"

"You can't!"

Her pitched voice echoed, drawing attention. Neji stared speechless, remembering why he didn't want to have a family.

_Stupid kids..._

Her eyes fixed a possessive glance to Neji and looked really pissed for a five year old girl.

"Eh, Akane, what's that for?" Shikamaru asked low and looked at her concerned.

"You're going to marry _me_! Not him!"

_Fuck!_

Neji was amazed. Fuck, it was funny. He gave a look at Shikamaru and almost burst into laughter. What the hell? So Nara had a _chibi_-girlfriend! Oh, that was good!

"Who knew..." he muttered receiving a dead-look; putting his elbow on the table and resting a chin in his palm "C'mon Shikamaru, I didn't know you had a girlfriend" he grinned at him and the girl grabbed Nara's arm.

"Don't look at him like that!" she shouted at the naughty look Neji was giving to her husband-to-be.

"Why not?" Neji asked without glancing at her. He was enjoying that _so_much, he could almost see pink in Shikamaru's cheeks.

"Because he will fall in love with you!"

They froze. Both men froze because of a stupid statement a little spoiled brat said. Neji shove his body back to the seat, Shikamaru looked away and the girl pouted.

And the awkward sensation stayed until they reach Nara's clan. Neji didn't want to enter the house, or see Yoshino-san, it would be disgraceful, but the girl managed to make Shikamaru bring her to see "_obaachan_".

_He's doing that because he's a lazy bastard and doesn't want her to cry in the middle of the street... Shameless... _

"Obaachan!" she yelled, jumping in the window, trying to see inside.

"A-chan, don't do that, let's just... go inside" his voice sounded scared, and when the girl ran through the hallway he looked at Neji. "Sorry."

"I'm not coming in."

"Oh fine, so I'll just force us into shattering pain and come back later," he scoffed.

"Fuck you, Nara, I'm not going to look at your mother after what she saw yesterday!"

"Hyuuga, that's not easy for me eithe-"

"So you should have said to your fucking goddaughter we couldn't come because your mom was busy!" he hissed.

"I can't lie to her like that!"

"Then find a way to go inside without me!"

"Neji!"

"Not at all..."

"Fuck, Hyuuga!"

"Fuck you!"

"Yeah, fuck me!" he shouted "Shouldn't have let that happen yesterday, you're a huge bastard!"

"Oh thanks" Neji rolled his eyes "Talking the one who shoved me against the wall... _twice"_

"Seriously?" Shikamaru glared at him "_You_ kissed me in my _mother's_ kitchen! _You_ started all the _water-fighting-thing_, _you_-"

"_You_ didn't complain when I did it" Hyuuga's voice was low and he pressed Nara against the wooden wall in the porch with both hands pushing his chest. They could listen to voices inside the house "You just complained when I _stopped_" their faces were close, their eyes hating each other and their breaths patting. Neji leaned his lips and brushed it on Shikamaru's in a butterfly kiss "And you're not even trying to push me away!"

Neji dropped the grip before the other man could hit him and sat on the front steps.

"Are you insane?" Shikamaru hissed "What are you playing at?"

"Shut up, Nara" he rubbed his temples annoyed.

"Fuck, Neji, you're such an ass... I... I ha-"

"Hey boys, stop arguing like an old couple" Yoshino appeared in the front door with Akane on her heels "Come on in, I will make some tea."

Yoshino was really good pretending nothing had happened yesterday. She made tea and brushed Akane's hair, telling her about her week and asking the girl about Kurenai. Neji discovered that every Friday Shikamaru would pick her up and they'd spend the day together, taking care of her and trying to be aware of each little step in her student life.

They were like a family, she would grow up like a nice kid and become a respectful woman as Asuma would have desired, and Shikamaru would do anything to make her happy.

"I need to leave" Yoshino said, after playing with the girl for a long hour "You two behave and take care of her, don't forget you have a kid in here" she said concerned.

"Mom you don't need-"

"I know you always try to play the father role with her, Shikamaru." She said, watching the hallway to see if the girl was coming from the bathroom "So, let's pretend nothing happened yesterday and that's ok."

Neji was as red as a tomato, sitting on the tatami floor in the back of the house, the door spread open to the small garden.

"Nothing happened yesterday, mom." Shikamaru said confidently and Neji looked up at him. What the fuck, was he denying it now?

"Hai, hai, Shikamaru" she smiled and prepared to leave "Akane-chan, give me a hug, I need to go!"

The girl came running from the bathroom and hugged the woman, saying goodbye and waving. So the kid started playing with the pieces in the Shoji board.

"Shika-kun, let's play Shoji!"

"Good idea" he said, sitting again.

"Ok, we two against _the Hyuuga_" she said bitterly.

"He will lose like this, you're such a good player, A-chan" he smiled at her.

"I won't lose" Neji stated. He was a pretty good player, he used to play with some elders at the compound, and the girl started to laugh.

"You're such a cocky!" she said.

_The fuck!_

Shikamaru glanced at her, finding it amusing, she was staring at the Hyuuga in a challenging manner, and the man was completely pissed.

_Who the hell does this little brat think she is?_

"I'm not cocky" he muttered dangerously; breathing to calm down "I'm used to playing Shoji."

"No one plays Shoji like Shika-kun. He is a strategist, the _best _in the Land of Fire!"

"Let's see..."

"No, I'm serious!" she yelled as if he didn't listen to her "You won't beat him, it's impossible for you!"

"Nothing is impossible to me."

"Cocky!"

_Shut up._

"Why are you so cocky?" she continued.

"Why are you so annoying?"

"Neji..." Shikamaru intervened.

"Well, she is."

"I'm not! You're just jealous because Shikamaru is going to marry _me_ and not _you"_

"Can you stop this?" he asked politely, after all she was just a five year old girl.

_Very annoying by the way..._

"So let's bet!" she said grinning.

"Fine!"

_Oh, I will make you shut the fuck up, little brat!_

"Whoever loses has to call the other by '_dono_' for the next 24 hours!" she grinned in her childish way and he nodded.

"No way" Shikamaru grumbled.

"Are you afraid of losing, _Shika-kun?_" Neji teased.

"No."

"Oh, yes you are." Neji stated, proud of himself.

"I never lose in Shoji," he explained.

"I never lose at all." Neji warned.

"Cocky!" the girl muttered.

"Shut up!"

"Neji!"

"If you're not afraid, so why don't you accept the bet?"

"It's troublesome..."

"Lazy bones..."

"But it is."

"Because you don't want to call me _Neji-dono,_isn't it?"

"You wish..."

"Sissy..."

"Ok, let's do that" he sat in the front of the Shoji board "And I will show you how sissy I am."

"I'm wondering..."

-x-

The fucking girl was laughing so much he wanted to kill her. It was a long game, but fate wasn't being nice with him.

_It never has been... _

Shikamaru had his arms crossed over his chest and a solemn expression. He had some trouble with Neji because the Hyuuga was a really good player, but after almost an hour and a half he finally defeated him with a good strategy. And now, he was yearning to listen.

"How in hell?"

"I told you that you couldn't beat him" the girl said happily.

"You... _Shit_, you're good!"

"Watch your mouth, Hyuuga."

Neji rolled his eyes, wanting to kill himself. How in hell had he lost! It was really a pain in the ass. So the girl started a winner dance and laughed and giggled and-

_Fuck!_

He needed to pay the bet now. And he was not going to call Shikamaru by _dono_ it was too shameful and he was not accepting it _at all_. Fucking minute he thought he was able to beat the strategist of Konoha. Fucking minute they picked the stupid girl up at kindergarten!

"So..." Shikamaru started, looking seriously at him "I'm waiting"

"No."

"You lost."

"Rematch!"

"The hell we will."

"No."

"Neji!"

"Fu-"

"Don't…"

"Shut up, Nara!"

"Nara-_dono_" he corrected. A strange pleasure in his lazy face. He was eager to listen.

"Not at all!"

"Sissy!"

Neji rolled his eyes, he wanted to die! Oh fuck, he was not going to say that, NOT AT ALL! He couldn't even imagine that stupid suffix rolling in his tongue, not to him, not to that lazy stupid ass!

"Don't make this a big thing, is just a suffix" Shikamaru said.

"It has a meaning!"

"You were ok with that when you asked me to play"

_Shit..._

"Fine!" he hissed and looked at the chunin "Nar- Nara... Nara-do..." he blushed, in rage and shame. He wasn't doing that, for God's sake!

_Fucking fate!_

"Nara-do... What a pain! Nara-dono!" he hissed "Satisfied?"

The girl was rolling on the tatami, hands on her belly and a stupid smile on her lips.

"Sounds great!" she laughed.

"Again." Shikamaru said.

"WHAT?"

"Again."

"Sadistic prick!"

"Just to make sure I heard it well."

"Oh, I will kill you!"

"Hyuga..."

"Shikamaru!" he cried out madly.

"Shikamaru-_dono_"

"You-"

"Say it again."

"Sh... Shika... Shikamaru-" he muttered in pain.

"I didn't hear it." Shikamaru was having so much fun he couldn't bear it.

"Sh... Shi- hell! Shikamaru-do... _dono_" he blushed again.

Nara felt a wave of pleasure. It was nice to hear, was almost sexy the rage way that he pronounced it, with pain. Oh he so deserved it.

"Thanks," he smirked.

Neji rolled his eyes. It was a pain. He was not going to pronounce Shikamaru's name till tomorrow. He was having a rage wave and he wouldn't say it anymore.

"Time to take a nap!" Shikamaru stretched his body lazily, moving his legs off the table and picking the pad in a lazy movement "C'mon, A-chan, we played a lot already, let's sleep a little bit."

She pouted but accepted, laying beside him and smiling, she looked so cute Neji felt the rage fade in his chest, watching Shikamaru lay his head in the pillow and close his eyes, caressing the girl's hair in a light lulling movement.

"Neji-san, you can lay beside me." She said, her eyes closing with the caress.

He moved without thinking, grabbing a pad too and putting it beside her. It was weird but nice, to feel peace watching the ceiling, and in fifteen minutes she was already sleeping. He smiled at the girl, her kind expression and her messy hair making her look like an angel though he knew she wasn't at all.

"Thanks" Shikamaru murmured, closed eyes and sleepy voice "I know she is not easy to handle..."

"Hn."

"But I will charge the _dono_ thing" he said with a bigger smile.

Neji tried to punch him, but Nara grabbed his hand and sh-ed, holding his fist in his fingers, not letting go.

"Just sleep, Neji..." he asked.

And he did; laying on his shoulder, his hand in Shikamaru's hand, the girl between them and a lazy feeling of peace. When Yoshino came back and looked at the scene, she smiled. Fingers tangled together and their faces showing a pleasant expression. She watched it for some minutes, deciding to let them sleep a little bit more before waking them up.

_Eh, Shika, looks like you're having a great time... _

-x-

The music was loud, they were more than an hour late and they didn't give a shit. Yoshino forgot to wake them up, so they needed to run to get ready for the party. The pub was full, a lot of ninjas were all over the place, the smoky air was dry and the smell of sake made Shikamaru run his tongue over his dry lips.

_God, I need a drink!_

He woke up with his fingers tangled with Neji's, Akane-chan pressed against his chest and white eyes watching him. They were completely late but the Hyuuga just smiled at him and moved his fingers away. He could still feel those long fingers in his hand, the feather like touch, the silky skin...

"Troublesome..."

"THE BONDED BOYS!"

Naruto's loud voice made Neji hope he didn't wake up till tomorrow morning. That's ok, he was going to survive; he knew he could do this. So Kiba opened his arms and hugged Shikamaru in a drunken way that made Nara hiss and push him away.

"Happy birthday!" he said, scratching his nape.

"Thaaaaanks!" Kiba's eyes were small and he smelled like sake and beer.

"Inuzuka, happy birthday" Neji muttered maintaining the distance.

"Where were you?" he sounded really drunk "You're laaate!"

"Sorry, it was my day to take care of A-chan"

"Ohhhh! Is A-chan all right?"

"She is just fine" Shikamaru travelled his eyes through the bar, looking where each friend was, mapping the corners and tables "We'll grab a drink, ok?"

"Peeeerfect!" he answered shouting.

They walked side by side; their street clothes making people turn their heads. Neji was in a black V-neck t-shirt with black trousers, all his outfit made him look even paler, his eyes shining pearly and lilac with the lights of the dancing floor. Shikamaru felt a hot wave down his stomach when Neji left the bathroom thirty minutes ago; he was looking so different like this... so... masculine... powerful... sexy... damned hot!

_Shit!_

Sakura was close to the bar, gripping on the back of a chair, keeping her balance when she saw and greeted them.

"Are you ok?" Shikamaru asked, putting a hand on her waist to help her sit.

"No" she smiled "I've been drinking since 7 o'clock."

"But, it's already ten!"

"Know that" she breathed loudly "I drank because I didn't want Ino to pass out..."

"Ino?" Shikamaru asked and Neji turned his head to look for the blond girl.

"She's totally out of character... She wanted to drink non-stop, so I didn't let her have all that alone, and drank almost three quarters of her drinks, you know she's a light drinker..."

"Hn."

Neji found her in the middle of the dance floor, tiny skirt and purple top, her hair in a huge ponytail, blond threads spreading onto her back and shoulders, hands stretching to the ceiling and moving sexily.

"Troublesome!" Shikamaru hissed and pulled Neji with him walking in the middle of the dancing people and reaching the blond "Already drunk?"

"Shiiiiiika!" she smiled, red face and a dangerous look in her eyes "Wanna dance with me?"

"I don't dance" he said, grabbing her wrist "Why are you drinking like this?"

"Life is a bitch, Shikamaru..."

Neji watched her, looking for any physical damage. Nothing at all, she looked perfectly fine... But something in her voice, in the sombre way she pronounced the sentence, made him feel that dim sensation he had speaking with Tokuma yesterday.

"C'mon, let's sit"

"Don't wanna siiiit" she sing-songed the words, grabbing Neji's t-shirt and pulling him closer "Wanna dance, Hyuuga?"

He looked inside her eyes looking for something else, but he couldn't see anything except the inebriated glance, the tipsy voice, nothing sounded as cracked as Tokuma yesterday.

"No, but I can buy you a drink." he offered.

"Neji!" Shikamaru hissed.

But the Hyuuga was already walking with the blond dancing around him. They walked back to the bar, but Sakura was not there anymore, and asked two bottles of sake and one lemon juice, just to sober Ino up.

So they sat at the table, watching the blond girl demand some alcohol but didn't let her go. Sakura was looking her friend, concerned. Shikamaru was pissed, but Naruto worked to lighten their mood, talking about how Kiba was drunk and that he couldn't talk properly.

And then Shikamaru saw Neji drinking from the bottle, his head thrown back, his long loose hair falling sexily on his black t-shirt, mixing with the colour, the masculine jaw looking hot meeting the column of his strong throat. He lit a cigarette to withdraw the heat.

"Ino-chan, are you better?" Naruto asked, smiling at her and receiving a drunken smirk "Wanna dance to sober up?"

"Don't wanna sober up ever again" she said painfully but stood up and walked with the Uzumaki.

"What happened to her? Where is Choji?"

"Something about the mission..." Sakura muttered in a tipsy tone "Choji must be in the toilet, he was trying to make her stop drinking, but he couldn't"

"Troublesome woman..."

"Just let her drink today and tomorrow you talk to her" Neji said at the same time Lee, Tenten and Hinata approached the table.

"You're late, Neji! Where is your power of youth?" Lee greeted "You should quit this dark outfit and wear some youthful colour!"

"Hey, Neji!" Tenten was smiling happily and Hinata was quiet.

They drank their sake fast, feeling the great sensation of inebriation start to fill their bodies and minds. Sakura started asking about the bond, and talking lazily in her tired tone. As always, she complained about Sasuke's lateness. Yes, because since he came back to Konoha after the war he started to be a lot like Kakashi-sensei: he was always the last one to arrive.

Shikamaru looked bored, watching Ino dance with Naruto happily; too drunk to care if every man in the pub was devouring her with his eyes... So Choji finally appeared and sat with them.

"We should talk to her tomorrow" he said, without greeting "She's not ok..."

"Hn."

"How's the bond going? Kiba told me, are you two ok?"

"As much as we can be."

"Sorry about that, man, you will do just fine, you will see," he smiled slightly. Choji was such a good friend. He went to order some food and they went silent, since Lee and Tenten were dancing and Sakura was talking with Hinata.

"Enjoying the party?" Neji asked quietly.

"Not at all."

"We can leave, I would be glad"

"As we're already here, we should enjoy it a little, what do you think about some bottoms up?"

Shikamaru grinned and Neji couldn't stop a small smile and accept the idea. Naruto brought them two new bottles and tiny glasses with Ino on his heels. He was trying to take care of her, and it was nice.

Both brunettes smiled at their drinks and exchange a confident grin.

"Whenever you say" Nara muttered dangerously.

"Hinata-sama, can you count the shots, please?"

"Nii-san you shouldn't do this, you know"

"Drink to forget, Hinata." Shikamaru said, without dropping their glance.

"Whatever." She sighed "Start drinking, I will keep the count."

They swallowed the first shot and pouted together, pouring some more sake after and drinking again, they did the same thing again and again, without stopping to breathe or take a pause. The alcohol quickly went down their throats. He could hear Sakura's laugh and Ino's cheers, Naruto's loud voice was counting the shots aloud, Kiba was with him, his stupid sentences as loud as the blonde's voice.

Then they stopped. Bottoms up. Naughty grins on their lips. They looked at each other, Shikamaru gave the jounin a full smile that made Neji roar low and bit his lower lip. Nara looked at his mouth noticing his teeth in his pink flesh and went very still. He could kiss him right there, taste his lips again, prove to the Hyuuga that he would never push him back either. That annoying feeling beating in his head, heavy in his chest...

Neji fingered his hair in a sensual move that made Shikamaru snort heavily; their eyes connection being noticed by some other shinobis at the table.

"Fuck, you look like a couple desperate for sex!" Kiba shouted.

Neji turned to the dog-nin, glaring dangerously at him.

"Why don't you shut up, birthday-boy?" he asked, containing the rage.

"But it's truuuuue!" he laughed "Like reeeally desperate!"

"Fine, I'm going to the toilet" Shikamaru said, not wanting to listen to Kiba's stupidities, not letting Neji kick the boy's ass.

He and Neji walked the corridor in the back of the pub and the Hyuuga stayed outside door as they checked the distance between it and the first partition.

Shikamaru got inside, his head spinning, the sake making some nice effect, he felt warm and fine, he almost could shove his irritation with the drunken Yamanaka away. He listened the door opening and thought it was Neji, so he stayed quiet and finished peeing. The steps stopped just behind him and Nara smirked.

"Looks like you have a Hyuuga bodyguard," the velvet voice made Shikamaru shiver, it was really close to him, and he managed to close his zipper before turning his body to face the man.

He was dressing his jounin outfit, bangs over his face and a malicious smirk on his lips.

"Fashionably late, Uchiha."

He grinned at Shikamaru with his midnight black eyes travelling his comrade's lazy face. Then he walked and entered the second partition and started talking again:

"Tell me the news"

"We got stuck" he explained, washing his hands and leaning against the bathroom door "Troublesome shit."

"As always, trouble precedes you."

"Hn."

"How bonded?"

"Chakras one, two and four…"

Uchiha turned around, closing his trousers, a strange smirk in his lips, making him look dangerous.

"You're _so _fucked."

"Thanks, badass" he snorted "Everybody has the same reaction and I still don't get it…"

"Because you're a lazy prick"

"Nice to hear it, bastard."

The man walked to him, watching Shikamaru stay quiet in his place. Sasuke put his hands on the door, caging the Nara inside his arms.

"Want to know why everybody has the same reaction to your stupid bond?"

Nara looked at him, his lazy lids heavy by the alcohol.

"I will show you."

And as fast as he said that, his body was pressing Shikamaru against the door. Sasuke's heavy breaths in his neck, hand running over his frame, fingers caressing his toned chest, lips rubbing the shell of his ear.

"Sasuke, get lost!" he hissed.

"Don't lie, you're eager to know that..."

"Quit the bullshit!"

Sasuke smirked against his skin, nibbling his throat in a feather like rub, making the alcohol and Shikamaru's hormones awake, arousing his controlled groin to twist slightly at the touch. He put his hands on Sasuke's chest and tried to push it in vain, the bastard was way stronger than him.

"What do you think you're doing? Stop it, Uchiha!"

"Not yet" he muttered in Nara's earlobe nipping it with his sharp teeth "Let's teach the lazy boy..." he continued, one hand between his legs "Second chakra..."

The hand stroked Shikamaru's cock through the fabric, sending strong vibrations into his hips, the soft touch becoming harder, arousing him despite his efforts, moving fingers making him half stiff in a second.

"Sasuk-"

"_Sex_..." he murmured licking the spot behind his ear "Amounts of nerves connections... lovely dots that can make you go wild in a slight touch..."

His hand stroked again and Shikamaru hissed, feeling a raw pleasure start to grow hard in his groins, making him breathe heavily.

_Fucking Uchiha! _

"_Pleasure_..." another thrust and Nara closed his eyes, his trousers becoming really uncomfortable "You're connected by a strong line between control and instinct..." the tricky tongue ran over his jaw, making Shikamaru tense his muscles instinctively. "So pleasure are connected... Sensitivity making you both shiver with a touch..."

"Uchiha, I will kill y-"

A loud moan fled from his parted lips, feeling Sasuke's body bump with his, shoving their hips together in a not modest way at all. The roll in their waists growing with Uchiha's pace.

"If you get aroused, Hyuuga gets aroused. If you wanna cum he will have the same raw desire..." his tongue played with the small earring.

The words mixed with his senses, and he couldn't completely understand because his attention was not in his brain at all, he was feeling dizzy and it felt so good.

_Wait!_

A strong shiver covered his body, and it wasn't lust, it was comprehension.

_So our sex instincts and senses are bound together..._

"_Pleasure_ is such a good thing, don't you think?" he smirked on his ear, making Shikamaru groan again, trying to push him away, he was not enjoying the game anymore, he knew when to stop a dangerous Shoji match. "And _pleasure_ is something that can bond people together... Hormones... Oxytocin... Luxury... _Desire_..."

Sasuke started caressing Nara's cock again with his hand, stroking hard, driving Shikamaru to stop breathing for a second just to remember he should pull air into his lungs again.

"And _pleasure_ leads us to _Feelings_. Oh yes, this one is such a trouble maker..." he bit Shikamaru's clavicle strongly but not enough to leave a mark "Make us strong and weak at the same time... If you feel, he possibly will feel too... I'm not sure how strongly bonded you are..."

"What- nh... you tal-talking ab-out?"

"Follow the clues, lazy genius... _Sex_... _Pleasure_..."

_Fuck!_

His head was spinning, he couldn't handle to think and feel and breath at the same time he worked hard to control his body, he needed strength to fight Sasuke, to push him back... He didn't want it...

_Troublesome Uchiha! _

"If you want it, he will want as much as you do, Shikamaru..." he continued his hand movements, talking sexily into his eardrums.

"Get... Off... Me..."

Shikamaru could hear the loud music, his senses getting stunned; he was feeling dizzy and horny and- _Shit_!

"Now he must be in the other side of this door, with his hard cock inside his pants..." Oh what a great mental image!

"_No!_" he hissed.

"Yes... You're following now... _Sex_ and _pleasure_" he stroked again and Shikamaru moaned loudly, his voice being muffled by the music outside "And it leads us to _feelings_..."

_Fuck- shit... nh... Stupid sake!_

"Here, down deep in your troublesome heart, mixed with so much desire and wonder..." Sasuke stopped licking his throat, brushing his lips on his earlobe again "You will not deny it... you will not be able to disclaim such powerful feelings here inside... And it leads us to the _troublesome _last thing..."

They heard punches on the door, the loud music, the nasty touch that was starting to withdraw, stopping the pace and letting Shikamaru recover his senses fast. But Sasuke's words were driving him crazy, he was not understanding that, what the hell was he talking about? So Neji was rock hard right now or what? He felt Uchiha step back, dropping their body contact, just letting his head lean in Nara's shoulder, to make sure he would listen to him, even if he was not touching the man anymore.

"What it leads to?" the Nara sighed, afraid.

Shikamaru was scared with the evolution of all those hormones and alcohol and Sasuke's lips brushing his earlobe again. The jabs became insistent on the wooden door, and the confusion, the doubts, the answer he needed to hear was killing him, yearning to finish the Shoji match and watch his Queen's death. But his own deductions were driving him mad. _Sex, Pleasure, Feelings_... was troublesome enough to make him freeze, rounded by the loud music, the hard punches on the door and the hush of blood in his eardrums. Remembering each clue Uchiha gave to him, listening inside his genius brain the pawns moving dangerously, cracking into the Shoji board inside his head, in a checkmate situation...

And Sasuke killed the Queen with one single word:

"_Love_."

**-TBC-**

**N/A:HÁ! Do you like it? *-* **I'm sorry about **Sasuke** -.- I needed a fucking badass, and no one better than this stupid bastard! Please don't freak out, I will explain about him in some follower chapter, I promise!

**THANK YOU SO MUCH EVERYONE WHO REVIEWED IT!** I receive less reviews than the other one, but anyway thank you for who has took their time to let me know if you're liking it! ;) loads of cotton candy for your hearts in return :D

I know you want the **lemon rated chapter - which is the next one -** so you better **review** this one to have it! Oh, and what do you think about the true behind the **Chakra Bond**? ^^ did you like it? Leave me some reviews with all your thoughts, Sweeties! *-*

**Love, Love and Love**

**Tai xxxx**

**REVIEW IF YOU WANT SOME HORNY LEMON ;)**

**PD.: **if you like** SasuNaru **I wrote a** PWP for Halloween **with them (and a little help from Neji!) so if you wanna read it's in my profile page! It's named:** Because It's Halloween!**


	6. Reaching You

**Disclaimer: **I don't own **Naruto**, otherwise** ShikaNeji **would be canon.

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><p><strong>THANK YOU SO MUCH SWEETIES, I'M SO HAPPY WITH YOUR LOVELY REVIEWS!<br>****A LATE HAPPY XMAS AND NEW YEAR! *hugs***

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><p><strong>AN:** ok, you can kill me if you want. **I'M SORRY**. I know it took much longer than everybody was expecting, but I have my reasons. First of all, my beta was without internet and you all know that _English is NOT my mother tongue, _so I didn't publish before because I was waiting for the beta-ed chapter. I know that it sucks, but I'm not going to publish just to read loads of reviews about how bad my English is. Well, the other thing is: I moved from Spain to Brazil and I'm still setting me back - which is kind difficult after 3 years living abroad. So yes, I'm Brazilian, I was living in Spain and now I'm back home! So please, excuse the delay x.x It was a really busy month for me!

**WARNING: LEMON CHAPTER. Ferris** asked about **Tokuma's branch**, and as it is not in the manga/anime I decided that in this fic he is from the Bouke (the lower house) as Neji.

**Beta: PlugInSarah **^^ thanks dear!

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><p><strong>When Shadows Surround You<strong>

_Chapter Six_

**Reaching You**

Neji was leaning against the wall, watching Yamanaka grab another drink with Choji on her heels. He stole the glass and poured the liquor on the floor; making the girl yell at him and look pissed. She was shouting, pouting and fingering her hair in annoyance. Ino started walking away from Choji, angry at him, angry at the world, Neji could sense it now, a crackling lack of feeling, or was it a huge amount of confusing emotions? He couldn't say exactly.

She walked toward the hallway.

"Yamanaka!" he called, drawing her attention, making her raise her brow and walk to him.

"Hyuga, decided to dance with me?" she asked, lifting thin eyebrows and looking tremendously attractive.

_What is this, Yamanaka?_

"What's happening with you? You look out of character."

"Maybe I'm being myself for the first time;" she murmured with an odd smile.

"So, how was the mission?" he asked, looking normal to anyone else's eyes, but trying to read the blond woman in front of him.

She looked away and leaned against the wall in the other side of the hallway. Something in the line of her shoulders made him see the crack, the point of the iceberg.

"What did they do to you?" he asked sharply; making her eyes widen, fear appearing in her iris.

"W-what did Tokuma-san t-tell you?"

"Nothing. But he was so shattered I could sense his chakra... He was apologizing for not saving you during his sleep... Yamanaka, what happened?"

She crossed the distance between them and looked at him fiercely.

"Nothing, Hyuga. You better not try to make me talk," she said with a dangerous glare. "You're not my friend, you don't even know me, and it's none of your business!"

"You're Shikamaru's friend," he stated.

"And you're just his bond-mate...I don't give a shit about you, so do me a favor and forget whatever Tokuma babbled in his sleep."

Her hands were shaking, gripping hard on his black t-shirt, and her eyes were burning with rage flames. She was afraid of someone discovering what happened, he could sense it. Neji put his hand around her shaking fingers, holding them.

"I will say nothing to Shikamaru if you're so afraid of him discovering. But..." she bit her lip, controlling the shake and her eyes were blinking to withdraw the tears "You can't keep it to yourself, or you will fall into darkness, _Ino._" She trembled, her fingers relaxing their grip, her chin shaking so much she looked like a little girl, lost and scared. "You can tell me if you want, if it helps you..."

"No!" and the crack was there, in her broken voice, like an acute pain, making the tears roll free.

"You don't need to be ashamed, _Ino_. I will not judge you..."

"Don't, Hyuga..." she muttered, her voice barely audible with all that loud music "Can't-"

"Fuck the protocol!" he sighed "Konoha doesn't need shattered ninjas, it needs really good ones... Don't let it tear you or traumatize you... Talk to me!"

"I CAN'T!" she shouted, but the lively music muffled her tears and sobs.

"Tell me Yamanaka! At least who did it to you?" he asked, pulling her into his arms and looking inside her eyes "C'mon, talk to me!"

"I- I did..." he said weakly, swallowing and trembling.

"And what did you do?"

"No! Neji please!" she was completely torn with her frightened eyes blinking non-stop "Just- please... let it be... is in the past... I don't nee-"

"You need help!"

"I don't!"

"Speak with Shikamaru, Ino, he will help you, or Akimichi, or Haruno, they are your friends."

"No please! They...will not...understand." She lowered her head, looking at her hands on his chest "Thanks, but...I don't need help...I am not weak anymore."

"So why are you like this?"

"Because I overcame my limits" she said firmly, her eyes looking into of his again.

He saw in her the same look he used to see in his own white eyes: emptiness, rage, yearning for vengeance and the will to surpass the boundaries even if it is going to destroy you inside.

_You're lost Yamanaka... _

"How much did it cost you?" he asked, feeling a strange sensation in his groin, a heat-wave down his spine.

_What the-_

"My pride."

And as soon as she said that, her eyes became cold and shattered, trying to hide all the pain she was feeling inside. Neji blinked at her, feeling the loss, feeling how wrong those two words sounded on her pretty lips, on her doll face and in her sweet eyes. He needed to help her, needed to do something, or she would lose herself in somberness and sorrow.

_I can't allow you to do that..._

"Help yourself" he said, his voice sounding strangely husky with the strong desire burning in his lower member, getting stiff quickly. "If you can't find you inside your heart, I will be here Yamanaka and I will stand by you."

"Why are you doing that?" Her voice sounded disgusted, "You don't even know me!"

He held her hand, not letting her escape.

_What the hell is Shikamaru doing inside this bathroom? _

"Been there done that."

She nodded and allowed her head to fall into his chest and breathe, calming down and feeling a little bit better. Then she left a strangled sound escape her mouth and looked at him.

"Hyuga you're hard!" she seemed stressed.

"It's the bond," he explained and she calmed down again. "Shikamaru is doing something stupid in the bathroom."

"Alone?" she smirked "Maybe he is thinking about you..." she provoked, looking a little better and her tipsy tone was back.

"Uchiha."

"Ugh, troublesome..." she muttered, smiling nasty.

"Beg your pardon?"

"Never expect good things from Sasuke; he's mean sometimes"

She smiled, stepping back. Neji felt rage in his chest. So was like this? Shikamaru would get laid in the bathroom while Neji was outside waiting like a stupid servant?

_The fuck!_

Neji turned around in a fast movement and punched the door.

_What the hell?_

He sensed Ino leaving and punched again.

"You son of a bitch!" he shouted to the door, punching it hard.

Was he...jealous?

_It cannot be!_

The strange feeling mixed with the arousal inside his boxers; and he painfully jabbed the door again.

_Will not allow you to do that, you idiot!_

Was Shikamaru insane? Was he that selfish? What the fuck was he thinking? Having sex in a public toilet? With the Uchiha bastard?

"Fuck!"

His hands were shaking, heat crawled all over his body, desire and sin mixing in his groin. Oh, Shikamaru so deserved to die! His chest twisted in rage, panic, jealousy, he couldn't stand the stupid feeling of being left behind. He was going to kill both of the bastards, they were asking for it!

"I'm so going to kill you, Nara!" he growled and punched one last time, making the door swing open.

-x-

"Love."

_WHAT THE FUCK?_

"WHAT?"

Sasuke walked to the sink and started washing his hands, laughing at him.

"You listened. Good, so I caught your attention..." he smiled and turned off the tap."Now I'm going to take care of Sakura, she's completely drunk"

Shikamaru stepped aside, letting Sasuke open the punched door and leave.

The bond was doing that to them and Neji didn"t even care to tell him? He felt anger possess his senses and walked through the frame door, looking at a panting Hyuga. He looked completely furious.

"What the fuck?" he shouted, making Shikamaru smirk. So that was true, they could sense each other's sin and luxury.

"What the fuck?" He asked, disgusted. "You knew all this time that we could sense each other desires and you didn't say a word?" Shikamaru was totally pissed off.

"Are you blaming me for your sex games with that bastard making me get hard?"

"Oh, so it's true, you're horny!"

"Shut up! You're a selfish prick! Do you think it's nice to have sex or whatever you're doing inside the bathroom and leaving me here, waiting while you have fun?"

Shikamaru smirked. Was he jealous?

"I don't give a shit!" He hissed, shadows grabbing Neji's t-shirt and pushing him against the wall so forcefully that he let a choked moan depart his lips "So what's that Neji? All that yesterday was just this bond bullshit or you have another explanation for what happened?"

"Don-"

"Oh, now I see, you were so worried about Tokuma that you forgot to explain to me about that part of the story!" Shikamaru said sarcastically.

"It's not like that!"

"Are you laughing at me? Is this funny for you?" he muttered.

"No it's not, in fact dealing with you is a big pain in the ass!" Neji yelled back.

Shikamaru laughed madly, making the shadows around them get thick and dense, driving Neji to a weird strangled sensation. It was all around him and his body felt sick and tired while he fought against the sensation.

"What do you think you're doing?"

Shikamaru smirked.

"Control yourself, that's not funny at all!" Neji warned.

"For you..."

"YOU BASTARD!" he shouted trying to grab Shikamaru's shadows wrists feeling just the dense energy with his strong fingers "Get off me!" He ordered, trying to control his rage.

"You wish!"

"I will hurt you!" his Byakugan activated by itself.

"No you will not!"

"FUCK YOU NARA!"

"Nara-_dono_" and his expression was filled with a sadistic pleasure that drove Neji mad.

"Are you nuts?"

"Say it!"

Neji pushed Shikamaru, they bumped into the other wall, growling together in pain, as their chests shocked, pressing Neji's hands in the Nara's shoulders to keep him in place.

"Why are you acting like this?" Neji asked, his doujutsu making him see all the strong chakra that Nara was moving around them, getting denser each second.

"Why did you lie to me?"

"I didn't!"

"So why didn't you explain the fucking bond to me?"

"I told you it was troublesome!"

"You should have been more specific, Hyuga!" he grabbed Neji's elbows and pressed till they hinged.

Neji moved harshly, pushing Shikamaru again against the wall, fighting his hands, feeling the strong grip on his elbows, trying to pull his hands away from Nara's shoulders.

"You're weak," his voice sounded evil as he built up some chakra in his hands, making Shikamaru wince in pain.

"Not enough to lose to you" he hissed, shadows hands pressing over Neji's throat "You're so selfish you didn't even care about telling me..." he was upset, his tipsy rough voice sounded bitter "About explaining all this sex-pleasure-feelings-_love_thing!"

"_Love_? Are you crazy?" he hissed, feeling his throat hurt with the pressure "What that- hn- Nara- get... off- need... nh... breathe"

Shikamaru loosened the grip on Neji's neck, but kept holding it. Looking inside those pale eyes, seeing confusion and anger mixed with a light touch of drunkenness.

"What did that stupid Uchiha tell you? _Love_? _Feelings_?" he muttered, his voice even rougher than before, his vocal chords hurting, panting for air.

"The bond can lead us to that!"

"No it can't!"

"Why would Sasuke would lie to me?" he asked suspiciously.

"Because he's a bastard!"

Shikamaru laughed at him, fastening the grip again, making Neji choke and press his shoulder blades till they ached in pain, as he was cutting it with his fingertips, the jounin was using chakra, making Shikamaru's fingers release his elbows with the dots the Hyuga was pressing.

"You're using your chakra on me!"

"You're using your fucking shadows to strangle me!" Neji hissed, feeling the release not just in his elbows but in his neck too "You're such a brat!"

"Why did you lie to me!" the Nara asked, almost yelling, wanting to understand why.

"I was afraid it would influence you..." the older said low, starting to free the other's shoulders.

"Why would it?"

"What happened in the kitchen, wasn't bond influenced..." the voice murmured, drawing air heavily in sequence "Before Tokuma appeared... or in your mother's house... it wasn't the bond..."

"So-" Nara stopped, feeling his forehead being pressed by Neji's headband "What... was it?"

Shikamaru felt Neji's breath against his, their noses touching slightly, both panting with exhaustion, chakra loss, and alcohol in their systems. His hands reached around Neji's waist, stroking it, feeling the elder's hands against the wall beside his head, now his white eyes were closed with a surrendering expression on his face, making him look even more beautiful.

"Do you feel it?" Neji's voice was like a whisper of wind, fresh and hard even if it's low "I'm not aroused now, you're not either... So what's _this?_"

"_This_what?" Shikamaru hissed dumbly.

_This will to kill the distance and reach you..._

"_This..._"

Neji rocked their bodies together, making Shikamaru moan in surprise and pain with the sudden friction on his half hard arousal. Their lips brushed for a second in a very delicate touch before they leaned into each other, finally sealing the so wanted kiss. They increased the touch of their mouths, pressing lips harshly, losing all delicacy on behalf of their growing arousal. They roughly grabbed each other's clothes, pulling their chests, waists and faces even closer, like there was a deep need to be in contact with the other, to feel the other's body, the other's warmth around them, to know that it was real and not another bond-influenced trick. Neji parted his lips, forcing Shikamaru to do the same, an inebriated feeling filling their senses while that mind blowing tobacco taste was driving the Hyuga even madder. They reached for each other's tongue, sliding them together, moaning softly with the amazing feeling of kissing the other man _once more_. They kept dancing with their tongues, sucking hard and biting it just to discover the details of the other's flavour.

Neji couldn't understand what the feeling was or that need to seek the other's body or the inebriated feeling of kissing Shikamaru, tangling their tongues together and pressing their bodies harshly. He wanted to break the spell of this fucking bond influence at the same time he didn't want to think that it was the bond.

Shikamaru grabbed Neji's back pulling him toward him, their bodies flush together, feeling the cold wall behind him and the shadows around them. It was crazy and intense, the way his fingers squeezed against the fabric of Neji's clothes and his arms embraced the toned body as if he was afraid of losing the contact.

Their tongues were fighting and dancing without choreography, learning by instinct where to move and when to suck, how to bite their lips and moan in pleasure. It was animalistic and raw, the desire exploding in their chests, making it difficult to handle inside their underwear, that now were stuffed and in pain.

Each second was burning fast with their tongues reaching for more space and more dominance, fighting to tear each other's resistance.

Neji felt the heat of their pressed bodies, the sexy movements of Shikamaru's fingers pulling his hair and shoving their mouths together. He wanted to tear him; it was a kind of a homicidal desire to kill him in pleasure, listening to his groans of delight and sobs of hardness. So he rocked their hips together again and again, making Shikamaru scream inside their kiss and hurt his scalp dragging his hair out.

The kiss broke; both gasping for air, panting hard and brushing their lips in desire.

"I want to release this bond and never feel it again..." the chunin muttered, feeling his thick member throb in pain and need "Don't want to see you ever again..." his voice whispered bitterly, at the same time he rolled his hips against the jounin.

"Nh..." Neji couldn't think; it was extreme, almost painful to think about it with all that raw pleasure under his clothes with their hard movements against each other bodies "Fine-"

Shikamaru bit his own lip when he felt their arousals rubbing, pain and pleasure inside his tight trousers making him pant. He closed his eyes, feeling Neji's tongue devour with open mouth kisses across his jaw, biting his bone with his fangs, making the Nara shiver with the fucking hot sensation; the tongue playing with his earlobe, the air wasn't obeying to go into his nostrils.

_Nhg... Gods... So good!_

"Let's get out of here" Neji snarled, lips brushing sensually in his skin, making Shikamaru forget to think and just nodded, starting to follow the Hyuga across the pub, whispering to Choji to walk Ino home later and listening to Neji say the same thing about Hinata for Shino.

And in two minutes they were climbing roofs, their speed hindered by the alcohol and the volume in their trousers. They reached the Hyuga's house in a flash and toed their sandals off, Neji's hands grabbing Shikamaru's t-shirt and removing it, throwing the cloth on the floor, pressing the younger against the first wall he saw in the lobby.

"Shit, Neji!" he hissed, feeling the moist tongue lick his chest's skin and coming up again to suck hard on his throat.

Oh it was _so good_Shikamaru could die of lust, his cock demanding attention. He just needed to please himself and everything would be ok.

"You want to release it, isn't it?" the husky tone made Shikamaru tremble.

"Oh yeah..."

"Take off your clothes." It was an order and without thinking Shikamaru opened his trousers and dropped them and his underwear with a fast action, his throbbing cock feeling amazing with the cold air around it, the freedom of his deep instincts.

Neji sighed with the view and needed to control himself not to jump on him. He took off his black t-shirt and trousers in a second and grabbed Shikamaru's wrist, pulling him across the living room and hallway, reaching his own room so fast he could have run unaware.

He was trying not to shove Shikamaru against some wall and fuck him good and hard. He knew that if they started kissing again he couldn't stop himself, he would not have strength enough to control the increasing desire and the lust and the fucking blood running across his length making his cock throb in pain.

"We will release it now" he snarled roughly and the young man moaned in anticipation feeling Neji drop the grip around his wrist and walk four steps just to turn around and look inside his eyes with lust "We'll... need your shadows now..."

"For what?" his mind was slow and his cock was not cooperating, neither were his eyes as they narrowed on Neji's bare dick.

_Shit, so sexy! _

"To release!" he said obviously, getting impatient with the other shinobi and with his own arousal, it was difficult to think straight like this "You... bind our shadows and let me _manipulate_ it" it was almost erotic to say these words, his brain working fast to forget the lust and keep his senses in what he was about to do "To _release_the chakra bond"

_Chakra bond? _

Shikamaru needed some other kind of release right now!

"I'm drunk!" Shikamaru snapped back, licking his bottom lip in a nervous act.

"Me too, let's do it fast, tomorrow will be a better day-"

"Can't!"

"The hell, Shikamaru!" couldn't he just cooperate? Neji was working hard to try to forget his lust.

"Drunk _and_aroused, too troublesome" he bit his lip, hard. Shit, he wanted so much to bite all of Neji's body.

"Try it!" Neji hissed, controlling his own legs to not run to the young man and rape him right there.

"Fine!"

_Troublesome Hyuga!_

He made some seals, and felt his shadows around him, embracing Neji's dark lines on the floor, the light of the moon lightening the room in a dense sensation of appropriate moment to do anything other than release a_ chakra bond_.

"Done" he muttered figuring out how to keep the shadows within his inebriate state.

"Let me manipulate you" Neji ordered and Shikamaru did all his efforts to pass the order to his shadows, scratching the idea about a significant double-meaning in those words.

"Try now..."

Neji moved his hands, making Shikamaru do the same.

"It's good" he answered "Now you need to put some chakra in your fingers, do you know how to do that?"

"Of course I know, you prick!"

Shikamaru exhaled shakily and started to focus his chakra in the tip of his fingers, his right hand brushing his lips when Neji did the same to activate his Byakugan. Black, grey and white clouding the Hyuga's perspective, looking for the dots of chakra that needed his entire attention. The man breathed, feeling the drunkenness disturb his senses, but focused again, even if his cock was aching in his groin.

_Fuck..._

"First our chests" he warned in a shaky tone "Keep the chakra in your fingertips and when I press it, make it go inside your skin, understand?"

_I want so badly to get under your skin, Shikamaru..._

"Think so..."

It was a really nice view, Neji lowering his hand through his bare muscular chest, fingers skimming the skin to find the exactly point, and Shikamaru's own fingers were doing the same, as they were Neji's and that was incredibly hot, he could feel the touch and at the same time watch it in that pale fur, shining with the light of the moon...

_So fucking arousing... _

He felt the two fingers pressing his own flesh and closed his eyes, almost loosing the chakra.

"Focus, Shikamaru" the husky tone brought him back, opening his eyes he saw those pearly iris narrowing over his fingers. Neji was struggling to maintain his own chakra, Shikamaru could see that in the pulsating veins around his white eyes "Insert the chakra..."

And Shikamaru did it, as he needed that so badly, feeling small shocks over the spot sparkling around it, fulfilling his abdomen and full being. It was an incredible sensation, peaceful and exciting at the same time, looking at the concentrated expression on Neji's face, a corner of his eye watching Neji's hard dick... He wanted so much to kill the distance, to take that man in his own hands and make him scream his name loudly...

"Slowly, Nara..." he conducted him, making Shikamaru's chakra obey his voice without thinking.

A heat wave flooded his ribs, warm and nice, pleasurably making his eyes shut again, to feel the touch and his own chakra in his bare chest.

"Nice... Slow..." the low tone made him shiver again sensing the lust in Neji's words with a small tremble, alcohol and warmth inside their chests. "What are you feeling?"

_Stupid question... _

Shikamaru hissed, looking angrily into Neji's eyes.

"Need to know if it's going ok" he explained impatiently, blushing at the same time he tried not to note his eagerness to listen the answer.

"Voyeur!" he muttered, biting his lip and closing his eyes once again "Warm... Calm... Extremely aroused..."

Neji grinned at Shikamaru's delighted expression. It was going just fine, they were going to do it well and the next day they would be some more steps away...

"We will do... the same in the other two chakra points" he warned, loosening the pressure in the dot in their chests and trailing his fingers with more strength than necessary just to watch that gorgeous expression in Nara's face, descending across their abs, bellybutton and hips.

Neji breathed slowly to calm down, it was hard to watch and maintain the focus in his Byakugan view. He lifted his left hand and grabbed his own stuffed cock, causing Shikamaru to do the same.

"Hng..." the low moan came from Nara's mouth making Neji sigh and wait. Shit, the young man was driving him crazy, making him bite his own lower lip and want to kiss all that tanned body and run his tongue across every single inch of skin...

So he rolled his fingers even lower, skimming his velvet sacks and watching Shikamaru groan sexily, opening his lusty eyes and fixing it in Neji's hand, hiding between his parted legs.

_So... difficult to handle..._

Shikamaru wanted to quit the game and jump on him, but it was not right, they needed to release the bond, they were going to feel better after that...

_Just a little bit longer..._

"We... will do the same procedure..." panting heavily the Hyuuga tried to keep doing the stupid thing just right, and it was being difficult, so fucking difficult...

"Hn..."

Neji pressed to fingers on his own perineum, reaching the chakra dot easily.

"Now" he ordered.

Shikamaru started to emit the chakra with his fingers and-

"Gods..." Neji whispered, almost dropping his Byakugan with the warm and pleasurable feeling in his erogenous zone.

_So. Fucking. Delicious._

Shikamaru tilted his head back, looking at the ceiling and feeling painfully aroused, one hand clutching his sacks and cock while the other pressed chakra in his velvet perineum. It was hot, not just warm, it was burning to no end, it was incredibly delicious, and he was having a lot of trouble maintaing the shadows.

Neji was losing it, he was dropping the fucking doujutsu, he couldn't handle it anymore, he was rock hard in his hand and feeling that immense turn on, he was panting unevenly, seeking air, his chest heaving heavily without control.

So he closed his eyes, feeling the chakra fulfill all his lower points and dropped the pressure, craving focus inside his clouded mind. Shit, it was hard, it was painful... He bit the tip of his tongue and opened his eyes to find lustful irises narrowing onto his hands.

"Just... wait- a sec" Neji muttered licking his lips and reactivating his Byakugan.

His hand dropped his sacks smoothly and full handled the thick member lifting it, biting hard on his bottom lip.

"Last one..." he whispered, almost happy to end this.

Shikamaru was panting so heavy his uneven breaths weren't capable of filling his lungs properly. He felt the pressure in the bottom of his shaft and moaned loudly, closing his eyes heavily.

"N-now!" it sounded more like a raw groan and made Shikamaru bite his lip feeling the chakra on his cock.

"Shit!" he moaned again "Just... Oh- God!"

Neji lost his grip and his Byakugan deactivated, he closed his eyes again, just to experience the fucking mind blowing sensation. God, it was like heaven, like loosing all control and letting go:

So he lost it _completely_.

The Hyuga felt his own right hand moving from the bottom of his cock to the tip, slowly but strongly, caressing it with desire, forgetting completely about what he was doing till his throat growled in pleasure.

He opened his eyes harshly with the sounds of Shikamaru's moans and understood: He was not controlling the moves of his body anymore, he was being controlled by the younger man, and hell it was good, it was delicious and horny. He watched Shikamaru running his hand on his shaft, looking at him doing the same thing.

"S-stop... fuck- hn- IT!" he growled, his feral voice sounding impatient "Wha- doin'-?"

"Shhh... enjoy- _N_-_Neji"_

_FUCK!_

Shikamaru's voice sounded so fucking sexy, biting his lips, eyes on Neji's cock, jerking off in the same pace the Nara was leading, back to his shadow's control. Arousing making their dicks twist in pleasure and pain with hunger for being released, a hunger that Neji couldn't stand much longer.

It was totally mind blowing, it was like Shikamaru's hand on his shaft, strongly thrusting it, his thumb sliding in the head with the luscious pre-cum.

_So. Fucking. Good! _

He needed to touch Shikamaru, or at least to do that in his own race, controlling his reactions...

"Release me!" Neji hissed.

"Almost... t-there..."

"Shikamaru!"

"Can't... too good-" he moaned, watching Neji "Look at you... Gods... Hn-"

"Let. Me. Go. Now!"

Shikamaru felt Neji's attempt of escape and he lost it closing his eyes, it was too troublesome to take care of everything with all his attentions in his own rock hard cock... But his heartbeat increased painfully with what he felt.

-x-

Neji felt Shikamaru's shadows release his body, his hand stopping the thrusts since he wasn't being controlled anymore. The Nara was there, just four steps from him; closed eyes, one hand in his shaft thrusting it non-stopping, teeth biting hard his lower lip. It was an image to be saved in his retinas, burning inside his chest, adrenaline running across Neji's body.

_Can't control it anymore-_

Fast large steps and he reached Shikamaru, shoving the younger shinobi's hand away from his cock and replacing it with his own hand making the chunin almost shout. Neji wanted it since the first minute they kissed in the pub. That crazy lust in his so precious blood making him pant, feeling the stretched skin of Nara's stiff limb under his long fingers, making his heartbeat stop just to keep beating a second after.

_What is this?_

Kami-sama should be joking with his fate, all those uncontrollable emotions in his heart and the lustful images in his mind. His fate has never been good to him, ever; but now was different, it was burning Neji inside, making his eyes go blind with arousal, those loud moans sounding like music in his eardrums. He was going to devour Shikamaru and it couldn't be stopped, that amount of raw pleasure was fated to beat them...

"Shikamaru..." he growl into the chunin's ear, brushing his swollen lips over the tan skin "You shouldn't have released me..."

Midnight black eyes blinked, back to reality, suppressing a loud moan from escaping his parted lips when the older started nibbling his throat and biting it as he wanted to tear his skin with pearly fangs craving the skin wildly. What the hell was he doing? Shit! He was completely naked with Hyuga Neji's hand around his dick, thrusting strongly but too slowly, making it painful as hell, torturing Shikamaru with each stroke.

"Why?" he asked teasingly, his right hand grasping Neji's hair and pulling it hard bringing the milky eyes to stare at him, red parted lips driving Shikamaru crazy with just the sight, he rocked their mouths together, teeth bruising lips making the Hyuga scream painfully at the same time his lower lip started to bleed into Shikamaru's strong bite, feeling the man suck hard on his bruise, reaching for his blood while his hands grabbed Neji's buttocks bringing him too close, making their arousals grind painfully "Tell me why, _Neji_..." he muttered against Neji's lips, the husky tone receiving a pervy grin in response.

"Because- ngh!" their throbbing arousals thrusted against each other, making the Hyuga lose his mind, hands running across that muscled chest feeling the scars in the skin, rubbing their hips even more roughly, sucking hard on his clavicle leaving small bloody dots as a dark hickey "I'm not going to... _stop_" Neji's voice sounded muffled as he spread open mouth kisses across that strong jaw of Nara's, making the chunin growl and lift him, flattened palms on Neji's firm ass, pressing hard into the flesh till he marked his fingertips in that milky silken skin.

Their tongues reached for space, meeting outside their mouths, making them groan together in pleasure and Neji wrapped his arms around Shikamaru's neck, feeling the younger man trace speed steps till the futon, making them fall heavily, their arousals rubbing together harshly as Shikamaru sat on the futon with the Hyuga sitting in his lap.

Thin milky fingers playing dangerously with the head of the lazy-nin's dick, rubbing the sticky pre-cum teasingly.

"God... Neji-" Shikamaru moaned inside Neji's mouth, slipping his moist and smoky tongue inside the elder's mouth, his hands gripping his long silky hair, pulling it hard and rolling his hips against Neji's fingers.

Shikamaru was in a hurry; he _needed_that release, that oh so needed orgasm, and he was going to get it now. His free hand clawed in the bare milky skin of the jounin's waist making him pant inside his mouth and repay the movement with a intense roll of his hips, making their dicks throb with a hot and lustful pleasure. Neji's hands grasped the loosened hairs of his bond-mate, bruising his scalp, thrusting his groin with the other's, feeling Shikamaru's body trembling under his own frame.

"God! So good!" Shikamaru almost screamed when Neji's fangs carved in his neck, sucking his pulse, increasing his heartbeat... "Hn... Need _more_!"

He swapped their positions leaning their bodies on the mattress, staying on top of Neji, rocking their cocks together, making Neji roll his eyes and grab the sheets, his dark hair spreading all over the futon like black veins and his stoic face in a sinful expression, lifting his hips against Shikamaru's.

It was a stupid trick of Neji's fatalistic luck to link them and make them want each others touch. Neji was feeling numb, his chest full with an amount of emotions he couldn't understand, groins demanding for attention, mind in a stupid attempt of understanding that situation. All Hyuga needed was answers for the questions...

_Why me and Shikamaru? Why this need for his touch?_

The jounin's mouth went dry, teeth biting his own pink lips and trying not to moan, he didn't want to show Shikamaru how that was mind blowing, or how he couldn't manage to say a full sentence without grunting painfully in ecstasy.

Neji wanted to control, to be aware of every single piece of that puzzle but he couldn't. Controlling himself was something out of his hands in that moment, with Shikamaru thrusting their arousal together in a dominant move.

_Dominance. _

And the word echoed in his brain, awaking him and making the Hyuga turn in a rough movement, almost dropping Shikamaru from the bed, sitting in his lap, immobilizing the younger man and grabbing Nara's hands upon his head against the futon. Their faces were close again and he licked those bruised lips of Shikamaru's with a sadistic light growing in his eyes.

"My way..." Neji snarled, running a hand across the bare skin of Shikamaru's forearm, scratching the tanned tone, leaning his body and brushing their lips teasingly "Do you want me to please you, _Shikamaru-dono?_"

Nara's eyes snapped open.

Shikamaru's heartbeat increased with the lustful tone, all cells of his body screaming for Neji's frame, his hands pressed against the futon and their lips brushing lasciviously. His mind was shouting for that release and he didn't care at all about the ridiculous situation they were in. He couldn't think or breathe properly, his heart pulsing as much as his groin, all his body throbbing painfully under that milky skin, those pearly eyes looking at him with desire and ecstasy. Their mouths stroked together and tongues started fighting again, sake flavour in their saliva, poisonous smoke burning in their lungs.

He didn't want to think, and even if he wanted to he couldn't. Neji's body was too intoxicating to let him complete a full sentence in his mind, those long fingers running across Shikamaru's body were making him pant and moan like a stupid teenager. Too much to bear the pleasure, too much to think straight or stop their crazy demand for that sinful aim. He needed Neji to finish him, he needed to keep listening to that hoarse voice muttering his name while his long pale fingers grabbed their cocks together making Shikamaru growl inside Neji's mouth.

Slow thrusts were driving Shikamaru to insanity, the tricky tongue travelling across his mouth, chests pressed together with intense need for each others body.

Nara groaned when Neji's hand started thrusting faster, releasing one of his wrists from Neji's grip above his head, Shikamaru grabbed painfully on those silky dark threads, satin texture on his fingers, bringing the Hyuga's body to lean even more on top, their tongues tangled in a sexy fight for lust, teeth biting, eyes shut tightly.

"God!" he groaned inside Neji's mouth, feeling the Hyuga play with their cocks, jacking them off hard. Pre-cum poured on Shikamaru's abs, making his mouth water with desire "Neji-"

The Hyuga had disconnected his mind, he didn't want to think about their lust, he didn't want to verbalize his pleasure, so he shoved his moist tongue inside Shikamaru's mouth, cutting off his sentence, stopping the flux of thoughts about how wrong it was, he just wanted to feel and forget everything, he didn't want to manage now the weird sensation they were going to experience the next day.

He rolled his waist against his own hand, then lunged even harder, Shikamaru's screams were swallowed by Neji's hungry mouth, and Hyuga's moans and pants going down Nara's throat.

The chunin arched his hips, shoving his cock against Neji's hand, feeling the sticky texture of their members, pouring their pre-cum together, making the milky fingers around them work faster, sliding easily across their soaked shafts.

"Say- it again- ng... Neji!"

The Hyuga opened his eyes, watching the raw lust inside midnight black orbs, he couldn't think, he was almost there, almost at the edge of pleasure and release, he was touching it with imaginary fingertips, reaching the devastation of pleasure.

The words climbing out his vocal chords instantly and left his swollen lips hoarsely:

"_Shikamaru-dono..._" he was breathless, sparkling lights bursting in his retinas with the loud moan down deep in Shikamaru's gorge, fingers holding painfully his long dark brown hair pulling his head back with debauchee pleasure.

"So close- ah! Neji I'm-" he stuttered lost in raw pleasure.

"Come for- me..._ Shikamaru-dono_" Neji felt the bright light in his retina blinding his vision. He was almost there.

_Almost. God. Shikamaru! SO perfect..._

"Oh. Dear. God!" Nara screamed, his other hand escaping from Neji's grip over his head, gripping the older man's hip making him move faster "I'm- Neji! FUCK- I'M COMING!"

"God! So good" Neji muttered, feeling his hands soak with milky ribbons of Shikamaru's cum, the thick liquid increasing the sensibility in his cock.

_GOD!_

Neji was numb, he was dying, he could touch the pleasure but he was feeling so torpid, his moves were slow.

_HELL NO!_

But his release came fast when Shikamaru's hand grabbed Neji's length, prodding it sharply while his other hand supported Neji's waist. The jounin bucked his back, sitting proudly on Nara's lap, his head shoved back, long silky black veins falling over his back, eyes focusing on the ceiling when the pleasure exploded down his groin.

Shikamaru was in an intense ecstasy, Neji coming was a divine image he wanted to lodge in his mind forever. Shuddering and moaning loudly, parted lips making demonic sounds echoed all over the dark room, spilling itself strongly over Shikamaru's abs, looking at the ceiling as he was praying for God.

"God..." Neji murmured dizzy, an insolent exhaustion devastating his body.

Shikamaru led the man to the futon, feeling the intense release in each limb of his body. The slow mumble in his brain dying gradually in tiredness and calm. He felt the sleep start to overcome his senses at the same time Neji pulled him closer in an instinctive movement, drunk in pleasure and numbness, fitting Shikamaru's back into his chest and embracing his waist in a tender but possessive way.

Then it was completely dark, exhaustion lulling them into a deep sleep, and Shikamaru couldn't fight against the stupid thought that hit him before falling in the shadowy valley of dreams...

_God, I'm spending the night with a lover... That's troublesome!_

* * *

><p><strong>AN:** And there it is! Hope you like it! Was it nice? hot? yummy? let me know if you like it!

mmm, some bad news (but after this hot scene I think it's ok...) I start working and studying in February, things will become busy, so if the chapters start to take too long to be published, please excuse me! I'll try my best to have AT LEAST 1 chapter per month, ok?

What do you think will happen with our lovely boys now? Leave me a review!

(Next chapter we will have some Ino story ^^ )

Love love and love!  
>Tai xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx<p> 


	7. Under My Skin

**N/A: **Ok, you can hit me if you want, I deserve it. Well, just wanted to thank you all, I loved every single review! I really hope you enjoy this new chapter, and I'm sorry about taking so long to update the fiction. All my love for you, honeys!

**Beta: **my former beta couldn't keep working with me, so I'm happy to introduce you Miss **Kuroda Miharu, **who's being such a sweetie and beta-ing from this chapter on! Thank you love!

* * *

><p><strong>When Shadows Surround You<strong>

**.**

_Chapter 7 _

**Under My Skin**

It was early morning when the annoying sound echoed throughout the house.

The sun was barely up, its weak rays of light still cold but bright shining through the clouds. The tall man grumbled against the skin in front of his mouth; he didn't want to move, he was feeling warm and still tired but the fucking doorbell rang again, making him tighten his eyelids and grab even harder in the body in front of him.

_Bad idea. _

Neji felt round buttocks against his cock and froze. _Not good at all_. Before his member start swelling he braced himself and pushed his own body out of the bed, standing up on his heels and he picked up his pajama trousers beside the futon, putting them on and starting to walk. He reached the hallway in seven long steps and continued, he was able to walk more four large strides when pain bashed his guts, shattered his chest and his lungs went out of breath escaped him.

"SHIT!" the scream was heard from the room and he remembered.

_The bond. Last night. Shikamaru._

Almost running back to the door he stuffed his head into the room and stared at a completely naked Shikamaru, laying down on his back over the tatami beside the bed, with hands hiding his eyes and legs sprawled on the floor. Neji watched the man start moving his elbows to raise his torso with pain and finally opened his midnight black eyes.

"What the hell?" he muttered, his eyes looking for the older man over the bed and finally found him looking at the door "Nice way to wake me up, Hyuga"

The doorbell rang again and Neji looked down the corridor, but sighed and turned his eyes to his bond-mate again.

"Sorry...I forgot about _it_" he explained, his hands still grabbing the door frame to suppress the pain over his body and watched the Nara stand up and look at his own body.

"God, I'm sticky!" he hissed, removing his hair of his face and putting it into a high ponytail "I stink of cum" he mumbled, realization sinking in, he raised his head and looked into those moon eyes of the Hyuga.

_Shit!_

Neji swallowed hard, feeling heat on his cheeks, blushing out of control and looked away. He bit his inner cheek and shuffled.

"Listen, someone is at the door... just put a yukata on and come with me, you can take a shower after, ok?"

His own voice sounded strange, Neji was not good dealing with this kind of situation, in fact he was terrible with the-morning-after-talk especially when he was hung-over and without any clue about what _exactly_happened last night (not the physical part - that he remembered very well, but the emotional one; he would need to put it all together to understand it).

_Gods, it was crazy..._

It was _so_ intense. _So_ unexpected. _So_out of his goddamn control.

"Who's at the door?"

The rough voice brought him back to reality and raising two fingers to his lips he activated his Byakugan.

"Akimichi Choji" he muttered.

"Thank god!" Shikamaru muttered, walking in his magnificent nudity toward the door, as if he was dressed, the Hyuga watched it with wide eyes, not daring to look down the defined abs of the Nara "What?" the younger man asked when they were toe to toe under the door frame "You already saw this, why should I hide?"

The Nara was kind of pissed off. It was not everyday that you wake up in sharp pain, smelling men sex, soaked in dry cum - completely naked - feeling that in fact nothing of this really matters, because a strong and strange buzz in your mind just keeps popping up images from the night before _without your permission_…and the images just make you feel even more pissed - because they are completely sexy and stunning.

_So I run away from it, as always. _

He crossed the Hyuga and walked through the hallway, feeling Neji on his heels and entered in the bathroom. Shikamaru opened the tap and let the water run into the sink, washing his hands, his mind in galloping thoughts he wanted to suppress but couldn't. He soaked his stomach and chest, trying at least to wash the dry cum off his skin, he new the smell wouldn't leave until he take a good shower though. He dried his body and tied the towel round his waist, turning to the man at the door.

"So…?" He muttered, without thinking about what could he say.

"I forgot about the bound, and walked away" Neji said like an apology "I walked around eleven steps, Shikamaru"

"Eleven?" he asked surprised.

"Hm. Looks like the release-thing works just fine"

"Hm"

Shikamaru didn't blush, he wasn't that kind of person - not normally - but some images filled his mind and he just breathed heavily and nodded.

"Yeah…"

_Just fine..._

The doorbell rang again and they walked through the corridor, reaching the living room. Neji opened the door and a tall and large man looked at him.

"Sorry to bother you, Hyuga-san"

"It's ok, Akimichi-san. Come on in, please" he stepped aside and let the man pass.

"Morning Shikamaru" the large man said, looking at his friend.

The lazy chuunin had a dark hickey in his clavicle and finger marks in his waists... All three men went silent...

Neji was deeply ashamed, it was an evidence that they had 'something' the night before and now Shikamaru's friend was completely aware of this. And he quickly kicked some clothes from the last night that were spread all over the floor.

Choji looked at the marks, but then looked up to meet the midnight black eyes; he didn't give a shit if his best friend was having sex or making out with the Hyuga. During the long path of their friendship they had never judged each other, never criticized their choices - just if it was dangerous or harmful. But today Choji was sure that Shikamaru was not going to do something stupid or hurt himself, so he just smirked to his friend and rubbed the nape of his neck.

"I didn't mean to interrupt anything..." he blushed a little.

"You didn't. We were sleeping."

"Ah..." the large man toed his shoes off and looked at his old friend "We need to talk."

Shikamaru rolled his eyes.

"Gosh Choji, don't you know how much I hate that sentence?"

"Yes, and in this case I hate it as much as you do"

"It seems troublesome...I'll just take a shower, do you mind making some coffee? The kitchen is right there and all stuff is on the counter"

"Fine...you will need some coffee to handle _the talk_..."

Shikamaru rolled his eyes boringly, but he knew that every time Choji needed to talk, it was a big thing. The Nara exchanged a glance with Neji and watched his beloved friend walk to the kitchen; then they went to the bathroom.

Neji stopped at the door frame when Shikamaru went in, but the young shinobi looked at him and nodded, making the Hyuga come in. He closed the door and leaned his back against it, watching Shikamaru take off the towel and turn on the shower.

"So..." he muttered without turning to see the white eyes "It works, eh?"

"Yes, four more steps..."

"Should we...do it again?"

Neji froze. The thought of doing _it_again made him shiver. Hell, was it going to be that troublesome each time they executed the releasing technique, or what?

"Maybe..." his voice sounded rough.

_Shit!_

"Look, Neji" Shikamaru turned "We were drunk. It didn't mean anything, you know that; don't need to be nervous, ok?"

_HA!_ The Nara's own hands were shaking, who was he to say that, to try to calm down his bound party and pretend it was nothing? It really _was_nothing, but that kind of nothing that you want to do again and again...and-

"Shikamaru, I'm not worried about that. I was wasted; I didn't mean to end up things that way...if I'm under my sanity and control it won't happen again" Neji said firmly, even with shaky fingers mashed in his trousers pockets.

Oh he was lying so badly. For Shikamaru. For himself. For his goddamn sense...

"Sure" Shikamaru stammered, stepping into the shower box.

His heart slamming inside his chest. Of course they would have done it just fine if they were sober...wouldn't they?

He could hear Neji walking in the bathroom and washing his hands and face under the shower sound. He was trying to maintain his appearance, for his pride's sake, trying to be as calm as he would like to be…that impatient man was not Hyuga Neji, but a blurry imitation of him.

Shikamaru sped up his shower, washing his hair and rinsing it in the process. He couldn't understand why exactly the idea of Neji not letting _that_happen again was so annoying...

Not that he really thought that it would happen again, no please, he didn't even imagine-

_Bullshit!_

Ok, he _did_imagine that when they just stepped into the bathroom together. For God's sake he was a man, and men have that kind of thought, mainly after they came in each others hands and - SHITSHITSHIT - slept together, with tangled legs and bare bodies...

_Shit...it's troublesome..._

He soaped his body, looking at the man with long threads over his bare back. Neji was watching the mirror, not looking at anything in special, just trying to calm his mind down.

_FUCK!_

He wanted so much to rush into Shikamaru's shower and jump him under that hot water...it was so painful...he would never allow himself to drink again during this fucking bond, it was too dangerous, way too easy to forget the boundaries and run out of control.

Neji fingered his hair, trying to undo the knots and to not think about the stupid bulge that began to grow in his trousers... that was not good at all.

_Think about your uncle, the elders, and the children playing at the garden...he is going to feel it. Shit! Shit! Shit! SHIT!_

Neji looked down, at the hut his fucking dick was building...he closed his eyes and prepared himself to feel ashamed for his entire life. Gods, he was hard thinking about Shikamaru. He was hard remembering those fantastic sensations of the night before. The kisses they shared and the moans...

_Oh, the moans..._

God, he couldn't stop the rapids of images and feelings, his member swelling fast, the sound of the shower making him feel ashamed...he needed to do something, but he was not going to run out of the bathroom, Shikamaru already knew about the bound, so he couldn't escape anymore...

"Neji..."

The Hyuga's body shifted and he lifted his head, looking at the blurry mirror.

"It's not me this time..." the voice sounded muffled by the water, but he could hear the amusement in his words.

_Smartass..._

He didn't turn to see Shikamaru, he wouldn't dare so much. At the same time, the Nara was watching Neji supporting his body with hands grabbing like claws in the marble sink. Was he in that much of pain? Was he working that hard to suppress his arousal? Well, Shikamaru knew well how was that, his own dick was in pain and need and he wanted to touch himself and make the arousal disappear in a jet of hot cum over the shower wall...but he couldn't, that would be even worse for them.

He smiled. Well, it wasn't just him that was lying blatantly about his real needs. He turned off the shower and opened the glass door. His hair was dripping wet and his body was hot as hell - maybe he was witnessing what hell could be.

Neji turned around and his white pearly eyes were overwhelmed by a dark and lustful desire, his long dark-cocoa locks fell perfectly over his bare chest, parted wet lips and an almost painful expression in his face that made Shikamaru skip a heartbeat and his lungs choked at the view. God, it was the very devil in a man's body...

"Neji..." his own voice sounded dangerous and the way the older shinobi licked his lips and pressed his teeth around the bottom lip made him swallow.

_Gods in a ship!_

Shikamaru didn't gave a shit about his nudity and walked until he was toe to toe with the Hyuga - who was breathing uneven, hands grabbing strongly on the sink, as he was making his best effort to not jump on the Nara.

"Hey..." Shikamaru spoke, his hands running across those beautiful locks of Neji's hair, pulling it back and watching the full-moon eyes close with the light touch. Shikamaru drew circular forms on that porcelain silky skin with his thumbs, noticing the blush in his cheeks, cupping Neji's face in his hands till he could breathe properly "You don't need to be ashamed...it's natural you know, we're men after all. We should use our geniality to understand our hormones."

Neji opened his eyes. He couldn't form sentences; he couldn't even understand why he was so ashamed! Maybe because he wasn't in control, or because he was the one who started the arousal this time, or just because he was enjoying Shikamaru's worry. He new it was normal, he was the one who woke up with his dick pressed against tanned buttocks, he was the one who grabbed Nara's body before sleeping...

_Gods, I'm so fucked!_

Neji looked at Shikamaru's eyes, feeling his thumbs on his face, caressing it gently, concernedly. The Hyuga could feel Nara's cock head touching lightly his own clothed member, and it was sexy even if it was not the intention. It was fucking unworkable!

"Nara..." he muttered, closing his eyes again and licking his own bottom lip. Gosh, he was going to die! His hands lifted and he touched Shikamaru's waist, moving him away, making the man sighs "Why us?" he asked, opening his eyes again and looking for some answer on midnight orbs "You're the strategist, the genius, the IQ freak; just explain it to me..._why_?"

Shikamaru tried not to lose his mind, the friction was over, but that handsome face, that angst voice asking him for answers he didn't have, even if he was working hard to believe it was a normal hormonal processes.

"I don't know, Hyuga..." he muttered, feeling his own wet thumbs play with the pale skin, his eyes scrutinizing the strong contours of that face, the sweet outlines of that stunning white shaded eyes...

He had never seen anything like this before, not even in his mother's kitchen, he

didn't pay that much attention to the man's features before...Gods, he was even sexier with that pain in his irises, his thin eyebrows curved in disgust and aroused at the same time.

_Neji..._

He stepped forward, making their bodies touch again. He couldn't suppress it anymore and he knew Neji was feeling the same, they were bonded after all, so why bother trying to suppress it? They were geniuses, they could work out the meanings after!

"Gods, you're fucking beautiful" he stated before making their lips touch lightly, feeling Neji's arms embrace his waist and pull him closer.

It was as if the night before had broken their boundaries, and now they didn't know the new limits. Their tongues reached for each other and tangled in lust, dancing without choreography and playing with lava-like hot saliva, their hearts raced, their hips rocked and they swallowed moans down their throats.

The fucking sexual tension burning their neurons, numbing their senses and making their bodies melt in a warm feeling of abandon. Shikamaru could spend all his life just tasting the sweet tongue of Neji, the hot fainting senses burning him slowly.

_Oh, please, give me the firestorm... _

Neji was dying inside, his brain was disconnected and he could just feel Shikamaru's fingers over his face, touching him lightly, holding him tight, giving them the closure their bodies oh so needed. He was aware of the feelings, he was not wasted or drunk, he completely knew the facts this time, and if it was not the bound he was afraid of what could it be.

"Shikamaru" he started, nibbling the chunin bottom lip "We need to endure it...I'll take a shower now..." Shikamaru's hands embraced Neji's frame, travelling across his spine, strong fingers marking territory, burning fast in the porcelain pale skin "We will deal with that later..."

The Hyuga let himself lean into Nara's embrace a little bit more, stroking the wet locks with his long fingers.

"Yeah...you're right... nd Choji is waiting for me..." Shikamaru reluctantly stepped back and reached for a towel, without looking back he dried his own body and made his way out of the bathroom.

_Gods! Fate, you're fucking killing me this time!_

-x-

They were sitting in the kotatsu, drinking a really tasty coffee and eating some biscuits that Choji brought with him. Neji offered to sit far away from them so they could speak in privacy but both men said it was ok, and then Choji started talking about the last night.

"Ino was completely wasted after you left, I wanted to take her home - to my place, or Inoichi-san would be really upset with her drunkenness - but then something weird happened."

He was concerned, Shikamaru could sense that and see that in his friend's eyes, so he just waited for more information, sipping his coffee and listening patiently.

"Ino saw Genma-san and tried to run away from him, but he saw her as well and walked in her direction. I had no clue about what was that, they looked like cat and mouse. So she started feeling bad and walked to the girls' toilet, I stayed at the door, asking her if she was ok, and obviously I didn't go in..."

He rolled his sweet eyes, as he was now feeling the stupidity of not breaking the girls' bathroom rule.

"So Hinata helped me and went in to see if Ino was ok...sorry about that Hyuga-san," he said looking deep into Neji's eyes "Ino shoved Hinata out, shouting and punching without coordination and Hinata-chan was concerned. We knew Ino was not ok, and Sakura told me that it was something about the last mission before passing out and being dragged home by Sasuke and Naruto..."

"What happened after that, Choji? Don't beat around the bush" Shikamaru said bored, he didn't like all that bullshit, he wanted his friend to skip the recital and go straight to the point.

"It was when Genma-san approached and asked me what was happening in there, why all of us were creating a fuss...I explained that Ino was completely drunk and that she didn't let anyone help her. And after that he said nothing and just went inside. I listened her yelling at him, but that was normal, the unusual thing was that he scolded her until she was crying, he washed her face after she puked and helped her to walk out"

"I see that he helped her, but what is there to be so worried about Choji?"

"I'm almost there, Shikamaru" he said, moving his fingers nervously "They went out and he told me he was going to walk her home, I said it was better to walk her to my place, because of her father, and he said: '_No, Yamanaka-san is going to sleep in my place, I need to talk to her tomorrow morning_' and of course I said it was not ok, because they were not friends and stuff...I was feeling uneasy, I couldn't let him just take Ino to his house, I don't even know him!"

Shikamaru sighed; he shouldn't have left so early last night. He massaged his temples, closing his eyes and thinking in the amount of ideas that could explain Genma's behavior...

"But then, Shikamaru, he told me it was about the mission and that no one, not even he could help her!" Choji said.

Neji stared at the younger man. So Shiranui-san, Yamanaka-san and Tokuma were at this mission...

"And Ino said to me that she would be ok, that she could kill him if he tried some weird stuff...Shikamaru...I let her go with him." the guilt in his eyes was burning the man inside out.

Neji felt a bell ringing inside his head, his senses becoming alert and he hissed.

"We should go to Shiranui-san's" he said, closing his eyes.

"Yeah..." Shikamaru positioned his hands in his strategist jutsu form and sighed "But before we do, I need to talk Neji" he said closing his eyes "Choji, please, go first and make sure she's ok. We will join you in a few minutes" his best friend nodded and waived good-bye.

Shikamaru felt weary.

"I'm aware that Genma, Ino and Udon were at the team mission, and I know that Tokuma was their reinforcement ninja" he opened his eyes and stared at a blank Neji "I sort the teams, it's part of my job" he explained "So, you should start talking, everything your cousin told you the other day..."

"You...knew?" the Hyuga asked a little bit confused.

"I was trying to let it be. Tokuma's cracked chakra, Ino's weird behavior...I thought she was going to tell me, but it's already too much. I need to know exactly what kind of situation I'm facing..."

Neji went silent and nodded.

"He was blaming himself about not saving Yamanaka-san. And she told me yesterday that it was her own fault."

"You spoke with her yesterday?" Shikamaru raised a brow.

"While you were having fun with Uchiha..."

Shikamaru rolled his eyes. That was a pain, he just wanted to solve everything and watch some clouds while he could, but this was much more than he had expected...

"What else did she tell you?"

Neji raised his head and held the deadlock.

"You will need to ask her, I'm not telling her confidences to you"

"C'mon Hyuga, this is not a game"

"She didn't want you to know, she was afraid of you discovering" He said firmly "So ask her, the only thing I can tell you is that she is immersed in shadows and that only she can help herself"

"Neji..." the Nara warned him "I'm not playing, she is important to me so you better cooperate. What if it was Hinata?"

"I'm not telling you" he said again, standing up "You will not understand anyway."

"What the fuck Neji?" Shikamaru stood up and stepped closer "Who are you to say that I would not understand her?"

"I'm quoting her own words. She shattered herself to become a better kunoichi, for me that's enough, for you it's not"

"What the hell did she do?" he grabbed Neji's robes.

Shikamaru couldn't understand why Neji was not helping him. He was feeling stupid. Why would Ino talk to Neji and not to him?

"Please...Neji, please" he muttered, dropping the pressure in his fists.

"Shikamaru..." he murmured, watching those midnight eyes begging him for answers. Ino was his best friend; he was scared, he was afraid of losing her, of seeing her fall into darkness "She overcame her limits...and it cost her pride, she needs help, Shikamaru...but first of all, she needs some space."

The Nara nodded, looking at the ground. Shit, why were his feelings beneath the surface like this? Was him that stressed? Why was he acting so over the top?

"Sorry" he muttered.

"It's ok, Shikamaru. We are going to find a way to reach her. You will see..."

He nodded at those words.

"Thanks Neji..."

"She spoke with me because I confronted her, and I opened myself for her...I shattered myself once and I put the pieces back together. I'll help in every way I can. I promise you..."

"Why?"

"Because Sasuke was right. Sex, pleasure...feelings. Our feelings are bound, I can feel your pain and concern...I feel _you_" The Nara looked up, their eyes met softly, a warm sensation surrounding their chests "I feel you, Shikamaru" Neji said, touching the other man's chin, caressing his tan skin "You're under my skin..."

Shikamaru was speechless. He wasn't expecting those words. He wasn't sure if the warm feeling inside his body was relief or happiness. But he felt as he wasn't alone anymore.

He hadn't felt like this since Asuma's death.

He had closed himself, warned his heart that everybody someday would leave him alone, would die. He understood that they were ninjas and they were fated to die. So he caged his feelings; he cared about his friends and tried to stay away from all pain it could bring him. Shikamaru started being more and more rational, strategic, and maybe cold, for his own sake…but now, Neji's words were reaching him, he could feel him under his own skin, under his pain and scars and, in some way, Neji was deeper than all his fears.

He felt that if Neji was by his side, everything was going to be fine. And he believed it. He wanted to believe and hold fast onto that security.

Shikamaru leaned his face in, touching the older man's lips with his own in a slow kiss. It was just a small pressure of lips, soft and caressing. He stepped back and tried to pull himself together. He knew it was too much information under the Hyuga's words, but he was going to deal with this later. They had someone to save now. And if they were together, everything was going to be ok.

"We should go..." he muttered.

"Yes"

-x-

Choji was sitting in the small sofa looking concerned at Genma – who was sitting in the other armchair, Neji was leaning on the wall and Shikamaru was smoking a cigarette close to the window. Ino was still asleep and they said nothing, till the older man sighed heavily and start talking.

"I cannot say what happened. It's not because of the protocol, it's because of Ino, she is the only one that can say anything if she feels like doing so" his words were firm "I would like to talk to her before you do, so please give us some time. Part of what happened lies on my hands, and I will feel better if I can try to solve the damage caused..."

"Genma-san, understand us, we're worried" Choji said, looking into the man's eyes "She is part of us, she's not just our teammate, Ino is family for me and Shikamaru. I don't know what happened but I'm not sure I trust y-"

"Choji, let's go" Shikamaru said, throwing his cigarette out "If what she told Neji is right, part of what happened is her fault too"

"She accepted my idea" Genma said "I'm responsible of giving her the idea, and she is responsible of accepting it and doing what she has done..."

"You sure?" the Akimichi asked Shikamaru and he was going to nod. The sound of something falling onto the floor made them aware of Ino's awakening.

Genma stood up and stormed through the hallway to his own room. The man was concerned for the young kunoichi and he saw her sat on the floor beside his bed.

"Ino, you're ok?"

She looked up at him and felt lost. Why was she in an unknown house with Genma?

"It's your place?" she asked, rubbing her eyes and seeing him nod "I think I broke your alarm clock, it was on my way..."

"It's ok" he sat beside her "How are you feeling?"

"Hung-over" she said "I'm going home...thanks for yesterday" she stood up but he grabbed her wrist.

"We should talk"

"I don't want to..."

"We need to" he insisted.

"I'm fine. I already told you that, Genma" she looked in pain.

"Please Ino, let me help you. I don't understand why you're so messed up because of what happened, but it was my fault an-"

"Of course you don't understand!" she accused him and freed her hand "And it's not your fault! I'm a grown up woman, don't treat me as if I was a little girl" tears formed in her eyes "I don't need your pity; I don't need you to look at me like I was stupid. It was hard but I did it: mission accomplished, that's all that matters!" she screamed.

"Don't be spoilt, that's not all and you sure know it" he muttered "Ino, I need you to explain me why you drank so much yesterday, why were you sobbing while slept, why the hell are you this shattered?"

"You don't know, do you?" she laughed dryly "It's because you're like everyone else; you can't see an inch ahead of your own nose. Go fuck yourself; I don't need anyone's help!"

He snorted.

"Your friends are in the living room. They are concerned...don't look at me like that, it's not my business to intrude in your decisions, I said nothing to them"

"Good" she murmured and walked away.

"I've being through something similar Ino. I will be waiting for you to come back" he said, without looking at her "It can seem out of place for me to really understand you, but I would like to try..."

She felt the tears stain in her cheeks, listening to him...maybe it would be better to talk to Genma. Ino stopped at the door frame, without looking back; she knew she wouldn't be strong enough to look at his eyes if she wanted to say it.

"It was the first time I did something like this, Genma...that's all" and then she went out. Genma felt the bittersweet flavor of the first time you kill someone like that, and he looked at the empty space she filled seconds before.

_Ino, I'm sorry..._

The blond girl reached the living room, tears streaming down her face. God, she needed help, she just wanted to feel safe, to forget the blood on her hands and the awful feeling that was killing her inside out. She saw Choji and Shikamaru.

"Take me to somewhere safe..." she babbled, feeling her knees falter, but before she could fall strong hands held her in place. Choji's scent made her feel at home and the strong voice that sounded after that made her smile.

"Let's bring her to my place" Neji said.

He was there, standing by her. He told he would be there for her and he was.

_Thank you, boys...thank you._

-x-

He placed a blanket over her body and went out watching his bond-mate leaning on the wall of the hallway. It had been a hard morning, but after bringing Ino to Neji's house and feeding her, letting her cry her heart out onto his chest, she finally fall asleep.

"She's sleeping" Shikamaru muttered, feeling tired.

The older shinobi just nodded and lead them to his own room. They sat side by side on the futon, without say a word and Shikamaru sighed. He had never seen Ino like that, not even after Asuma's death. A huge concern took place in his heart.

"Give her some time, she will be ok" Neji said, reaching his haiku's book over the night table.

"Can we go outside? I need a cigarette..."

They went to the back porch and sat there looking at the little garden. The slightly cold wind was nice to calm their minds a little.

Neji fell quiet; he knew how the other was feeling because all those worries were inside his chest too. And he looked at the Nara, asking himself what exactly he should do…

Shikamaru watched the clouds and lit a fag. The smoke filled his lungs and he breathed heavily. Choji went home some minutes ago, after lulling Ino till she was feeling better...they were such a wonderful team, taking care of each other even when they had no clue about what happened...

His mind travelled through the whole day. Before lunch, when Ino thanked the three men and smiled sadly; when Neji said he could feel Shikamaru's feelings; when they kissed in the bathroom...Shikamaru relived the night before, the raw pleasure, the boundaries they surpassed, the warming feeling of laying in Neji's embrace before falling asleep...

He didn't know exactly if he was ok with the idea of them being under each others skin. At the beginning the bound sounded stupid simple for him, but now after Sasuke's childish behavior and his storytelling, Shikamaru was a little bit confused. That morning, when Neji told him he could feel his feelings his heartbeat increased, his heart felt warm, and even if it was too troublesome, that sounded nice and pleasant to hear.

It was like being supported and understood. Neji looked peaceful; as if he was ok now that Ino was in his place and they were taking good care of her. That morning, in Genma's house, he felt the Hyuga's jitters, the strong anxiety they were sharing inside their chests. And even if it was quite weird to feel and be felt by him, it made Shikamaru sense as he was not alone.

The Nara was not feeling what he was supposed to feel after last night. He was not horny as this morning in the shower, he was not angry with Neji about not telling him the truth under the chakra bond, he was not anxious around the older man...Shikamaru was peaceful, as a sweet round cloud in summer. As if he was really using his genius brain to understand that there was a bond and there were consequences of the bond, and it was ok if he didn't understand why they were stuck together...because he didn't completely understand that yet, after all he did the same procedure as every fight he had in his life, and Neji just tried to understand his chakra flux...and then they fused, they merged their energies without even trying...

He looked over at the jounin, his long cocoa threads falling over his shoulders as he peacefully read. His pale lilac eyes moving fast across the pages. The imperial air Neji held with his mix of quiet beauty and strong sharp lines enough for anyone to take a second look. Much like a nobleman in his strength and power but still sensitive.

Shikamaru's mind travelled around all he knew about the Hyuga, and that wasn't much. He wanted to know him better, to know every single piece of his puzzled life. With whom he has slept? Has he ever been in love? What was his favorite season and why? What exactly was his relationship with the main house of his clan?

There were a ton of gaps he couldn't fill in. Loads of story and life he didn't know. An incredible amount of important moments or small details he had no clue at all...

Maybe he should try to understand the man that was living under his skin. The young man that was sharing his feelings and home with him. They didn't have much time, though...

"What are you reading?" he asked interested, smoke flying onto the cold breeze.

"Basho" the Hyuga said, looking up at him. Neji's eyes were like small clouds, warm clouds...would he be there for Shikamaru forever or it would end as soon as they were not bound anymore?

"Read to me" he asked.

Neji smiled and turned the page.

"_Now in sad autumn_  
><em>as I take my<em>  
><em>darkening path . . .<em>  
><em>A solitary bird.<em>"

Shikamaru smiled sadly, this one was just like Neji, a lonely caged bird into that gray autumn...

"_Glorious the moon . . ._  
><em>therefore our thanks<em>  
><em>dark clouds<em>  
><em>Come to rest our necks.<em>"

The Nara looked at Neji as he kept reading, this haiku was Shikamaru's. He felt like he could spend all his life listening to that deep voice, reciting ancient poems till he fell asleep. But he didn't sleep, he just stayed there watching the Hyuga reciting his favorite parts of haiku and looking at him sometimes. Exchanging knowing and warm looks, as if they were hugging each other with the sweet words the old poet wrote.

While listening to the tale-like little poems he felt something hold his heart. He didn't know if it was him or Neji, but the haiku and the clouds, the peace of being there with his bond-mate, knowing Ino was sleeping and that they were going to be ok; all that made him think that the failed jutsu and the chakra bond weren't that bad; in fact he almost appreciated it...

Neji looked at him; the cozy look causing Shikamaru to understand that in that moment the feeling was mutual. Maybe the Hyuga was even lonelier than himself, maybe their friendship was going to change their lives, and the warming feeling of being under the other's skin was going to last for all their lives. Maybe they could lounge into each other and keep going even when everything was troublesome, full of pain and difficult missions.

"What is that, Neji?" he asked without really wanting an answer, because maybe the answer was going to scare them.

"I don't know" the older muttered, smiling calmly. They were fine even if they didn't know the real meaning "But I quite like it..."

"What do you like?" Shikamaru asked, looking at the light gray clouds beyond the tree.

"Feeling you under my skin" he answered low, as if it was a secret, as if it was too much to handle...

"Yeah, I think I like it too" he replied, looking back at the older man "Thanks for today, Neji"

The Hyuga put down his book and leaned against the column besides Shikamaru, closing his eyes, feeling the Nara's shoulder against his, feeling their hands touch lightly over the floor, feeling the chunin tangle their pinky fingers together in a shy movement but holding it tight.

"You can count on me..." Neji confided, leaning his head atop of Shikamaru's, feeling homelike, peaceful, warm...happy.

And suddenly it looked anything but troublesome. They stopped fighting themselves and fell asleep. They just didn't know they were increasing their bond to an up-graded level. Because feelings were going to lead them to the troublesome last thing...

_Love. _

**TBC**

**N/A:** so… do I deserve a review? Please let me know what do you think about this chapter! And, for sure, what do you think is coming next?

Loads of love. Tai xxxx


	8. Killing me Softly

**A/N: **Dears, I'm so glad that many of you reviewed last chapie! I know i'm taking too long to publish the chapters, but I'm trying hard not to stop writing this fanfiction. I'm really happy you liked the chapter and how things are developing.

**Beta: Kuroda Miharu** is doing a GREAT job beta-ing this fic for me, so thanks love!

**WARNING: LEMON CHAPTER hehehe**

* * *

><p><strong>When Shadows Surround You<strong>

_-x-_

_Chapter 8 _

**Killing Me Softly**

* * *

><p>He was sitting at the door frame of his room, a cup of tea in hand, watching his bond mate sleep soundly on his bed. Shikamaru was tired; he had a lot of new discoveries to work with. After they had finished dinner and lulled Ino to sleep he had checked in with the Yamanaka's and Choji to reassure them that Ino was alright Shikamaru had crashed on the bed and succumbed to sleep.<p>

Neji was looking at the deer ninja, the way the moonlight touched his clothed body and made him look even more beautiful. It was half past two and the jounin still couldn't sleep. That afternoon he woke up in the porch, cold freezing his body and a shivering Shikamaru clinging to his chest. He looked at the guy and thought about his new feelings...

In fact the Hyuga felt uneasy. Being under each other's skin was hard to handle. He had no clue how to behave... It looked like the bond was releasing its range, but it was getting stronger in the real meaning of the fusion...they were, indeed, intrinsically attached. He had crawled away from Shikamaru and waited before waking him - the autumn's chilly cold would get him sick.

Now he could feel the small warm peace in Shikamaru's chest while he was sleeping. His own shadowy confusion of his own feelings creeping in and he didn't want it to disturb the other's sleep. So Neji closed his eyes and tried to reduce his annoyance.

The warm blanket covering his legs was nice, the Hammam tea was great and the thin light of the moon was comforting...Maybe they should stop releasing the jutsu...Who knows if it was what drove them into the other stage of the bound. Drove them into feelings...

A slight noise made him open his eyes. The door beside their room slid softly and Ino came out. She blinked twice before recognizing him sitting under the door frame and smiled sadly as she sat by his side.

"Hey..." she muttered, grabbing her own blanket over her shoulders "Can't sleep?" Ino asked low.

He just nodded. He felt rested because of their afternoon-nap, Neji wasn't a sleepyhead at all...His white eyes focused on her sleepy face. Ino looked tired even with all the sleep she had.

"I didn't know I could sleep that much...How long have I been sleeping?"

"Since half past seven, after dinner"

"Wow...And I feel like I could keep sleeping..."

"That's my fault" he muttered and sighed "You were crying and sobbing during your rest, so I pressed some chakra spots just a little, then you could rest completely"

She nodded, looking at the teapot and the empty cup beside it.

"Thank you"

"You're welcome, Yamanaka-san"

"Ino. You can call me Ino. I will call you Neji from now." she smiled to him and grabbed the empty cup, pouring some tea in it.

"Fine" he looked at her pale face, the small black rings under her eyes making him notice that she was still worried "How's that going?"

"Need to endure it..." she murmured, sipping her tea "I will pull all together again, I know I can do that..."

Neji watched Shikamaru turn over the mattress and hide his face on the pillow.

"How's going the bond? Sakura told me..."

"Quoting Shikamaru: _troublesome_"

She smiled and looked at him curiously "Have you tried to release it?" she bit her lip to contain a smirk.

"Hm"

"And?" curiosity lit her face.

"Four more steps..."

"Just four?" she asked confused and he nodded "When you did it?"

"Yesterday, after the party" Neji bit his inner cheek trying to not feel embarrassed.

"Were you drunk?" Ino glanced at the sleeping Shikamaru and smiled weakly. She was thankful of him taking good care of her...

Neji nodded and she smiled even more, looking back to her cup.

"If you do it properly, must be at least five steps" she muttered "How strong is the bond?"

"We...are aware of each other's feelings..." he said uncomfortably.

"Quite a deep one then..." she yawned and looked up at him "Must be tiring"

"Hn...We're getting better..."

"I should go home"

"Don't worry Ino, Choji already informed your father you're here"

"Not because of my parents..." she looked sad "Just...maybe to feel I'm at home, in my room, that can help the pain go away..."

Neji felt concern bashing his chest. After all Ino was a young woman, and women are used to feeling much more than men most of the time. She needed someone to lean on, maybe he should offer his back up...

"Want to talk?"

Her eyes narrowed and she shifted slightly.

"Not yet..."

"It can help"

"I know..."

"You think being home with your family will help you?"

"No"

"Why?" he was pushing her, but it felt like the right decision.

"My mother doesn't give a shit about my missions...Dad is always working or drinking with his mates..."

"I'm sure she would be glad to comfort you, Ino, she's your mother"

He watched her face become even more upset and couldn't understand why. Most mothers would be glad to help even if they don't know the reasons for the sadness, Yamanaka-san must not be different from that.

"She doesn't seem to be sometimes..."

"What was that?"

"She's not a normal mother, Neji" she looked at him with her sad eyes "Not like Yoshino... She doesn't accept me like I am..."

"I can't understand because I never had a mother" he said, feeling weird opening up to her. In some way it was painful, but maybe like this he could reach her.

"She doesn't like me being a kunoichi. She used to say that women shouldn't be ninja..." Ino sipped her tea, looking at the wall "She wanted me to quit, but dad said I should do whatever I wanted, so I kept on my shinobi duties...And she stopped looking at me as she used to...As if I...had done something bad..."

Neji leaned on the wall, feeling some weird pain over his chest, like being abandoned. But Ino's mother had kind of abandoned her. It was mean.

"Maybe she's just afraid of you getting hurt..."

"No..." she looked down again, placing one blond lock behind her ear "She wanted me to get married to a wealthy boy, to live a beautiful life and have a lot of children."

"What mother doesn't want it for their child? She wanted you to have a safe life with a loving husband and a happy family..." he tried to cheer her up.

"No Neji, she looks at me as though I could do better than what I am. She doesn't care about my feelings..."

He could understand that, the creepy look he received since his father's death, as everybody expected great things from him, but he couldn't achieve their wishes...It was like living a nightmare.

"I understand the feeling. Everybody from the clan expected me to be better than my father, and when I reached their expectations they thought I was defying them...So I felt like I was never going to surpass what they had planed for me..."

She chuckled sadly and looked at her cup.

"I tried my best to be a good kunoichi. Dad's proud of me, but she's not...She keeps buying me girly clothes and saying that I will find a nice boy and quit missions...She doesn't understand what being a good ninja means to me..."

"What does it mean to you?"

She smiled at him but her eyes were covered in sorrow and pain. There was the shatter again, the crack-like feeling.

"Surpassing my own limits. Becoming stronger than I know I can be. Feeling like I can do whatever is needed during the missions..."

_Low self-esteem._

"And how is it going?"

"Breaking me into pieces...Maybe my mother is right, I should get married and live happily ever after...Maybe the pain would stop and she finally would be proud of me..."

They were silent. Neji's chest was hurting, he felt like he was not the only one suffering in their village. Ino had her problems too, her own pain and her own way through it...

"You should just try to put everything back together, then you can think clearly about that. Now is not the right moment"

She nodded and stood up, leaving her empty cup on the floor.

"I'm going home. I'll let you know if I need help...but now I'm calmer than before. Thank you, Neji" she said, seeing him nod with a concerned expression shading his face "And if I were you I would try to release the bond faster, to not get into any... worse trouble..."

Ino tied her hair in a ponytail, leaving her blanket on the floor and walked away, disappearing into the living room and leaving with the light thud of the main door closing after her.

Neji sighed, maybe they should just release that bond for good. At the very least they needed to try it again.

-x-

The jounin crawled on the futon, feeling it dip with his weight. He didn't want to disturb Shikamaru so he just stayed there, kneeling beside him and watching him sleep. His heartbeat increased listening to the peaceful pace of the other man's breathing, he looked comfortable laying there, tangled with the blanket and sheets.

Neji lifted his hand and touched Shikamaru's side, sliding his fingers over the man's skin. What were those feelings? It had all begun that morning with the discovery of their 'feeling's bond', then Shikamaru had opened up to him a little bit more and leaned on him as if the younger man needed it badly, especially when he was worried for Ino.

The Hyuga removed a thick black lock from the other's face watching him move slowly and open his eyes lazily, blinking sleepily.

"What...happened?" his voice was rough "Is Ino ok?"

"She went home...she said that needed her own room."

"Women...So troublesome..." he stretched his body noticing that the older man was looking at him strangely "Are _you_ok?"

"Hn"

"'_Hn_' what?"

"Just..." he shook his head, looking away "Ino told me we should release the bond as soon as possible..."

"And?" Shikamaru could sense that weird thing in his own chest "Are you worried?"

Neji looked down again, locking their eyes. He couldn't lie to Shikamaru, he would sense it.

"Kind of..."

"We can do it tomorrow morning...What time is it? Did you have some rest?"

"It's three o'clock and no, I didn't sleep" he was feeling different, he could speak normally with Shikamaru as if he had known him forever as they were close to each other...

The deer ninja closed his eyes and nodded almost falling asleep again.

_Lazy bones__!_

Neji smiled and lay on the bed beside his bond mate. When he stepped in the room he had an aim, he wanted to release the bond right now and stop it increasing to any other troublesome purpose it could have. But now he was feeling uneasy, he felt like he couldn't do that, he was afraid and scared, Neji was feeling weak and he hated it. Shikamaru sighed.

"What, Neji?"

"_What _what?"

"I can feel you, spare me and spill it already"

"Hn..." he turned on his side to look at Shikamaru finding him with closed eyes "What if we try to do it now?"

The man opened one single eye and narrowed at him.

"I could do it by myself if it doesn't bother you." Neji said firmly.

Shikamaru yawned and closed his eyes again. He could feel Neji was scared, he just didn't understand exactly why...So he thought about all the possibilities; Ino was a med-nin and she obviously knew a lot about chakra fusion, maybe she said something to him...But if Neji wasn't telling him it was because it was bothering the older man to a point that he didn't feel comfortable of talking about.

He sighed and sat up slowly, taking off his tee and heavily falling back again. Then he kicked the blankets sleepily, feeling the cold air wrap him and kept his eyes closed as he cocked his hips and took off his boxers, throwing it to the floor in a responsive move.

Neji shuddered unconsciously, watching Shikamaru strip himself lazily. Sharp bones and toned muscles blurring his view. The Hyuga tried to look away but when the Nara dropped his underwear he just glanced at his nude and exposed body. He held a sigh and licked his dry lips.

_It's going to be that tough..._

"Do as you please" Shikamaru told him lazily and it couldn't be more difficult to not pay attention at his words. The double meaning making the older tremble slightly.

Neji chuckled softly and took off his own clothes. He was trying his best not to look at the beautifully naked Shikamaru. What if Sasuke was right? What if they fell in love with each other? What if the bond never released?

He sighed and activated his Byakugan, kneeling beside the chunin and watching his chakra work fluidly. He centered his own chakra on his fingertips and touched the tanned chest at the same time he touched his own, starting to allow the energy pour through it. The sparkling feeling started, filling their chests as the other time. But this time it was smooth and quite, spreading warmness into their bodies.

He observed the chakra flux, its changes during the point press technique, watching it slowly being relieved from the pressure of their bond, the spot becoming less active. Shikamaru sighed relaxed and his breath started to become even quieter, it was a relaxing sensation. Neji smiled, he was doing it quiet fine and that's good.

He felt the moment to stop and did, resting his hands on his lap, admiring the peaceful feeling inside his chest, the slow wave of quietness filling his body nicely. So Neji moved away from Shikamaru and crawled in the bed, placing himself close to the younger's waist and thighs. His eyes felt to the other's man body, a slight shiver bursting out his frame without control, but the Hyuga made his way to keep his mind and body calm again.

Neji felt a little bit nervous when he touched Shikamaru's muscular thigh and pulled it, bringing himself to the middle of the other's legs. He squeezed his jaws, feeling the blush touch his cheeks and focused his eyes searching for the small spot on the Nara's perineum. He found it and moved.

Shikamaru trembled when a cold hand touched his inner thigh, moving it to the side and the touch dropped again, now the fingers lightly held his cock and sacks lifting it at the same time the other hand was placed in his perineum, two fingers rubbing it and stopping in place.

The Hyuga bit his lip and left Shikamaru's manhood placing his now free fingers in between his own tights, looking down to find his own chakra point. Neji started to release chakra from his fingertips and sighed.

He felt heatwaves take charge on his body and watched Shikamaru's body throb a little.

Neji was trying his best to fade his thoughts away. They weren't sexual thoughts as he expected them to be...No, they would be way easier to deal with, but his stupid mind kept repeating what Ino and Sasuke said.

_Please, just release...Please... _

Shikamaru's groan brought him back to work, feeling his body start to react to the touch and the chakra, exploding micro fireworks over his lower limbs. He felt his groin respond to it as well as Shikamaru's, but neither tried to do anything about it. They were aware this time, and even if they wanted badly to increase the touch, Neji was determined to finish the whole process before falling into his needs and desires.

-x-

One of the lazy man's arms lifted and was placed on his face, hiding his closed eyes in the crook of his elbow. Shikamaru was feeling weird, because even if he was getting hard he didn't want to stop Neji's effort. He didn't know exactly what was happening to the jounin, but he made sure to react as the other was leading them. And if Neji - who was placed between his legs, watching him, and touching their bodies - was confident and technical, he should at least make an effort.

-x-

Neji dropped his hands again and took a deep breath. He was hot and quiet at the same time, he was hard but he wanted to do this correctly. He was trying to suppress his fears doing his duty as a surgeon: with precision and accuracy.

The man licked his own lips and searched for the last spot, his eyes finding it easily. He nodded and held Shikamaru's cock with his long and slender fingers, feeling it bulge with the touch and throb in anticipation. He felt his own dick respond and he placed his fingertips right above the spot, doing the same thing in his own body and freed the chakra flux.

Shikamaru gasped unaware and Neji bit his bottom lip, letting go his gekkei kenkai. He tried his very best to stop his chakra and felt how turning on the sensation was. Like warm lava melting inside his body, lust sliding inside his pulsating member and he let his head fall backward slowly, looking at the ceiling and breathing uneasy, at the same irrational pace of Shikamaru's as they were completely connected.

He felt it start to stop slowly, bringing them to an outburst of sobs, gasps and shaking breaths as it was a dry orgasm. The bond was still there, he could feel Shikamaru all over his body, under his skin, their connection still alive and strong. The cold after the outcome wrapping his frame and making him shiver, but he was not sure if it was the weather or the fearsome feeling that was clinging inside his chest. It wasn't going to stop or release, they were going to be bound together forever...

His breath started to be more and more distressed, Neji couldn't hear or think properly, he was falling slowly to the very bottom, and he couldn't see any light at the end of that tunnel...

_Please, Fate, why us? Why like this? I don't know what else to do... _

"Neji" Shikamaru's voice sounded concerned and terribly far away.

_I can't believe I'm that weak... _

"Neji!" strong hands touched his bare shoulders and shook his body heavily "Hey! Are you listening to me?"

Shikamaru felt that lost, that terrifying feeling grasping his chest, and it wasn't his. When he opened his eyes, Neji was facing the ceiling, eyes closed, his body was shivering and his hands gripping his knees painfully.

"Take it easy...I'm here ok?" he said, kneeling in front of the Hyuga, pulling his shaking body to his chest and hugging him tight. Hands grabbing bones and muscles, hugging his friend and trying to warm him "Don't breakdown now, we're so close..."

"We're not!" he said painfully "I'm still feeling you..."

"That's ok, we can try it tomorrow again" Shikamaru said stroking Neji's hair "My father is coming back soon, everything will be back to what it was again, believe me..."

"But what if he can't?" he muttered angry, pressing his face in Shikamaru's shoulder, as if he wanted to hide from the world.

"We will find another way, just don't give up"

Neji didn't stop shivering, so Shikamaru did the only thing he could think. He covered the Hyuga with the blanket and lay them on the bed, placing Neji to rest his face on his chest, arms embracing each others bodies tightly.

"What if they are right?" Neji muttered, feeling the other's hand caress his back quietly "What if Sasuke was right?"

"Sasuke is a baddass, and he likes to frighten people, don't believe him too much"

"Ino said it could get worst too!"

"What can be worse, Neji? Use your genius brain, you know it's already too much"

"Maybe..."

Shikamaru felt cold in his chest, Neji was angry of being scared, so he moved away and took his face into his hands, cupping it and looking right into the bright white eyes.

"We're together in it, Neji. We will find something, we're genius for a reason"

"But what if it's true?" he asked, rolling his eyes at what he was going to say "What if it gets worse? What if Sasuke was not kidding and we...We're...going..."

"Neji, we're not going to fall in love with each other" he said decisive.

"How do you know that, Shikamaru?" he asked bustling.

"Because I don't believe in love" he muttered trying to calm the man down, making Neji's jaw fall a little to reply but the younger took advantage of his lower guard to brush their lips together.

Shikamaru's hand pulled Neji closer to him, their lips parting and tongues fighting slowly for more, sliding into their wet caverns and tasting each other flavors. The Hyuga moaned when he felt the younger man press their bodies together, bare skin touching harshly, making fire start to burn inside their veins.

So Neji let it be, forgetting everything that was driving him mad, wrapping his arms on the other's neck and sliding one leg between Shikamaru's, making him groan and nibble the Hyuga's bottom lip. Their breaths started to become uneven, their arousal growing fast and making them rock their bodies together, trying to reach for pleasure and oblivion.

Shikamaru was a genius; he knew why he started their body-confront, he wanted to make Neji forget about his worries, he wanted to dispel his own fear, he didn't want to think about falling in love because it was just unbearable, he was trying to find peace and kill their doubts in a slow burn. Because he was just as afraid and angry as the other.

In a fast move the Nara grasped Neji's cock with his strong hand and started to thrust it harshly, feeling numb with that hard member wrapped in his fingers, throbbing for more.

"Humm" the older gasped, breaking their kiss and gasping for air, while all his body was starting to boil with the feeling of being wildly touched. All his thoughts blurring inside his mind, his hands grasping into the other's hair and shoulder as it was his freedom, letting it burn deliciously inside his groin.

Shikamaru hid his face on the crook of Neji's neck, sucking his pale skin, licking that tasty skin and sliding his tongue viciously over his strong jaw, feeling the man shiver with the touch. He was so turned on that he couldn't bare it anymore. The Nara grabbed Neji's wrist and drove his hand to his own aching cock, feeling those pale and slender fingers response quickly to the silent demand, jerking Shikamaru off insanely. Each strong thrust making both of them gasp and moan, spreading pre-cum over their shafts and kissing brutally.

"Neji..." Shikamaru purred, biting his earlobe and putting himself atop of the other man, bringing their cocks to rock together and delightful sounds escaped their parted lips.

Neji couldn't breathe properly, his hands ran over the tan skin, memorizing the soft texture of it, squeezing muscular curves and suckling on Shikamaru's lips, sliding his fingers over round luscious buttocks, grasping it strongly and helping the man to rock their arousal together, making them groan and purr in erotic pleasure.

The kiss grew wilder, strong bites over bruised lips and soaked tongues. Neji cocked his hips in a harsh thrust against Shikamaru's leaking cock, making him growl sexily and suck on Neji's tongue as he wanted to devour it. They were feeling completely numb, rubbing their dicks madly, moaning into each others mouths, swallowing saliva and grabbing onto their bodies for dear life.

Shikamaru whimpered loudly, grasping his fingers on dark-cocoa treads, feeling its silky touch on his digits, increasing the thrusts of their hips, bringing them into a boiling and demoniac pleasure. Eyes looking into the others while kissing savagely, moonstone and midnight ones, sending strong waves of lust and desire.

The older one embraced Shikamaru's body; hiding his face on his neck, sucking it intensely, feeling the pulse under his wet tongue, rolling his hips while the other painted for air, softening his body into the raw sensation. Sweat, pre-cum and men smell over the room, turning them on in such a maddening way they couldn't bear it anymore.

"You're so fucking hot" the chunin purred, pulling the older's legs around his waist just to feel completely surrounded by him, their cocks thrusting into each other, their fluids leaking their glands, growing sensitivity making them swore.

"_Fuck,_ Shikamaru!" Neji almost screamed, pulling the man closer, kissing his face and licking his jaw, nibbling his earlobe "I need _more_" he demanded hoarsely into his ear, evoking strong shivers all over the Nara's body, their cocks throbbing in need.

It was obvious it wasn't enough, it was far from what they needed. Shikamaru moved fast, sitting and bringing Neji with him, rubbing his waist and shivering for dear life. Their lips started fighting again, sucking, biting, licking and kissing until the young one pressed Neji against the headboard harshly making him groan in pain and lust.

"You want more?" he asked, sucking the man's jugular viciously.

"Yes" he purred, sliding his hands on Shikamaru's slender waist, running his fingers all over his length and thrusting it painfully hard. "Don't you want more?" he asked suggestively, licking the man's lips, grasping the short black tresses and bringing the man to another kiss.

He felt Shikamaru's hand jerk his cock off, quick thrusts and the other hand gripping on his waist, while their tongues slid together in sync, playing with each other lips .

"I'll give you some more, Neji" he purred to the Hyuga's lips, breaking the kiss with a lustful suckle into the swollen bottom lip and running his tongue to his chin, biting it, going down through the column of his throat while Neji kept shivering with trepidation and the moist touch.

He lavished those milky clavicles, biting and nibbling all over Neji's chest, tasting him with closed eyes, salty sweat into his tongue, arousing Shikamaru even more than he thought could be possible. He bit one hard nipple teasingly, watching Neji lick his lips and moan, throwing his head back, resting on the wall.

He let his tongue travel, sucking his defined abs, biting his navel, letting marks all over his path, hearing Neji hiss in pain, pleasure and anticipation. Shikamaru's eyes looked at him devilishly, his tongue disappearing into scarce pubic hairs, slowly going down, making Neji tremble in arouse with the view.

The Nara's hand gripped around Neji's shaft, making it throb under his fingers, leaking instantly, and then he did it...

His moist tongue licked harshly the swollen head, tasting his salty fluids and moaning with the delicious sight of Neji's viciously squirming body.

"Unh!" the low and masculine growl made Shikamaru smirk and snatch the engorged and reddish gland into his mouth, suckling it hard "_GODS_!" Neji screamed, one hand grabbing into the sheets and the other grasping Shikamaru's loose hair ferociously.

Shikamaru stood a hand on Neji's waist, preventing him to thrust into his mouth and lowered his mouth onto that beautiful cock, taking as much as he could down his wet cavern, sucking and bobbing his head fast.

"Fuck, Shikamaru! _Fuck!_" Neji groaned helping the younger man speed up the thrusts of his mouth, feeling him devour his dick, licking it hard, sucking it into oblivion. He couldn't think, he almost forgot to breathe, cocking his hips without sense, being much stronger than Shikamaru's hand that was trying to keep him in place.

That amazingly hot mouth fucking his cock roughly, moaning onto it, spreading vibration over his shaft was driving him insane. Neji closed his eyes for a second just to open it again and watch Shikamaru's beautiful face hiding itself in his bristles, his gland thrusting insanely against his palate, evoking strong tremors over his body like an earthquake.

"Ah! Shikamaru!" he cried when he saw where the younger free hand was: touching Nara's neglect cock for dear life, making him groan while sucking Neji's dick "You're g-gonna kill me l-like this" he said without breath, feeling the vibrations of Shikamaru's hiss run all over his shaft.

He couldn't bear it for much longer, he was panting, his lower body trembling, heatwaves over his groin, moans and gasps breaking free from his parted lips. His fingers tightening on the other man's hair, feeling Shikamaru's hand push his hips down strongly while suckling him harshly.

"Shit, I'm...Unh-Close!" he warned "_Too_close!"

The Hyuga saw Shikamaru's hand work faster on his own cock, faint moans chocking around Neji's dick making him shiver, feeling his velvet sack contort in pleasure, boiling in the base of his frame, shaking his body. He was trying his best not to cum, but that was difficult.

_So fucking impossible!_

"S-Shikamaru! Hn-Stop!" he hissed, freeing the man's hair and grasping his own long locks crazily, warning the other he was almost there, he couldn't wait any longer. But the lazy ninja wasn't lazy at all, and he kept bobbing his head even faster "Gonna-"

"_AH!_" Shikamaru screamed, Neji's cock still wrapped inside his mouth, while the younger was coming hard on the sheets.

Neji trembled, watching the man come with his member inside his moist mouth sending thousands of insane sensations all over his body, he couldn't hold it anymore and Shikamaru didn't look like he gave a shit about the Hyuga cumming inside his mouth, so he grasped his hand again on those thick locks of the Nara and thrust roughly, feeling that wet and dangerous tongue lick the sensitive skin wrapped inside his mouth once more and everything exploded.

"AH! YES!" he groaned leaking his seed down Shikamaru's throat and watching it with reckless abandon.

_GODS!_

Feeling the younger man still suckling his cock and taking everything from him, Neji shook and stilled, his sight blurring with sparkling bright lights and his mind blanked. It was heaven, it was fucking insane! He couldn't believe it! He was going crazy with what just happened and with the orgasmic shivers that still ran through his body.

"You're crazy..." he murmured, feeling Shikamaru draw butterfly kisses on his stomach. He stroked the deer-nin's hair, feeling warm spread inside his chest, the kisses skimming his abs and climbing to his pectoral.

"Hn" Shikamaru smirked against his skin.

Neji sighed softly, enjoying being kissed like this. He mused it must be like lovers sharing a sweet moment…He shook his head, removing his thoughts away and looked at the man that now was lying on his chest, glancing at him and moving his lips slowly till they brushed Neji's.

It was a warm kiss, lips touching softly, tongues dancing on Neji's bottom lip and asking for entrance. The Hyuga smiled a little and parted his lips, closing his eyes at the same time his hands stroked Shikamaru's back and hair. The tepid tongue tasted just like him, bittersweet and almost salty, but he liked his taste in the other's mouth, it made Neji feel close to the younger man.

They broke the kiss and looked into each other eyes.

"It happens sometimes..." Shikamaru said, admiring those shining moonstones "When I indulge in the instincts" he smiled and rolled to the mattress.

"Good to know" he muttered low and laid back into his side of the bed.

"Did it surprise you that much?" the Nara asked smirking and rubbing his heavy eyelids.

"Hn" Neji scowled and looked away. He enjoyed it. In fact he enjoyed it a lot, but he was really surprised to see that lazy bum doing all the dirty job...

"Neji...are you troubled?" it was a trace of concern in his lazy voice.

"No"

"So what is this monosyllabic replies after a frigging blowjob?" he cocked a brown and watched Neji's scowl grow.

_He looks cute being snooty..._

"Are you being presumptuous about my out of character way of being hyperactive because of you?"

"Shut up!" he hissed and turned on his side, avoiding Shikamaru's eyes "I..."

"You?"

Shikamaru was having fun, seeing Neji acting like a baddass, all arrogant because of their make out...The Nara himself could say that he haddn't planned it, and maybe tomorrow after the heat and died down he would feel ashamed or regret, but it wouldn't last long for those thoughts would be abandoned soon after – troublesome.

"It was surprising" he said stoically and Shikamaru rolled his eyes, approaching their bodies.

"_You_what Neji?" he asked for whatever Neji was going to say before lost heart.

The long haired man felt the breath hit his bare shoulder and shivered. He didn't want to talk about what he felt during their make out, and Shikamaru seemed to be enjoying his proud moment. He took a deep breath and relaxed, pulling the blankets over their bodies and closing his eyes.

"I should say it felt like you were... trying to break me..." he said finally letting the words float around them and a gap that he didn't know how to fill.

Shikamaru's jaw fell and he blinked at the dark brown shag in front of his eyes. That indeed was a huge praise from the Hyuga genius.

After blinking once and again, Shikamaru smiled at Neji's back and thought that he was feeling almost honored, tough he didn't understand exactly why. It was just a make out session, wasn't it? So, what was the big deal on it?

"Glad you enjoyed it" he said, closing his eyes feeling some satisfaction spread inside his body. Then Neji kicked him without turning back and the Nara smirked.

_Troublesome Hyuga!_

-x-

The sun rose shyly in the sky and the birds sang their hearts out waking the lazy bum at 8 o'clock. Shikamaru opened his eyes and stared at the ceiling feeling the cold wrap his body. He turned his body and watched the sleeping Hyuga by his side. His breath was even and peaceful, his chest rising and falling, his hair spread all over the pillow.

Flashes of the other night popped inside his mind and he felt something weird. It was troublesome, and it was insane. First of all he was fucked - he knew it - because sometimes his instincts were not good to him; just like yesterday. He wasn't embarrassed or regretted it, but something inside his mind kept making him think that he shouldn't have done what he did.

Second, how in hell he lowered himself so much just for the pleasure of hearing the other's moans and pleas? He was a lazy man after all, he was the one to stay still and feel the slow burn run over his own body.

It has been a while since the last time he took some action into the game by his own...

He sat on the bed and looked at the pale man sleeping peacefully. Neji was beautiful, he was a strong man, with defined traces and gorgeous details. But now, Shikamaru was pondering about how last night would affect them, how they would look into each others eyes, how they would speak or act...

A warm wave shivered over his body; the sensation of that man squirming and groaning with pleasure because of him was something really nice to feel. But what if it was true? If they were fated to love? Even if he didn't quite believe in love he knew a lot of people fell in love, but that fate was not his.

_Troublesome, I'm thinking about fate..._

He felt heat in his face, not enough to blush though. A strong shiver hit his body and he rolled his eyes impatiently. _Time to stop thinking_. He sat up and put his boxers on, tying his hair in the typical high pony tail, stroking his hands over his face to completely wake up and yawned.

"Neji..." he muttered, trying not to scary the man "Hey, wake up..."

The long haired man blinked slowly, sleepily, eyelids starting to open and retinas focusing with the bright light of the day.

"Good morning, Sleepy Beauty" Shikamaru whispered watching the man stretch his whole body and finger his long hair lazily. That was a mirage.

"Hn" was his answer, turning to Shikamaru's side and burrowing his face on the pillow.

"And they say I'm the lazy bones" the Nara joked, pulling the blankets off of Neji, making the man shiver and snort.

"Pervert" he muttered, knowing that now his firm ass was exposed "Who knew..."

"Come on, I wanna see how many steps we can be apart" Shikamaru said bored, pushing the heat out of his body of seeing Neji's exposed frame.

Neji yawned and pushed his body up, sitting on the futon, his bare amazing body completely exposed now, hard pink nipples bristling because of the cold, goose flesh calling Shikamaru's attention. The deer-nin stood up and started to change his clothes, watching his bond mate do the same but slower. Then Neji took his tie and held his hair in a loose bun.

It was the very first time Shikamaru saw him like this. He looked like a samurai, his long tresses forming a big bun in his crown, bangs of hair falling into his face. The Hyuga finished getting ready and took the sheets out of the bed making a big ball in his hands.

"This, needs washing..." he muttered, sliding his feet inside the slippers "Ok, let's do it" he said calmly. Shikamaru was so catch up with Neji with this hair and tying his bed that he just nodded.

They walked together till the door and Neji stopped there, pointing with his chin to the hallway indicating Shikamaru to keep walking.

"Fine" the lazy ninja stated starting to walk "One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten..." he looked back and Neji nodded simply. Shikamaru snorted and kept walking "Eleven, twelve, thirteen, fourteen..." he breathed heavy and prepared himself for the pain "Fifteen...Sixteen" he was in the middle of the living room now "Seventeen...Ok, Eighteen!"

The pain bashed their bodies, making Shikamaru to step back and Neji to step forward.

"It's great" Neji said, his voice rough because of the pain that still trembling inside his body, walking till reach the other "I can practice with this distance, that's helpful"

"Yeah, it is..."

Then it was a strange silence. They were waiting for this moment, the awkwardness making them look away and heartbeats increasing. Last night they were having oral sex like bunnies and now they were celebrating the growth of range between their bodies. And at the same time, it was like a small dagger piercing inside their chests...If they achieve the release or break the chakra bond completely, what would happen to them?

The friendship. The partnership. The loneliness...

Neji stepped forward and took Shikamaru's chin with two fingers, forcing him to look into his white eyes. They were close, they were terribly close, noses almost rubbing and eyes confronting each other.

"What do you think about making me some mean coffee while I put this in the wash machine?" he asked low, and Neji's voice sounded sexy to Shikamaru's ears even if he was saying such stupid things "And after breakfast we can ask Hinata to train with us..."

"Hn" his heartbeat increased with the closeness, his eyes boring holes into Neji's pale irises.

Neji smirked a little, he was feeling exactly the same, but to see Shikamaru's reaction like this, as if he was slightly weak in comparison, made him feel strong and he wanted to say that they were going to be ok, just like Shikamaru did to him the last night. They were constantly switching roles, and that was warming, he wanted to hug that man and comfort him...

The Hyuga made their lips brush lightly, just to feel Shikamaru's lips again, as if it was enough to kill the fear they were feeling of being alone again. And it was. Shikamaru pressed their lips firmer in response and quickly walked away.

"Don't take too long, the coffee will be ready in five minutes!" he said, entering in the kitchen, counting steps.

Neji smiled sadly. No, he didn't want to lose Shikamaru, but he couldn't say that aloud; in fact the whole idea of being alone again without that lazy chunin was killing him softly in that moment.

_Shitty fate, I'm not sure if I want to break this bond anymore..._

* * *

><p><strong>AN:** God, I'm such a pervert writer... anyways, hope you enjoyed it. Do I deserve a review?

take care you all! loads of love! Tai xxx


	9. Wrong Feelings

**A/N:** Hey gorgeous, I loved all your reviews, it made me very inspired so I wrote this new chapter, it's smaller than usual, but it contains important info about Shikamaru's past... Hope you enjoy!

**Beta: Kuroda Miharu**

* * *

><p><strong>When Shadows Surround You<strong>

_-x-_

_Chapter 9  
><em>

**Wrong Feelings**

* * *

><p>Shikamaru was sitting on the wooden floor of the great porch of the Hyuga's main house. He was silently watching Neji and Hinata's train. It looked like they were dancing; their hands moving fast but at the same time gently. Fingers pointing at chakra points, hair spreading all over their shoulders and mixing itself with the wind; steady breaths and feet movements.<p>

Everything looked perfect to his eyes. Each move, every single step, even their voices whispering jutsus almost in sync. It was a sight to be seen. It was the magic of the Hyuga's Gentle Fist.

Shikamaru was so entertained with the training that he only felt Hiashi's presence when the man was already sitting by his side.

"How is it going?" the man asked with his stoic voice.

"Seventeen steps…"

"And?"

"We're still bound"

"What kind of bond now?"

Shikamaru turned fast to look at Hiashi's eyes.

_Shit, why does everybody ask?_

"We share each other feelings and emotions…" he muttered, turning back to watch the cousins.

The man sighed and nodded, but after that he said nothing. Shikamaru didn't know if he was grateful for the silence or bothered by it. So he fixed his eyes on the fight and disconnected from the world.

He could see how their moonstones eyes were linked, and their breaths in extreme sync and how they looked alike. How Hinata's moves were gentle and almost tender, and how Neji looked proud of his cousin, how he almost smiled when she fingered his chakra point, how he laughed when he escaped from a very hard finger punch, or how he touched her hair almost in delight while she smiled after a great performance deviating from his chakra attack.

Then they stopped. Breathless. Smiling happily. Sharing a weird confidence that made Shikamaru feel down his chest a weird kindness for the girl.

_Wait._

Was _he_feeling it or Neji?

_Troublesome…_

He watched how Neji smiled sincerely and muttered how she was getting better each day. Hinata blushed and nodded looking at the ground, but her cousin took her chin between his fingers and lifted her face.

"Be proud" he said, dropping his hand and looking at Shikamaru "I better go, thank you Hinata, great training!"

"Likewise!" she smiled "We should drink s-some tea, would you like that Shikamaru-kun?" she asked, walking to the porch.

"Sounds good to me"

"G-great, so see you then" she waved goodbye and entered, looking for her father, who left the porch in the middle of their training.

And then there was the silence, thick, weird, bothersome silence. Neji got close and looked at Shikamaru.

"Shall we go?"

"Hm"

Neji lead the way down the path and Shikamaru watched him, his long steps; the way his arms move while he walked…He saw the long thick cocoa threads falling over his back, wet with sweat, shimmering in the sun.

_Gods, why am I watching him like that?_

Shikamaru rubbed his hands over his face, trying to disconnect of such troublesome sensations, but all he saw was Neji stopping and facing him.

"Are you ok?"

"Yeah…"

"You sure?"

"It's just a headache"

But the Hyuga was much more intelligent than that. He held the deadlock for a minute or so, his white eyes clear and unreadable. Shikamaru could feel that huge chakra surrounding the jounin, a strong sensation of certainty, acuity and wisdom.

"Ok, take your time" he muttered and continued walking to the house.

Shikamaru did not understand what the hell that was but he knew that this man was the real Neji; the one without bond troubles, the one with a huge self-esteem, the one with no stress or anxieties. That aura was something everybody knew about the Hyuga Clan. They had this strong vibe, the ability to read people and reassure them with just a look.

Neji was trying his best. During the morning he had this weird sensation of not wanting to break the bond anymore. But he couldn't allow himself to think like that. He needed to control it, even if the emotions were driving him into that peaceful state. He wasn't feeling lonely anymore and that was so good, it felt so right so...perfect to be fulfilled that he was afraid of feeling empty again.

He couldn't let those feelings decide for him. Neji needed a long meditation session before starting to train, he needed to create a neutral sensation that could mask the other sensations. The Hyuga knew it wasn't fair to fight the right decision.

They needed to break the bond. No matter how.

X

"Hi, Yamanaka-san, is Ino at home?"

"Oh, Shikamaru-kun, yes she is, but she's been in her room since yesterday, she doesn't want to come down or even eat" the woman's voice sounded concerned, even with the bright smile she kept on her lips.

"She's been through a lot of things, Yamanaka-san" Neji said, looking kindly at her.

"Um…I'm glad you're concerned about her, I hope she will get better soon, please come on in" She opened the door widely and smiled "I'll prepare something for you, maybe like this she will eat something." she added fast, looking very happy with them being there. Neji didn't know if it was because they were good single men, or because maybe they could help Ino "Shikamaru-kun, you already know the house, she's at?in her room."

Then the woman went quickly to the kitchen. The whole house was very organized and feminine, everything looked tidy and perfectly at?in place, and loads of flowers were spread over the living room in different vases.

Ino was sat by the window, looking at the floor and dressed in the same clothes as the other day. She handn't bathed or showered since Kiba's birthday, her hair looked greasy and dirty. There were strong dark circles around her eyes and she seemed to have cried a lot.

She didn't talk, not even a word, so they came in and sat near a small table.

"So" Shikamaru muttered "What do you plan to do?"

The blond just rolled her eyes, tears starting to shine over her pupils.

"You're not going to get better like this…"

"Shut up."

He smiled, he got a reaction.

"You should clean yourself up, that would help you."

"I did when I arrived" she hissed "A thousand times. Nothing cleans me."

Neji crossed his arms over the chest and looked at Shikamaru, they were no help there.

"Fine, so we will leave you alone to fix everything by yourself" the Hyuuga said and looked at the chuunin as he was telling him they should leave.

"There are things I cannot fix anymore"

Shikamaru sighed impatient, but Neji was the one who said something.

"So leave it behind"

"I can't!" she screamed, a waterfall over her face, red eyes fixed on Neji's white ones.

"If you can't fix or have it back, you better learn how to give up on it"

"It's not that easy" she said painfully.

Neji deadpanned her, leaving her all by herself on that, no judgeing, no advice, no pity. So Shikamaru understood; the Hyuga was not waiting for her to fight, he was giving her the responsibilities she didn't want to assume.

"You told me it was your fault" Neji said blankly "In that moment it was necessary, it was your choice, you thought it was what you needed to do. Now face it, take it as yours, then let it be and start all over again."

She hiccupped and cried like a tiny baby but neither of them stood up and hugged her.

The door was opened and Yamanaka-san walked in, looking frightened by her own daughter.

"Troublesome…"

"Look at me, Ino" Neji said, feeling Yamanaka-san's hate all over the room "You need to take responsibility for your actions. Only you could do that during the mission and it's because of you that things worked out." She was crying and nodding at the same time "You said you wanted your mom to understand what was to be a good kunnoichi, so I will tell her in front of you: it is to be strong enough to break in to million pieces and pull all them together again. Endure it, Ino, overcome yourself, then you will become a great ninja."

"Ino-chan…" Yamanaka-san whispered when her daughter started sobbing non-stop; she looked at the boys, then left the tray on the table and stared at Shikamaru "You better leave" her tone was harsh and strong, just like a lioness taking care of her cub "Ino-chan" she muttered, taking her daughter in her arms in a strong hug "Mommy is here…"

Neji nodded and looked at Shikamaru.

So they left.

X

"That was a good move" Shikamaru muttered when they entered the Hyuga compound "To make Ino rationalize, to be responsible"

"Hm"

Shikamaru was feeling nothing, he couldn't read Neji even if he wanted to. Maybe the technique was doing well, and it was going to be solved before his father was back.

"I can't feel you Neji" he muttered when they stopped in front of the house.

Their eyes made contact but Neji didn't look as happy as he should be.

"I feel you" he said "You can't feel me because of the training, I'm much more controlled, neutral, you could say even zen…"

"Oh"

They entered and the small spark of hope in Shikamaru's heart disappeared.

"What do you think about some lunch?" he asked, trying to keep his mind away from any thoughts.

"Sounds good" the Hyuga answered.

Neji helped the Nara as much as he could, although very little as he was not made to be a chef. They laughed a bit talking about some great missions and tried the best not to touch each other. They weren't exactly afraid, but Neji didn't want to feel more attached than he already was, it would mean feelings, real feelings; and Shikamaru wanted to think clearly, but he knew that if he let his body do whatever it wanted to do he was not going to be rational at all.

The Nara wanted to be as cold and neutral as Neji seemed to be, that was the stable point he needed to reach; this way they were safe.

"Someone's coming, not a Hyuuga" Neji said, looking for something to drink in the fridge.

Shikamaru stayed quiet and concentrated.

"Let me try something" he said and closed his eyes. The air thickened around them, making Neji stop and pay attention on whatever it was "Guide me, where is the person?"

The Nara's voice was calm and deep, he seemed as serene as he could be, and that made the other feel kind of competitive.

"Right" Neji leaned against the sink and activated his Byakugan "Near the lake. Do you want me to say who is it?"

"No. It's my turn to train" and saying that he formed a seal with his hands and his own shadow ran through the house, going far far away, sliding like a snake across the compound, scaring people and feeling the different presences in there. He could feel "Tokuma, Hanabi…at the main house…oh, I feel her: it's Kurenai"

"Well, that was impressive" Neji said, watching the other man open his eyes "Were you trying to impress me?" Shikamaru felt a shiver down his nape.

"You know, I think you have a fetish with kitchens, Hyuuga" the Nara joked and walked away, leaving behind a surprised Neji "Look at the pans, I'll open the door."

Shikamaru smiled, thinking about his bond-partie and that face of surprise. He looked around and made sure everything was in a good and tidy state, then opened the door; she was not there yet and he felt that unpleasant feeling of not knowing what exactly Kurenai was doing there...Maybe A-chan was ill, or she needed to talk about the days he normally spend with the girl...He had no idea; so he rubbed his nape and waited bored for the reasons.

"Hi, Kurenai" he said lazily when she approached "Is A-chan, ok?"

"Not as much as I would like her to be" she answered drily.

"What happened?" he asked opening the door a bit more and letting her in.

"_You_ happened" she said, stopping in the middle of the lobby, crossing her arms over her chest and looking concerned at him "_You and Neji-kun_happened".

She sighed, a bit upset with this situation and then she looked at him, a bit mad and a bit disappointed, nodding?shaking her head like she couldn't quite understand.

"For Kami's sake Shikamaru, I thought you were a good influence on her. An example to be followed during her life, you know..."

"Wait, what did she tell you? I thought A-chan was ok with Neji"

"Well she does not understand a thing!"

Shikamaru was having trouble understanding the woman, he would never know enough to truly understand women...

"What are you talking about, Kurenai?" he asked, losing his lazy temper and crossing his arms mirroring her.

"I'm talking about this improper bond!"

"Oh, humor me!" he said baiting "You really think that I'm happy with this? Or that Neji is?"

"How deep is it?"

"It's none of your business."

"Don't be finicky with me!"

"So don't try to control my life. Who do you think you are? My mom? 'Cuz she is quite a fangirl of ours!"

He glared at her. Shikamaru was not a man to be upset or to feel rage, but Kurenai was one of the only people that had this power over him: to push all the wrong buttons. So he took a long breath and tried to calm down, after all this was not going to help.

"Ok, I'm not very happy with your intrusion in my personal life. So please tell me clearly what are you doing here."

"I'm worried about you" she started, looking at him with concern "Akane came home telling me about Shika-kun's new wife, who happens to be Hyuga Neji."

"I told her it was a bond!"

"Yes, and that you were living together and couldn't be apart, what do you think she imagined?"

"She's five years old, Kurenai! You just needed to explain that it's not like that, you should know better about how to raise your child!"

_Shit._He thought, Shikamaru was so angry with her and her assumptions that he went too far. She was looking at him as if he was one of those stupid brats at the academy, like a child, as if he knew nothing!

"How deep?"

"We feel each other feelings" he said and stared at her "Why? Are you going to ask me what method are we using to release it too? Or if we're sleeping in the same bed? Or-"

"I know Hyuga's better than you, Shikamaru. I know their methods and beliefs"

"Great, so now you can leave"

"Why are you so mad at me? Is it because I'm troubling you with my questions? Because I know you're better than this?" Kurenai pressed, pointing to him; she really knew him deeply.

"What do you want to hear?"

"Come on Shikamaru, you're better than this. Are you sleeping together?"

"Why should I answer this?"

"Oh, fuck, you are."

"Yeah, we're sleeping in the same bed."

"Is that all?"

She looked disgusted and he wanted so much to shut her up.

"Why now Kurenai? What's your problem?" he sighed "I can't have feelings for anyone, is that the point?"

"The point is that sleeping with random men in not the example I want you to give to my daughter!" she affirmed and Shikamaru felt Neji's presence closer.

"You never wanted me to be an example for her before Kurenai! You don't want me to have sex with men but you didn't let me stay by your side to raise her properly. You bothered me about how bad an influence Temari was in my life" he breathed "So what is this about? Is this about you having second thoughts about my offer from five years ago? Is it you want me to be with you now? Is because of that that you don't want me to date Temari or fuck Neji?"

"No! No!" she insisted.

"So why?" he shouted "Explain to me 'cuz I hate you so much right now and all your bullshit about raising Akane! Your problem is not explaining gay sex to a five years old girl, your problem is that you want me, but I don't want you anymore!" he said it, he finally said.

Kurenai was watching him with her mouth open, a disgusted look on her eyes, like he was something worthless.

"Do you like him?" she asked, voiceless.

"That's not the point..." he explained, his voice tired from the argument.

"You know how Asuma would react to this? How disgusted he would be? Shikamaru this is so wrong..." she said, trying to reach him "All these strange feelings, they are all because of the bond" she reinforced looking at him "They are not true, you don't like him"

"Yes Kurenai, I get that, but I don't like you either" he muttered.

"I don't want you anywhere near Akane! You're not a good roll model for her anymore."

"I didn't have sex with him."

"Shikamaru..." her voice was trembling, she was scared.

"So what if I have had sex with other guy? Are you going to say how disgusting I am? Or how Asuma would be ashamed of me? Because you know me, but I knew him better, he would never judge me for this."

"You're horrible!" she yelled and pushed him hard against the wall "She's not your goddaughter anymore!"

"Stop it!" he yelled back "How did you become this woman? Where is the real Kurenai, the sweet and compassionate one?" he felt his eyes burn and weep "Are you that unhappy that you're bedevilling me?"

She froze in place looking at him, seeing in his eyes all the pain he was feeling.

"You should leave my house, Kurenai" the strong voice sounded from the back of the lobby and Neji stood close to them "You're not welcome here."

Kurenai ignored him, looking inside the Nara's eyes. But then a strong hand took her by the arm and walked her to the door, opening it.

"Leave. Now."

She felt ashamed but left without looking back.

"Are you ok?" Neji muttered.

But the answer was a strong silence, then a thump against the wall and a wild roar. After that the Hyuga stayed quiet watching the chuunin shake for some seconds, he took a step forward, but the Nara was faster, walking away.

"I need a cigarette-"

"No, you don't need that shit" he said firmly, holding him by the wrist "You don't want to be alon-"

"Who do you think you are to know what the fuck I want?" Shikamaru shouted back, trying to pull his arm away, but Neji was stronger.

"I feel you, bastard" he said and pulled the chuunin closer, hugging him "And don't be a clod!"

Shikamaru felt frozen for a moment before his whole body began to melt, he wanted so badly to cry, of course he was not doing it, but...

"Gods!" he blurted and hugged back, feeling tired, extremely tired.

"It's ok..."

"I hate the woman she became...I hate her!"

Neji held him firmly and felt Nara's fingers pressing against his robes. The Hyuga was feeling his whole body burning, he wanted desperately to make Shikamaru feel good, that bad sensation inside his chest, that loneliness, all the hurt...He hugged even tighter; he wanted to protect him, to make him happy...

So they stayed like this till Shikamaru was calmer and their hearts were in sync.

X

The afternoon was terrible. Shikamaru spent hours sitting in the backyard, watching clouds and drinking bad sake while Neji tried as hard as he could to read something, but he couldn't, he was way too distracted, every time his eyes would disobey him and look in Shikamaru's direction, ten steps away.

Shikamaru was so quiet he could listen his own blood running through his veins. He wasn't angry anymore, nor sad, he was just tired, he didn't want to think about what had happened. Then he would close his eyes and feel the disgust in Kurenai's voice all over again...Why couldn't people just respect each other? Oh how he hated gossip!

So the doorbell rang and Hinata was there. It was a calm evening drinking tea and some more sake, the Hyuga cousins speaking in their neutral tone. All that tranquillity was lulling him and in moments he was far away; over the clouds, remembering how all this started, remembering that day in the clearing, they were training and then got stuck.

_Just stupid..._

He remembered Neji's expression, he was so upset back then, shouting and demanding some explanation or solution...And then his mom assuming they were dating, making Neji blush...So he laughed.

The pleasant sound made Neji and Hinata look at the chuunin amazed. Shikamaru was lying on the couch, hands on his belly with his eyes closed, laughing out of the blue.

"What's funny?" Hinata asked timidly.

But the Nara didn't answer; he just nodded as if he was saying that it was nothing. Neji was watching him overwhelmed by that great sound, he was feeling warm inside his chest, a happy feeling invading his body and Shikamaru's laugh was so beautiful, so infectious that the corners of his mouth were twitching and he was trying his best not to smile or laugh.

So Hinata looked at her cousin smiling happily and Neji couldn't bare it any longer: he smiled brightly, and a second after that he laughed like a child.

It was the first time he had laughed like that, or at least he couldn't quite remember the last time he felt so happy. The weird sensation was making him laugh non-stop and he needed to lie his head on the couch and watch the ceiling.

"Stop it!" he said, laughing.

And then he threw a cushion in Shikamaru's direction, making the man open his eyes, tears falling over his cheeks. He sat trying to stop laughing. Shikamaru was looking inside Neji's eyes, trying to calm down and thinking about how he started laughing, so he just slipped to the floor, beside Neji taking deep breaths, still looking at him. He brushed his fingers over the man's long hair, feeling the soft texture and feeling weird inside his stomach.

Neji stopped laughing and breathed unsteady, Hinata stood up and took the tray to the kitchen, feeling that she shouldn't be there right now. So Shikamaru tangled his fingers in Neji's long tresses and touched his face with the thumb.

"Sorry or being stupid with you..." he muttered, his voice becoming hoarse and tense.

Neji was mesmerized by that outbreak of sentimentalism, the warm inside his chest began to feel like small butterflies, it was wrong, he knew that sensation and it was not proper right now, he was doing so well trying not to feel...

"I just...Kurenai...Years ago..." Shikamaru was muttering and he couldn't speak properly because of the sake he had been drinking "That sucks...Troublesome...Thank you..."

Neji took a long breath.

"You don't need to apologise nor thank me"

They looked into each other eyes. It felt so fucking right that it was completely wrong. Shikamaru was leaning forward, their noses were almost touching, they could feel each other's breath...

"We shouldn't..." Neji tried to say, but Shikamaru was kissing him.

It was just a steady kiss, lips pressing, but it was so intense, the Nara's arms were embracing him warmly. Then Neji kissed back, taking the man's face into his hands he broke the kiss.

"Hey, you drank too much" he muttered, trying to stop the warm waves that were running all over his body. These waves weren't sexual tension, they were soft, sweet, full of feelings that shouldn't be there.

"You're right, I'm going to sleep" saying this Shikamaru went in dizzy steps to their room and Neji stayed there.

"Are you ok?" Hinata asked, appearing from the kitchen's door.

"I don't know how to deal with this..." he admitted looking sadly at her "It's going to hurt me if I don't block it as much as I can."

"Why?"

"Because it looks like more than just randiness..."

"Do you mean-"

"Yeah, and I'm not sure if Shikamaru feels the same right now"

So Hinata sat by his side and they stayed there talking about feelings and the past, and when she left, all Neji could do was watch Shikamaru sleep and pray to God, asking Him not to ruin his fate.

He couldn't fall in love with someone who wasn't in love with him.

"Troublesome" he murmured and fell asleep, side by side.

* * *

><p><strong>AN:** ok, I would appreciate some reviews for this chapter. 'Cuz I'm a bit afraid about how are you going to react about Kurenai... Anyways, we are almost there folks, hope you're enjoying the plot and the characters. Thank you very much! Loads of love!

Other than that, I saw a lot of people started following this fic, and that's great! I'm very happy and proud, though why don't you review? Well, hope you like this one enough to let me know your opinion ;)

**Tai xx**


	10. To Run and Hide

_**N/A:** _I really appreciate your kind words and thank you all for the reviews and faves! As you can see, we're reaching the last curve of this roller coaster. So hope you enjoy this chapter, it's definitely my favorite one ^^

**Beta: Kuroda Miharu :3 thanks darling!**

* * *

><p><strong><em>When Shadows Surround You<em>**

_x_

_Chapter 10 _

**To Run and Hide**

* * *

><p>It was a really cold morning. He could hear the wind pounding annoyingly against the window.<p>

He turned around in bed and felt Neji's warm body, so he cuddled into him and breathed in the woody scent of his hair. Shikamaru felt something soft inside his chest, he remembered how the Hyuga cared for him the day before, and how he wanted to kiss the man but Neji didn't let him. To make it stupid simple, he was drunk but he wasn't out of control so why did he want to kiss Neji so much?

Shikamaru relaxed his body, enjoying the futon and the warm blankets. His body felt natural how he fitted with the Hyuga's frame... He sighed, then when he felt his clad morning erection pressed against Neji's butt his mind froze. He asked himself what would happen if Neji woke up right now, he closed his eyes and hid his face in the Hyuga's nape and hair. It was made even worse because all he wanted was to move against the other man, but he shouldn't.

So the Nara just waited for his erection to fade away.

Things were happening too fast. One day they kissed, the next they were at second base and the night before they reached third base as if it was something normal. The real problem was that Shikamaru was feeling so comfortable with the male that deep inside his chest he didn't mind at all about their make out sections; in fact he was enjoying it a bit too much.

It was such a different situation... Back when he was dating Temari he wouldn't be worried about sex but completely crazy about her developing feelings for him. So he wouldn't sleep the whole night with her or spend too much time together. He was afraid of getting involved.

But right now it was a whole different story. He couldn't leave in the middle of the night, or make up some bad excuse to be alone and to be honest he liked Neji's company, even when he was stoic or paranoiac about their bond.

The feeling was almost tender, like taking care of Ino when she was in a good mood or talking to Choji about nothing. All the small things that used to make his life better but now the tender and warming feelings were for someone he barely knew, in a very troublesome situation but it was still nice to feel.

He felt the Hyuga moving and turning, facing him with half closed eyes. Shikamaru could see his white iris' shining lazily, half awake. Their bodies were so close he felt all the man's muscles contorting while Neji yawned slowly and opened his eyes completely. Two full moons staring at him.

"Morning" Shikamaru muttered, mesmerized.

"Hn" he answered, closing his eyes again and relaxing "It's cold" he said in a stoic tone.

Shikamaru felt dizzy and brought their bodies closer together, fingers tangling into cocoa threads his other hand running over Neji's back. Then the moonstones were glaring at him once more, but it didn't bother the Nara at all as he leaned forward, noses touching, lips brushing, hands grabbing, breaths shaking and he kissed him.

It was calm, sweet but intense. Lips opening, tongues licking softly tasting each other's mouths, biting tentatively, caressing...So Neji hugged him back, feeling completely carefree and craving each small touch. Shikamaru's fingers fondling his long hair was making him feel protected. He took the man's thick hair in his hands, pulling him closer, caressing his nape and shoulders.

They were completely insane; maybe it was the bond but they weren't sure. They were lost within the overwhelming number of feelings inside their hearts, it was blinding them so much that it just felt right. Completely right.

Shikamaru moaned into the kiss, he was so hard it was insane, so he started rocking their hips and the kiss grew wilder. Groans exploded from their throats, Neji tangled one of his legs around the chuunin's waist, increasing the friction, making the Nara break the kiss and start licking his neck, biting it, suckling on it, his hand groping Neji's leg, touching it wickedly.

Their groins were starting to hurt, they needed to release or at least to feel it more intensely. So Shikamaru braced their bodies and went on top of Neji, taking his legs on his shoulders, starting to pull the pyjama pants down, making the Hyuga feel Shikamaru's clad hard on against his boxers.

Neji was panting, Shikamaru was sucking hard on his pulse and making him moan stupidly, the chuunin's groin was thrusting slowly against his, he felt the trousers drop on the futon and Shikamaru was already pulling the boxers down. Neji felt bad.

It wasn't supposed to be like this, it wasn't meant to be at all. They were influenced by the stupid bond and he that was feeling all those feelings for Shikamaru...and the lazy bum was being driven by the randy-ness!

"Stop" he said, pulling on Shikamaru's hair, pushing him off his neck, but the man just groaned and kept touching him "Stop it, Nara!" he warned.

So Shikamaru looked at him, gasping, blank eyes looking inside the moonstones.

"I don't want it like this. I'm not succumbing to this fucking bound" he jerked the Nara onto the futon and stood up, walking to the bathroom.

"Wait, Neji!" but the door slammed loudly in response. "Fuck!" he shouted and groaned "Why are you so troublesome?" he asked to the ceiling and punched the futon hard.

x

_I'm so stupid!_

Neji punched the wall and turned on the cold shower; he needed to think. Why was he being so damned irrational? How could he do this? He, the fucking Hyuga genius, was being driven crazy because of a bond?

_Fuck off!_

He trembled and turned the tap to hot. It was confusing him, he couldn't be sure what were really his feelings and what were bond-influenced. Neji needed to end this, he was feeling ashamed, manipulated, prideless...

"Son of a bitch..." he muttered, feeling his chest ache... he was neutral yesterday, he was controlled, now he couldn't relax. If he relaxed things like that were going to happen more often.

He closed his eyes, his rage increasing each second. Why was he so affected? Why was he so vulnerable near Shikamaru? Why wasn't he strong enough? When was the last time he felt like that?

He opened his eyes scared, staring at the white wall tiles, his heart beating fast, his head aching and his breath much faster than the normal...

"Holy shit!" he cursed, punching the wall again.

His whole body ached and he couldn't believe that, he couldn't manage that...so he pressed his sealed forehead on the tiles and closed his eyes.

"I can't believe in this heart of mine...stupid fate!"

Shikamaru knocked the door, his voice sounding muffled because of the water. Neji didn't want to listen, he just wanted to calm down and change everything; he _needed_to change everything. The Nara's voice was louder now, he was knocking insistently making Neji sigh tired.

"Leave me alone" he muttered against the tiles.

"Neji!" he heard muffled "You...Ok?"

"No I'm not..." he answered silently.

"What...doin'?" Shikamaru sounded concerned and Neji smiled bitter, it was troublesome..."M'not doin'...again...I promise!"

The Hyuga cursed and started soaping his body, slowly, as if it was a ritual and after that he would be clean and without problems...

Shikamaru was pissed off, standing in the hallway. A cigarette between his lips only wearing boxers, his hair falling loose on his face. Ok, he could understand that Neji didn't want to go further; a lot of people see sex as more than just physical pleasure, they see it as feelings, intimacy and even love.

_Troublesome... _

The last thing he wanted was to make their relationship a troublesome shit, they needed to be together some more days and it couldn't be awful; they needed to work well as a team.

"Neji!" he called again "C'mon! It's going to work out, we just need three more days and the fucking old man will be back!" he tried to convince the other, he was losing patience "Ok, if you're that disgusted with the idea of having sex with me go fuck yourself!" he shouted and kicked the door.

Two minutes after that the door was open and Neji looked at him stoically.

"What?" Shikamaru asked moody.

"Go get dressed, we're going to the Hokage Tower."

x

Shizune was staring at them concerned. The pig was in her arms and it made Shikamaru snort. They were standing there waiting for Tsunade for almost an hour. Neji was wearing the same stoic expression since he finished showering, and his aura was completely dark, it was so creepy Shikamaru preferred to stay ten feet away from him.

"Where is she?" he asked "Is she going to take too long?"

"She's with Genma and Kakashi in a reunion, you need to wait"

"Is it ok if I sleep here?"

"Shut up Shikamaru" the stoic voice sounded harsh.

"Fuck you..."

They stayed in that bad mood until the door opened and Genma came out.

"Hey guys, how is Ino doing?"

"She's been troubled" the Nara answered "But will recover soon, don't worry"

"Ok, see yah" he said and left.

"Come in!" Tsunade's voice screamed.

"Finally!"

They stood in front of the desk, Shikamaru had previous ideas as to why they were there and even if he thought it wouldn't change anything. He couldn't just say that to the Hyuga he didn't want to waste time going to talk with the Fifth.

"So, how's the bond going?"

"It's a tremendous catastrophe" Neji said, his voice so bitter it could cut a man in two.

"Why? I thought you were working on the bond release"

"We are" Shikamaru explained.

"Yes, Hokage-sama, but the thing is even with seventeen steps separating us, we can feel each other's feelings and moods."

"Pretty scary, in fact" Shikamaru added.

"And it is unbearable." Neji concluded.

Kakashi was watching them interested; as if he could see more than what they both were seeing.

"So you came here..." the Hokage said "What can I do for you?"

"Do you have any other idea? Anything we could try to break the bond?" Neji asked politely.

"We talked about it" Kakashi said "I can't see any other exit for this. I know it must be terrifying for both of you, but it's just three more nights and Shikaku will be back. You should be more patient-"

"Patient?!" Neji asked, a pulsing vein jumped on his neck and his eyes shone in anger. "I understand it goes beyond your skills, but couldn't you try something else? Ask for some other person? Or at least do not ask me to be patient!" he complained angry.

Neji was out of his mind, not just because he was angry, but because he was talking like this with the Hokage and Kakashi. It was very inappropriate for a Huyga. He sighed loudly and panted, trying to calm down, his anger making Shikamaru become impatient and he wanted to punch someone...so he lit a cigarette, watching Tsunade look at Neji in disbelief, but Kakashi was completely calm.

"Shikamaru, would you mind waiting outside?" Tsunade asked, and the chuunin left without a word. "Now Neji, we're alone, what is bothering you so much?"

"I can't stand it anymore" he confessed, his voice broken "I can't endure it, I tried but it's much stronger than me!"

"What are you talking about, Neji?" Kakashi asked quietly.

"We can't be apart, we do everything together!" he complained "We eat together, we clean the house together, we take walks together...we sleep together..." he looked down ashamed "I can't fight it!"

Tsunade watched him mindfully. The young man was in such a pain because he couldn't control his own feelings.

"What bother you the most?" she asked.

"What?" he laughed "He has too much trouble!" Neji said loudly, so even Shikamaru could hear "Ino has problems and he need to take care of her, his mother is crazy, his goddaughter is an insolent little girl and her mother even worse! Everything in his life bothers me, even his presence bothers me. I wish he was dead" he finished.

Kakashi thought it was normal, maybe Neji wasn't prepared to live this. Without any control over what was happening to them.

"But what bothers me the most is that I like him and I can't fight it back. I fucking like him..." he muttered defeated.

Tsunade and Kakashi looked at him with pity, the man was observing his feet, he couldn't even look at them. He was so ashamed, he was so scared and he had no idea how to deal with it.

Pain bashed his guts and he lost the air on his lungs. Neji growled in pain and lost balance walking back in despair, feeling the pain go away slowly.

"What the fuck was that?" he asked, voice shaking, sweat wetting his face.

"I think Shikamaru heard you wanting him to die" Kakashi said scratching his head in a tic.

"I'll kill that dumb ass!" the Hyuga muttered, breathing deeply and walking away.

"Should I do something?" Kakashi asked lazily.

"No, let the kids be." she answered almost smiling "Looks like the Hyuga has feelings, that sounds nice" Tsunade smiled and looked at him.

"Shikaku is going to kill them..." the copy-nin murmured before jumping out of the window.

x

"What do you think you're doing?" Neji asked disgusted, walking in the shadow-nin's direction. "You can't even stand the pain!" he yelled seeing the ninja leaning against the wall, panting.

"Fuck you!" Shikamaru cursed, looking at the other madly and standing up.

"Are you stupid?" Neji asked spiteful, grabbing the Nara by his vests and shoving the man against the wall again, making him groan.

"Get off me, Hyuga!"

"Ah right and then what? Are you going to walk away and drive us into shattering pain?"

"Didn't you want me to die? So now you don't want it anymore because it will hurt you too?"

"You're ridiculous!"

"No, _you_are ridiculous! When Ino needed help you didn't think twice in doing it; when my mother went all crazy because of the bond, you said she was a nice mom; when Kurenai was stupid and prejudiced you hugged me! You tried to calm me and now you say to the Hokage you wanted me dead because I'm troublesome?! Are you nuts?!"

"SHUT UP!" Neji screamed, thrusting him against the wall, making Shikamaru hit his head and hiss feeling dizzy and angry at the same time.

The chuunin took Neji by his robes and pushed, shoving the man away of him. In a second they were punching each other - or at least trying to. Shikamaru missed the punch directly to Neji's face but achieved a kick on his stomach, making the man groan and punch back, hitting Shikamaru's nose. A strong noise sounded and blood started pouring from his face.

The Nara groaned in pain but it was bearable, so he shoved his body against Neji, making the man hit the wall and lose balance for a second. In that small second Shikamaru's fingers were in the Hyuga long tresses, pulling it fiercely; with all his strength he turned the jounin and shoved him against the wall, pressing Neji's face against it as the same time he was tugging on his hair.

Their bodies were stuck together and Neji couldn't move if he didn't want to lose his hair. So he panted, feeling one of his arms bending painfully up his back, and Shikamaru's unsteady breath on his ear.

"You broke my nose" Shikamaru muttered dangerously.

"You deserved it" Neji hissed stressed.

"Ha!" The Nara shouted right in his eardrum, making it ache "You know I didn't, you said you preferred me dead just because you didn't want me to fuck you! Really? You're this troublesome?"

"Shut up, Nara, it's not that!" he shouted back.

"Stop being a prick and face that we have a bond and we are connected, stuck together. Even if you think I'm a sleepyhead you will need to handle this!" he pressed their bodies together a bit more, jerking Neji's body against the wall, hitting his cheek on it "I'm not lazy when someone pisses me off" he let go of Neji's hair and walked away. "So get out of my way, prick!"

He reached two steps panting and was surprised by a manly voice barking: "Oh my!"

Neji moved slowly feeling his cheek swelling, sighing and rolling his eyes. He wanted to die now. Shikamaru stood still and wiped the blood with the back of his hand, looking at the three people standing there.

"Great Kami, that was super sexy!" Hanbi exclaimed excited.

"Shut up, Hanabi" Neji threatened.

"You really look like a couple, no jokes now" Kiba said, laughing "Are you together? I mean...together together?" he asked over interested.

Neji sighed and covered his cheek, paying attention on the third person leaning on the wall, smirking and looking into Shikamaru's eyes. What the fuck was he doing here?

"Eh Sasuke-senpai, don't you think they look hot together?" Hanabi asked, eyes shining naughty "How is the tantric sex going?"

"Stop it Hanabi!" Neji hissed.

Shikamaru couldn't stop the blood flow, so gave up and glared at the three idiots in front of him.

"Tantric sex? Oh, tell me more about that Hanabi-chan! But looks like they're having a couple fight!" Kiba laughed again then Shikamaru was right in front of him and punched on his stomach as hard as he could, making the dog-nin fall on his knees.

"Shikamaru!" Hanabi cried.

"Stop that Kiba, do you really think is funny to be bonded with someone?" Shikamaru asked dryly and pushed Akamaru away with his free hand "Try to respect your comrades, you asshole!"

"Sorry, man!"

"Let's go, I need to do something with this bloody nose!"

The Hyuga followed him, glowering at Sasuke all the way and listening to what the bastard was muttering to Shikamaru when they got closer.

"I told you so..." the hoarse voice said sexily and Neji wanted to hit the son of a bitch, why the fuck was he playing with Shikamaru? But the Nara pretended not to hear him and so did Neji.

The Hyuga walked by ignoring the Uchiha until Sasuke started again, whispering very close to him: "I wouldn't decline such a good fuck..."

Neji turned in place and glared at Sasuke, Byakugan activated by itself and he was ready to beat the fuck out of the Uchiha but Shikamaru took him by his robes and pulled him away.

"Ignore him." Shikamaru glared at a smirking Sasuke and shook his head disapprovingly.

So they left.

They strode out of the Hokage Tower; Shikamaru was walking fast and Neji was just behind him, watching his back feeling guilty. Their chests were collapsing, there were so many emotions, sensations, feelings, they had no idea what was their own and what was the other's. It was all mixed up, and they kept walking.

So Neji understood they were going to the Nara Clan.

"Shikamaru, wait" he called, making the man stop "You need medical attention"

"No, I need to think" he answered and kept walking.

They were close to the Nara forest, Shikamaru could sense the herd and the stag was quite angry with Neji's presence, he knew who hurt his boy. He always knew. The Nara's head was aching and all he wanted was to feel at home, in the middle of a clearing, watching clouds and maybe stopping the pain in his nose after a while.

In fact it was hurting a lot, he couldn't breathe, everything smelled bloody, he could feel his heart beat inside his nose because of the swelling. Shikamaru had to make eye contact with the stag and try to make it understand that Neji was not dangerous. They went to the clearing near the small lake and Shikamaru went right to the water, wetting his face, cleaning the blood. He took of his clothes and plunged, letting the cold - very cold - water do its work and less the swelling on his nose.

"You'll get sick!" Neji said to a submerged Nara.

Then he just sat there and waited. His face ached and he pressed some chakra points to stop the pain, looking at the lake, feeling cold out there. He was hungry and angry and ashamed and feeling stupid. He broke Shikamaru's nose...

"Shit!"

All his feelings were so confusing. He couldn't understand nor accept his fate. Neji didn't like to feel vulnerable, it was the worst sensation ever, even if he tried he couldn't endure it. The Hyuga watched Shikamaru cleaning his nose again in the cold water and decided to help.

He stood up and walked to the lake, waiting for the shadow-nin to leave. Shikamaru looked at him, still upset - of course.

"Come here" Neji asked concerned "Let me see this mess"

Shikamaru glared and dove, he didn't want Neji to help him not after punching him on the nose and breaking it. At the same time, he needed to stop the bleeding, the pain and to put the nose in place again.

"Don't be stubborn, it'll get worse if we don't fix it"

The Nara sighed and left the water, he was trembling and his head couldn't bare the pain again. Stopping in front of the Hyuga he just looked at him and waited for something. Neji took his face on his hands and his fingers examined the nose, touching it softly, making Shikamaru hiss in pain.

The bleeding didn't stop because it was out of place, and the swelling was worse than before. Neji took the nose between two fingers and moved.

"OUCH! FUCK!" Shikamaru lost balance, but Neji held him by the waist and helped him sit.

"Wait"

Neji pressed some points to decrease the pain and examined his nose, making sure it was in place again. He felt Shikamaru calming down. The Hyuga stood up and walked around the clearing, waiting for all this to stop. He just wanted to get his life back; his missions, his sake nights with Tokuma, his trainings with Hinata and Hanabi...normal life...everything back on track...

The afternoon came even colder, Shikamaru was watching the clouds trembling his wet ponytail was going to get him sick. The clouds didn't look nice, they had no forms just a bunch of grey cotton candies; he couldn't relax as he wanted, thinking about how angry Neji was with him, he even wanted Shikamaru dead because he tried to have sex with the Hyuga! Really, it was way too over the top...

Was the Hyuga mad at him just because of that or he had some weird trauma about sex? Because he didn't look like a traumatized man, he looked very comfortable the other days...Shikamaru stared at the jounin near the lake, sitting like a monk with closed eyes. Maybe he was in love with someone else and it was too much for him...maybe it was Tokuma...

_Troublesome. _

"C'mon, Neji, I'm hungry"

x

"Dear God Shikamaru, what happened with your face?!" Yoshino shouted when they walked into the house "Haven't you got days off? What the hell are these bruises? And your nose, look at this, it's horrible!"

"Thanks mom" he said and sat lazily in a chair by the table.

"You too, Neji, your cheek is almost black!"

"I'm ok, Yoshino-san, thanks for the concern."

"Ice, you need ice!"

She provided them with enough ice for a platoon of shinobi and started heating the food "Did you go on a mission or what?"

"I tried to rape Neji, that's all mom" Shikamaru said bored and she stared at him.

"I raised you better than that Shikamaru!" she complained "Bad joke, isn't it Neji?"

"Yes" he said stoically, he would never talk to his mom like that, ever!

"We had a fight, mom."

She stopped and looked both of them.

"Men, I'll never understand you, everything is a reason for a stupid fight. You should behave and enjoy your time together..." She finished cooking and they started eating. "So, how is it going, this bond thing and life together?"

No one answered.

"Ok, so I suppose you two are so stubborn you can't stand each other...which means you're good, just a broken nose and a bad bruise" she smiled. "I will prepare some medicine for you."

Yoshino left the kitchen after looking concerned at them. Of course they were in a bad situation, it wasn't easy to deal with such a bond but for Shikamaru get into a fight was something very hard. He was a lazy bum and if needed he would run and hide but never get into his fists; this way she concluded they were having a very stressful moment right now.

"You didn't try to rape me" Neji muttered nervy, eating his rice silently.

"Feels like I did, you broke my nose."

The Hyuga rolled his white eyes.

"If you have tried, we would be in your funeral right now, not eating your mom's food." he hissed.

They spent the rest of the evening silently. Yoshino was the only one to talk and ask about them. They were sitting on the backyard with her, drinking tea and listening to the old woman remembering Shikamaru's childhood. The young Nara just pretended not to hear those disgraceful stories and wondered why his mother loved to shame him in front of people.

He lit a cigarette and drank his tea, sometimes looking at Neji who looked strangely lost and lonely. His mom was trying her best to cheer them up, but that was so difficult...the Hyuga would smile politely but his eyes were completely emotionless, and Shikamaru couldn't feel normal, he couldn't understand the other male and it was making him feel pitiless.

It was when Neji asked to take a shower and they went in. Shikamaru lead them to his room and took clean clothes to his comrade. They felt weird alone in a room and the Nara sighed.

"I'm sorry ok, I really was enjoying the moment, I didn't think."

"It's ok, Shikamaru."

"How is it ok? You were mad at me and now you can't even look in my eyes"

"I'm ashamed, I broke your nose, I wanted you to die just because I'm moody" he said "How would I be normal?"

"Just apologise" Shikamaru said, looking at the man in front of him.

"I'm sorry" Neji's moonstones were there, clear as could be, asking for his forgiveness in such a beautiful way that Shikamaru shivered.

"Everything is fine" he said, smiling a little, his nose was still swelling and under his eyes were a great bruise because of the fracture.

When Neji finished his shower it was Shikamaru's turn. In that moment the Hyuga looked the chuunin's room and sat on his huge bed, feeling very comfortable, but inside his chest he wasn't comfortable at all. Shikamaru's smell was everywhere in that bedroom and it made his heart race, he felt wrong here, like he didn't fit beside the Nara.

A noise caught his attention and he saw Yosinho leaning on the door and smiling sadly at him.

"Are you ok Neji?"

"Yeah, just tired" he answered.

"You don't look ok. Can I do anything for you darling?"

He looked at her and smiled bitterly, in fact she could help him.

"Can I sleep in the spare room?"

"Sure thing!" she smiled at him "How many steps already?"

"Seventeen."

"That's more than enough. I'll prepare it to you" saying as she left.

x

He lay on the futon, feeling the blankets start to warm him. The lights were still on, he had borrowed a book from Shikaku-san and started to read it...or at least he tried.

Shikamaru knocked gently on the fusuma door and slid it a bit.

"Good night" he said without looking at Neji.

"Good night, Shikamaru".

It was weird, he felt so alone there, in that empty room, which was a beautiful room in fact...he tried his best to read or sleep, but he couldn't; it was so difficult and annoying he wanted to press some points but couldn't do it properly on himself.

It was almost midnight when someone knocked again on the door and slid it. This time was Yoshino with a tray of tea and cups.

"Looks like you can't sleep" she murmured "I thought some jasmine tea would help"

He smiled and sat on the futon, watching her pour some tea for them and close the door. She was so kind it hurt his heart thinking if his mother would be like her or how would she be...

"Thank you, Yoshino-san"

"You're welcome, Neji-kun" she smiled and gave him a cup "I have insomnia when Shikaku is not here, it takes me hours to get some sleep...tea helps to feel warm and comfortable."

He took a slip. It was great, warm and nice, better than Hinata's tea which was a miracle.

"It's very tasty" he muttered and she smiled.

"Neji-kun, are you feeling ok? You look sad, dear..."

He looked down, feeling weirdly empty and damned.

"It's my fate, I wasn't born to be happy" he explained.

"Well, the Nara's don't believe in fate, you will need a new excuse" she told him, making the Hyuga smile and nod.

"How can someone control their feelings?" he asked quietly.

"Hm. So is that...Shikamaru told me the bond is making you feel each other feelings. It must be hard to handle."

"I don't know what is me, what is him and what is the bond."

She breathed and tried to think how to explain to a young man. She looked at him tenderly and started.

"Are you developing feelings for my son, Neji?"

"I don't know if it's really me..."

Yoshino nodded and took a slip of her tea.

"You know Neji, it's very hard to control our feelings, even when we don't have a chakra bond. So I suppose that with a bond it's even harder and I'm very sorry about that because I can't give you any advice about what is you and what is not..." the woman breathed and turned the cup in her hands, looking at it.

"I assumed it was impossible to differ..."

"Everybody knows the point where you can step back in their feelings, but I'm not sure if with this bond you could sense it or not..."

He nodded. Neji knew he just understood his feelings this morning, and he didn't feel the point of no return during the days before; maybe the bond blinded him and now he couldn't do anything.

"What if Shikaku-san can't break the bond? Do you think I'm going to feel it forever?"

Yoshino looked in his white eyes seriously.

"We can't say. Though he is a very smart man, lazy and stubborn but clever, he will find a way of breaking it." she assured him.

They drank their teas quietly.

"But you shouldn't worry too much, Neji-kun"

"Why do you say that?"

"Because even when we feel the point of no return, we always choose to step forward, even when we know that it's bad for ourselves...you're a brave man, you wouldn't run and hide like Shikamaru, you would stand by him and show this son of mine how to love someone."

She smiled and stood up, taking the tray with her.

"Good night, dear."

"'Night..."

If Neji couldn't sleep before, he defiantly couldn't now. He turned off the lights and turned on the bed trying his best to rest. On his mind all Yoshino's words were echoing again and again...could he show Shikamaru how to love? Could he stop and step back, or would he choose to step forward? What was he really feeling?

It was warm and tender and at the same time it was full of fear and abandon.

Was he in love with Shikamaru? Was it love already? What was it?

So he fell asleep for no more than three hours, when he woke up his head was remembering what Yoshino said. Neji opened his eyes and saw a shadow on the door. He blinked once, twice, but it didn't leave; his eyes focused better and he saw perfectly.

Shikamaru was in the other side of the door, standing in the corridor, waiting for he didn't know what. One hand on the door latch the other on his pineapple ponytail. He sighed giving up and walked away, because he wasn't brave enough to confront what he was feeling.

Maybe Neji really should show him how to stop running and hiding away. Then the Hyuga fell asleep, knowing he wasn't the only one troubled by the feelings.

.

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><p><strong>NA: **Yoshino is my beloved one. omg, I just love her, hope you like her too.

Well, this fic will end in chapter 15, so just more five to go! next chapter we will start the countdown :3  
>As you can imagine, I would appreciate many reviews in this chapie! The more I get the faster next chap will be up!<p>

Loads of love, sweethearts!

Tai xx

**Fanart:** Kuroda Miharu drew a lovely fanart inspired by When Shadows Surround You, check it out: **kurodamiharu . deviantart / #/d5drhaf**


	11. Love is Bullshit

_**A/N:** MASSIVE _ THANK YOU for all the reviews, PM's and kind words! As someone said in their comment I'm very sad too, I would love to keep writing this story forever, though if I do this the plot will be weak and it will lose all magic :/

So I really hope you enjoy this one. Yoshino is completely crazy and I love her just like this. Let's throw them into the firestorm.

And for those who were concerned about INO, well, you will understand everything now ^_^

**BETA: Kuroda Miharu (L) my sweetheart ^_^**

* * *

><p><strong>When Shadows Surround You<strong>

_Chapter 11_

**Love is Bullshit**

* * *

><p>Shikamaru woke up very early in the morning. It was still dark and he was still tired but the young man couldn't sleep anymore. He sat on his bed and waited; he needed answers. In the middle of the night he had intended to talk to Neji, to explain that he felt nice when they were together and because of this he couldn't suppress his instincts the morning before; because it felt good and right and he didn't want to lose it.<p>

But, as always, he wasn't brave enough.

He was very good at making plans, when those plans were about anything but his personal life he was even better; but when he needed to decide something, to make a move, well... Shikamaru always needed baby steps when it came to feelings.

Maybe he should just say he cared a lot about Neji, that it wasn't nice to lose his friendship, because he was a nice guy...

_Damn!_

He had no idea what to say. Shikamaru just wanted to make things clear that even with a broken nose he was ok with Neji. But he stood in front of the Hyuga's door for more than half an hour, even though he gave up he had no idea how he could storm into that room, lie on that bed and ask the older man to let him sleep there because he couldn't sleep alone, because the bed was too big and too cold without him.

Everything sounded girly, everything sounded romantic. All his possible sentences were stupid! He couldn't do that without looking like a fool! Not when he wanted to say he felt bad that Neji asked to sleep in another room.

So he headed back and turned on his bed until he got some sleep.

Now he was tired, the sky was dark, his thoughts were a mess and couldn't sleep because his brain was working too much and it wouldn't turn off anymore; he knew it.

After two hours thinking as much as he could, smoking cigarettes like a junkie and trying to understand why he felt so uneasy when he left the shower the night before and found out Neji was lying in the spare room.

He felt abandoned, they had apologized so why had Neji done that? Was he that angry or being careful with Shikamaru? He couldn't completely understand, it was a piece missing in the puzzle and not spelling it out was nerve wrecking!

He punched the futon unhappily. Feeling tense and tired Shikamaru stretched his whole body and stood up. Maybe he needed some fresh air and a liter of coffee.

_Mom's coffee._

After dressing in some warm clothes he walked through the corridor and looked for his mom, counting to make sure he took no more than 17 steps away from Neji. She was sitting in the sofa reading some book and drinking tea.

"Hey mom, can I have some coffee?"

"Did Neji wake up too?"

"I don't know..."

"Why don't you go check on him, maybe he will want some warm clothes too. I'm going to prepare the breakfast" she smiled and wandered to the kitchen.

Shikamaru thought about it: that was a good opportunity to talk with the Hyuga, maybe find out what was happening to him. So he found a black wool pullover –matching his grey one - and walked into Neji's room. He could hear the steady breath, smell Neji's specific scent. He felt on edge, he was going to drop the clothes there and leave; the Hyuga needed to rest.

The shadow-nin left the pullover on a chair and decided to leave, he shouldn't do this; it was better to let the other take his time and when it was the right moment they could talk properly. But his stupid fate was playing with him and he stumbled on the chair's leg, it sounded like a thunder inside the dark room.

Shikamaru held his breath and waited, but Neji said nothing, so he breathed and started to move.

"What time is it?" the hoarse voice sounded muffled and Shikamaru held his breath.

"It's seven" he said squinting to see the Hyuga "I'm sorry I woke you up, I was just dropping off some warm clothes for you."

"Yeah, it's too cold today" he muttered, without moving "Thanks..."

"You're welcome" he answered, wanting to do something but he didn't know how to, "do you want to sleep a bit more?"

"Hm"

"Ok, sleep well" he said, feeling stupid and walking to the door.

"Nara?"

"Yes?" he stopped promptly.

"I'm sorry" his voice was hoarse because of the sleep "I was very stupid and very moody."

"It's ok, Neji. Never mind." he said and breathed, ready to leave.

"Shikamaru?"

"Yes?" he stopped again, breathing unsteady.

"What are you doing here?"

"The pullov-"

"You would have waited me wake up and ask if I needed one" Neji said with his muffled voice.

"I came to check on you..."

"Hm"

"And to apologize" he admitted. A weird warm wave hit him and he felt completely brave. Shikamaru walked to the futon and sat beside Neji. "I'm sorry Neji, I didn't want to bother you so much yesterday..."

A hand grabbed his arm and he was pulled to the bed, lying over the blankets and looking into the Hyuga's eyes. His hair was splayed over the pillow, his seal was exposed and he looked even more beautiful in that dim light. Shikamaru caressed the bruise on his cheek, it was better after Yoshino's medicine but it was still purple.

"I'm sorry too" Neji whispered "I didn't mean I wanted you dead" he explained with his hoarse voice, a bit guilty "I don't know how to deal with this."

"Me neither" he muttered, turning and looking at the ceiling "The bond is messing with us, it's normal that you're afraid of it getting worse..."

They stayed silently for a while.

"Sorry about your nose" the Hyuga muttered guilty, Shikamaru looked at him "It's better than yesterday, those medicines are a miracle."

The Nara smiled and watched the man. They were silent and the mood changed completely, he felt like they should stay like this forever, which was ridiculous because it would never work out and-

"It's very cold indeed" Neji confessed and moved in the bed, getting closer with his eyes closed.

Shikamaru laughed; was the Hyuga trying to reach him?

"Did you miss me during the night?" he joked being kicked in the leg. "Ouch!"

"Oh, I couldn't sleep!" Neji said ironically and smirked.

So the Nara felt tender, it could be true or not but he didn't mind at all because something inside his heart melted, he could say the same even if the other was joking. He pulled Neji closer, his head over his chest and stroked his hair slowly, feeling warm, happy; feeling at home. They fell asleep.

Yoshino knocked but no one answered, she heard no noise, so she opened the door and saw the boys sleeping with tangled legs. The woman smiled and felt very happy for them.

x

It was very cold and she was wearing casual clothes; grey sweatpants and a purple sweater. Her long light blonde hair was falling over her back and shoulders; she looked tired but she needed to move on.

Ino walked down the street, hands burrowed deep inside the trouser pockets and facing the pavements. The day was grey and shadowy, just like her thoughts. Her mother kept saying she was a great ninja and that she didn't need to quit anymore...her father looked inside her eyes and said nothing, he was afraid of discovering things he wasn't prepared to know.

There were so many things that _she _wasn't prepared to share because that would hurt them all. So the young woman had decided that she needed to start again; restart her ninja life and she should begin with her self-esteem. First of all Ino would need someone to talk to, someone she didn't need to explain what happened, just inform them as to why she was so devastated. This person would be Genma, as he said she could talk to him when she felt like doing so.

The Yamanaka stared at the small door in front of her and breathed deeply, stepping inside the building she went upstairs. Second floor, Apartment 22. She knocked, Ino had know idea if he was there or on a mission but she needed to try. The girl knocked again and waited a bit more.

"Please..." she muttered impatiently.

There was a small noise and the door was open. Genma stood there, a mug of coffee in hands, a senbon hanging between his lips, jounin trousers and a white t-shirt.

"Can I come in?" she muttered.

"Sure" he opened the door a bit more and watched her walk in "Are you feeling better?"

"No" she answered, not pretending she was strong. She needed help and to get this help she needed to be completely genuine.

Ino looked around; she almost didn't remember the living room...she was so drunk that night she even tried to kiss him, but Genma was much faster than her...she sighed and walked to the couch, taking off her tennis shoes and snuggled in the cushions of the sofa; hands around her knees and the long hair all over her shoulders and back.

"You look pretty with your hair down" he said and closed the door.

"Can I have some coffee?" she looked at him, studying the man, the praise was real, she could see it in his eyes.

"Sugar? Milk?"

"Milk, no sugar" she answered, seeing him disappear inside the kitchen.

She wasn't sure if being so direct was the best option, but Ino was so tired of trying alone that she couldn't care less if he thought she was a damaged girl. He came back with another mug and gave it to her, sitting by her side.

"So?" he sipped on his coffee and waited.

"I need to talk."

"I'll hear you" he said, fingers playing with the senbon.

"I'm sorry" she muttered "I got very angry at the beginning..."

"Is part of the process, you know, of acceptance."

She nodded tiredly. Her face was very pale and black rings circled her eyes.

"I was angry because I couldn't blame myself, I needed to get angry with everyone that was in the mission..." Ino took a long breath and looked at him "I preferred to think that life was shit, because it would be easier to live with those memories... with my decision..."

He watched she start crying and did nothing. Ino didn't need someone to pat her back, she needed someone who would listen to her and not be pity.

"In fact it was all my fault. It was my decision...though sometimes it is very hard to accept I chose that..."

Genma waited for the flood of disconnected words and tears. But it didn't come; she was way better than he has expected.

"When you proposed for me to seduce the target and then kill him, it sounded fantastic..." she smiled bitterly "It sounded like a real mission, a great one. Everything was lying in my hands. I felt great, as if I was a very good kunoichi... someone important for the village."

She laughed bitterly.

"Then I understood in the middle of procedure, that maybe I would need to do more than seduce him...and you explained it very clearly: 'kill him while he's coming, it will be easier', and I-" she stopped, tears clinging to her eyelashes "I didn't even think twice, I thought it was going to be my moment, the moment..."

Genma was paying attention to her, waiting to understand the problem, because he was missing something, he needed the last piece of the puzzle. To have sex with the target wasn't something completely unusual for many kunoichi.

"But...Genma, I forgot to think of me!" she said, crying, looking inside his eyes with sorrow and dimness "The blood stained my hands, my skin, under my nails...the kunai was there, well nailed in his heart, all his informations in my mind... but I... I-"

"You what, Ino?" he asked concerned.

"It wasn't just the first time I had sex with a target" she explained and he narrowed his eyes, waiting for the bomb to explode "It was the first time I had sex at all. It was my first time and I had blood in my hands!" she closed her eyes, crying non stop.

Genma breathed, dropping the mug on the table and thinking about what he should do. She was bad, she was terribly bad. Now he could understand why she was feeling terrified.

"Hey, Ino, look at me" he said, taking her mug and putting it with his "Try to think rationally" he advised her.

"I've been trying to! But all I can see is that my first time was with a target and that I crossed his heart with a kunai! If I close my eyes the images keep popping inside my mind, the blood, the smell and he was still inside me!" she said in a weak voice and looked at him in panic "So I stopped feeling...I came back, I wrote the report...I was in a trance..."

Her hands were running through her hair in a maniacal movement and her fingers were trembling. She looked desperate.

"I should have asked you to fuck me first or Tokuma-san...now the slightest idea of having sex makes me feel disgusted with myself and my body...how will I have a normal life?" she muttered looking nowhere.

"You are not going to have one" he answered her and took Ino's face in his hands "You're a kunoichi, you decided to be one, you needed to do that because the mission would have been a failure. You saved us all, protected the village and killed the targeted" Genma said, looking inside her eyes "You're not a princess and you don't need to prove to anyone how good a ninja you are anymore" he affirmed firmly "Ino, the first time for a person is a great moment and your first time saved our lives, we were going to die, you know that" he explained patiently, trying to make her rationalize.

"I'll never find a boyfriend anymore...they will all say I'm a bitch, people already thought that, even when I was a virgin-"

"Yamanaka!" he called her surname and she opened her eyes to look at him "You're beautiful, intelligent and brave, if a man doesn't desire you is because he is stupid or childish."

She breathed and pushed him away, wiping her tears in the sweater.

"I'll never find love" she said "I'll never face sex as something good anymore."

"Don't think like this Ino" he said, standing up and taking the mug back "It's because of this attitude that many men say that women shouldn't be ninja" he hissed and looked at her beautiful face "I needed to have sex with a target because of a mission, it wasn't my first time but I don't like men and it was a big shot in my pride. I saved the mission, I became jounin, I didn't mind how many days I walked stupid and felt pain because no one would ever say I was a coward."

Ino stared at him, panic painted on her face. She wasn't the only one that needed to use her body to make things work during a mission...

"So don't be coward Ino. What you did was hard and sad, but now you can say you overcame yourself and you did your very best even if it was shameful. You chose this path, now is the moment to decide if you're staying or leaving."

The blonde looked at him. He was right, how many ninjas didn't shatter their prides and souls for their village and people? She couldn't give up now, not when she had gone so far, not now.

"I want to become a jounin. The best kunoichi of the village" she said, wiping her face and looking inside his eyes determined.

Genma smirked and chewed on his senbon, seeing the fire inside her eyes. Now she was ready, it would take a long time to be ok again, but it was going to work just fine.

"That's good. I will help as much as I can" he offered and she nodded "And, about facing sex and love as a good thing, well, this will be hard at the beginning, will take a long time to surpass the trauma, to create new experience, to stop remembering that day. But you will be fine" he said.

"Ok" she was still shaking, she still looked lost and desperate but she was trying her best. Maybe some med-nin could prescribe her some medicine to calm down, some days off would work just as well and hours training to think about something else.

"We can talk to the Hokage, she can give you some tranquilizers and days off, we can train and talk if you want" he proposed.

"Sounds helpful. Please don't tell anyone else" she asked sadly.

"Don't be worry, I feel a bit guilty, so I really want to help you" and saying that he smiled tenderly " And...about the sex and love, why don't we date? I wouldn't mind helping you with that either" he smirked sexily and she stood up fast, as red as a tomato.

"Genma!" she yelled at him and the man laughed. She was going to be fine.

x

They woke up at noon. Yoshino was preparing lunch and just smiled and told them to sit and eat. She seemed happy and talked a lot about Shikaku, telling Neji their whole story. The Hyuga looked at his bond-mate, asking for an answer but Shikamaru just kept eating.

In fact, Shikamaru was having trouble accepting he didn't sleep because he had missed Neji's body. It was weird, it sounded girly and now his mother knew he had spent the whole morning sleeping with the Hyuga.

_Troublesome._

He couldn't quite understand and he didn't know how to shut down his mind. His genius brain was repeating and repeating it over and over again. Shikamaru felt guilty, he couldn't understand that...he understood the sexual tension, the desire, the bonded feelings, but not _this_.

_This_ was something inside his chest that didn't let him think of anything but Neji. And now his mother decided it was the perfect time to talk about her and the old man, so that they would feel the romance in the air.

"Mom, can you stop talking about you and dad? I'm feeling queasy" he asked.

"If it wasn't for us you wouldn't be eating right now" she defended herself.

"Neither listening to your troublesome love-story" he answered.

"Fine"

The woman started washing the dishes and they finished eating. It was quite late, around 3 p.m. when they decided to play Shogi and drink tea. So they spent long hours in the dojo, playing and trying not to think or feel anything, because it was already difficult to deal with the pressure, and it would be even harder if they started feeling it strongly.

Neji was trying his best to pay attention to the game and forget everything, but it was difficult and he was losing for the third time. The tea was already cold and Shikamaru's cigarette was annoying him nonetheless he kept testing his patience.

The Nara was restless; he couldn't stop drumming his fingers or smoking. Neji was putting no resistance into the game and he was getting bored. At the same time Shikamaru was afraid to stop playing.

They had woken up tangled in each other arms and it felt fucking amazing! He couldn't understand if it was just the bond anymore, and it scared him to death...the mere scent of Neji was enough to turn him on, to desire the other and to want to kiss him and cuddle... That was too different for everything he lived before, he wasn't ready to live this...he didn't know if it was him or not.

So he hoped it was the bond.

"Can we make some more tea?" Neji asked, jostling him out of his thoughts "Is really cold here and the pot is over."

"Sure!" he answered and they left the dojo.

It was damn cold outside, it would start snowing anytime. They walked fast to get into the house again, heading to the kitchen. Shikamaru let Neji make the tea, he was way better than him.

"So" he said, sitting in a chair "Is it hurting?"

He watched the floor intently while Neji looked at him.

"You talking about the bruise?"

"Yeah."

"No it's not hurting" he said, waiting for the water to boil "But I'm pretty sure your nose must be..."

"A little" he answered.

It was ridiculous, both thought. They were acting like idiots, like kids. Neji broke the space between them and looked inside those dark eyes.

"Can I?" he asked stoic and Shikamaru nodded.

Neji pressed some points making the man hiss in pain and then relax. The pain was gone and so was Neji. They waited for the tea to steam, Shikamaru was now watching the Hyuga and something made him imagine how would it be to have this image every morning. He sighed impatient with himself and stood up.

"We should take a break" he said.

"Eh?"

"Guys!" Yoshino called "Why don't you help me?"

They looked out of the window and saw the woman dragging some wood.

"What are you doing crazy woman?" Shikamaru shouted.

"We're having a bonfire!" she smiled.

"What the hell?" the young man cried out. "Are you nuts, mom? Who wants to have a bonfire?"

"I want!" she yelled back "And be more polite, young man, or I'm not washing your boxers anymore!"

Neji laughed and Shikamaru kicked him hard before walking away.

"Ei! That hurt!" he hissed and followed the other.

x

She had been thinking about it the whole afternoon while they played Shogi. They needed a moment together, a romantic one. So Yoshino planned the whole thing.

They set the wood on the backyard, the boys were completely dirty and smelly, so she sent them to take shower, and started making tea, looking for some of Shikaku's old bottles of sake. She had everything on track and she was going to make them speak to each other properly.

Shikamaru looked anxious and troubled, he was confused and she could see it in her son's eyes. That must be difficult for him, as he tried his best never to fall in love with someone and now it looked like a curse, he was falling without noticing... at least Neji wasn't so innocent, for sure he had been in love once before.

Maybe they could help each other. She watched Neji reading an old book near the bathroom door, leaning against the wall; sometimes he would raise his eyes and look at the wooden door for a moment, then he would sigh and try to read again; or he would finger his long hair somewhat anxious and bite his bottom lip, as if he was waiting the right moment.

When Shikamaru came out of the bathroom, they looked firmly in each other eyes, held their breaths and changed places. This time the Nara went to his room and waited there.

Yoshino finished preparing everything she planned.

When Neji finished Shikamaru gave him one of his jackets and they found her in the kitchen.

"Hey, guys! Why don't you set up the bonfire? I'm almost done here!"

"C'mon mom! Is very cold outside!"

"Oh, Shikamaru, please! We haven't done this since you were a kid!"

"Exactly, I don't like it anymore!"

"And you Neji" she asked tenderly "When you were a kid did you use to set up bonfires?"

"I don't remember very well" he answered kind of stoically.

"Would you like to enjoy a bonfire with some soup and tea and sake?" she asked smiling brightly.

She looked so happy that he smiled back.

"It would be a lovely experience, Yoshino-san" he said.

"Hyuga!" Shikamaru complained.

"What?" he said looking upset at Shikamaru "You should enjoy the fact that you have parents a bit more" saying that he started walking out. Leaving a blank Shikamaru behind, looking at his mother with open mouth.

"Stupid son, go help him!"

He did; not looking at the Hyuga.

When the fire was set and it started to heat they sat at the wooden bench in front of the bonfire and waited for Yoshino.

"Neji..."

"You don't need to apologize, I just wanted to say that because I really think your mother is a very nice woman."

"Ok, then."

Yoshino came running out.

"Shikamaru!"

"What now?" he asked lazily.

"Here, take this" she gave him the sake and put the pan near the fire, with small bowls. "The soup... ah the tea is in the kitchen!"

"We don't need tea, mom, we have sake" Shikamaru joked.

"God, you sound just like your father" she rolled her eyes "Great, who wants soup?"

She served the food and they started eating. Yoshino smiled at them, warming her hands near the bonfire, they looked nice together, maybe she could make Neji feel like he had a mother a while...he was looking at the fire and drinking his soup quietly, she didn't know why but he looked so lonely it made her heart ache.

"Well boys, good night" she said, kissing them good night.

"Wait, you're leavin'?"

"Oh yeah, during shower your cousin came, your granny has a fever, I'm going to spend the night there" she explained, taking the liberty and fingering Neji's hair out of its band, the young man stilled with the touch but said nothing "You two enjoy the bonfire and don't get wasted, please" she warned.

"Oh, c'mon mom, you planned this!" Shikamaru said, standing up "I can't believe you're doing this! Why are you doing this?"

"Don't be boring, Shikamaru, I really wanted to spend the night drinking sake with you and Neji would like that too, wouldn't you?"

"I think it would be much better with you here, Yoshino-san" he said quietly.

"All right, we can do it again tomorrow" she said, walking away "I'll be back to prepare lunch, don't skip breakfast!" she commented as she left.

"How should I enjoy my parents?" he asked rolling his black eyes.

Neji snorted.

"She's pairing us up!"

Neji sighed and stood.

"Ok, you want me to extinguish the bonfire?" the Hyuga asked.

"You don't?"

"I would like to drink some sake and enjoy the fire."

"Right, so you better sit down..."

They were very stubborn, Yoshino thought, leaving the house with a smile and the boys started feeling somewhat warm inside, maybe it was the sake or the soup or the bonfire or the closeness.

The sky was completely dark and Neji couldn't find the moon behind the clouds. He asked himself why Shikamaru was so upset that his mother was trying to pair them up. Wasn't he the one who tried to go further? Maybe now he would rather run than make a move? He felt weird and finished his soup, something inside his heart was sad, he could remember the younger saying he didn't believe in love, so they wouldn't fall in love...

But now what could Neji do? He liked Shikamaru and he didn't know if breaking the bound was going to kill the feeling or not. Perhaps this was the reason the Nara was being moved just by impulses and randiness; because if he didn't believe then he wasn't affected, he didn't take it into account.

"Shikamaru..." Neji called holding his breath. He needed to know.

"Hm?"

"Why don't you believe in love?" he asked drinking a sip of sake and feeling anxious.

The Nara waited a bit, thinking about why he should answer, he looked at Neji's eyes and waited. He couldn't understand why he asked this, maybe he was thinking about love because his mother had prepared a date for them.

He moved uncomfortably in his seat and lit a cigarette, watching the fire. It wasn't troublesome to answer, he was used to it because he had asked himself the same question many times, so the answer slipped his lips easily.

"Love is bullshit; something for a few people like Ino, Sakura, Lee, Choji, even Naruto, but not me. Love is bothersome, is a lot of trouble for me. Why?"

Their eyes connected and both of them shivered unaware. Neji broke the gaze and watched the fire. He didn't know how the other would react but... well he had to try.

"You said 'we are not going to fall in love because I don't believe in love' and I was wondering why..."

"Do you believe?" Shikamaru asked ironically.

"I do." Neji said looking back and watching Shikamaru's expression break down.

"Why?" the Nara couldn't quite understand Neji was one of the men he thought would never fall in love, because he had his goals and love wasn't in the middle of that. Perhaps he didn't know the other well enough to say that...

"Because I loved my parents, and I love my family so why wouldn't I love someone else?" the long haired man said simply.

They looked at each other and Shikamaru stood up. That easy answer, the obviousness of his sentence, the facility to admit he was human enough to feel love. Someone as stoic and dry as Neji shouldn't say that. It was breaking all ideas the Nara once had.

He hated surprises; it meant his deductions were wrong or that he couldn't read someone as much as he expected to do. Fuck, even Neji believed in love, why was he so resistant? He could love as well, or at least accept his feelings.

Shikamaru threw the cigarette into the bonfire and looked down. It was already time to stop being childish.

"I loved Kurenai" Shikamaru confessed his voice was low and bitter "I wanted to raise Akane as my daughter, because I fell in love with her mother..."

Neji watched him, he could see Shikamaru's shoulders trembling. In some way he was waiting for this, to hear from Shikamaru what he had understood the day Kurenai visited his place.

"I felt bad when she said she still loved Asuma and that she couldn't do that because I was like a son or little brother to him...I said I could wait, but then it was Temari and..."

He sighed and looked at the sky. Shikamaru felt something inside his chest, like loneliness, he has never talked about that with someone. It felt good to talk about his feelings even though it hurt a lot. He could remember the day Temari looked at him with those big bright eyes and they spent the whole night drinking and talking about missions. She made him forget Kurenai for a moment and it was enough for him; she helped the pain go away...

"I thought I was going to love her and someday we'd get married..." he laughed bitterly and looked at Neji "But I didn't feel anything, just friendship, it took a long time till she told me she didn't love me either..."

Neji looked back, something sad inside his chest. He could see why Shikamaru didn't believe in love; he has suffered a lot and he didn't accept it because he was afraid of hurting again.

"So we gave up, we weren't even dating properly..."

Shikamaru took the sake and took a long sip, biting his bottom lip anxiously.

"And you?" he asked, his legs were shaking slightly as he waited for the Hyuga to say something, to make the pins and needles go away.

"Me?" Neji looked away, feeling the Nara's bad feelings inside his own chest.

"Yeah, you said I was never going to know who cuddled with you...who is the person?" it sounded harsh, as if it was bothering him.

The Hyuga smiled remembering that day, feeling how the sake was starting to warm his body more than he had expected.

"Well...I can't tell you...I'm sorry."

"I'm thrusting you will not go gossiping about me, so thrust me back" the younger demanded.

"It's not that easy. I..."

Shikamaru stared and Neji laughed a bit ashamed.

"I told you about Kurenai and Temari" he complained. "I'm not going to tell anyone" he said seriously.

"I'm not telling you that" he said drinking more sake "I like this sake-"

"No! Don't change the subject, you should tell me I told yo-"

"Tell me about Sasuke then and I will tell you who."

They faced each other. Shikamaru could sense Neji didn't like his involvement with Sasuke, he was jealous of him. The Hyuga fingered his long tresses and looked intensely inside those black orbs, taking long sips of the sake and giving it to the younger, who did the same.

At the same time, the Nara could feel the older man didn't want to talk about his love life. Like he was doing it to protect himself.

"Fine" he hissed, and his voice sounded bored "It started when he came back, Naruto asked me to hang out with him, because he and Sakura were the only ones who would speak properly with the Uchiha. I somehow felt guilty, so I tried to talk to him."

He sighed and saw Neji's disgusted expression.

"Sasuke is much more intense and deep than people imagine. He's not just a killer, he's someone raised to hate, raised to revenge his clan...so, when he discovered it was a village plan, it was more than expected for him to hate the whole village. But even if he tried, he couldn't hate Naruto, not at all..."

"I understand hate quite well..."

"Then his aura sounded much more interesting than everything. He was great psychological research about human beings. It was not longer after Kurenai said she couldn't give me a try that we started hanging out. He told me about a lot of things I would never imagine, Sasuke talked a lot about Naruto and the way he spoke about him sounded so bittersweet, I don't know when or how, but I craved..."

"You did?" Neji looked defeated now, so Shikamaru made the first move? To know that was horrible and he just downed long sips of sake.

"Yeah, he's very charming when he wants to be."

"Gods, the Uchiha bastard?" he rolled his eyes, and laughed discredited.

Shikamaru lit a cigarette and looked at the bonfire.

"But we never developed feelings for each other" he tried to explain, not understanding why he felt he should "Maybe friendship and a slight possessiveness, but nothing more than that."

He looked at the Hyuga.

"Your turn."

"Ok" he breathed deeply and Shikamaru felt his chest ache and it wasn't his "It was Tokuma...had been him for a long time." his voice sounded hoarse.

"How long?" Shikamaru asked slightly curious.

"Almost five years."

"It sounds like a relationship," Shikamaru muttered sitting next to the Hyuga.

"It was." Neji muttered back, watching the fire and feeling a bit empty.

"And what happened?"

He sighed, it hurt to talk about it, he had talked about it with Hinata when everything happened and that was all.

"It just turned out that we started seeing each other like friends in some point and we decided to break up."

Shikamaru was silent. He could feel sadness and emptiness inside, he didn't want Neji to feel like that.

"Is it recently?" he asked carefully.

"Almost a year ago" he said and looked at the other "But we're fine, it wasn't working anymore, now we're great friends as we were before our relationship. Is just that it was for such a long time..."

Shikamaru was silent. He felt jealous, Tokuma lived with Neji for a long time and he didn't know why he was feeling so bad about this. So he drank some sake and looked at the Hyuga. His moon like eyes were clouded, his jaw tensed and his hands shaking slightly; he could feel it wasn't just Tokuma what was troubling him.

"Neji, I'm sorr-"

The Hyuga hissed madly and glared at Shikamaru

"And now this bond turned my life upside down!" Neji said standing up, almost losing balance because of the sake in his veins, his voice sounding hard "I feel it all over again and it's with you and not Tokuma; I started living with a man I barely know and this stupid bond make us feel each others feelings..." he looked to the Nara's eyes "It confuses me, Shikamaru! Because it's making me feel like I like being with you, cuddling and making out… But you- Shit! I don't know if it's just the bond anymore!"

Shikamaru held his breath looking at Neji.

"You shouldn't stop believing in love just because you weren't loved in return" he said self-assured "Kurenai had a lot of things in her head five years ago, imagine it, the love of her life just died and she's going to have his baby-" he said inebriated, hands running over his messy hair like a crazy man.

"What are you talking about Neji? This is not about Kurenai!" Shikamaru cut him off irritated by the change of topic.

"No!" Neji said, agreeing that it wasn't about her "It's about _you_, Shikamaru, and I'm saying you're completely lovable, so don't stop believing in it...because I could perfectly love you!" he said firmly.

Then Shikamaru froze.

And they finally reached the _love_ level.

* * *

><p><strong>AN:** WHOA! Neji you shouldn't drink you know... hehe!

I really enjoyed talking about their previous relationships. If you like it ** SHARE YOUR THOUGHTS**! as we're reaching the end of the story (4 to go!)** I will accept requests ****THOUGH **not all of them, just the ones that fit in the plot will be willingly accepted and appreciated, so if you have some scene that don't stop popping up in your mind, please tell me and I will see what I can do ^.^

So that's all for today ^_^ (which is much, isn't it? Neji just said he could love Shika OMG! *-* what do you think about it?) Tell me if you like it, darlings! You always flatter me and my heart grow sweeter like cotton candy! (L)

What will be Shikamaru's reaction? o/

Love, sweethearts!

Tai xx


	12. Answers

**_Beta: Kuroda Miharu. _**

**_Warning: lemon._**

* * *

><p><strong>When Shadows Surround You<strong>

_._

_Chapter 12_

**Answers**

* * *

><p><em>"Neji, I'm sorr-"<em>

The Hyuga hissed angrily and glared at Shikamaru, making the shadow-nin feel nosy.

"And now this bond has turned my life upside down!" Neji stood up, almost losing balance as Shikamaru watched him in disbelief.

The Hyuga's voice was so roar that the younger wanted to leave him there alone. What was the Hyuga prick was thinking? That he was enjoying the fucking bond?

But before he could say something in his own defense words kept slipping from Neji's mouth like a curse.

"I feel it all over again and it's with you and not Tokuma; I started _living_ with a man I barely know and this _stupid_bond make us feel each others feelings..."

Rage arouse inside the Nara's chest and he wanted to punch Neji's pretty face. He had no right to get angry with him like that!

"It confuses me, Shikamaru!" the voice cracking and the deer ninja felt abruptly sad and confused. It wasn't his feelings, it was Neji's "Because it's making me feel like I like being with you, cuddling and making out…but you- Shit! I don't know if it's just the bond anymore!"

Shikamaru held his breath looking at Neji. Did he just say he was feeling the same way he had felt for Tokuma? Did he like living together? Was this what it meant to like someone? Was that what Neji meant? And why was he so defensive and angry?

"You shouldn't stop believing in love just because you weren't loved in return" the words sounded harsh, Neji was pressing all the wrong buttons at the same time "Kurenai had a lot of things in her head five years ago, imagine it, the love of her life just died and she's going to have his baby-"

"What are you talking about Neji? This is not about Kurenai!" Shikamaru cut him off irritated by the abruptly change of topic. He wasn't the topic right now and Neji had no right to talk about Shikamaru's past love disillusions.

"No!" Neji said, agreeing that it wasn't about her "It's about _you_, Shikamaru, and I'm saying you're completely lovable, so don't stop believing in it...because I could perfectly love you!" he said firmly looking inside those wide open dark eyes.

Shikamaru froze. He felt his heart race inside his chest and he stopped listening. It felt like diving into warm waves and never coming back. But his body was cold and shaking slightly not knowing what to think nor to react.

When Neji said he could love him, something burrowed deep inside his heart understood that it wasn't that he didn't believe in love, it was just that he was afraid of not being good enough to be loved, it hurt so much and was so scary he preferred to think he didn't believe in it, or that love was bullshit...

Shikamaru was running away from his fears and hiding from them in a lie…because it was easier. But the Hyuga was right there at his fingertips saying he was worth love and it felt huge inside his chest.

"Neji..." his voice deep and the Hyuga looked at him.

"I drank too much" he said, self-conscious "I think we should go to bed" he put out the bonfire without looking at the shadow-nin and started walking adrift.

Shikamaru stood up, his head weighing one ton and followed the other. He was feeling dizzy, his chest was overwhelmed and he couldn't think properly right now. He was looking at Neji's long tresses and back, watching him lose balance once or twice, leaning on the wall when needed. But he didn't care to help, too caught up in his own thoughts.

They walked inside the house in silence; the Hyuga drew their path into the living room and the corridor.

It was so fast…it felt as if Neji was running away from him that Shikamaru felt his chest tighten and stopped walking, he needed to do something. He needed to stop him! To say something! He needed to act-

"Neji!" he called out without thinking too much and the man stopped, never looking back, maybe he was ashamed, or afraid of what could happen now "Listen to me. Look at me" the Hyuga didn't turn and Shikamaru felt his blood stir inside his veins.

He cut off the three steps between them and pulled Neji by his wrist, pushing him against the wall, bringing their bodies harshly together, hands gripping the pale and soft skin of Neji's wrist.

"Look at me?" he asked almost sadly. Bright moonstones blinked and focused, looking at Shikamaru; there was anger, reluctance and even sadness, but he heard silently at Shikamaru "I couldn't sleep yesterday" he muttered, his free hand gripping Neji's nape to make sure he wasn't going to look away while the other made its way to bolter against the wall, the warm of Neji's wrist still burning his palm.

Now was his time to confess and Neji wasn't allowed to run away.

A deep breath reached his needy lungs and he looked inside the pale lilac eyes "I missed you yesterday" he whispered against his lips, nearly touching them with the tip of his own.

The Hyuga looked surprised. His eyes widened looking for whatever lie could be written inside the black stones of the shadow nin's eyes. Neji blinked twice seeing nothing but truth, feeling _his_breath mixing with his own, their lips so close, Shikamaru's fingers pressing over his nape possessively as if he could communicate what he felt with his fingertips...

"I couldn't sleep without you" he whispered gently against the other's lips, initiating a strong shiver down over Neji's spine, Shikamaru's expression showing a slight shadow of impatience to get some response.

The velvet touch of Shikamaru's lips was just millimeters away, his scent making the Hyuga breathe uneven. What the shadow-nin said was echoing again and again in Neji's eardrums, he couldn't keep being cold with his needs; he was burning inside and he couldn't hold back anymore.

_'I couldn't sleep without you.'_

It roused his deepest desires. Neji leaned forward, their breaths blending, their foreheads together, the cold steel of his hitai-ate against Shikamaru's hot skin...

So he stopped fighting.

Neji brushed Shikamaru's lips in a butterfly kiss and his hand grabbed the younger's nape, pulling him closer. Their lips skimmed together, breathing wildly in sync. Both mouths parted at the same time and the Hyuga held the other's body against his, one hand in the small of Shikamaru's back and the other caressing the man's neck; lips collided, Neji's tongue didn't wait or ask for entrance, it just made its way inside, rolling against the shadow-nin's tongue, sinfully, checking his moist mouth in each undulate move.

He retreated the muscle, sucking Shikamaru's lips, capturing the bottom one between his teeth, his tongue smoothing the bruised flesh with small licks, making the Nara moan loudly for more. The shadow-nin clasped Neji's waist and their tongues rippled together, exploring, dancing, playing, licking...

Strong fingers pulled on long silky hair, their mouths parting away for air just to restart kissing senselessly, hands maneuvering strong bodies, fingers clutching in heavy fabric...Shikamaru's thoughts were lost, completely insane; he knew it was wrong, that Neji was wasted and he shouldn't take advantage of him, but he started it and the slow burn was now all over him. His blood rushed as hot lava inside his veins and Neji's hands grabbing his ass at the same time he sucked Shikamaru's bottom lip was driving him crazy.

His half lidded eyes caught a glimpse of Neji's expression; he was in deep pleasure, groaning against his chin, biting it carefully. He was the image of an animalistic god, lost in delight and eagerness and this conclusion made Shikamaru's mind cloud over and he couldn't step back anymore, he wanted it all...

Neji's tongue drew a wet pattern against the Nara's neck, spreading open mouth kisses against the column of his throat, making Shikamaru growl with desire and pant for air; he bit at the bend of his shoulder, feeling its muscles contract and relax under his teeth, his tongue licking on the bite to soothe the pain...

The moist organ sketched over olive skin and his lips took an earlobe, kissing it gently, sensually. The deep breath against Shikamaru's eardrum made him shiver and tense, grabbing Neji's nape and shoulder for balance.

The Hyuga stilled, his breath becoming calm and steady again though deep, and his hoarse voice made Shikamaru moan senseless.

"I'm not going any further, Shikamaru, I'm drunk."

They stayed like this for a while, holding onto each other until their hearts started beating normally and blood started slowing down inside their veins.

"You're sleeping in my bed tonight" Shikamaru said firmly against Neji's cheek.

He hummed sounding a bit tipsy and tired "That would be a pleasure".

Shikamaru smirked, arms around Neji and he moved his head back in order to see the Hyuga's pretty face.

They looked into each other eyes for a while in complete silence. Both of them still needy though they knew it wasn't right and that they shouldn't, at least not like this. Shikamaru skimmed their noses gently and sighed heavily.

"Don't get troublesome, Nara, I need to sleep" Neji said taking the shadow-nin's face in his hands and looking in his eyes deeply. He brought their lips together once again and kissed him softly. "Lead us to bed" he mumbled low and Shikamaru did.

They lay in bed together, clothes fallen over the floor and bed, just tee shirts and underwear left. Shikamaru hugged the man in front of him, smelling his scent and feeling warm, like they were protected like that. He caressed Neji's arm and cuddled, his fingers playing with the long tresses of black silky hair.

"Neji?" he called low.

"Mm?" the ninja muttered sleepy.

"I think you're right" he listened to the elders deep breathing, already asleep, and kissed the back of his head protectively "It can be pretty nice to spend the night with someone you care about..." the whisper echoed a bit in the dim room and they slept.

x

_Neji was lying on his stomach, closed eyes and beautiful features facing Shikamaru, slightly open mouth, fingers clutched into the soft sheets and his long hair spread over the pillow. He could see goose bumps on his arms and the low moans sounded too sexy for his own sake. _

_The shadow-nin sat still on the bed, too caught up in the situation to decide what he should do. Neji was sleeping soundly but what exactly he was dreaming __about__ Shikamaru preferred not to know. He watched mesmerized as the Hyuga moved slowly, pressing his hips against the mattress and humming deeply, the way his fingers twitched on the sheets with a low sigh made Shikamaru shiver with the view of the pale skin writhing sinfully._

_That was way too much for him, he stood up slowly and walked shakily to the bathroom, he needed a shower. A very cold one. _

_He took off the clothes and stepped in the shower, shivering with the cold water against his feverish skin and breathed irregularly, closing his eyes. Soft white skin...slow thrusts against the bed...claws scratching the sheets..._

_Shikamaru breathed deeply, not controlling his mind anymore. It was nerve wrecking. He was trying his best to stop it, but he was completely aroused and Neji's body was appearing in his mind, haunting him. But the bond kept their desires together and even if he could Neji was too asleep to control himself._

_His hand punched the wall but after it slid over his abs and fingers surrounded his stiff member. Tremor broke into his knees making him grab at the faucet and growl, his hand starting to jerk triggering strong heat waves over his lower body. The water was cold but it just added a masochist shiver over his back, pouring on his head and slipping through his skin, becoming warm until it hit the tiled floor._

_"Ah" he moaned, feeling pleasure start coiling in his loins. He faced the jet of water, wetting his face and thick hair, he suck air through his mouth, droplets of water falling in his mouth, pooling and overflowing. _

_Part of his mane let go of the band, some hairs falling over his face, shaping his sculpted features while he corkscrewed his hard shaft viciously, sighing abruptly. _

_It wasn't going to take long, he wouldn't last more than three more minutes or so. But the door was spread open and he saw Neji's frame over the glass door, his hair falling over strong shoulders and straight back. _

_"I'm almost there" the Nara groaned, as if he was asking for mercy and time. _

_But the Hyuga closed the door and stepped forward. Shikamaru's profile was there, completely exposed. Hand working fast on his arousal, stomach contracting with jerky spasms, lungs panting for air with eyes wide shut._

_A growl __ripped__ through Neji's throat and made its way out in a howl, deep and masculine. He took off his clothes, watching Shikamaru's exhibition. He breathed shakily and opened the glass door quickly getting inside in a graceful motion._

_Cold water splashed against his chest, he sighed and took one step jointing their bodies. Both men groaned animalistic, tantalized by the friction. Neji's erection squeezed against Shikamaru's naked arse, his chest pressed against the shadow-nin's back and their skin sliding together. _

_"Oh..." _

_"Fuck this shit" Neji muttered against Shikamaru's ear shell and took the man's throbbing erection in his palm, holding his waist in place, and started handling it._

_The Nara breathed mesmerized, his head falling on Neji's shoulder, one hand grabbing into the long hair of the Hyuga and the other backing on the wall. So much pleasure coiling all over his damned body, trembling his whole frame. _

_Neji slid his groin against round buttocks, shivering and sighing, his voice catch in the back of his throat. He bit down on the crook of Shikamaru's neck and shoulder, sucking it intensely. _

_Their bodies pressed and pushed together, Shikamaru turned his face and his mouth searched for Neji's, tongues meeting out of their mouths, licking and entering their mouth hopelessly. The Nara tilted his ass against Neji's hard-on, provoking a growl in the deep of his throat. _

_He groaned rolling their hips and corkscrewing Shikamaru from base to tip. "Oh lord!" he panted "Neji..."_

x

"Oh lord!" a voice sounded muffled but near "Neji..." the ghost-like moan woke the Hyuga up, feeling hot and sweaty, his groin in extreme pain and need.

His eyelashes spread open, trying to understand exactly what was happening, the bright light almost blinded him but Neji had his pupils readjusted fast enough. All his body tensed in alert and he looked around, recognizing Shikamaru's bedroom and hissing at his sore groin.

He looked over his shoulder seeing Shikamaru's naked back uncovered and sweaty, he was shivering and grunting, but wasn't because of the chill inside of the room, it was different and the stupid statement made the Hyuga dither.

Flashes from the last night popped like curses in his mind and all he could remember was that they have kissed and that he had almost confessed, or sort of...

He watched as the chuunin arched uncontrolled, his tanned skin exposed as the light entered through the ajar window. Fascination caught him up; the scent of sake and cigarette mixing with men sweat draw a throbbing sensation over his loins and he hissed.

_Today is our last day together. _

It wasn't a goodbye feeling but the fact triggered something inside Neji, something that made him stop thinking and start acting. He just wanted to feel one more time, to have Shikamaru in his arms and make them burn together. It felt senseless, raw and carnal.

So he acted.

The Hyuga tossed his own body against the Nara's frame, making the man moan loudly and shiver, too caught up in the sensation to wake up.

He called out his name again "Neji, please...".

It made the Hyuga lose all rationality he still had and a second after one of his hand was tugging on Shikamaru's lose hair and the other was working above the clad erection.

"OW!" the growl fled the chuunin's mouth as soon as Neji's lips kissed a totally sensitive point right under his earlobe, his eyes wide open and the reality taking control of his dream, his fucking wet and hot dream.

_What the hell? _

His mind needed two seconds to understand that he was dreaming about a second base make out in the shower and woke up into a real second base in his own bed. He felt Neji's breath blowing against his ear and closed his eyes enjoying the sensation that spread over his limbs.

Neji was there, craving him.

The Hyuga dipped the other man's underwear and took his hard flesh in his fingers at the same time he kissed his jaw and tasted the salty sparkling sweat on his throat. The Nara was leaking under his hand, moans and grunts escaping his parted lips; Neji felt his gland pulling slightly out of his underwear, too aroused to fit in the boxers. The thrill of skin against skin made him cock his hips unhesitatingly, panting against Shikamaru's skin and jerking him off faster.

His clad hard-on thrusting against Shikamaru's unclad buttocks, making him hiss and pant for air and release. Neji was at a loss, there were so many feelings, but feelings he could fight back, hide them inside his stoic façade, but raw desire no...it made him act out of character and dive in. He could lose his mind keeping it up.

He drew open mouth kisses on Shikamaru's jaw and neck, both men sighing and bowing, their bodies bound together in extreme pleasure.

"Shikamaru..." he breathed roughly, biting on the exposed ear lobe, sucking it to soothe the sharp pain.

"God, Neji" the Nara hissed, losing it "Finish me! Do it!"

And the command worked out perfectly. Long damp fingers stroked against the pre-cum moistend flesh. Roughly, raw pleasure surrendered Shikamaru's body and he arched uncontrolled coming under Neji's tight grip, pressing his ass over and over against the jounin's almost uncladded length, driving him into shattering bliss too.

"A-ah..." the groan fled the Hyuga's lips and reached the other's eardrum, making Shikamaru breathe deeply.

"Dear god" he muttered, feeling oddly empty. Neji's breath still rhythm-less and hard, his hand still holding Shikamaru's shaft, as he didn't want to let it go and let it end.

Neji closed his eyes, lips kissing the bruised fur softly, a mix of emotions colliding inside his chest. The rapture of the strong orgasm and the knowledge that it was over.

Today was the day of saying goodbye. He held onto Shikamaru's body, his long fingers drawing patterns over the tanned abs, his palm stopping on top of the Nara's pulsing muscle, feeling it' beat.

He smelled the whole scent of Shikamaru's body, the tip of his tongue tracing the shadow nin's jaw-line. He needed to let go, but before he could move the Nara held his arm and their fingers tangled together, fitting perfectly.

White marble and olive skin.

Shikamaru turned on the bed, facing Neji. Their eyes keeping the glance, the deer-nin's hand caressed Neji's beautiful feathers, their foreheads locked together and their noses brushed, breath mixing and strange feelings aching inside manly rib cages.

"Neji" it sounded pained and the Hyuga closed the distance, their lips skimming, wet and eager, clashing together, tongues thrusting an oh-so-needed last kiss. Hands fisting hair and tongues circling, pushing, seeking for more.

Maybe there were some meaning beside the desperate sucks and licks but they had no time to figure it out.

It was a short-lived kiss, because a deep voice crashed the silence of the house.

"Yoshino?" Shikaku's lazy tone called from the front door and both men stilled.

x

"Thank god you're back!" Shikamaru said leaving his room wearing a loose yukata "Dammit, when I need you to play the father role you're out in mission!" he almost yelled "What took you so long?" he demanded and looked straight at his father's eyes.

"Oh, good mornin' to you too, Shikamaru" he said dropping his backpack and stretching "Where's your mother?"

"At gran's house, she had a fever."

"Not true, your grandma is in Suna travelling with her friends for the month" he said, sitting heavily on the couch.

"So maybe she's cheating on you, old man" he smirked.

Shikaku rolled his eyes lazily and watched his son. Flushed cheeks, hickey on the neck, odd smell.

"You stink" he muttered, a smirk arising on his lips "Did I interrupt somethin'?"

Shikamaru hissed.

_Yeah, perfect timing indeed._

"No, dad" he answered bored "Why don't you do some tea for us?"

"Do I look like your mother? Why don't _you_do this tea, eh, I would much appreciate a hot shower right now..."

"Did Tsunade tell you?"

"Tell me what?" he asked, kicking off his sandals and stretching over the couch.

"Shit dad, you know nothing?"

"I know I should come back as soon as possible."

"Because of me, old man!"

"You?" he sat straight "Are you ok, son?"

"No dad. I'm bonded."

"Eh?" Shikaku looked confused. "Bonded with what?"

It was an odd silence as Neji appeared from Shikamaru's bedroom door, wearing his usual robes, hair held back in a band, looking as stoic as ever though a bit shy. His father looked from one to the other as he couldn't understand a thing.

"With me, Shikaku-san" the Hyuga said watching the older Nara widen his eyes worried "I'm very sorry" he added politely.

Then Shikaku's fast mind made a path right away to the stupid situation they were in. Hyuga Neji in his house this early in the morning, Shikamaru's weird smell - which he didn't want to think about right now - the hickey, the hurry in his son's voice, the fact that Shikamaru didn't step too close or move away...

"Dammit!" he hissed, his face lightening with the devastating conclusion. He stood up and glared at them deadly seriously "What the _fuck_ is happening here? And where the _hell_is Yoshino when I need her?"

Shikamaru had the insight that she must have felt his chakra because Yoshino stormed through the front door a minute after Shikaku started freaking out. He was very mad at them and asking about the bond points and scolding their stupidity, while walking around the small the table in the middle of the living room.

The chunin felt completely relieved when his mother came in, flushed and panting, looking like she had been running to get there before her husband killed them.

_Perfect timing, mom! _

"Hey honey" she said, trying to calm him down, stopping his laps around the frigging table and patted his shoulder.

"Don't start" he warned her "What the hell is happening in this house? Eh?" he sounded angry though it wasn't something normal in his usual laid-back behavior "I give you some days off getting my fat arse far away from here and when I come back it is a fucking mess?" he looked huffy "Why did you leave them alone?" he was very dissatisfied "Eh? You even lied to them!"

Neji was watching on very ashamed. He felt somewhat guilty and in the middle of a family-thing, as if it wasn't his business although he was stuck up to the neck in this shit. Something in the situation triggered his interest; the strange dynamic that started caused him to stare astonished. Because the man would criticize his wife and she would reply just as harsh as him, not giving the husband any chance in that haggling.

"Come on Shikaku, stop! The boys don't need to hear your crappy bullshit!" she said loudly "We don't need you freaking out right now."

"What were you thinking?" he asked massaging his temples "How many steps?"

"Seventeen" they said in sync.

"See! Care to explain why were you sleeping in the same room? No, better, don't tell me because m'not sure I want to hear it!"

"Shikaku!" Yoshino policed him.

"Can't you two think a little bit? Why does the whole village call you two 'genius' for blatantly being stupids? Didn't you imagine what could happen when you're bound and hav-?"

"Crazy man!" Shikamaru hissed tired of the shitty situation "Do you really think we're happy and glad with this frigging shit? That we enjoy being together 24/7? That this desire-feelings-love-bond is very entertaining?"

"What a damned drag!" Shikaku mumbled falling on the sofa.

"Boys, why don't you go take a shower? Eh?" Yoshino suggested, smiling at them "Clean up, calm down and come back, we will discuss it drinking some tea as adults" they nodded and she shushed them "Great, come on boys."

"Yoshino!" Shikaku hissed in dislike.

"_Separately_, or your father is going to have a heart attack" she added and they disappeared in the hallway. When the guys couldn't hear her high pitched voice anymore she started again.

"Baka! The kids have feelings, do you think this last week was easy for them? You should have seen their faces yesterday! They understand nothing, they're completely confused! They needed to work things out for themselves, so stop being spoiled, chill down and listen to me:" she bent down, looking inside her husband's eyes "We are parents, Shikaku, we don't judge them, we just help the boys out, remember? You taught me that, Shika."

The concerned look in her dark brown irises and the sweet tones in her voice made him sigh and pull her in a hug.

x

Neji's head was spinning. A strong headache making him even more silent. He took his shower fast and tried to quiet down his mind and heart, but couldn't. The cold water wasn't enough to make it stop.

_Stop it! _

He felt a growl climbing his throat but swallowed it. Everything was happening too fast and he couldn't keep up.

They had explained everything to Shikaku. Since the very beginning; the chakra fusion, the small chords that keep them together, the start of the physical synchrony, the development into feelings linkage...

Neji needed time and space now.

_Endure it..._

When Shikaku arrived, they were abruptly split and Shikamaru smiled happily, his eyes shining with happiness, a kind of feeling that Neji couldn't feel in that moment because that moment was their treasured kiss-goodbye and it was broken out of the blue.

_"He's here!"_

He could close his eyes and hear it over and over again. Watching the Nara jump out of the bed and clean his skin with a towel, putting a yukata on and leaving the room anxious.

That anxiety pushed all the wrong buttons, Neji needed to swallow the bad taste of crashing inside his chest and to blink several times to not let his eyes do something stupid.

Like crying.

_The hell!_

He forced his chakra to his feet and jumped five feet ahead of Shikamaru, toeing the roof of another house and increasing his speed. Something sad was mixing with the sickening taste of rage. They needed to call his uncle and grandfather and meet the Nara's at the Hokage Tower in twenty minutes.

He wasn't ready for it.

Yoshino's calm voice sounded in the back of his mind, her soft smile directed to him while they waited for Shikaku and Shikamaru to close the damn door.

_"Are you ok, Neji-kun?"_

He managed to smile sadly and nod, looking away a minute after. Something was wrong with him, very and deeply wrong...

"Hey!" Shikamaru called out, making him lower the speed "You all right, Neji?" he asked, getting closer.

"Hm" the Hyuga hummed and breathed "Let's say that your father doesn't look very friendly right now" he lied.

"Don't bother, he'll get over it. He's is just shocked."

Neji nodded and sped up. He didn't want to talk, he just wanted to end it as soon as possible so he would have enough space and time to deal with his feelings alone. He tried to smother the pain thinking about their intimate moment first thing in the morning and the slow shiver that burned the small of his back made him smirk.

That was good.

They ran even faster when entered through the Hyuga compound and headed to the Hyuga Main House.

"Hiashi-sama" Neji greeted, entering in the dojo where Hinata and Hanabi were training together "Shikaku-san is back, he asked for your and Hideki-sama's presence at the Hokage Tower."

"Oh, the shadow man is back. Good, I'll find you grandfather and we see each other there" he said stoically and ordered the girls to stop. They did and saluted Neji - one very shy and the other completely enthusiastic.

Hiashi walked him out and looked at Shikamaru who was waiting outside, a cigarette between his lips and looking a bit anxious and very out of his lazy character.

"Hiashi-san" he greeted and the man looked seriously at him.

"You look happy" he stated in his baritone voice.

"Shouldn't I? We're finally breaking it, back to our lives."

"I always thought you were lazy, looks like you miss your work and missions what is very dignified" he concluded, watching the small changes in the young man expression, as if he didn't think about it before. "See you there, Neji" he said and walked away.

"Quit this shit" Neji said looking at Shikamaru's cigarette.

He frowned.

"I have a headache the smell is making it get worse, you don't want me pissed off right now, do you?" his dry voice made Shikamaru nod. He wasn't sure enough about what was happening to Neji; he wanted to break the bond and stop the massive complications and now he was as harsh as a cat tongue.

The shadow-nin extinguished his cigarette and watched the other start walking.

Shikamaru felt bad, so bad he knew it wasn't his.

"Wait, Neji" he said, taking the man by his wrist, their skins burning with the touch "Don't feel like this, please" the soft voice drew a silver in the Hyuga's body "We're going to be ok" he kept talking and stepped closer, his chest against Neji's back, breathing over the long cocoa tresses "It's going to stop when the bond is over" his fingers caressed Neji's wrist, they trembled with the slight touch "We'll get used to it and-"

The hard pull made Shikamaru's eyes widen, the Hyuga stepped forward and brought his wrist to a safer position, far away from the others' touch.

"Save your bullshit, Nara, I just don't want your father talking more than the necessary in front of my uncle and Hideki-sama, I don't need that."

Shikamaru snorted and they started walking. Neji could feel the pain and rage mixing, he didn't lie, he really didn't want his family to know what exactly happened between him and Shikamaru. But what was bothering him the most was the stupid smile and the simple way the Nara was dealing with the situation.

It was hurting him without his will.

When Hideki-sama entered in the room, Neji was standing far from the Nara couple and Shikamaru was watching him silently from the window, five steps away.

Nara Shikaku was looking damned bored and his wife smiled politely at them. Kakashi and Tsunade were talking quietly.

"Hideki-sama, Hiashi" she greeted and they sat in the spare chairs "Well, now I think we can start, shall we Shikaku?"

"Hn" he hummed and sat straight "First, I apologize in name of my whole clan and especially my son for being so clumsy and driving Neji and your whole family into this pitiless situation" he stared at Shikamaru for a second and looked at the Hyuga leader "Though no one did it on purpose, not even Shikamaru. In fact he didn't even know he could bond themselves with his shadows."

The chunin's mouth gaped open and he watched his father in disbelief. He had said before he was going to explain the whole problem just once and refused to say what was happening until now.

"As I'm sure Kakashi and Tsunade-sama may have imagined, this is the Nara's Clan Secret Jutsu."

Hideki crooked an eyebrow in suspicion.

"And how does it work, Nara-san?" his strong voice sounding challenging.

Neji's heart raced, it was an explanation to be given.

_Looks like fate is going to provide me with some answers._

"Well..." Shikaku sighed "It's a drag to explain, so I will use a well-known and old legend to make you understand. It's the same way the old leaders of our clan wrote down the Secret Jutsu."

Everybody went very still. Tiny chords pulling inside Shikamaru's chest; curiosity spreading all over him. Why the hell he had never listened to that?

The fingers of curiosity crawled inside his brain and he watched from the corner of his eye Neji becoming mindful and focused.

"What legend?" Hiashi's voice sounded calm, but the air stiffed.

Tsunade breathed easily, Kakashi lowered the scroll he was reading and the both older Hyuga paid great attention, while Yoshino just smiled and looked at her husband softly.

"_Akai Ito_" Shikaku said.

The young Hyuga gasped and Shikamaru raised a brow.

"Are you kidding Nara?" Hideki asked somewhat amused and laughed heartedly.

"I am not."

"_The Red String of Fate_?" Neji breathed the words shakily. A storm arising inside his chest and he didn't know if it was him of Shikamaru or if both of them were terribly confused.

His white moonstones eyes stared at midnight black ones, they hold the deadlock and their breath in sync.

_Seems like fate is not willing to give me a break. _

They felt alone in the room.

Just them.

Nara Shikamaru, Hyuga Neji and the strong red string of fate that bound them together.

* * *

><p><strong>AN:** _MASSIVE_ thank you for all your lovely reviews, feedback and PM's. You made my days and real life much better with your warm words. I'm sorry for the delay, but life is not always a piece of cake and then this kind of things happen, hope you apologize me.

So...what about the make out? It was hell to write! And Shikaku's reaction, dammit, I had no idea how this completely laid-back man would react, so I mixed it with a bit of normal fatherly reaction...

_Akai Ito:_ I know a lot of you dears know about it, if not, don't worry I'm going to explain more in next chapter! Hope you liked the twist in it and how it came out.** Please, share your thoughts! **

Loads of tea, chocolate, love and warm embraces for you all, my dears! :3  
>xxx Tai<p> 


	13. Akai Ito

**_Dear readers, your support makes my life better, my writing easier and my heart happier. THANK YOU! :3_**

**WARNING: The concept of _AKAI ITO_ in this fanfic is based in the real ancient legend of Japan (which was created in China, in fact). In the old traditional concept though, the red thread of fate connects you to all people you get to know during your life, some bonds are stronger than others. So please, I'm sorry I'm not using just the traditional love-concept :/ Be careful with the flashbacks ;)**

**Beta: Kuroda Miharu (L)**

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><p><strong>When Shadows Surround You<strong>

_Chapter 13_

**Akai Ito**

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><p><em>He couldn't remember very well, but it was a summer day.<em>

_It was so hot that all the windows and shoji doors were spread open. The soft wind tried in vain to lighten the thermal sensation as did the fan in the corner of the living room._

_He was still in the Academy and he couldn't remember why but Chouji and Ino were there. They couldn't have been more than ten or eleven._

_They were eating homemade ice-cream and Yoshino was looking for a second fan, she wasn't sure where it had been put away. After that Shikamaru felt lost and didn't remember how, but they were sitting in the same place, in front of the two fans and Yoshino was telling stories._

_"Akai Ito" she muttered as if it was sacred and Ino went all interested "The Red String of Fate" she explained and Chouji watched her "Is how life works, nothing happens without a meaning, everything is coordinated, strategized and every step has a purpose"._

_"How does it work, Yoshino-san?"_

_Ino's eyes were wide open and her strawberry ice-cream had dirtied the corners of her heart-shaped lips to a pinky tone._

_"An invisible thread connects those who are destined to meet; regardless of time, place or circumstance. The thread may stretch or tangle, but will never break." Yoshino said her voice sounding like his grandmother's when she tells stories, phantasmagoric, over dramatic, deep._

_Shikamaru looked at his mom as if she was crazy, Ino applauded stupidly and Chouji kept eating._

_"So it's about love!" the blond haired girl said, her eyes shining._

_"All kinds of love, it depends on the occasion. Like friendship" she started "All of you are bound to be friends forever. The Nara clan don't believe necessarily in fate, but we believe that people are together for a purpose; Akai Ito is bonding them, because together they are better and they will achieve their purposes, like helping each other."_

_"What a drag, mom..." the small Shikamaru shrugged._

_Yoshino chuckled and her slim fingers ran over her long dark brown hair, there were no white threads yet._

_"It's true, Shika...your father and I, for example, we were bound to be together and have you. As well as Ino and Chouji's parents..."_

_"Sounds way too easy, it's bullshit!" he insisted, his mind running fast and perceiving that it was too fatalistic to be real, life was way more complex than that._

_"Watch your mouth kid."_

_He pouted, eating his ice-cream and looking at the ceiling. So people are bound together to do greatness...well, then his father, Ino's and Chouji's were bound together to be good ninja?_

_"Then dad, Inoichi-san and Chouza-san...?"_

_"Yes. InoShikaCho..." she smiled nostalgic and looked at them "They are bound to make Konoha a safer place for us"._

_"Oh! So Sasuke-kun and I are bound to get married!" Ino exclaimed happily, a bright smile graced her lips._

_"Please, Ino, don't be troublesome, ok?" Shikamaru asked, looking outside of the shoji doors, the soft cotton clouds were there in the middle of the bright blue sky._

_What if it was true and they were always bound to someone, or to everyone they meet? What if they had a real red thread on their pinkie finger that kept them together in order to be better and stronger people?_

...

_It's true. _

His heart skip a beat.

He drew a shaky breath through his lips and looked at his mom; she was calm and unaffected as if she had imagined it before.

_She knew...?_

The question stuck in the middle of his chest, causing a sharp pain in his core. Neji looked at him questionably not understanding the strange feeling.

So she knew from the very beginning and said nothing?

"Mom..." his voice sounded hoarse with the anger, trembling in the back of his throat.

"She didn't know" Shikaku said motionless, his eyes still piercing the leader of the Hyuga Clan "She knew about the myth as the whole village knows, but she had no clue about your bond."

"Is this really _Akai Ito_, Shikaku-san?" Neji asked, the dagger still stabbing in his chest and he didn't move his eyes from Shikamaru's back.

"No, Neji, _Akai Ito_ is just a _legend_" Yoshino answered, her sweet eyes aiming at the young Hyuga man and pulling all his defenses down, making him ask how she did it, when did she get this close to him? She smiled simply and when her soft voice sounded again it was directed to Shikamaru "I didn't know our clan had a Secret Jutsu, nor that the best explanation for it was the _Akai Ito's Myth_. Although now, if I make some effort I could have put the pieces together."

Kakashi chuckled.

"So how does it work? Is this meeting going to end in an arranged marriage?" he asked amused.

"No" Shikaku and Hiashi said at the same time, irritation well outlined in their voices.

"Then you better finish your damn explanation, Shikaku, it's making me have a headache" the Godaime said, massaging her temples under her blond bangs "How does the jutsu work? And how do we stop it, if it can be stopped."

Jitters took hold of Neji's body, even if he didn't let it appear in the surface of his stoic façade. He could feel his fingers shaking slightly and the his jaw contracting; the Hyuga knew Shikamaru could still feel him, but he had no intention of trying to lie about how he was feeling, mainly because the Nara should be as nervous as him and their distress was obviously mixed in their rib cages.

"It's a secret jutsu, so I ask the permission of explaining it just for the ones intrinsically involved."

"Fine, Kakashi, Hideki-san and Yoshino, you're dismissed" the Godaime said "Hiashi, you can stay, as you're the leader of Neji's clan."

Hideki snorted rolling his eyes, but accepted the demand without a word so did Yoshino, both exiting the room without complain.

"Shikaku-san..." Kakashi muttered guiltily.

"Kakashi..." the Fifth breathed.

"Hai-hai" he muttered and jumped out of the window.

Shikamaru's heart beat sped up and he pulled in air harshly. It was the moment they were going to understand everything.

_Why us...why like this..._

His mind formulated the questions and he took a grip on them, waiting for the right moment to mouth them. He lit another cigarette and his eyes looked on Neji's, his stoic expression not cheating him; the young Hyuga was as curious and anxious as him, he could see it through the moonlike eyes, he could sense it under his skin, inside his bones, in the slight motion of his fingers pressed in a fist to deny his inquietude.

"Care to explain, Shikaku-san" Hiashi asked, his stoic Hyuga features remaining as expressionless as Neji's.

"It's not a simple Jutsu, as is not a Jutsu someone can use as they want. The jutsu choose the ninja, not the other way round." he said, seeing the Hyuga leader nod as Tsunade "So Shikamaru didn't want or knew how to use it" he explained.

Shikamaru breathed heavily, it wasn't his fault.

_Please say it's not Neji's either... _

"As you may know, our clan work with Shadows, so our shadows sometimes can make things others' wouldn't."

"As in bonding people together?" Tsunade asked looking at him.

"Yes."

"So considering _Akai Ito_, we should say this shadows of yours can work as matchmaker?" Hiashi meticulously put it in sharp words.

"No. We're not talking about _love_ here" Shikaku cut him staring at the Hyuga discontented "We're _ninjas_, Hyuga, not _girls_".

Neji breathed thickly. His mind spinning as never before, he could understand the explanations but it wasn't enough, it was weak and subjective, he needed more than that. He felt the muscle of his jaw twitch slightly and blinked slowly trying to focus on the discussion, trying to get under the words and under the inhospitality between clans.

As if he was heard Shikamaru got impatient "Dad, can you just explain what's going on? I'm not getting it! Neji and I are the affected ones, not you or Hiashi-san."

The creepy look his father gave him made the hair in his nape raise and a shiver spread through his spine. But the deadlock ended with the Goddaime's sigh.

"The shadows choose someone who could help you to improve your performance as a shinobi, the one person that would be the best to work with" Shikaku said simply.

"Troublesome..." the young Nara tapped his forehead.

"I'm sorry Shikaku, I can't quite understand how being attached to someone this close would be good for any of us" Neji said.

It wasn't making any sense at all.

"Well you wouldn't be attached steps away if you weren't a damn Hyuga" he said bitterly and in a second the atmosphere tensed and stiffened.

Shikamaru could sense it, his father's shadows rolling under their feet and Hiashi's chakra agglomerating on his hands. Tsunade rolled her eyes unaffected.

"As I _am_a Hyuga could you explain the difference?" Neji risked, his voice quieter than normal.

_Good tactics, Neji. _

"You two said earlier that you were doing a chakra points recognition, you were working on Shikamaru's soft spots to make him get a grip on them and work them out, am I right?"

"Yeah, dad."

"So Neji was using his chakra to detect these points, he was pushing them" he started just to be cut a second after.

"The Chakra Assimilation" Hiashi muttered.

"Exactly."

"Damn, why you need to be so complicated?" Tsunade breathed impatient "Care to explain?"

"Neji assimilated Shikamaru's chakra" the Hyuga said "It means they merged their chakras."

"And this made the fusion stronger, as the shadow could get a grip on Neji's chakra as much as it wanted to" he snorted "Did you use your shadows on him during the process, kid?"

"Of course I did" Shikamaru said bored "Tsunade-sama asked Neji to help me so we were doing it."

"I'm sorry" Neji muttered low.

"Don't need to be" Shikamaru said back "As you can see the fault is not ours, it's my Clans' because they don't inform their kids about their own shadows!" he said harshly, panting as the words fled from his lips in an uneasy tone.

"You were fusing chakra, damn, who does it?" Shikaku gasped, pressing his temples with his fingertips, it was driving them to an end, to the edge, and he didn't know how they were going to react to its' end.

"Well we did" the chunin answered, losing his patience "Dammit, what should we do now? Is that even reversible, dad?" his chest ached and pushed him onto a point where his mind wasn't working anymore, he had no idea of what could happen now, he just needed the goddamn answers.

_Fast, old man!_

"Well as your shadow entwined with Neji's chakra, because it chose him to be the best comrade for missions, we just need to undo it."

A light solace made its way through their chests and Tsunade moved in her chair, looking relieved and less concerned.

Hiashi was gripping on the arm of the chair and trepidation climbed inside the guys chests, like small spiders running under their skins. Like in a crescendo their breaths reached a pitch in tandem, eyes wide open, fingers pressed in fists and concern drawn in their features.

But was Neji the one who asked shakily "And how does it work? How do we undo it?"

"_I don't know._"

x

_His bare sealed forehead touched an identical surface. Pale green curse marks sliding tenderly, both teenagers trying to control their deep breaths, they hold onto each other to keep awake and keep together, the bliss was still shaking their limbs and hearts._

_Neji was sure they were beating in sync._

_He drew his hand to caress his cousin's face, his fingers removing Tokuma's loosend bangs away from his eyes. Neji's breath was thick and deep in the back of his throat; he felt sore and tired and pleased all at the same time._

_"This is so wrong, Tokuma..." he muttered hoarsely, feeling the soft futon under his left side as he moved slightly on it._

_Their eyes met and they held the look. White and cloudy as Hyuga must be._

_"It's not" the cousin answered stubbornly, his fingers tapping Neji's hip in a steady rhythm. "No one is going to know about it, they think we're best-friends, so it's not wrong" he whispered as if it was a secret jutsu._

_Neji sighed "Just because people don't know doesn't make it right either."_

_Tokuma rolled his eyes and his lips draw a thin line "Do you want me to leave? To pretend I don't want you as we've been doing for months?"_

_The other didn't answer._

_Obviously Neji didn't want his cousin to leave, not now that they had confessed and went all the way, it was just hard to understand how it was going to work, how they would pretend it was just friendship, how they would hide it from the others?_

_When Tokuma made to brace himself and stand up Neji held him firmly by the wrist, stopping the man in a sitting position._

_"Don't" Neji whispered, feeling pain as he moved, kneeling on the futon and straddling his cousin, one knee on each side "Why is this happening?" he asked low, his long mane fusing with the other's as their chests locked together, knuckles caressing his cousin's strong jaw and Tokuma's fingertips fondling the small of his back temptingly._

_"Because it was meant to happen..." Tokuma muttered against his lips, sharing the same air "Because we were fated to love each other..." their lips brushed in a sensual motion and both teenagers shivered with the contact "Because the red string of fate bound us together..." their tongues touched tenderly, rolling as if they were dancing._

_For two teenagers it was such a great excuse. Because when you're sixteen or seventeen life looks much bigger and obvious than it really is. And they preferred to accept the stupid simple reason they had in hands._

_Akai ito._

_Neji lowered his body to sit at Tokuma's lap, making them tremble lustfully with the touch of their hips, hard flesh pressing, throbbing._

_"Akai ito, Neji..." Tokuma echoed sexily rolling their groins together with no mercy._

...

The memories were blurry because of the time, it was so long ago he couldn't recall the year, but it was the first time and it still made him shiver and breathe shakily. It was the first time someone said he was bonded by the red string of fate.

The recollections were spinning inside his head and he felt dizzy, holding onto the back of the chair just to make sure he wouldn't fall. Shikaku's words were echoing gingerly in his mind and Neji didn't feel Shikamaru's hand touching his shoulders gently because a torrent of memories ran inside his mental screen at the same time.

…

_He was sitting on a chair in the kitchen, the tea was cold and so was the night, he felt empty and bizarre, Neji didn't understand how they had let it get to this point._

_Running ghost-pale hands over his face he tried to hold in and hold back all the bad feelings inside his chest._

_It wasn't working anymore, they couldn't keep it like this, it was tearing them apart._

_His green yukata was half open and the pale bare body under it was uneasy, scared and anxious. They shouted at each other and said a lot of things they knew they shouldn't, and now it was just going to make it harder._

_Their identical cage seals hovering over their lives, their friendship and relationship shattering because they couldn't keep it together, it was breaking and they couldn't do anything anymore._

_The wind entered the kitchen and he moved on the chair, feeling bad with all the wrong word-choices. They ended up punching and jabbing each other and then kissing and biting, having rough sex without feelings or love, just carnal desire..._

_It wasn't right, not for them. It was a fucking relationship, a long-term one!_

_"Tokuma..." his voice sounded broken in the empty room, his eyes glancing through living-room and hallway._

_He was still asleep, but Neji couldn't close his eyes and relax even for a minute._

_He had expected it to last forever, even if he hadn't thought about it before. Neji wasn't good talking about feelings, but he was ok feeling them and what he felt from the very beginning was that they were going to do it right._

_But now, he wasn't sure they were still fated to be together._

_Not anymore._

_The slight movement in the other side of the house drew his attention and his opal eyes narrowed in on Tokuma's bare frame, standing in the corridor, as pale as a ghost and the bruises haunted Neji._

_He looked away._

_"Neji?" his hoarse sleepy voice sounded pained "Come back to bed" he asked "You need to rest."_

_He needed, he had a mission first thing in the morning, but he couldn't fall asleep, he had tried for hours._

_"Are you ok, Nej?" his cousin asked walking to the kitchen and stopping at the door, a protuberant hipbone braced on the doorframe._

_His nakedness was making Neji uncomfortable; the marks making him feel guilty. Everything screamed of their poor relationship, or rather the ruins of it._

_"It's not working anymore, Toku..." he muttered gingerly._

_"We will figure it out" he said killing the distance and touching Neji's loosened hair, fingering the green mark more tenderly than anyone else could do._

_Their eyes met. Tokuma didn't want to give up but Neji knew they couldn't keep that up._

_"I don't want to lose you" he said bitter._

_"You're not losing me" Tokuma took his chin between his finger and lifted his beautiful face._

_"You know this can't be figured out."_

_"Stop it, Neji. We can make it-"_

_"We can't..." Neji whispered sadly._

_"Do you want to break up?"_

_Tokuma lowered his hand. Their identical eyes holding the deadlock; a sad and ginger deadlock. So Neji licked his lips and looked away, making the other man whir unhappy, a strange pain taking a grip on Neji's heart._

_"Answer me, dammit!" he snapped, hands fingering his own tangled hair._

_Neji looked inside his moonstone eyes, their chests crashing inside out, the true hovering above them._

_"I don't know."_

x

"Neji, are you ok?" Shikamaru called out and the Hyuga breathed heavily.

Back from his past. Back to the present.

Shikamaru was looking at him concerned. Neji was very pale and his hands were shaking, Hiashi was watching him with a raised brow as if asking what the hell was happening.

"I'm fine" he said, feeling Shikamaru holding him by the shoulders.

He felt bad, but couldn't do anything. The Godaime was observing his slow motions and he looked away.

"Don't worry, Neji" Shikaku said, his voice sounding worried as he narrowed his midnight black eyes "I said I don't know because it never happened like this before" he explained, snorting short after "I mean, I can break the shadow bond, but I'm not sure if doing that the chakra bond will break all at the same time."

"I can help" Hiashi volunteered, his opal eyes still fixed on his nephew's frame "I'll be your eyes, Shikaku."

The Nara hummed and stood up.

"Let's do it then" he said "I need you to look at each other, just a step away no more than that."

Neji turned to Shikamaru and their eyes met.

Tsunade watched everything carefully and Hiashi activated his Byakugan.

"Spread your shadows, Shikamaru, surround him" his father demanded and he did it with a hand seal.

Onyx eyes diving into cotton white clouds.

Neji felt the air around him get thicker, like a stiff smoke surrounding him. But it was tender and delicate; he could see it inside the midnight eyes staring at him. Strong vibes taking care of him like an immense and warm cloud.

_Like an embrace. _

It tore at him and the sadness in his eyes sparkled for a second before he could retreat it. The shadow nin got a hint of it, frowning. Shikamaru could feel it, the strong hold of his shadows around the Hyuga frame, and it was the most tender thing he felt in a long time.

_Please make it stop._

Neji was feeling naked. He could feel the strong power of Shikamaru's shadows all over him, and he could still feel his anxiousness...it wasn't his, he wasn't anxious, he was afraid. He didn't know if the feelings would go away with the bond or not.

He had no idea what to expect.

_I can't like you._

Shikamaru's eyes ran over his face, making sure he wasn't feeling pain, at least not physical pain. His gaze stopped in the Hyuga's lips and for a small second he needed to think clearly and hold back the urge to kiss those lips until they were bruised and swollen.

He couldn't deny the desire. He couldn't deny he was going to miss Neji's presence. The talks, the politeness, the intelligence...inside his head a film rolled on, flashing images of them both and their days together, and it felt pained.

It was stupid and girly but he didn't know how he was going to get to sleep tonight, in his big empty bed, knowing Neji would be somewhere else without him.

_Don't make it harder!_

Shikamaru knew how to control it; he just needed to stop thinking. He would sleep the whole night, he needed it. He tried to hold onto the idea of needing that rest; maybe the loneliness was going to make it easier, no one would piss him off or bother him.

_Just me and my shadows._

"I'll start" Shikaku announced, cutting through his troublesome thoughts.

Neji swallowed thickly and Shikamaru watched the motion mesmerized.

Both young men held their breaths when a strong and heavy chakra submerged them. It was brutal energy, it made Neji think about how bad it must be to fight Nara Shikaku.

"What do you see, Hyuga?"

"Your chakra is merging with theirs."

"And now?"

_It's starting._

Shikamaru gasped at the feeling, something cold snaking inside his body, making him shiver but he didn't stop looking at Neji. Those moonlight eyes made him remember the night before, and he couldn't stop the stream of words that were rolling inside his mind.

Even if Neji was drunk...even if it was just the bond...

_Could you really love me?_

"Shikamaru's chakra is backing off" he described "It's undoing the chakra fusion."

_I'm backing off Neji...what about you?_

Then Neji hissed and sighed in pain, his façade kept as stoic as ever trying to hold back all the feelings and the emotions and the pain of the chakra unlocking its knots inside each chakra point.

_Are you holding on? _

Shikamaru was looking for answers in shades of white and lilac, he needed to know if all that was said the night before was going to back off, if it would extinguish just like the bonfire, if they would stop feeling everything, if Neji would take back his words and let it be just a tipsy confession.

_Was it the liquor and the bond or was it _you_?_

"It's undoing the knots in Neji's chakra too, Shikaku."

"Now, boys let your chakras ease, I need it to be as thin you can get. Stop the flux if possible."

Neji did it, Shikamaru couldn't so he just made it as calm as possible, almost undetectable.

Shikamaru's shadows retreated from Neji's body, withdrawing the embrace until it faded and the Hyuga felt somewhat empty, as if he was alone again. The pain started growing inside his chest at the same time he stopped feeling Shikamaru under his skin.

_Why did you choose me?_

The question got Neji's knees trembling imperceptibly.

Their gazes were still connected and they held onto it, not letting go as a strange sensation reached their chakra-bodies, strangling and draining them. Neji felt a pinch on his pinkie finger and so did Shikamaru, both moving their fingers at the same time and staring at it.

"Did you...?" Neji whispered.

Shikamaru nodded, his voice low and his black eyes piercing Neji's white ones "I felt."

The Hyuga closed his eyes, feeling a cold flame lick inside him, undoing everything that was still bonding them together. It was hard to not pull back, the deadlock inside his mind fighting through the pain. He could fight it and stop the process, but he knew it was wrong.

He didn't want to let it go though.

_Why us?_

He watched Shikamaru from under his lashes and in the last minute tried to memorize all his features, the small details, olive shades and sharp contours. In one last minute and maybe after that everything was going to vanish, just like a dream.

_Did I choose you back?_

Emptiness surrounded him. Terrifying and cold.

"The bond is broken" Hiashi said in his deep voice.

None of them moved, their eyes connected and the empty feeling creeping the hell out of them. It was cold, viscous and heart aching.

_Did I Shikamaru?_

"Are you two ok?" the Hokage asked.

Both nodded, but they were still holding the small strings that still linked them: the thick air they were sharing, the warm between their bodies, the possibility of everything going wrong.

"Can you move?" Shikaku asked.

Neji was the first one to turn to look at the Hokage. Shikamaru resisted for a heartbeat, the loneliness daggering his guts and chest, making it ache unexpectedly. He shook his head, gazing at his father and the others.

"Are you ok?" Shikaku asked his son directly "Do you still feel him?"

_Yes._

"Thank god, no" he sounded a bit happy but the emptiness was crushing inside his chest like a storm hitting the whole city. He stretched lazily and smirked at his dad, knowing that just like this he would make the man stop worrying about him. "Give me a break, old man".

Tsunade sighed.

"Great" she said "You're back to work tomorrow, Shikamaru, tons of paperwork will be waiting for you" she grinned at him and his smile died as soon as he heard it.

"Troublesome" he cursed.

"Tsunade-sama, they can be paired in missions in two weeks, just to make sure it's not pulling back. We should watch how they work together in further missions; maybe the jutsu was trying to make a point about it." Shikaku suggested.

"Good. Neji, I'll contact you as soon as a mission appears" she said, watching his stoic face under her lashes "If it's all over, you are dismissed."

x

Each step out of that room was making them more anxious than ever. It was a kind of fever, it was boiling under their skin, throbbing in their veins.

_Please..._

Shikamaru felt the air thick and damp going down his throat as they kept walking. The silence in their footstep was so loud it was making him want to skip this part and be in his own room, as lonely as one could be.

But it wasn't possible.

He had always hated farewells.

_It's not a goddamned farewell!_

He breathed heavily shaking his head.

_It's not even a goodbye._

They would keep being comrades, in the same village and for sure in some missions since Shikaku said so. It was going to be as normal as ever.

_It's going to be ok._

He echoed it at least seven times in half a minute. Like a mantra, like something that needed to be overcome just like that. Stupid simple.

It was nothing like what he was feeling. What he was feeling was so damned troublesome he had no idea how to describe.

Sore and sharp. Like a razor.

Like the feeling creeping under his ribcage. Hurting all over it.

He couldn't see Neji's narrowed eyes staring at his back, but he could feel it, just like a sixth sense.

Shikaku put a hand on his shoulder and pressed lightly, reassuring his son with the firm touch of his fingers.

_It's going to be ok..._

But Neji wasn't so confident. His cotton like eyes were glaring at Shikamaru's nape as fiercely as he could, like he was trying to touch the olive skin with the power of his will.

_Telekinesis._

For a single second he desired to touch him again or at least feel something inside his body, a small static of chakra fusion, the slightest sensation of shadows. Shikamaru's shadows.

But it was empty inside out. Drained.

To miss the sensation of Shikamaru under his skin was something so wrong he wanted to punch himself. He could sense Hiashi's pale eyes on him, concerned and doubtful.

Neji wasn't prepared for it, he could have been waiting for any reaction, but not _this_.

That morning, when he let desire and irrationality decide for him in a wrong heartbeat, when he craved for Shikamaru, when his hands drew patterns on that olive skin and their bodies collided against each other...it was a goodbye.

_No need for this!_

Neji looked down, trying his best to stop the fall of images; the sensations, the smell, the touch...

_Dammit!_

But he couldn't stop it.

The warm skin under his fingertips, the faint moans and the heavy breaths. The scent of Shikamaru's hair, the salty taste of his neck all over his tongue.

Like venom in his blood. Like a potion. Like a spell.

_Stop it!_

He breathed shakily, staring at the chunin's nape, feeling the hairs there getting static with the simple idea of being touched. His chest twisted painfully and he felt like a chain linking them. It would stretch and twist but it wouldn't break.

Just like _Akai Ito_.

_"As if we needed more cages…" _

Tokuma's words popped up in his mind like a ghost, to haunt him, to make him think that this sensation of being bonded to Shikamaru was just one more trouble. Another cage.

_"Thank god, no."_

The Nara's voice made him snort. Shikamaru was relieved of being apart, he should be as well.

Neji was going to start doing it right away.

To reassure himself that it was gone for good the Hyuga genius clutched to the fact that Shikamaru was feeling nothing, the strange rage it awakened was strong enough to counterattack the will of not letting go.

_Enough._

And so he did it.

He let it go.

"Lets finish this already" he said firmly, his cool expression not revealing the conflict inside his mind and chest.

Hiashi smirked proudly and tapped his nephew shoulder.

They brushed past the Naras and exited the tower without saluting, their gracious moves making Shikamaru think about two skittish cats.

Confusion invaded the young Nara man and he shook his head watching them wearily.

"What is he doing?" his voice sounded bitter.

"Speeding up the process" Shikaku answered lazily watching his son out the corner of his eye.

Disbelief coiled inside the young chuunin, was Neji walking away?

_The goddamn bastard!_

Shikamaru was so relieved to feel nothing; a small sensation that everything was going to be back in track comforting the strange emptiness inside his chest. And now the great Hyuga genius was just leaving.

_Leaving me._

The words in his mind made him clench his hands and his jaw got tense. Neji disappeared through the front door with Hiashi and he sped up his steps leaving his father behind, but when he reached the big door Neji was much further than seventeen steps away.

And he didn't even look back.

_You let it go, didn't you?_

Like senbons the realization nailed inside him while their shapes were getting far from each other. The white robes shining like a fucking cotton cloud in the horizon, disappearing in the crowd.

Shikamaru took a shaky breath and blinked twice, losing Neji's frame in the mass of Konoha citizen.

_It's going to be ok._

He turned left. Opposite direction. And started walking. He never got to see the Hyuga shinobi looking back, from the middle of the multitude. Nor the pain in his moonstone eyes.

x

It hurt and pierced. A hundred senbons attacking his already pained heart.

He was breathing deep, holding back the pain ignoring the will to cry his feelings out. It wasn't right, he shouldn't be sad or terrified by the _normal_sensation of being alone. But he couldn't stop it.

It felt like a storm tearing him from inside out and the stupid cold was making it harder to suppress. His uncle congratulated him and arranged a training session for the morning which he thanked very much for, like this he could maintain his stupid mind focused in something more important.

Like sparring.

The compound pathways were almost empty, the sun was almost merging in the horizon and the cold was becoming very annoying, but it fit with the sad feelings, like a troublesome old story.

Old story.

_Akai Ito._

_Dammit!_

He sped up his footsteps and snorted impatient. The confusion was crawling under his skin, making him wonder if it was going to leave anytime soon. Neji wouldn't like to deal with it for too long.

First because he didn't want to feel it. Second because it was pissing him of. Third because it hurt so damn much to feel the emptiness inside his chest that he wanted to open it up and turn the involuntary muscle off.

Rip it out. Like a ripper.

It was gnawing. It was very long time ago the last time he cried, but he could perfectly cry right now. Because the damned sensation was bringing a tsunami of memories about how empty and lonely his life could be.

_Just like the last ten months. _

It was creepy, he could feel it under his nails like blood dripping unpleasantly and the excruciating pain. Throbbing in his heart the sharp pain called loneliness.

The worst part in all that fucking bond was the taste of fullness that not being alone brought into him again.

He was ok alone.

_Until he arrived in my life._

He stopped in front of his house, remembering the Nara's expression when he first came here. His fingers reverted into a fist and he bit on his bottom lip. The bitter taste of longing and missing pooling in his throat like a knot. Hard to push away, impossible to stop feeling.

The knot slipped through his ginger throat and settled inside his heart, like lava burning him painfully inside out.

He gasped but contained the stream of bitter tears from falling.

_Shit!_

Neji could feel his fingers trembling, the muscles of his arms too and the headache starting to arise because of the tears he was fighting back. He opened the door, the homelike smell making it harder.

Because the stupid smell now reminded him of Shikamaru, in fact the whole freaking house would have the same effect on him. He breathed thickly, feeling his lungs ache and alleviate, but his heart wouldn't stop throbbing any less.

He closed the door, the house haunting him like a thousand ghosts. But then he felt it, his eyes widened and he stared pissed at the person.

"What are you doing here?"

He intended to sound mad and inhospitable but his voice went out cracked and pained.

"Thought you could use some companionship" the man answered shrugging.

"How can you fucking read me like this?" Neji asked weakly, sounding sharp but hurt.

His expression showed how bad he was feeling, how hurt and lonely; his throat was hurting so bad he didn't want to hold it back anymore, he wanted to let the stream of tears fall as it needed so much to do.

"Why...Tokuma?"

Sadness shattered his chest.

Before the first teardrop could fall from his lashes, Tokuma's arms were around him holding in his hands what Neji couldn't handle it anymore.

His heart...

"Because I love you."

* * *

><p><strong>AN:** Told yah already, Tokuma keeps appearing in all the wrong moments u.u .

**My lovelies, you are SO fantastic!** I think that for a ficwriter the whole support and feedback are be best earnings one can have. Every time I see a new review I feel butterflies in my belly and I get a bit nervous, and you always surprise me with funny and warm comments. That's just great, I'm so glad I got to know you through this fanfiction. **:3 so, please, feel hugged and licked and cuddled.** THANK YOU!

**We are reaching the grand finale,** 2 more chapters and... **OH MY GOD!** I'm not ready to "let it go" (as one beautiful Rayne would point it out), it's being such a nice ride, I'm learning a lot with this fic and enjoying even more...but life goes on...

Now, just to end this A/N with** good news: **Kuroda Miharu made an AMAZING **fanart of the bonfire** scene at chapter 11. Here is the link, let's fave and review: kurodamiharu . deviantart #/d5ixlrw

Ok, hope you liked it, let me know what do you feel with the broken bond, the sadness and Tokuma. :3  
>Loads of love and ShikaNejiShika for you, Sweethearts!<p>

Tai xxx


	14. Tie Your Heart at Night to Mine

_Well, this one is the biggest chapter till now (if I'm not wrong), I hope you enjoy it! ;) _

**Beta: Kuroda Miharu**

* * *

><p><strong>When Shadows Surround You<strong>

**Chapter 14**

_Tie your heart at night to mine_

* * *

><p>The lights were turned on and he could see through the glass. The view made Shikamaru close his eyelid. He didn't want to deal with that, not right now.<p>

Yoshino was cooking dinner and she looked very calm. He saw her sweet brown eyes narrowing on him and she smiled.

_Damn..._

He _really_didn't want to deal with it.

He followed Shikaku in and smelled the food, but the hunger didn't appear as it usually did.

"Shikamaru" she called his name in an acute tone that she used when he was a kid, and that meant she was worried about him.

He walked into the kitchen and stopped cocking a hip against the doorframe. He looked at the dark brown hair, falling over her right shoulder, some grey hair shining in the soft light. She was getting old. Maybe so was he.

"Is it over?" she asked, a bowl of freshly made rice in hands.

The mother watched him nod looking above her shoulder and through the window. She noticed the wrinkle between his brows and the arms folded in front of his chest as if he was trying to protect it.

He looked sad. Cold like the winter.

"Good" she muttered, picking some hashi up and giving the bowl to him "Eat, you must be hungry."

"I'm not."

Yoshino stared at the white rice and nodded. She should have expected that, not only the wrinkle but the lack of appetite and the cold approach.

He sighed, glancing at the path in front of the house and feeling strangely empty. She poked his arm and watched his black eyes turn to her, getting his attention she smiled again sadly, as if she could feel it with him.

"Take it to your room. You may feel hungry later" she added before he could say something.

He just smiled weakly and went to his room.

He got into the bedroom and closed the door behind him, leaning on it. Shikamaru gasped with the strangled pain inside him.

_Damn you, Hyuga!_

He put the bowl on the table beside the door and his hand flew to his face, covering his eyes, his thumbs brushing temples in a vain attempt to make the headache go away. He pressed harder and felt it ache even more.

"Dammit!"

Panting with rage he kicked off his sandals and scrambled on to the bed.

He shouldn't have.

Neji's scent was all over it, he could almost feel the touch of silky hair under his fingertips. He punched the pillow, nails scratched the fabric, fingers daggering over it stricken. The adrenaline was rushing through him as he fought against the memories, images and emotions.

Like a ghost of Neji.

He gritted his teeth then biting the pillow trying to hurt it, to make it stop, to delete the sensation creeping inside of him like a snake. But the scent just increased, his nose pressed against the cool pillowcase, and then Neji was everywhere.

Neji was in his room. He was lying on the bed. He was under his body. He was above him and inside...

The musky scent of men and sex was ingrained in the sheet and blankets, haunting him, popping images up his mind.

_"Because I could perfectly love you!" _

He punched the mattress once again, hugging the pillow and breathing into the scent of Neji's body.

Love was a pretty strong word, it was much more intense than any other feeling. It was real and completely troublesome. He didn't want to love anyone nor to be loved. Or so he thought. But after the Hyuga's words...

_How did he read me so damn well?_

Shikamaru tried his best to never figure out his problems with love. It wasn't just Kurenai, it was his whole existence. He didn't save Asuma, he couldn't, he didn't save Sasuke nor Ino even if he didn't know what exactly happened to her.

He was a genius and even though he couldn't save everybody he wanted and needed.

He didn't have ambitions and he didn't bother about it. Shikamaru was good for no one, how could he expect to be loved?

"Bullshit...all bullshit!"

He wanted so badly to be loved, to feel the troublesome taste of it, to live with the great bother of taking care of someone and being taken care of. Shikamaru just didn't understand how to deal with that and now the stupid stick-up-his-ass-Hyuga destroyed the safety of his lies and touched where he shouldn't.

He had stabbed the scarred wound and now it was bleeding.

Shikamaru inhaled the scent and shut his eyes closed. Closing his mind from the present and feeling the past brush all over him, skimming against his body like a lover.

_"Do you feel it?"_

Neji's husky voice sounded from the back of his head. Back in that moment, in the bar drowned by the rage of discovering more about the bond he felt nothing, just anger boiling inside him, and arousal. But now he couldn't deny it.

"I feel it" he muttered against the pillow, scraping it with his fangs.

He could feel the heat of Neji's mouth, the thick breath against his lips, the tongue brushing past the barrier of his lips and inviting him to a dangerous burning roll, their hips locking together.

_"Let me manipulate you." _

"Oh bastard!" he said through gritted teeth, the pillow muffling the sound.

The floss of memories were making him hard and pissed at the same time. But he couldn't shut it down, he couldn't turn it off. He needed those memories so badly even if it hurt so damn much; it felt raw, bitter and real, he could almost touch it with his fingertips.

"C'mon, manipulate me" he muttered, hatred heating inside him, making him rub strongly against the mattress "Manhandle me, Hyuga, piss me off!"

He pounded against the blankets, pleasure pooling in the small of his back, like oil on fire, like rage building up as fast as it was possible to handle. He should be pissed, he should be in pain but no, the bare smell of Neji was disturbing his senses in the wrong way, pushing him onto the edge.

_"You shouldn't have released me..." _

"I shouldn't have let you know me that much" he answered the voice in his mind, a hand coming down and entering inside his pants, touching his leaking arousal and panting "Release me, Neji, just like I released you...go away" he sighed and bit his bottom lip, he could see Neji's firm a muscular body in front of him, barely touching, making him crave for it so badly "Fuck..." he hissed.

_"I feel you, Shikamaru...you're under my skin..."_

He sighed heavily, the breath shaking through his parted lips, his head spinning around those memories and the soft burning touch it started all over his body made him want more.

"Me too, Neji...even now, I still feel you" he murmured, lips brushing the pillowcase, the smell of sweat, men, Neji's scent and musky was driving him to the very edge; it wasn't supposed to be happening but he couldn't stop such a heat "Please...don't fade away..." he whispered in despair.

With a last faint pant the reached the bliss, Neji's eyes in his mind burning him like a firemoon.

"Don't fade away..." he repeated gripping on the sheets despearated.

Shikamaru slowly opened his eyes, looking through the window and seeing the moon hovering in the sky. The emptiness attacked him like a cannonball against his chest. His lips trembled and his eyes stung with tears that wouldn't fall.

The ghost sensation of having Neji there started to fade away and he closed his eyes terrified.

x

His mouth tasted bitter, like sadness and bad sake, though he didn't drink any.

His chest was feeling stormy and heavy, the bad sensation wouldn't go away. Neji tried his best to rest, to sleep the pain away, but even with his eyelids shut and his eyes closed to the world he couldn't fall asleep.

Neji felt the cold wind brush his body and he watched the empty backyard. His cup of tea warming his hands and the steam drew cloudy patterns in the air, heading his thoughts to the shadow-nin once again.

He couldn't stop it. It was stronger than him.

"Shikamaru" the syllables rolled between his lips and the tip of his tongue, he could almost taste the flavour of the Nara in his mouth.

After Tokuma's welcome they sat in the couch and stayed quiet for a long hour. His cousin prepared tea and told him he was not leaving until Neji was completely ok.

He wasn't completely ok, so Tokuma was sleeping soundly in his bed right now.

At the first moment, his chest ached badly with Tokuma's words. That scared the hell out of him. "_Because I love you_". Neji didn't need any more trouble right now, he just wanted space and time; so when the words were said his heart pounded hard.

It was already hard to deal with the pain of a stupid bond-break that shouldn't be aching that much, it would be much worse if Tokuma really meant those words, but after a heartbeat it was over and the warm sensation of the embrace made him calm down.

_"You're my best friend, Nej...I won't leave you alone right now."_

Tokuma whispered against his hair, the words brushing the long dark tresses like a caress. He felt sheltered and spent long hours with his own thoughts trying to understand what the fuck was happening to him.

Of course he liked Shikamaru. He didn't know how it started, but somehow it had and now he was feeling empty and stupid all at the same time.

The lazy bastard even smiled happily saying thank god he didn't feel Neji anymore, that felt like a poisoned senbon...a stupid small senbon that was very hard to stop feeling.

He watched the moon trying to hide behind the clouds and smiled weak.

Neji would need all the strength he had to put it all back and hold it inside his heart.

"Make the feelings disappear" he whispered to the wind.

Just like Houdini. But disappearing feelings, fading them, was a pretty difficult task. So he sucked a deep breath, took a sip of his green tea and walked back inside his house, he needed to clean it all and make Shikamaru's presence and scent disappear. After that he would deal with the rest.

While Neji cleaned his house he tried his best to empty his mind, as if it was the same cleanup process.

And maybe it was.

x

The week took much longer to end than normally would. Shikamaru tried his best to focus on his work even if it was boring; he wouldn't leave the Hokage's Tower from early morning to late at night. He thought it was the best plan he had to avoid dealing with his mother's concerned looks or his father's knowing glances.

He needed space, he needed time alone or at least in silence. And working - even it was really troublesome - was the only escape that provided it to him.

Shikamaru met Ino and Chouji for lunch almost everyday, it was the only moment he would talk about things not related to work.

Ino looked much better. She got a month off and it made both her friends felt uneasy; it was a big deal. Her smile was there again, though it was still empty and her fingers would shake once in awhile – even though she trying her best to hide it or control chakra through her hands and stop the tremors. During the first several days it was still difficult for her to look at them naturally, but slowly she started feeling comfortable again.

The blond told them she was doing a psychological accompaniment and that it was great, she could already feel the difference. She also told her friends that her mom was being very attentive and caring and that it made her very happy.

Those moments during lunch were the ones when Shikamaru was able to worry about Ino and Chouji alone and nothing else. He would be there to them and listen to every word they pronounced, so when Ino told them she was getting along with Genma and that he was helping her a lot the deer-nin couldn't prevent a grin.

The senbon bastard was getting his way into her panties, or at least he was doing his best effort to. Shikamaru knew Genma felt somewhat guilty, and that helping her was helping him soothe it all at the same time. They were training and sparring together, she even started learning how to use senbons, she blushed like a child when Sai joined their lunch the other day and commented he found female senbon-fighters really sexy.

But, one night Shikamaru saw Ino and Sakura at the bar when he was heading home, and it made him think if his blond teammate was really getting over it. The pink-haired young lady was worried about the Yamanaka and they were drinking their sake at the bar without speaking, not even a word. Their shoulders were touching slightly, sharing body-warmth to bare the chilly autumn as if it was the only thing that could smooth the pain, the cold, the fears and everything else. Haruno had sad eyes and the way she looked at her best friend was heartbreaking.

He knew that at some point Ino would talk to the three of them, tell the trueth and keep strong, but maybe it was not the moment yet.

He could understand why the med-nin was concerned, Ino having psy-nin treatment was something big and maybe it made her remember when Sasuke was back and torn. Shikamaru could see that in the way she waited patiently in silence, their warm-sake sliding down their throats, she was doing the same strategy she did with Sasuke: wait for the right moment, try to comfort with her best and respect the other's sorrow.

It made Shikamaru think that Sakura had changed a lot. He didn't know her very well, he just knew the pink-haired kunoichi was living with Sasuke and Naruto at the Uchiha compound and that she was much more silent and wiser than when she was a silly fangirl.

It made him think that maybe he wasn't the only one having trouble to sleep, that maybe none of them were in their best of moments.

He was thinking about it when he saw a skinny girl entering in the office he was using to work, she didn't knock at the door, but she was weirdly quiet and just closed it behind her thin body, leaning on the door timidly.

"Hanabi, are you alright?" his voice sounded smooth and she nodded, not looking like the little minx Hanabi he had met back in Hiashi's house.

"I was thinking about trying to seduce you and passed by. Do I bother you?" she grinned at him and he smiled back.

"Not at all" Shikamaru crossed his arms against his chest and thought that she would do a very nice chat-mate right now, he really needed a break from all those reports, it was late already and he didn't have the brain for more mission strategies. "How do you plan seducing me?" he asked as she walked to him.

"In fact, I was thinking about using my intellect and perception" she said and rounded the table to lean against the wood in front of him.

"Sounds good to me" he answered looking inside round light-lilac eyes.

Those eyes made him feel homesick. Terribly homesick. Neji-sick.

_Dammit. It's been ten days already..._

Suddenly her eyes became severe and serious and she crossed her arms - in a very good imitation of _him_.

"He's not ok, Shika-kun" she muttered "And you're not either."

His breath got caught in the back of his throat. He wasn't ok, he couldn't even sleep properly, think straight or keep Neji from his mind. He was tired, he was lonely, he was bitter and anxious, extremely anxious.

"What happened?" he asked, his voice still soft though his heart was beating fast and pounding against his ribcage with the slight idea of 'bad' and 'Neji' at the same time.

"His focus is lacking and I can say by your panda eyes you're not sleeping well."

"And you said you were trying to seduce me..." he sighed. He should'a known.

"You're not worried about him?" she stared at him, something in her tone made his blood cool and almost freeze.

"What happened to Neji?" he repeated the question a bit tense as she watched him with a stoic façade. Typical Hyuga, now he saw who the real Hanabi was, the deadly serious heir of the Clan.

"_You_ happened."

Her voice was so low it sounded like a whisper. It went right into his heart, racing it, stabbing in it. The blood rushed fast in his veins and he felt dizzy looking at her moon-like eyes. Hyuga eyes. Neji's eyes.

The young girl sighed and stepped aside, walking around the table and staying away from him. She looked quiet and almost unhappy.

"He was wounded. I thought you would like to know" she said with a light breath "It's not a big deal. But I was wondering that maybe this whole tantric-bond-thing of yours was a bit more than just tantric sex...and if I'm right about it you should pass by the compound after work, he could use a hand."

She crocked a brow and grinned again.

"In many different ways" and with the hint of perversion in her words she left.

Shikamaru felt sick. Shivers rushing over his body like waves.

Shit, he was definitely Neji-sick.

x

He went home when his brain-cells denied working. In fact they hadn't been working for a long time when he had headed home; Shikamaru wasn't working, he was thinking about Neji.

For hours.

But not even the hot bath and the warm blankets were enough to shut down the curiosity, the need and the despair. He wanted so much to go after Neji, to make sure he was ok, to feel his warm body against his.

_Stop it!_

He shouted mentally at his thoughts, trying to shoot them down. But for some stupid reason his body was not willing to rest again, not even in that ungodly hour. It was 2:34 A.M., he checked twice before the minute change and blinked tiredly.

Shikamaru sat on his bed and looked around, there was nothing he could do and the sleep seemed to be hours away. So he put his chuunin uniform back on and reached for his mission-pack.

He stopped thinking and just sighed as he jumped though the window.

The last ten days were terrible. He couldn't sleep and his will to keeping Neji anywhere but in his mind was not strong enough. When it comes to his mind, he was never good at controlling it.

Shikamaru climbed on the roof and used his chakra to run through the village imperceptibly. He couldn't deny it anymore, he needed at least to see if Neji was really ok, to make sure nothing shocking was going to surprise him tomorrow first thing in the morning.

The shadow-nin closed his eyes for a second and the small hope of sneaking into Neji's bed and just rest was so appealing he needed to bite his inner cheek to maintain his balance. In fact, it was completely crazy, he should just head back home and try to get some sleep but his body was not agreeing with his brain or rationality.

He needed it. The Nara wanted to see the long haired man for half a second, it would be enough so he could go back to Nara clan and sleep tight. But it was a lie, a huge and stupid lie.

During the last few days he had been hiding from Neji every single time he felt the Hyuga's chakra in the Hokage Tower; the last four days were silent and painful because he knew he wouldn't get that great chakra presence near him as the jounin was in a mission outside Konoha.

He had sent Neji on the mission. He regretted it from the minute the older man stepped out of the village gates.

Shikamaru was a mess.

When he arrived at the Hyuga compound he remembered he had no idea what to say to the clan guards, but as soon as one of them noticed him he just smiled and commented that Hanabi had already told them he would pass by to check on Neji.

He felt stupid. Hanabi was a smartass, annoying brat...

The man felt his heart throbbing painfully inside the ribcage and held his breath just for a moment, trying to contain the strong movement of his chest and the fast beats.

What should he do? He wasn't supposed to be there, nor be close to the other ninja.

His feet lead him to Neji's window and the Nara watched through the curtains how the shadows moved inside the room. He moved closer, seeing not just Neji's bare upper body tangled in the blankets, but the blood-stained towel next to the futon and the Chibi-Ball cat patrolling with its shiny eyes from the corner near the door.

The Hyuga was sleeping soundly. It was a beautiful view, it warmed Shikamaru's heart and he felt more alive. The fast spinning in his head slowed down like it was under a spell and the young man leaned his forehead against the cold glass, watching his former bond-mate sleep calmly.

So he did the last thing he shouldn't have: his hands formed a seal and his shadows entered the dark room.

Shadow hands delineated Neji's frame, black fingers tugged slightly at the blankets, moving it to a better position upon his body. Shikamaru could feel it under his real fingertips while he watched his shadows caressing and brushing over that pale skin, burning his senses, killing his neurons.

He raised the glass-window silently as soon as his jutsu touched a big wound in the left side of Neji's rib. Shikamaru sat on the windowsill, waiting for his shadows to finish checking on the Hyuga. He discovered bruises, scratches and small cuts, but the wound in his ribs was deep and it was still bleeding, and it was making the Gentle Fist ninja feverish.

The deer-nin noticed the sweat sparkling over the Hyuga's face and in his forehead.

He froze. There was no hitai-ate or bandages covering the seal mark, it was there unprotected, light-green tattooed in pale skin.

Shikamaru saw the cat staring at him, but after a second the animal escaped through the ajar door and he made a move, the shadow hands caressing the skin he wanted so much to touch. The ghost fingers drew the green mark and ran over the beautiful face, thumbs cherishing those light pink lips, making desire coil inside the shadow manipulator, his heart almost skipped a beat when the long haired man lying there turned troubled in bed.

He stepped in closing the window behind him.

"You shouldn't be here" the hoarse voice sounded pained and black eyes narrowed the slender figure staring at him with white-lilac eyes.

Moonstones.

Shikamaru held his breath and his bottom lip shook with the strength in those eyes.

"You're wounded" he muttered and Neji blinked stoically.

"We shouldn't see each other for two weeks".

"And you're still wounded".

Neji rolled his eyes impatiently.

"It's not a big deal" he whispered breathing uncomfortably "I pressed som-"

"You're bleeding, Neji" Shikamaru cut him off and took his mission-pack in hands, looking for some of his mother's medicines.

"Leave".

The Nara stopped the motion but didn't look up to meet the moon-like eyes. He didn't want to see there the same request he just heard. He breathed heavily and kept looking for what he needed.

He knelt down beside the futon, Neji's scent making him breathe uneven. Shikamaru could feel his fingers trembling like Ino's, but he pretended it was nothing and took the blankets in his hands pulling it away from the wounded skin.

"Nara" the deep tone made Shikamaru feel bad.

"I'm not leaving" he said looking at Neji.

The gaze made both shiver and they were so close it felt right. It was the most beautiful thing in the world. It was warm and homelike. The Hyuga's lip parted but he said nothing, he just watched the midnight eyes and the face he'd got used to in the last weeks.

He was tired. He was pained. He was terrified by the closeness. He almost couldn't breathe.

Shikamaru's fingers brushed past his skin and he contained a tremor. The last ten days were an absolute loss. The Hyuga couldn't remember a moment he spent without thinking about Shikamaru or anything related to the young chunin. Even during the sparring moments with his cousins or during the mission, he couldn't focus as normal, Neji was still troubled.

"How did you know?"

"A little bird with white eyes told me" Shikamaru muttered, cleaning the bleeding wound and trying to not feel the warm blood-damp skin under his fingertips.

"Hanabi".

"She's worried about you..."

Neji snorted, but the sound became a pained whine as soon as Shikamaru put a patch on the injury making it sting painfully.

"Sorry" the Nara whispered, their eyes connecting again.

Damn, he wanted to lean in and kiss the moron badly.

"Why didn't you get a check-up?"

Neji looked away and breathed shakily because of the pain.

"I was tired".

The shadow-nin stayed quiet and waited. He didn't know what he was waiting for; he just didn't want to leave.

The whole situation confused Neji. What was the deer-nin doing there anyway? Shikamaru was supposed to be the one who didn't give a shit about him...But it was a lie and deep down Neji's heart he knew Shikamaru cared for him.

During the last week he had felt the chunin's chakra in the Hokage Tower every day he went there, and every time Shikamaru would hide from him or ward off, like a scared animal. In the beginning it made the Hyuga feel pained, but then it started making his blood stir, he wanted so much to look inside those dark eyes and smirk like a badass as if he had won a bet.

During the mission he couldn't focus well enough, the wound stood there as proof. He couldn't remember the last time he was wounded like that…Neji couldn't keep living like this. So after reporting the mission he didn't want to receive medical attention, he wanted to look at the injured skin and make his heart understand it was no good for him to keep thinking about Shikamaru.

He felt a hand touching the scratches over his pale chest oh so tender, making him close his eyes for a second and desire it was not just a procedure to make sure he had no more injuries.

If Shikamaru could see under flesh and bones he would see his scarred heart. The Hyuga was glad the shadow-nin didn't have this ability though.

"Shikamaru..." he whispered, opening his eyes seeing the man very close to him, brushing salve upon scarred pale skin "You should leave now" he said, closing his eyes again, he didn't want to deal with another farewell nor with those beautiful deep black eyes.

"I said I'm not leaving" he repeated, making the white eyes open again and watch him through heavy lids.

The Nara pressed his hand against the other's brow feeling the temperature.

"You're febrile" he stated, putting the blankets up and covering the pale body, trying to not notice too much that the man was naked.

"I'm fine" he insisted, resisting the weird sensation of having his forehead exposed to Shikamaru so openly "You should just leave".

The silence made their eyes connect again. It was a cold night and Shikamaru was there, taking care of him.

"Yeah, I should" the Nara murmured agreeing, scratching the back of his head and looking away. He put his hand down, resting it on his lap. "But I can't" he confessed, his voice low when their eyes met "I can't rest" he said and it sounded pained for both of them "I'll just watch you sleep and make sure you are fine" his voice turned out strategic "I'll not be here by the time you wake up".

They stayed like this for more than a minute, looking at each other without saying a word. Neji felt something warm bloom inside his chest and it was good but scary at the same time, this shouldn't be happening.

But it was.

And Shikamaru was looking sad and lonely, as much as himself.

"It's cold" Neji whispered "You should cover yourself" the words came out by itself, but he didn't regret, it was exactly what he was feeling: cold and tired.

Midnight eyes looked surprised and then grateful, the man pulled off his sandals and chunin waistcoat and made himself comfortable beside the long haired man on the futon, covering them both with the warm blanket.

They looked at each other in the eyes until the sleepiness dragged them into a word of dreams and rest.

x

When Neji woke up Shikamaru was not there anymore. The bed was cold and he was wrapped with the blanket. He found on the night table some Nara medicines, patches and salves, those that Yoshino used on them when they fought.

His wound was still open and painful, but the healing had already started. He felt pain when stood up but endured it, thinking about the last thing he remembered before falling asleep: Shikamaru's eyes. Dark and caring eyes studying his face as if it was a puzzle or a Shogi board.

Damn, it shouldn't have happened. They were supposed to keep away for at least two weeks.

Neji fingered his long hair, pulling it over his left shoulder and looking stoically at the big bruise in his right. The small movement in the dim light of the room made a new flash of remembrance pop up in his brain, making him shiver.

Shikamaru's fingers caressing his long hair, removing it from his face, the hovering fingers brushed lightly against his seal mark and he breathed shakily, his fingertips pressing lightly against Neji's lips and after that the Nara young man stood up, looked back and left through the window.

The Hyuga sighed, his bottom lip trembling with the ghost sensation of having Shikamaru's thumb on it, touching him goodbye.

He put on a yukata, the cold making his body feel uncomfortable and the injured ribs agitated. Neji looked at his bed, he could smell Shikamaru all over it, he could sense his presence there if he closed his eyes, but he wouldn't.

_I must be strong. _

A fluffy fur pressed against his shins, stealing a small smile from his lips as soon as his white eyes focused on his cat.

"Hey, Chibi..." his voice sounded hoarse from the sleep, but the warm touch of the animal's fur against his skin managed to make his chest feel less lonely than it really was "Are you hungry?"

The cat purred a meow and he nodded.

"Let's have breakfast".

He needed to keep moving, to endure the loneliness and the pain. He was going to make it. He was the Hyuga genius after all; it was the least he could do.

Several days passed by and Neji didn't see Shikamaru for six long days. Each night he waited till he couldn't fight the sleep anymore; wishing, wondering, hoping the shadow-nin would appear through his window and lay by his side, inches apart but yet there, sharing body heat and silent words.

But Shikamaru didn't come back.

x

He was nervous. The whole shit was nerve wrecking. Shikamaru couldn't think properly and Sakura kept talking about some weird disease an old ninja had and that he was in the hospital. Naruto was laughing too loud and Choji ate almost all the barbecue though Ino was quietly sat by his side.

She was better, he was sure of it but she wasn't the same yet.

_Neither am I..._

At least Sasuke was not there with his stupid smirks or his loftiness that usually made Shikamaru want to snap and shove the Uchiha's face against the barbecue grill.

Ino shared an understanding glance and played with her hashi.

"Maa, maa, look who is here!" a loud barking voice made its way to Shikamaru's eardrums and he wanted to die.

It has been a very bad week. He was trying his best to not go after Neji and just look at him, contemplating the older man during his sleep, as he did that day and in the day after.

But that second time he just stayed outside the window minutes before the dawn, suppressing his chakra to not disturb the other's rest. The Hyuga looked better and there were no signs of pain in his beautiful sleepy face.

So Shikamaru forced himself to believe he was ok and that he didn't need to go check on him anymore.

It was very difficult. He needed to exhibit as much control as he could to not find himself by the Gentle Fist ninja's window, watching his pale frame while he was asleep.

He felt tired. The last day he slept well was the one beside Neji, on the same futon, under the same blanket, sharing human heat and the same air.

_Troublesome..._

And here he was again, thinking about that night, thinking of how hard it was to crawl out of the bed and leave Neji there. He wanted to wait for those pure moon eyes open and stare inside them, making sure he knew he was still there.

But he couldn't.

He was so troubled his brain was shutting down during daybreak, making him rest the minimum hours he needed to be ok during the day. But right now, with all those ninja there, speaking loudly and laughing he just wanted to kill them all.

The headache was becoming a snowball in the back of his head, big, painful, troublesome.

He looked out of the glass window and thought about how cold it was outside. December had begun and the sky looked like a huge cloud, grey and white all over it.

"Where is your boyfriend, Shikamaru?" Kiba asked laughing and Shikamaru wondered if he should punch him again, but he just rolled his eyes bored.

"I don't have one" he muttered, drinking his warm sake and watching Sakura's green eyes look at him expectantly "But if you're talking about Neji, he must be in town, he came back from a mission yesterday, I collected the report from Tenten" he said bored and kept looking at the pink haired girl.

He was almost sure Sasuke told her something stupid.

"So you still keep an eye on him..." Kiba said smirking at him.

"What is your problem, Kiba?" he stared at the dog-nin tiredly "You can make a move on him if you want, as far as I know he's single" Shikamaru said, his voice still bored and low but he was sure Ino and Chouji would notice the hint of bitterness in his smooth tones.

"Maa, I was just kiddin' man, don't be like that" he sat next to Naruto and they started talking about something else.

If Shikamaru knew Kiba was going to pass by he would have declined the dinner invitation. Ino stirred by his side and looked at him with a small smile, she knew more than any other there, she talked to Neji three days ago before he went off on his last mission.

Neji told her that Shikamaru had visited and taken care of him, and that he couldn't stop thinking about the blond's friend. He said it all with a heartbreakingly sad voice. She had told him Genma was helping her and that she was doing great.

They had spent almost an hour talking about her recovering, it felt good to talk to Neji, he was all sharp bones and soft heart. She laughed at him when he told her he missed Shikamaru and she started fangirling, but then they remained silent for a long time before she understood he in fact liked Shikamaru very much and that this was doing him no good.

But the kunoichi couldn't say that the Nara was acting weird since they broke the bond, it was not her business. Both men were old enough to deal with their own stuff, even if they were running away from the moment of confession, because, really, they would need to talk about it someday.

Eventually the moment would come and the ninjas would need to face their feelings.

So she smiled even brighter to her teammate "What do you think about another bottle of warm sake?" she asked and saw his eyes shine a bit, maybe because she was smiling to him, and it was a real smile and not one of those fake ones.

"Why not, is Saturday and I don't need to work tomorrow" he said and smiled back, patting on her shoulder and asking the waitress for another bottle of sake.

After that the dinner went calm and agreeable because Ino would talk to him every single time stupid Kiba said something stupid. But when he thought it was late enough to leave Shikamaru made his way to the cash register and paid not only his part but Ino's too, he didn't know why he just wanted to do this, so he left the establishment to the freezing December evening.

It was very cold and his breath became a small cloud when the hot air touched the freezing breeze. Shikamaru shoved his hands into his trousers pockets and started walking. The sake made his insides warm, his head was light and slow, he hadn't felt like this for weeks.

He lit a cigarette and walked to the Nara clan. But something pulled inside him, twisting weirdly and making him become very attentive, stilling in place. That chakra, he knew it very well and he didn't need to see to make sure he felt it; Neji was somewhere near.

Shikamaru looked around seeing the older man sat by Ichiraku's Ramen with Tokuma.

He growled, a bitter taste in the back of his throat as soon as jealousy started to pool inside his chest. That was terrible. They were eating peacefully and talking, Tokuma smiled at Neji many times and Shikamaru wanted to punch that stupid smile away, he could feel his chakra stiffening and so did Neji, because the man turned his head fast and their eyes met.

Mooneyes eclipsing his mind.

The Nara took a drag at his cigarette and walked away. It was no good to stay there, watching Neji and his former lover chatting and flirting.

Something burned him inside out. He didn't want to feel it, he didn't want to think about him, he was tired, upset, furious. Fuck, he could even fight Tokuma right now - even it being extremely troublesome and insane - and take Neji away from him.

_What the fuck?!_

Neji wasn't his. Neji wasn't even talking to him. They have nothing at all and he was being troublesomely jealous. Sick, that was just sick.

He smoked the damned cigarette, thinking about how stupid he was being about the Hyuga, and that it shouldn't be happening, after all the bond was gone and they were not feeling attached anymore.

Or at least they shouldn't be.

But maybe it wasn't completely broken. As far as he remembered Shikaku wasn't sure if the shadow bond and the chakra bond would disappear at the same time with the same process. So there was a small possibility that it had gone wrong.

Shikamaru walked fast and tried to empty his mind, it made no sense at all. Hiashi told them the bond was gone, he just needed to get used to the distance and that was going to be ok.

Something deep inside his chest was aching so much and it felt so good every time he thought about Neji, he was always so worried when the older jounin went on missions, he just wanted to feel the man one more time close to his body, he wanted to touch his pale skin and kiss those beautiful lips.

_It's driving me crazy!_

He tugged on his own hair, feeling it hurt and let it go.

_Dammit! _

He was on the edge, he couldn't keep up with this feeling, it was stabbing inside, twisting painfully in his heart. He stopped in the middle of the path, near the deer and closed his eyes.

Shikamaru was useless, his brain was damaged, he couldn't think or analyse anymore because he wasn't capable of resting or sleeping normally. The headache in the back of his head grew intense and he breathed heavy and shakily. God, he needed a break.

_Please..._

He felt like shit when arrived home, the aroma of burning wood made him think about the bonfire and it made things worse. The idea of Neji confessing was bittersweet, because it was bond influenced and he didn't give much a shit about it then, but now, having Neji confessing to him would make him as happy as a man could ever be.

_C'mon scratch this bullshit!_

Shikamaru went to the kitchen and watched his father drinking sake. His mother wasn't there, so he let himself fall onto the chair and poured sake in a small cup.

"Shogi?" his father asked in his bored tone and he agreed, both man walking lazily to the dojo in the back of the house and sitting on the tatami floor.

They were quiet and played smoothly. Over an hour they kept the game on and after Shikaku won the first match they started it all over again.

Shikamaru was so out of character and lost in thoughts about the Hyuga man he didn't noticed he was staring at the paws for almost fifteen minutes and that his father was waiting patiently for his next move.

He snorted and moved a pawn. His mind was messed up and he couldn't take Neji away from the massive overloaded brain. The chuunin shouldn't be thinking about him, he shouldn't be missing him so damn much, he shouldn't be feeling Neji under his skin anymore. That was over, it has been sixteen days already.

_Stop. Thinking._

But his brain wouldn't drop and slow down; he should drown himself in sake and wait for the alcoholic coma to take a break on the loops that were driving him crazy. _Completely out of it._

"Shikamaru?"

He ignored his father, keeping his eyes on the board thinking about pawns and Shogi strategy and Neji and the former bond and reports and missions and Neji and him and feelings and sake and killing himself and sleeping and arakiri and Neji and Tokuma and them both dating and him alone by himself and Neji again and-

"Stop it, kid, you're hurting yourself."

He blinked and looked down; his nails had clawed the calloused skin of the palm of his hands. It hurt and he could see the blood under his nails and the marks over the wounded flesh.

_Shit._

The young Nara stared blankly at his hands, they shook much more than Ino's hands today, he was losing it, he was getting mad, angrier than normal.

_I'm nuts..._

He bit down in his bottom lip and took the sake cup, trying to not let it shake too much he drew the liquid down his throat, calming down as his eyes locked with his father's.

The man said nothing, he just waited. Shikaku always knew when to say something and when to be quiet. So the man stayed there watching how messed up his son was, how lost he was, and as much as it tore him apart it was part of the process.

Shikamaru was in denial. Deep and painful denial.

"Why?" the cracked voice hovered out in a shaky whisper "Why do I still feel him?"

The young ninja fought back the tears of loss and rage. He was so tired, he needed rest but he couldn't get any, his own body denied him it.

"You said you'd broken the bond!" he blurted out, spitting the words as senbons.

"And I did, son."

"So what is happening to me?" he asked, fisting his hands and looking outrageous "Why do I feel it all over me? Why do I still feel him?!"

"You're a genius, Shikamaru, you can figure it out by yourself".

"Damn dad, I _need_ your help!"

Shikaku tensed up. There was his kid, looking like a small shattered boy, completely lost. Shikamaru wasn't good with emotional intelligence. The man sighed, seeing the pain inside those liquid black orbs was heart-breaking.

"What is this pain? All this restless feeling?" the chuunin inquired weary.

Shikaku blinked slowly and focused both midnight gazes again:

"We call it love, kid."

Shikamaru gasped and froze.

_Love...?_

His father was deadly serious looking at him in the eyes.

_Am I in love...with Neji?_

Shikaku sighed and put the pawns back in the wooden box of the Shogi board.

_Am I? Is that why I...can't stop thinking of him?_

He didn't need to think much. He should have seen that coming. But he was so afraid of it that he blinded himself, he tried to deny.

It pained him and scarred his heart, made him worry sick and sad. But when he was with the Hyuga it was peace and calmness and warm waves and...

_Love._

The old jounin nodded and looked down.

"You love the Hyuga, Shikamaru, accept it."

Yes, he did love Neji.

The chunin stood up. He was dizzy, he was feeling drunk with all the news and he didn't understand it but he needed to get out of there, he wanted to talk to Neji. They _needed_ to talk. So Shikamaru walked out of the house and disappeared through the night.

* * *

><p><strong>AN:** I'm mean, I know. And I'm sad this is almost over, so be nice and leave a review, make me know if you like it and how you like it. Thank you for all the feedback, followings and faves! Love you all dears. :3

The name of the chapter "_Tie your heart at night to mine_" is from a Pablo Neruda's poem. He is my favorite poet so I couldn't stop it, hope you like the tittle :D

Was the chappie good? Shika? Neji? I'm curious about your thoughts!

Love, tai xxx


	15. Checkmate

_Finally. Sorry about the delay. Uni and work started all together. :/ Hope you enjoy! :D_

Beta: Kuroda Miharu, as always ^^

* * *

><p><strong><em>When Shadows Surround You<em>**

**.**

**Chapter 15 **

_Checkmate_

* * *

><p>The air felt thick and shadowy. Neji missed this feeling so very much that he recognized it instantly. His pale-white eyes quickly looking for its owner and facing the shadow's manipulator a second after.<p>

_Shikamaru..._

Boiling black irises held the glance for a mere moment, but turned and left as fast as it made itself present, stealing the Hyuga's breath away.

Neji could still feel the rich chakra. It was everywhere, or maybe he got so used to it he could sense it all over him; surrounding his body, the whole air and the space between him and Shikamaru.

_You're driving me crazy... _

He heard Tokuma asking something but didn't even bother to answer. He watched the spot where Shikamaru's body stood a minute ago. Damn, he wanted to run after him, chase him down and _touch_ him. Feel the warm skin under his fingertips and make the bastard assume that it was hard; that he needed him back.

Because the idea of being the only one hungry for the other, or the only one craving for more was butchering his pride and sanity.

"Tokuma, I'm leaving." He announced, standing up and throwing some money onto the counter.

"I-"

"No. I need to think," he cut his cousin and didn't look back.

His feet drove him home quickly. He didn't even need to think about it. He was messed up about Shikamaru and his brain was shifting thoughts in a heartbeat.

Streets. House roofs. Backyards. Hyuga Compound. No words of greeting.

Something deep inside his brain was short-circuiting. Everything made him think about the lazy ninja; how he would complain about something troublesome; how his dark midnight eyes would look at him bored and even then Neji would see black fire burning deep inside.

It was insane.

The Byakugan user knew about his feelings for the younger shinobi. But Neji was sure that what had been shining bright like strong fire in those beautiful black eyes was desire, randiness, bond influenced arousal. Nothing more than that.

He tried to not think about the man anymore, but it was difficult.

In fact, it was impossible.

The long haired man opened the door and went inside, taking off his sandals and hissing at the imagery of another pair of shoes right beside his.

He blinked, pissed off, and stared stubbornly at the empty floor.

"Shit!"

Neji walked into the bathroom, took off his robes and decided he needed to stop thinking.

He couldn't keep doing that; it was endangering his missions and his yield. The Hyuga wouldn't allow it to destroy his ninja career. He was going to deal with it.

The warm water relaxed his tensed muscles and his mind went blank for a moment, until the memories of the thick chakra surrounding him as a warm strong shadow wormed its way through his mental screen and all he could think was...

"Nara...get the hell out of my mind!" his voice sounded rough and upset. "Come on..." he muttered.

But it wouldn't go away.

His hands slid on soapy tiles and he grabbed the faucet, turning the warm water into cold, freezing drops. His whole body protested shivering and goose bumping, but he stayed under the freezing shower until he wasn't feeling his fingers anymore.

Although he tried hard, he could still feel Shikamaru under his skin.

He couldn't get rid of the images of the chuunin inside his head. It was like the whisper of the wind, like a ghost caress...

_Damn_, it was sick.

He dried his body angrily and put on a yukata. His bare feet defeating the cold floor as punishment to his own body, as if trying to make it understand he couldn't think about Shikamaru. Because the Nara wasn't thinking about him.

Or so he thought.

The man stepped out of the bathroom, walked through the house and into the kitchen in long hard steps. Neji prepared the tea slowly. He wanted to savour the moment, watching the brew steam and the scent of green herbs surround him.

If he could pay attention to the current moment, he wouldn't think about Shikamaru.

But the moment he stepped into the living room and sat by the kotatsu his attention slipped away. He could remember how the other ninja liked it, how he had told Yoshino about the piece of furniture...

In fact Neji didn't like it. To be there alone again. The feeling of having Shikamaru was so strong and intense that it made loneliness even harder.

The tea was nice and spread a bit of warmth inside him. Like waves of kindness.  
>Was he weak? Was he crazy?<p>

The truth was that Neji never thought someone could break the barrier he had built around him years ago. When Tokuma did that, it felt right and normal. They understood each other and lived the same problems.

But Shikamaru sneaked his way in. Like his shadows; he got in slowly, spreading a weird feeling of protectiveness and contentment.

If he closed his eyes he could still remember how he felt odd laying on Shikamaru's bed that first night. The feeling of being ashamed, worried and pissed off at the same time. How he felt shy by the chunin's side, trying relentlessly to sleep without succeeding until late into night.

That first night he watched the chuunin sleep quietly. He thought how weird it was to share a bed with the laziest ninja ever. But now the idea would send sparks running all over his body. Awaking instincts, lust and desire...

Neji sucked a breath and trembled. His fists closed into strong balls. He closed his eyes and sighed.

He could remember everything like photographic memory.

Shikamaru talking Hanabi into better behavior. His surprised expression when he saw the house where Neji lived. Their moment in the kitchen; how thick the air felt when their bodies pressed against each other...

_God. I miss him._

Shikamaru's exasperation when he understood the procedure they would need to do.

Like flashes, the images of their days together rolled inside Neji's mind.

Yoshino's kitchen. Their first kiss, tasting like soap and freedom.

Shikamaru's hand massaging his scalp, washing his hair, thumbing his cage seal...

Lust boiling their bodies until Tokuma appeared again. And it was ridiculous, because if Tokuma didn't they would have...wouldn't they?

Neji took a sip on his green tea.

He felt alone in that kotatsu. He felt it wasn't right to be there, alone. Loneliness was something he could get used to again, but it was a different grade of loneliness after tasting Shikamaru's quiet company.

"Damn..."

The man fingered his damp hair and looked around.

He could imagine and reproduce Shikamaru's shadows trying to strangle him in the pub. He could recreate the lust and the rage; feeling the blood stirring inside his veins as he closed his eyes to watch their drunken steps into the hall. Clothes discarded over the floor and the kisses, the burning touches; the first time they tried drunkenly to release the bond.

Neji could still feel how warm and thick Shikamaru's seeds felt against his fingers.

"Stop it, Neji." His own voice sounded deep and far away, echoing against the walls.

But he was completely lost. He couldn't fight his own mind popping images in his thoughts.

How they fought in the Hokage's Tower. How it was enraged and lustful at the same time. Their bodies pressing together as they tossed and punched and kicked.

He would miss their conversations.

He would miss everything.

He would miss waking up to see that beautiful, tan and warm body by his side.

Neji closed his eyes. Tea forgotten on the table. Lids feeling heavy. His whole being feeling tired and sad and longing for the other man.

It wasn't fair.

"Why fate? Why did I fall in love with someone that cannot comprehend my feelings?"

His voice sounded cracked. Neji felt ashamed at his own tone. He sounded so much like a broken person he was afraid of discovering he really was torn.

"Am I?"

And with closed eyes he felt Shikamaru's presence.

For a second he could sense the thick warm embrace of shadows surrounding him. In the dim light of the house he let himself think that it was true.

He ached for a kiss, he longed for a caress.

He thought how rough the Nara's bare body would feel under his fingertips.

He fingered his wet hair and cold droplets fell over his neck and half exposed shoulders, making him shiver.

Neji opened his eyes, staring at the ceiling. He couldn't let it win. He should stick to his pride and be as rational as he used to be.

_Time for training._

The words in his mind made something change inside. They were obvious, rational and touchable. He could deal with body harm and excess of training. This kind of muscular pain would make heartache feel smaller.

He stood up and went to his room. Put some sparring clothes on and walked to the backyard.

_Need to keep sane._

Byakugan activated.

x

It was cold. It was terribly cold and he felt lost walking through the Nara's Forest.

The herd was quiet and possibly sleeping somewhere, but the stark was watching him as he walked adrift by the ancient trees.

His eyes looked shadowy and his hands were shaking. His heart throbbed so much inside his chest he didn't know what he should do to make it easier.

At first, he thought he should run after Neji and tell him what he was just trying to accept.

_I'm in love._

But the idea of looking inside those opal eyes. The image of that long black mane. It was all so overwhelming right now he chose to not go looking for him.

He was afraid.

He needed to understand it first.

He had never felt this way before.

With Kurenai it was such a fragile feeling; almost as if he needed to do that for Asuma's sake. But now...now he was feeling it fully.

And love hurts.

Shikamaru sat by a tree and tried to watch the clouds. But they were too much like a mass of grey and white all over the sky. So he closed his eyes and tried to look inside.

He tried to watch himself.

The mess was still there. Moving like crazy in his overloaded mind. His heart was aching and beating too fast. He just wanted to sleep. To fall in a bed and let it be.

But Shikamaru didn't feel confident enough to go back to his house. Not now that his father knew. Not to the bed he had slept in with Neji.

"Fuck."

His voice sounded weak and the stark came closer, sniffing him. The hot breath of the animal formed a small cloud and Shikamaru almost smiled. Patting the stark's muzzle and thanking him silently.

He needed to talk to someone, but he wasn't very fond of talking to animals.

The chunin stayed there for a while. Feeling his heart start beating slower, his breath back to normality. His mind still racing like a madman, but he could think properly now, not just mixing a thousand thoughts at the same time.

And the only person that came to his mind - someone he could talk about what was happening - made him hiss and curse.

"Troublesome..."

x

She was washing the dishes and waiting for her tea brew when shadows surrounded her thickly. A figure formed on the other side of the window and she drew a pale hand to her heart at the same time the other put a kunai front.

Green eyes focused black ones and she sighed, closing her eyes.

"Goddamnit shadows, Shikamaru!" she grunted. Kunai back to its place and her free hand running over pink hair, trying to dissuade the tremor on her fingers.

"Knock on the door or make some noise," she mumbled. Then she stopped and looked right at him again.

Shikamaru looked tired.

"Are you ok?" Her voice was firm as she nodded him to come in.

He didn't move.

"You look tired," she kept going as he didn't answer her. "You should sleep or you'll easily run out of chakra," then she smiled and looked at her teacup. "You're not going to hear me, are you? As the boys...men, you're all so _troublesome_."

The pink haired kunoichi stared at him.

She wasn't upset, but he could easily say she didn't like to be ignored even if she was used to it.

He looked away.

"What are you doing here, Shikamaru. It's almost midnight," this time she sounded almost pissed.

"Is Sasuke...?"

"At the backyard. Training, but-"

He looked up at her before walking away.

"Do you want some tea?" she sounded just like his mother and he cracked a sad smile.

"Thank you, Sakura."

"At least please rest a bit!" She warned as he started walking away.

Shikamaru rounded the house thinking about the stories they would create about the Uchiha compound. That it had ghosts in it, or that some evil spirit lived there. He never thought about how bad it had been to Sasuke when he was just a kid listening about it.

Listening to the stories about a cursed Clan that was washed away from the Earth.

He shivered at the dim light.

It was such a stupid thing to say, especially when the only one who lived was a kid in your classroom.

He could hear the pant from the corner of the house as he turned and watched Sasuke hitting a wooden post. His kicks were fast and strong. It could knock down an average chunin like him easily.

Shikamaru sighed.

What the fuck was he doing there?

_Shit._

"Humour me," the bastard's voice sounded harsh as he kicked the poor post again. "Are you here to tell me I was wrong - which would mean you're still in denial. Or you're here to tell me I was unfortunately right?"

The Nara stopped mid-step and turned away.

_This is ridiculous. What am I doing here? Why is this douchebag even talking all smartass over me?_

"Shikamaru," Sasuke's voice sounded serious this time. "Are you ok?"

"Fuck you!"

The Uchiha stared at the other's back. "Spill it," he demanded, knowing the hard part was on its way.

"How did you know it then?" the Nara growled, turning again to see black irises just in front of him.

_Such a great ninja. Not even a sound. _

"You don't understand yet?"

This voice sounded so human, everyone would deny it was Sasuke's. But Shikamaru knew this sound; the sound of true feelings coming to the surface of a dark mask.

"It's hurting me," he muttered. His own voice so shattered he wanted to cry. "My father needed to say it in my face to make me see it, Sasuke!" he said shaking. "And it hurts..."

His eyes stung and Sasuke's expressionless façade was driving him mad. Was it that difficult to show a human expression in this moment?

"This is just the first part," the raven said, his voice sounding calm. "Denial gone, you have something to work with."

Shikamaru crouched and hid his face in his palms. He was so tired.

He needed a break. The chunin didn't want to feel anything right now.

He wanted peaceful feelings. White and kind as summer clouds.

_As Neji's eyes._

The thought drove a sharp pain right through his chest and he shook. It somewhat reminded him of the pain they used to feel being steps apart. And it made him want that 10 days back.

_All of them. _

"You're shaking. Let's go inside," Sasuke touched his back. "You should rest."

A pair of callused strong hands took him by his shoulders and helped him stand, then guided him inside.

Warm blankets surrounded Shikamaru and he wanted so much to sleep...

"Sakura," Sasuke's voice was almost tender as he entered the kitchen, leaving the Nara standing lost in the middle of the living room. "Shikamaru is spending the night."

"I'll prepare some tea. He looks like shit...Shikamaru needs to sleep, Sasuke-kun," her voice sounded low and concerned, it made the Nara almost smile.

"I know," he answered and moved around the kitchen. "Where is Naruto?"

"He should be back soon. He was with Kiba and Choji," she explained with her mother-like voice.

"Ok..." the raven muttered, and after some unsounding steps, Sasuke was back at the living room. "Let's go."

While they walked through the house, Shikamaru felt his heart throb. He shouldn't be there. He was supposed to be in the Hyuuga compound, talking to Neji. Telling him what he was feeling.

_But what if he doesn't feel the same?_

The idea made him close his eyes for a second and walk blindly behind Sasuke. Following him by his soundless steps and the heat of his body.

Maybe Neji was with Tokuma again.

They looked pretty comfy with each other at Ichiraku. The slight idea of them being back in a relationship made Shikamaru open his eyes quickly. He absorbed the information as fast as he could, and his heart skipped a beat.

What was he thinking?

He wasn't Neji's owner. How would Neji know what was he thinking or feeling if he didn't say it straight to him?

"You can stay here," Sasuke's voice sounded calm and deep like the ocean, cutting the other's thoughts.

Shikamaru blinked twice at the room. The blanket was bright orange and it was a big mess.

"It's Naruto's room," the Uchiha sighed. "He's such a messy..." he started picking some old plastic ramen cups and proceeded to shove some clothes inside the closet. "He will sleep in mine," the statement sounded as low as it could be, though Shikamaru heard it.

After some awkward minutes they sat on the bed. Sakura brought them tea and wished them good night. It was nice to see how they dealt with each other, it made Nara feel warm inside. Who knew old friends could rebuild a relationship after such a big war...

"Do you want to talk about it?" the Uchiha asked quietly, sipping at his tea.

No, he didn't. He had no idea how to start it. How to say something.

Shikamaru lay on the bed and stared at the ceiling.

What could he say?

"I'm confused."

Sasuke didn't answer to that.

"Not about my feelings, but about Neji..."

He had a lot of questions about the other.

Would Neji feel the same? Would he like to know how Shikamaru felt? Would he think it was bond influenced?

"I think I'm going to let time work its way on us," he decided.

Dark orbs watched him carefully. Then the Uchiha nodded and chuckled.

"After all you are a genius," the host sighed. "You know how to deal with feelings by yourself."

"Mah...I'm sure mom would say I'm running away from it," he smirked, feeling the warmth of the blanket start making him feel lazy, cozy, dizzy. "I just need time to figure it out..." he explained to the ceiling while the other stayed there looking at him.

A door opened far away and both stirred a bit. They knew it was Naruto because of his chakra, though it felt like they didn't want anyone else to see them there.

"Thanks for the shelter," the Nara muttered. "How did you know it from the beginning, by the way?"

Sasuke snorted and got up slowly.

"Isn't it obvious?" he asked cocky. "If you have the possibility of feeling how someone else feels, see how this person reacts to the situations around them while knowing their feelings. If you get underneath the underneath; under their flesh and bones. Wouldn't you understand that person?"

A heavy weight landed over Shikamaru's chest. He felt exactly that most of the time with Neji. Seeing the real him. Feeling him under his skin.

"I guess so..."

"Wouldn't you love this person now that you really know them?"

Sasuke's voice sounded velvety as he opened the door and got out, closing it the exact moment Naruto arrived the hallway. Shikamaru could hear the rustle of steps and mumble of voices.

"Dobe, you're coming with me," there was no room to let Naruto turn him down, though his voice sounded almost playful to the Uchiha's standards.

"How can you be so bossy sometimes? Teme!" the blond kept cursing loudly till their steps disappeared down the dim hallway.

The silence made Shikamaru think about what Sasuke just said.

Was it possible to not love someone you've seen as open and bare as one could be? From inside out? Was someone capable of not falling in love with the heart of a good person?

_And the charms..._

The Nara rolled on the bed and hid his face in Naruto's pillow. It smelled like ramen, Naruto and Sasuke. It made him roll again and stare at the closed window, thinking about those two for a while.

Shikamaru needed to rest, to calm down and sleep. He snorted and fidgeted till his mind was focused on just one person. His eyes were on the grey clouds through the glass and his head on a name and a beautiful face.

"Feels like you surrounded me. Is it checkmate, Neji?" He asked himself before falling asleep.

It felt like days, but just a night had passed.

When Sakura woke him up with a motherly smile and a cup of tea, he was so rested and refreshed he couldn't believe.

"It was yesterday's tea," the pink haired kunoichi said. "I'm sorry. You looked restless, I just wanted to help," she apologised with a tender smile and he thanked her.

They had breakfast together and talked about the weather as if nothing were wrong. Haruno didn't ask him about the last night and Shikamaru felt glad.  
>With time, his feelings matured, his head lightened and his heart stopped beating so fast. He was growing used to the fact he was in love. Though he kept running away from Neji every time he felt his chakra nearby.<p>

Maybe he needed Hanabi to make him go after the Hyuuga and talk to him. But he was so used to running away, that the possibility of confronting their problem was still too scary to deal with.

So, the days finally passed by.

x

_It's already time to make a move. _

The thought made him feel sick.

Neji's stomach froze and his hands sweated. The last month made him understand that Shikamaru was not going to cooperate. He would still run or hide from him, and it would make the Hyuuga feel terrible.

He got used to the idea of not having Shikamaru. He even felt better this way: no love problems, no chains, no bond.

But it hurt to be completely ignored.

The Nara was not just a bond-mate, he was also a great friend in potential, and – after their ten days together - he could say Shikamaru was someone he would like to keep closer.

Like a loved one.

Or, as Lee would put it down: his _Most Treasured Person_. Though Neji would never pronounce the words aloud; thinking of it was already over the top.

So, when his chance appeared, he decided it was on his hands to grab it and make good use of the fact that he could try to keep Shikamaru as a friend.

_Even if it's just to play shogi on Sundays..._

The idea made him shudder. Yes, it was enough. At least they could talk.

The last weeks were harsh on him; going on missions and dealing with not being loved in return was harder than he expected it to be. Hinata talked to him and so did Tokuma, but he just got over it when he comprehended that Shikamaru's presence as friend was more important than his one-sided feelings.

Then Neji decided he didn't want to keep him apart and that the love he felt would fade away soon.

Or so he wished.

Tokuma had laughed at him when he shared the thought and said something about Hyuuga people really being stubborn and masochist.

The long-haired jounin felt his temples in a cold sweat when he saw Shikamaru sat alone at Ichiraku's.

This was his chance: was now or never.

He crossed the street and sat by the chuunin's side without hesitation. Any good chakra analyser would sense how agitated his tenketsu and pathways were, but he just took a deep breath and asked for a bowl of pork ramen.

Shikamaru stared at him as soon as his voice sounded, making the younger raise his eyes from his food in shock.

"Don't choke, please," Neji said expressionless. He moved his chakra through his body to balance it and easy his heartbeats.

The silence grew odd and both stirred at their stools.

"I know what you're doing," Neji muttered, his voice as even as he could put it. He really wanted Shikamaru to feel the same, but if it wasn't happening he was going to make it work in some different way.

The chuunin took a big sip at his green tea to make the noodles go down his throat. He felt his body tense and all his strength went to his legs: he was prepared to run. It was like an innate instinct - one that now he wasn't very proud of, though it had helped many times during missions.

But now, facing the man he was in love with, his innate ability was making him punch himself and stop running away. So he controlled it.

Neji was there for some reason. He was trying to talk to him, so he only needed to listen. He tried to calm down and bring his focus back to his brain and less to his legs.

He would need to think.

"I'm not upset, though I think it would be understandable if I were," Neji kept talking. Then he sighed and looked at the shadow-nin in the eyes. "Stop running away from me."

Shikamaru looked at him with those dark expressive eyes like he was lost. He could feel his blood rush in the back of his ears and his heart was slamming inside his ribcage. He didn't expect Neji to be so blunt about that.

It was incredible how well the Hyuuga knew him and it startled a known ache on his guts. Neji had seen him inside out. He had felt his feelings and understood how he worked.

So, why didn't he fall in love too?

_He didn't, right?_

Shikamaru put his hashi down and thought what he should say in that moment. He couldn't find the words to apologise properly. Was Neji aware of his feelings? Did he sense it? Was he being so obvious?

"Let bygones be bygones."

The words sank in and it hurt Shikamaru more than everything.

_Neji doesn't feel it..._

"Sure," he answered low and started eating again.

Neji's ramen arrived and they kept a nice silence for a while.

_Stupid. Fucking coward... _

Shikamaru was feeling guilty of not telling his true thoughts and feelings about it and, weirdly as it seemed, he could feel Neji was not completely fine with their _truce._ The lines in his aristocratic face were stiffened as if he was holding back a lot of things.

_Maybe he..._

What if he felt the same? How could Shikamaru know?

_Goddammit, you're a strategist, think of something!_

He rummaged through his head about how could be the best way at least of discovering why Neji was not completely fine. No strategies were good enough; he had no idea of what kind of conversation could lead him to an answer, so he focused on something they were used to:

_Feel him._

His mind processed the idea and, easily, he let his chakra enlarge like the soft touch of smoke.

Then, shadows surrounded Neji.

The Hyuuga felt warm and tickle as if the air had small electronic pulses. The sensation was not alien, in fact it made him feel at home.

He stopped his hashi in mid-air and his jaw got tense. It was Shikamaru's chakra, and it was the same as the first day they were bound.

It felt like a delicious house arrest. It was kind and felt like he was scanning something.

The sense of longing made Neji shiver a bit and he bite his bottom lip before starting to eat again. He didn't want to show Shikamaru the nostalgia he felt. He was sure if he looked in the chuunin's shadowy eyes the other was going to see not just yearning, he was going to see all the feelings Neji was trying to hide and hold back.

"We should play Shogi someday," the Hyuuga commented instead. His velvety tones undulating around the vocal chords to disguise his real feelings.

_Touch him._

"Sounds good," Shikamaru said low, straightening his shoulders and feeling his insides stir.

Should he touch Neji?

What difference would it make?

What would he understand by the touch?

Would he leave because of the closeness?

_Stop running away, Shikamaru._

His hands started sweating as he felt Neji's still tensed form surrounded by his chakra. So he melted it away and felt how bad it was to stop feeling him inside his shadows.

_Just touch him._

Neji's breath become easier again and Shikamaru stared at his beautiful profile. He missed him, he thought about Neji all the time, he craved for a kiss or a bare touch of hands...he wanted him. God damnit, he wanted him so much!

_Fucking touch him!_

The motion was fast and coordinated by instinct. But it felt like an eternity: he stretched his left arm, muscles contracting and lengthening, landing his hand softly over Neji's right shoulder.

The Hyuuga turned fast to look at him. Their gazes connected. Their breath in sync.

Then both felt it. The touch.

It was real and intense and their eyes couldn't divert from each other or lie.  
>So they both knew. They understood by the touch.<p>

_I still feel you._

Neji's heart skipped a beat. His eyes widened. Understanding washed over him.

_Does Shikamaru feel it back? _

His hands shook and the hashi fell on the table with a light thud.

_Is it just me or..._

Shikamaru's lips trembled, he felt his body warm up like fire and he pressed his hand tenderly on Neji's shoulder. Reassuringly. Fingers fumbling over fabric, radiating heat through it, stirring skin and flesh. Blood boiling.

_...did we just reconnect?_

The Hyuuga felt his chest ache surprisingly bittersweet and he licked his lips quickly as a tic.

The air got thick, their mouths got dry, the moment felt tense. But then, hope shook them at the same time: Neji's heart got quieter, Shikamaru's free hand stopped shaking and their eyes were saying all they needed to know now.

That everything was going to be fine.

The Nara felt the angst of the last days disappear when Neji's eyes finally became as serene as summer clouds, and their breaths hitched when the Hyuuga spoke:

"Why don't we play this Shogi match today?" his voice sounded husky and they swallowed thickly at the same time.

And it was checkmate again.

* * *

><p>AN: yes, you can kill me. :D

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It's not the end YET. I'm working on chap 16 which will be the last one, I just needed to get them into the right point. Some reviews would be nice! :)

Cheers! xx Tai


	16. Love Level - end

**A.N:** I don't have enough words to apologise about this _incredibly_ late update. I just hope you enjoy it! :)

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><p><strong>When Shadows Surround You<strong>

**Chapter 16**

_Love Level_

* * *

><p>The spicy smell of cinnamon and ginger hovered thick in the air surrounding them. It was almost sweet, like a tender touch against their skin. It sunk in their nostrils like poisoned air, making Shikamaru breathe heavily and Neji watch his Adam's apple go up and down swallowing saliva.<p>

The air thickened as the shadow-nin caught another pawn and held it above the shogi board for a second. His dark cocoa eyes scrutinizing the other pawns and guessing how many other moves Neji could do after this turn.

The Hyuga watched how Shikamaru's brow furrowed while he studied the board, his torso bent forward, one elbow against his crossed knee and the other arm taut in the air. When the movement arrived it was a slow and precise one. The pawn taped against the wooden board and he stretched his body back to a relaxed position.

The Nara kept his eyes a minute longer on the board, then he took the teacup in his hand and drank his chai slowly, drawing his eyes back to Neji's stoic face. The warm flavour surrounded his tongue and made him think why Neji kept his mask so tight in even a casual moment like this.

Was he hiding something?

Long tresses slid from the sharp shoulder and fell almost over the shogi board. Pearly white eyes fixed on the pawns. Was there a hidden message underneath intelligent moves? What was the goal under Shikamaru's strategy?

_I was the one who should know it..._

He had asked Shikamaru to come, to play _shogi_ and to have some tea. What was the meaning of it? Why was he still playing with his own feelings? Wasn't it he who had decided to make his move? Wasn't it his turn? So what was he waiting for?

_Oh boy, what's the best way to reach you?_

He moved another pawn, lining himself up with the red death. Shikamaru's eyes flickered towards him.

"What are you doing?"

_Reaching you._

"Playing."

"You're killing your pawn." He stated and watched Neji's face keep as blank as it could be. What was he doing? "Neji, that's no use in playing like this, you're letting me win, this is suicide," he complained and took a cigarette from his pocket.

Their eyes met and the Hyuga nodded, rolling his shoulders against the stress.

Shikamaru lit his cigarette, feeling dry smoke snake into his lungs in a known dance. He kept it inside for a while and then exhaled, put his teacup on the table and grabbed another pawn between middle and forefinger. If Neji was trying to say something through the pawns, he was going to get it.

"I'm bored," Neji said when Shikamaru made a move.

The Nara's hand was still hanging in mid-air when their eyes met again.

Black and white.

Shadows and clouds.

_Get a grip on yourself. Don't make such a scene..._

Reason was screaming inside his head, but it was all Neji could do was keep the the lid on the flood of words and feelings. He was bored, he was tired, he was feeling like a coward. He needed to make things clear, and this was the moment.

"There are just a few things I cannot do in this life," he said, putting his hair back and positioning his hands over his crossed legs, feeling his strong bones.

_The moment's arrived._

Shikamaru could feel it. Powerful chakra running over Neji's body and exuding like a subtle energy; surrounding him like the halo of an aura.

Eagerness worked its fingers inside his stomach, making it freeze and burn at the same time. The Nara focused on the feeling, the warm and cold fighting inside his system, the will to run away as far and fast as he could. He stretched the fear away, sucked on his cigarette and noticed the small hairs on his nape and arms bristle.

His mind ran a mile a minute and all he could think of was that he wasn't sure if he was prepared to play this game at the same level as Neji.

_I can't run away. Not again._

He planned his way through this, thinking about what Neji had said.

"_There are just a few things I cannot do in this life,"_

Shikamaru could think at least a hundred things he couldn't do in this life.

The next step was to understand what Neji wanted him to understand.

"Really?" his voice sounded dry from the smoke. His eyes were dead serious and he put together a thousand pieces of the puzzle, preparing himself for the answer.

What was Neji planning? Why did he start from there?

The Hyuga nodded, his eyes straight as an arrow, boring holes into Shikamaru's beautiful features.

"What things can't you do?" Shikamaru asked, killing the distance, reaching closer, and preparing himself for whatever it was.

If it was checkmate, they were good to go from this point on.

The host kept his face still, but under his calm façade his heart was beating fast, hands almost sweating. Something inside his bones and muscles was stirring, fuelling the desire to win the game, ending the doubts, finding answers.

Honour, pride, rank…all those were such worldly things right now. How could Neji feel honoured or pride of himself if he wasn't able to be consistent with that one thing he couldn't stop feeling.

_You._

The Hyuga blinked slowly, stopping a slight tremor of his fingers and concentrating all his chakra in his centre.

He could hear the wind outside and the quietness made him remember the first time he admitted aloud what he felt. The flux of memory taking him back to the Hokage's Tower.

_"But what bothers me the most is that I like him and I can't fight it. I fucking like him..."_

Opal eyes flashed open, shining lively like flames, burning inside out. He watched as Shikamaru took a last drag on his cigarette and extinguished it in his teacup.

Their eyes met and all the Nara saw, before the words started to be said, were ferocious determination, then the Will of Fire burned inside out their bodies.

"I can't fly free from my position in my clan," Neji said, his voice velvety and strong, contrasting with the words of open loss.

Shikamaru watched without a move. It was true, he didn't know how Neji could get away from it either, though he couldn't understand why Neji was talking about something so shameful to his own schemes-

"Neither can I have my father back," the words panged in Shikamaru's heart and his brow twitched.

Neji was opening up as he had never done before. He was rummaging the sand and bringing to light the truths he would never say aloud.

But then, Neji's eyes looked away. He was not used to sharing this much about his grief and struggling.

Shikamaru could feel it, the awkwardness, the hardship of bringing those topics up. In those moments, normally, the Nara would leave the other alone; give him time and space to think.

But this time it was different.

He could feel his own heart speeding up, and understood he wasn't there just to listen, he was there to support Neji, to help him open up.

This was what lovers should do.

This was his moment to show Neji he could rely on him.

The Nara took a deep breath and swallowed thickly. "What else can't you do, Hyuga?"

The air thickened as the words hovered above them like mist. Shikamaru felt his heart burn and beat strongly.

Neji looked down at the shogi board. His hands pressed on his legs, the soft touch of the fabric against his palm feeling nice, endearing. How Shikamaru's skin would feel under his touch right now?

Would it feel tender or bitter?

Would it be raw and rough under his fingertips?

Would it be worth the try?

His lips twisted up, a mischievous smile forming shyly on the edges of his thin lips, making Shikamaru stir in place, not understanding what was happening inside Neji's mind.

"Neji?"

The soft though masculine tones made him look back into those shadowy dark eyes, full forced and aimed.

_You'll always be worth the try._

"I can't keep lying to you, Shikamaru."

x

_Oh god._

Shikamaru's heart had skipped a beat with each word. It contorted inside and made him crave the words he knew Neji was not going to pronounce – and didn't need to.

He watched Neji for a while, his eyes focused on the board and his face more relaxed and showing determination. His opal eyes came up and locked on Shikamaru's. It was full of meanings, of confessions that would never be told.

"I've been trying to fight it," he said. "I asked myself if it was better this way, fighting the feelings and holding it in. But I'm tired of fighting everything all the time."

Neji's fingers entwined in the long and soft tresses of his hair, his eyes closed for a second while his words sunk in. While he accepted he was really doing it.

He was telling the truth. He was reaching the shadow-nin.

"I'm tired of trying to fight you, Shikamaru."

Shikamaru's breath caught in the back of his throat. It was much more intense than what he had expected. Fire stirred from the bottom of his core and burned him inside out, blood running hot in his veins and temptation mixing up with intimidation.

The Nara swallowed, trying to understand all the rushing feelings, the torrent of emotions going on in his chest, under his rib cage. His heart was racing and his throat felt dry.

Right there, in front of him, was Neji, and the man was opening up in a way he didn't know he could. The Hyuga was trying to show him what he himself didn't have the courage to show before.

How could he show it back?

His fingers grabbed hard on his trousers.

_"It's about _you_, Shikamaru, and I'm saying you're completely lovable, so don't stop believing in it...because I could perfectly love you!"_

The words rolled in his mind. The memory sounded like a ghost, almost like another life, one in which they were close enough to say that kind of thing and keep the mask on. But now, listening to Neji's words, he couldn't pretend it was a joke, or that he didn't understand it right.

Now it was real.

No bond.

No sake.

No lies.

Just them, the truth hovering above them and all the possibilities were open.

Their eyes connected and Neji watched Shikamaru's reaction with feigned patience. His mind was blurry and his body was almost burning, the blood inside his veins was boiling with tension, excitement and desire.

He had been waiting for this for so long. To assume his feeling and indulge into the lust he felt since their very first kiss in Yoshino's kitchen.

The images of them in the bathroom, weeks ago, their bodies pressing together, their mouths in tune, no alcohol, no hazy-sleep mind, no lies, just them and their desire and the bond...He could also feel the frustration he felt when Tokuma interrupted them.

Neji could feel inside his chest how Shikamaru wanted him back, and desired him all the same.

Black irises fired up, shone and burned like flames.

The Nara was trying to do the right thing, but he had no idea what the right thing was. All those people who stated he was a genius and that his mind worked a mile a minute were completely wrong right now.

His mind was a mess and all he could do was feel. And what he was feeling was so much and so big he couldn't put it in thoughts, let alone words.

Shikamaru swallowed hard, his mouth dry. He could feel the slight tremor of his own fingers and the strong panicked beats of his heart.

_I should do something._

"Neji..."

His voice sounded small, cracked, almost scared. He bit his lip and felt ashamed of himself.

_The fuck am I doing?_

"I'm...terrible with this...emotional, feelings-thingy. I-"

He ran his hand over his face and tangled his fingers through his thick dark hair.

"Shikamaru," Neji's voice sounded dark and masculine, making the Nara look at him in the eyes.

He watched the Hyuga come to his knees and push the kotatsu to the side with one hand, moving the only barrier between them away. His white eyes were so determined, self-assured.

Neji was placing himself in the crossfire.

"Troublesome, isn't it?" Neji muttered smiling gently and standing on his knees. Then he stared at Shikamaru fiercely.

"Come here, Shikamaru."

His strong, dangerous hand hovered between them, inviting Shikamaru into the crossfire; inviting him into the feelings and sensations he wasn't used to feel. Neji was encouraging him, teaching him he didn't need to run away again.

_Not anymore._

He moved to a kneeling position, his eyes mesmerized by those white globes, his hand moved ahead and their palms touched slightly.

Shikamaru thought his heart had stopped.

Then he realized that Neji's hand was pulling him closer and that warm, cinnamon flavoured breath was brushing against his face.

They looked into each other eyes before moving, and all barriers went down with the power of what they were feeling.

Their mouths parted and both men breathed shakily. Lips touching lightly. Holding onto the moment while their bodies connected like magnets.

Twin motions made them break the scarce distance between them and Neji's tongue darted out, licking Shikamaru's bottom lip sensuously. Hyuga's hand cupped bare nape, anchoring their bodies while the Nara entangled his hands within thick dark hair, pulling the elder closer, making them moan and hiss at the same time.

Hot, damp breaths mingled together.

The maddening sensation made the shadow-nin stop thinking, feeling how all his body seemed to melt inside out. And their mouths clashed in a breath-taking kiss.

_Oh god..._

He waited for this for so long.

Shikamaru tensed up and almost smiled. He wasn't sure what he wanted, he just knew he wanted Neji. His hands caressed the Hyuga's face, almost tenderly as their tongues rolled together, trying, testing each other.

His chest was almost exploding with the feeling; he wanted to have Neji, taste him, touch him, make him his lover and never let this feeling go. He was pretty sure Neji felt the same as the other man's fingers gripped hard enough to mark his skin, almost afraid of letting go.

Neji hummed into the kiss. His tongue lavishing the other's mouth at the same time he pressed their chests together. He was completely turned on, and the idea of having Shikamaru so close, was vertiginous. His fingers massaged scalp, stealing quiet moans.

He sighed shakily against warm lips. Shikamaru took a strong hold on the other's mane and parted their mouths, resting his brow against the cold metal of Neji's hitai-ate.

Their breaths shook and mixed again. Neither dared opening their eyes, holding onto the feelings and the explosion of emotions deep inside strong ribcages. It was like a tsunami and the waves were lava-hot and it was burning them inside out.

They could die living that sensation.

Shikamaru's right hand slid down Neji's nape and travelled to the front touching strong, sharp neck. The tendons flexing under his touch, making him shiver in delight.

Long, pale fore fingers caressed the younger's nape drawing circular patterns in response, rolling his digitals against sweaty, tense flesh; making spirals of chakra flowing through him and relaxing the muscles under his fingertips.

Neji's hand left Shikamaru's nape and slid over his shoulder, going down his chest to touch the point above the younger's pounding heart.

It was beating almost in tune with his.

He moved back and their gazes locked again.

Moon-like eyes glanced tenderly at Shikamaru and he blinked slowly.

The Hyuga took a deep breath as his body shivered. "What took you so long?" he asked low, lips parted and eyes looking directly at black stones.

Shikamaru smiled weakly. His fingers hovered ghostly over tense tendons on pale neck.

For a second, he didn't know how to answer the question, he felt bare of explanations. So he leaned his forehead against the cold hitai-ate again, mingling their breaths and barely touching their noses together.

Tension and arousal filled the air around them, like mist and shadows.

"I guess I didn't believe in love," Shikamaru said low, his voice sounding like the wind, too honest and too harsh at the same time.

Neji lifted his face, his lips brushing past the other's cheek in a ghost kiss. Their eyes darkened at the same time; air became thick, both let out a shortcoming breath at the confession. Neji's right hand pressed stronger against the Nara's heart, feeling it jackhammer inside its ribcage.

Shikamaru looked at him, their eyes saying much more than what they could with words. And the odd sense of anticipation started melting down, desire and lust written in their irises like fever, burning inside their chests and pooling in their loins.

"Damn, Shikamaru," Neji muttered, both his hands taking the chunin's face and bringing him back to another kiss.

Their lips clashed together. Shikamaru's hands drew the elder's back like a sculptor would do; feeling fabric and flesh, and muscles, and bones while the kiss became brutal, animal-like. Desire burned up so damned painfully in his core that he tangled one of his hands in Neji's hair and pulled him away, panting for air and control, feeling the man taking his tie out and caressing his hair.

"Neji..." his voice thick and needy, asking for so many things at a time.

The Nara pulled him even closer, hand cupping his skull and leaning it to the side at the same time his lips dove into the marble-white neck, skimming his lips at the warming flesh, feeling it flex under his touch as he started to spread open mouth kisses there.

Neji hummed vigorously, like a savage animal, his hands gripping and grasping all over his body, pulling the chuunin vest off of his shoulders, involving his neck with one of his arms while the other grabbed onto his hip for balance.

Neji's head was spinning; the feeling was suffocating, the breath would come in a faulting suck and out in a fast whiff. Shikamaru's teeth were marking his skin but he didn't give a damn, he could even bleed for him and he wouldn't mind a bit about it.

The Nara bit down harder and shivered as Neji's fingers pulled his thick hair in response. Both bodies rubbed in a slow but firm movement, looking for friction, for action.

"Shit," the younger breathed against the column of Neji's throat and pressed his clad erection against the other's thigh.

Burning, they were _burning_.

"Oh God-"

Craving worked its devilish fingers under their skin.

"Bed!" Neji commanded.

It all happened too fast. Standing up, drawing hurried steps, pushing, hugging and kissing. All messy, like a dream.

_Or a nightmare._

Neji's thought made him smile against Shikamaru's neck as the man shoved him against the hallway wall.

Neji's hair was loose and messy, their breaths reduced to heavy pants and Shikamaru felt so desperate it ached. Neither of them said a single rational word and their lips and fingertips were confessing lust and feelings as much as they could.

"Ah!" Shikamaru exclaimed as Neji's teeth bit down a tension point between neck and shoulder and took a handful of the younger's hardening shaft.

Neji smiled again, feeling the man's hands opening his robe, pulling it out of his way and working his fly.

Goosebumps broke over tan skin and Shikamaru hissed low, his hands caressing Neji's arms, while the man worked his belt. The Nara felt flushed and needy and maybe they were out of it, or maybe they were too much into it.

He wasn't thinking straight.

_How could I?_

Shikamaru felt his trousers fall and he moved: body pressing Neji against the wall harder and hand entering the loose pants and inside his underwear to grasp his needy hard-on. The move was long and firm, squeezing and corkscrewing.

Neji moaned and grounded against the hand and took the young man by the hair, moving their mouths together. Lips brushed and rasp breaths mingled till their tongues touched and caressed in a slow, feverish dance.

Neji pressed his own hand against the bulge in Shikamaru's underwear and the low growl the chuunin let out was swallowed with eagerness.

Shikamaru shut his eyes closed. It was too strong, too fast and too good. His head was spinning and he felt like he was melting in Neji's hands. He longed for this so hard the reality was making him purr and moan. He couldn't speak; the words were long lost in his throat. His heartbeats were so strong inside his chest he could hear it in his ears and the rush of blood running south made him gasp between kisses and stroke Neji's full hard-on delightfully slow.

"Nhhg," the older man hissed, his hips moving, asking for friction, impatient with the slow and long caresses.

Shikamaru sucked his bottom lip, lingering until he let Neji's mouth go, and his tongue outlined the straight and proud jaw line of the Hyuuga. His hand working Neji's swollen length from root to sensitive tip, thumb playing with the damp gland, teasing slowly, igniting a low sigh.

His lips brushed against Neji's ear shell. "I thought Hyuga were fond of tantric sex," he said and chuckled cocky.

"Not _now_," the Hyuga answered with a shaky growl, his hand moving skillfully and lowering Nara's underwear, his fingers working him fast enough to reach completion in mere seconds.

"Don't!" Shikamaru rasped, teeth sinking on soft skin, his eyes closed, his hand letting the Hyuga go to squeeze at his sides, bruising pale skin, pulling down his trousers and underwear and thrusting into the hand almost senseless. "Nnn-ah…Neji, wait-" he muttered, stopping himself but too mesmerized with the sensations to act properly.

"Wait?" he murmured sarcastic, hands never leaving Shikamaru's shaft as the other helped the younger take his chuunin vest and t-shirt off his head. "I don't want to wait anymore," he purred against Shikamaru's ear, tongue lapping wetly over jaw and down his throat, Adam's pome, kissing the hole between clavicles. "I already waited too long," his voice low and dark made the Nara shiver and one of his hands grabbed onto Neji's hair.

The Hyuga hissed at the strong pull on his hair but kept kissing Shikamaru's shoulder. He would make him sacred and loved and-

"I want to taste every inch of your body," his hand slowed down when he felt Shikamaru thrust into his touch too eagerly.

"Neji…"

"I'm going to worship your soul," he muttered over a nipple and sucked hard on the nub. Fingers dragged over his scalp and he moaned against the warm flesh against his lips.

His tongue slid in a straight pattern along the firm abs and kissed the underside of Shikamaru's bellybutton.

"Ahn.." Neji's chin touched the engorged tip of Shikamaru's shaft at the same time his knees landed hard against the floor, his hand never stopping the steady move. He smirked against Shikamaru's navel and looked up, a taunt grin on his lips as he kissed a hipbone.

Shikamaru started hyperventilating, his heart beating too fast. Not even in his most profane wet dream had he imagined Neji like this. Though the Hyuga looked much alike the first time they made out.

"Look at me," Shikamaru demanded firm and the Hyuga attended.

He felt dizzy when Neji kissed his belly button so kindly it felt like a dream. Shikamaru groaned, getting that he was naked and Neji was completely dressed, and pushed the sleeves down the man's arms, it stuck in his elbows, exposing snow-white flesh, pointed bones and strong shoulders.

Lust and desire rushed inside their veins not under a wicked spell or a damned secret jutsu. It was natural, optional, and real. But above all, it was _consuming_ them.

Neji explored Shikamaru's navel with the tip of his tongue, eyes on him and his hair forming a messy halo around his head and shoulders.

The Hyuga smiled at the younger and his lips brushed sinfully close to the man's gland.

"Oh _my_," Shikamaru pressed his open palms against the wall and looked down, to watch how Neji's tongue darted out and licked his leaking tip. "_Yes_," the whisper fled from his lips.

Intense mooneyes stared at him, one hand holding onto a hipbone and the other stroking Shikamaru carefully.

"Mmm," hummed the Nara, as Neji's mouth covered his gland and sucked fast. "Ah!" he pushed harder against the wall.

The man sucked and lapped, his lips almost brushing black curls. Neji moaned around Shikamaru and scratched lightly at the underside of his length, making the man moan and shiver, hips thrusting forward for more.

The shadowy hallway felt thicker, shadows tickling around them as tension made Shikamaru breathe deeper. He thrust again, the tip of his swollen head hitting the back of Neji's throat and both groaned in delight.

"Come here," he murmured, his voice rough and his heart fast. He recollected himself and evoked all he was feeling, the love, the tenderness, the real feelings under the lust and craving.

Shadows surrounded them in an embrace and Shikamaru's arms reached for Neji, caressing his face and softly pulling him up, holding the Hyuga close, their lips pressing against each other, their breaths shaky and warm.

They looked in each other eyes and swallowed thickly.

"Neji…" fingertips brushed Neji's lips, lovingly, delighted. "You're completely lovable," he whispered the words so quietly that the Hyuga almost lost them in the shadows.

Warmth spread inside them.

"I want you," Neji said, his lips kissing Shikamaru's fingers, their eyes connected and a beautiful smile reached Shikamaru's eyes before he took Neji by his thighs, making his pants fall and lifted him from the floor.

"I want you too," he spoke quietly while walking into Neji's room, nuzzling against the pale column of his throat.

He wanted to love him like he had never done before.

Neji's back touched the mattress and Shikamaru spread open mouth kisses over his chest and abs and navel and reached down, his mouth kissing pale thighs.

Neji braced himself on his elbows and bit his lip watching how Shikamaru caressed his shins and moved up, outlining his knees with his rough fingers and massaging strong pale thighs with the ball of his hands.

"You're beautiful," Shikamaru whispered, his fingers playing with public hair, his wrist touching inadvertently while the other hand held Neji down.

The Hyuga's breathing shook in the air and he closed his eyes, head lolling to one shoulder. Lust and desire, the feelings were filling his chest and it was almost painful.

He wanted that man so much it was difficult to deal with the feelings.

Shikamaru brushed his fingers over white engorged shaft, a devil smile playing on his lips as Neji thrust against the touch. It overwhelmed the Nara and he took Neji in his hand, every finger pressuring slightly against the heated flesh and he stroked fast.

"Oh," the sound made Shikamaru shiver as Neji's fingers pressed against the blankets, his head falling back.

"Neji…" he trailed the words and stroked again, stronger, fingers curling, wrist moving from base to reddish crown.

"Kami-" the Hyuga moaned, opening his wide white eyes and looking at Shikamaru. Pure fire flashed in his irises.

The burn increased and blood boiled inside their veins, down their groins, into heavy members.

"Take me," Neji commanded and Shikamaru's body responded accordingly, he worked up saliva and sucked on his fingers, wetting them to slippery.

Shikamaru smiled at the Hyuga and his mouth wrapped his swollen gland. Shivers ran down Neji's vertebrae as pleasure mixed with pain. The intrusion made his vision blurry and the strong suck made him whimper, seeing white.

The chunin stilled his finger and lapped the flattening length, kissing and licking and trying to make pleasure stronger than pain. And so he did as Neji pressed against his finger.

"Move," he demanded, thrusting inside the shadow-nin's mouth. "Goddamnit," he hissed as a second finger worked its' way in and pressed deeper. "Nhng…"

Neji looked down, watched Shikamaru swallow him to the hilt. Heat involved him, tight and wet, the tongue caressing the underside of his shaft while fingers spread him and massaged tender spots until the Nara pressed against a bundle of nerves, sending strong waves through all Neji's body.

"Oh lord-" he gasped for air, feeling too much at the same time, and his hands clutched at Shikamaru's hair, pulling hard. "Shikam-ah, stop!"

Spasm ran his body and he needed to focus to hold on and stop an early orgasm.

Chuckles hovered through the room as Shikamaru kissed his hipbone and caressed him from inside out. His lips never leaving Neji's body, touching, caressing, spreading chaste kisses over his navel and throbbing length and thighs. His fingers proved a new move and Neji moaned darkly.

"Come here," Neji asked, his eyes closed and his breath faltering.

Shikamaru kissed his way up Neji's body until their lips were together. Shikamaru caressed chest and arms till their fingers tangled beside Neji's head. They stayed quietly until the Hyuga pulled Shikamaru closer with his legs, pressing their hard on together and starting a new wave of heat and pleasure.

Neji held his breath as Shikamaru put their brows together and he noticed his hitai-ate must have fallen off. Shikamaru pressed against him, naturally slippery and hot and his body's moisture licked against Neji's entrance pushing forward until the first ring of muscles relaxed enough.

Neji's jaw tightened and he grunted against the pain. Shikamaru's eyes closed shut as heat started to surround him in a vise-like grip. Legs pulled him even closer and his mouth fell open as he slid in, face hiding in the curve of Neji's neck and hips thrusting slowly.

Heat involved him and his vision went blind for a second or two as both of them panted for air.

It was too hot.

Too good.

_Insane…_

Neji felt his body burn and sting, but nostalgia crossed him like a sword and he shivered like a madman as Shikamaru started moving in shallow thrusts. Body getting used to the intrusion and the cutting pain felt like some understandable old sensation, shocking him from inside out.

Shikamaru seemed afraid of moving, afraid of hurting, but all Neji wanted was _to feel him raw_.

The Hyuga let go of Shikamaru's hands, untangling their fingers and feeling the man's lips kiss his throat tenderly. His lips curved in a small smile and he caressed Shikamaru's loose hair, took his face in his hands and put their lips together in a chaste kiss.

The feeling boiled inside his body and made him feel warm. It wasn't just burning him with lust and desire, it was caressing his heart in a way he wasn't expecting.

Neji captured Shikamaru's trembling bottom lip with his teeth and sucked on it, their eyes opening to look at each other's expression. Flushed faces, messy hair and deep understanding that what they were feeling was exactly what they were supposed to.

He moaned inside Neji's mouth as the jounin's legs embraced him closer, making him move inside him, slowly and deep. Sensation made his vision go white and his breath speed up.

"Neji," he called, brows pressing together as the Hyuga watched him calmly. "I-"

"I know," the man answered, and taking him by the nape he pushed.

Shikamaru's head spun and so did their bodies, as Neji rolled them on the futon, making the Nara moan and shake as Neji sat over his body, moving his hips in small circles until he felt adapted enough to move faster.

He rocked against Shikamaru, his right hand flattening against the heated flesh of Shikamaru's abs and sliding up until he could feel his heart beating against ribcages.

He rocked again, making Shikamaru grab on his hips and pull him down, sliding deeper.

"Oh god-"

His breath caught in the back of his throat as he rolled around in fluid, circular movements, increasing friction and heat. He felt Shikamaru's hands sinking on his skin, while the younger man rose himself to a sitting position. The Nara stole a kiss from Neji, forcing their bodies together, feeling the strong muscles contracting and expanding with the movement.

It was hot and intense and oh so passionate. They moved in sync, slow and deep, feeling the pleasure starting to boil under their skins. Neji moaned into Shikamaru's neck, his hands caressing the younger's bare shoulders and back, blunt nails scratching the tanned skin and a lustful plea for more filled the air.

The heat spreading through their bodies was maddening. Shikamaru pulled Neji even closer to him, kissing him hard. Neji hummed into the kiss, holding the Nara's face and tangling his fingers into dark hair. The Hyuga laced his legs around Shikamaru's waist, letting the younger set their pace while he nibbled the tanned neck and panted at the Nara's ear.

"Hm, Neji," Shikamaru moaned, pulling Neji's hair back and exposing the porcelain neck to kiss the Adam's pome while forcing their bodies to press flat on the futon.

He heard Neji gasping for air, his back arching off the mattress, urging their pace more and more. Their bodies melted together, souls filled with raw emotion and pleasure consuming their minds fully.

Neji couldn't think; he was surrounded by feelings and emotions and friction. It was overwhelming and almost tender, the way their bodies moved in sync and their breaths mingled, purring moans and curses.

It made them feel bound again.

Cells, skins, feelings and drumming hearts connected. They could feel each other with a roll of hurry hips and a rasp pant for air. It was almost impossible to handle the sensation.

"I'm close," Shikamaru warned, steading Neji's body on the mattress, keeping the moves slow and kissing his lips softly, feeling the man's hands caress his back and draw circles in the small of his spine.

He pressed his brow against Neji's straight clavicle and breathed deeply, his hand leaving the other's hips and cupping his rock hard erection, pumping it slowly until he felt enough control to start thrusting his hips stronger again.

"Yes," the word rolled in Neji's tongue like a sensuous plea and he moved into the touch.

Shikamaru speed up their pace, his hips hitting with a loud damp sound against Neji's skin as he moved and stroked the man at the same time, making Neji moan and gasp and grab on his shoulders as his head fell back and his body arched front, their chests sliding together.

"Oh. God," he muttered. Legs clutching around Shikamaru's body and tensing up. Muscles contracting around Shikamaru and driving them into the edge of pleasure. "Nnhg..."

"Neji." Shikamaru called his name loud and clear, his abs tensing up, feeling it boiling down his groins and heating his whole body in bliss and pleasure.

Orgasm struck their bodies seconds apart. White shock blinded their eyes and warmth spread around them through waves of feverish rapture.

Panting for air, Neji stroked Shikamaru's hair, their eyes still closed and their hearts trying to calm down inside their chests.

Pearly white eyes opened slowly and he stared the ceiling. He slid his legs along with the other's until he felt the futon. Suddenly, he started feeling tired and heavy and extremely relaxed. Neji felt Shikamaru moving slowly and rolling to his side, his arms around him, as the Nara rested his heated face over his chest.

Neji hooked his arm around Shikamaru and kept caressing the unruly hair between his fingers. The silence was relaxing, cozy and familiar. He felt pain in his lower back and ass but he could bare that easily. So Hyuga Neji pulled the blanket over their bodies and kissed the top of Shikamaru's head.

"Neji," the man muttered.

"Mm?"

"I'm in love with you," he said low, his voice muffled against Neji's chest, his breath tickling his pale skin.

His arms pulled Shikamaru even closer and his lips kissed his brow and temple and his hair tenderly. He chuckled and closed his eyes with a big smile on his lips.

"Me too."

x

Struggling was definitely something that bothered Shikamaru the most. And right now he was squirming under Neji's body, wanting for more.

_Damn tantric shit!_

He felt Neji's hand caressing his back and his lips started kissing him again. Slowly. Terribly and amazingly slow. Shikamaru decided he should be more patient and just _feel_ the glories of tantric sex.

It would take him a long way to get used to its pace and the whole 'control and deprivement' thing. Though he would do that just fine.

_If the orgasm is _this_ good..._

So blood ran South and he stopped thinking because, finally, Neji was doing it fast and his body was screaming for completion and the Hyuga held him down for so long he just wanted to come really hard.

And so he did.

Waves of burning pleasure ran all over his body like an earthquake, his eyes and mind went blind, he gasped and moaned and shook. And the warmth covered him like a blanket, he was in heaven.

_Yeah, I can do that._

"That's troublesome," he muttered after some minutes, voice rough and throat dry.

"Is it?" Neji asked, standing up in his nudity and smiled cocky. "Why?"

Shikamaru smiled lazily, his eyes hidden in the hook of his arm. He felt tired and light all at the same time, and the warmness inside his chest was surprising.

"If you're going to wake me up like this, I wouldn't mind moving in," he joked, tongue licking his lips in a quick move.

Neji chuckled, sitting down on the bed again and leaning over Shikamaru. He planted a kiss on his lips and on the tip of his nose, moving Shikamaru's arm away he looked inside dark sleepy gaze. His hair fell down like a curtain and tickled the shadow-nin's neck in a soft caress.

"You hungry?"

"Starved."

"Let's have breakfast," he said barely kissing Shikamaru's lips.

"Sounds like a plan," the younger said, pulling Neji closer and kissing him harder.

After a simple but tasty breakfast they sat together by the kotetsu, and recalled their stupid bond and all the events in between.

It was different to think about it right now, how everything developed to something bigger and out of their hands. Shikamaru told Neji that he didn't see the feeling coming; it was so hard to accept it he needed his father's help to see it clearly.

The Hyuga watched him with big bright eyes, imagining Shikaku telling Shikamaru that the boy was in love with Neji. They even laughed about it, though back then, when it happened, Shikamaru had felt stupid and torn.

How could a person not see all those signals and understand them?

After a nice cup of coffee the younger ninja felt better about himself and listened to Neji's own bad situations. He chuckled when the Hyuga told him that Tokuma wouldn't leave him alone because he felt Neji was too sad to be by himself.

Shikamaru had a lot of questions, and he wanted to ask them; about the seal, about Neji's relationship with Tokuma, about his whole childhood...but as a good strategist and a brilliant mind, he understood the answers would come someday.

Trust comes with time.

The idea of being together with Neji for longer made him shiver and he cut the man in the middle of a sentence, stealing a kiss and smiling apologetically.

He would love to be able to do that, make this relationship work to upper levels.

They also apologised for their previous behaviour and confessed dirty little secrets like:_ "I should have kissed you before,"_ or_ "Your mother advised me about you,_" or "_Your cousin was trying to pair us up as well,_" or "_Can we go back to bed?_".

Though they didn't.

Shikamaru had work to get done and Neji needed to help Hinata training. So they just kissed and chuckled about how cheesy and stupid they were being.

With hearts drumming excitedly inside their chests and shallow breaths, they didn't need to talk about the relationship, but it was obvious in the air surrounding them: they were together.

Even Shikamaru not knowing exactly what that meant, but he could work it out and deal with the novelty. It was going to be challenging.

When the Nara walked out of the door and smiled sheepishly at Neji, the older wanted to pull him back to bed and never, ever, let him go.

_Kami, what am I thinking?_

Neji put a long lock of hair behind his ear and watched Shikamaru gaze at him doubtful.

"So," he said and put his both hands in his pockets.

"Yeah," Neji crossed his arms in his chest and waited.

Though Shikamaru looked at him and bit on his bottom lip like he was a lost kid and Neji chuckled.

_Of course, he had never been in any kind of relationship before..._

"You should come more often," he offered, his smile becoming a very seductive one.

"Yeah," Shikamaru muttered deep. "I really should."

Neji let out a pleased sigh at the answer and nodded.

"So, dinner tonight?" the Nara asked casually.

"Sounds good," Neji hold back a grin and watched Shikamaru sigh and jump to the roof. "Troublesome Nara," he whispered as he smiled closing the door, it had been a long time since he last felt so happy.

Warmth spread inside his chest and he bit his lip.

_Fate, I should start thanking you..._

They were at love level, definitely.

* * *

><p><strong>End.<strong>

**Note: **well, that's it. I loved to write this fic, I hope you enjoy the end and maybe tell me what do you think about it ^^ If any of you like the way I write and would like to read more of my ShikaNejiShika fanfictions, you can go to my profile and look for:

**Shelter - **Their bodies were trying to say what their mouths were taught not to pronounce. Feelings could lead them to weakness. But together they could stand still. Holding on.** M, oneshot, complete. Ninja-angst.** (Be careful with the lemons ^^)

**Forsaken - **When life leaves us blind, love keeps us kind. It keeps us kind. **M, long, in-progress. Drama-romance. **

**THANK YOU for all your kind words, cheering, criticism, comments, and mainly for your patience. The best thing about writing is bonding with the readers, I'm truly sorry about how long it took me to write a proper end to this fanfiction, and I hope to see you at my other works. **

**xxx Tai**


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